Pictures - July 2009

"Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body." - Sir Richard Steele

***

Resuming my incredibly tardy picture series (before July rolls around and laps this series):


"Back off. I'm a taxpayer"


Beat the ang mohs with Curtin


Bugis Junction's sad idea of retail therapy


Crystal Jade's job ad starts out bilingual, but the job listing is only in Mandarin


How bad the economy was last year: Israelis had to come here to sell Dead Sea Shit


"Every Sunday at 11am, K88 Coffee House will be giving away FREE Economy Rice, Chicken Rice or BBQ Fish Slice /Chicken to old folks aged 60 years old and above."
I don't know if this offer is still on


SMU Graduands and Cosplay at City Hall. The cosplayers shouted "sumimasen" at the people taking pictures of them, until they realised they were still in Singapore and changed to "excuse me".


Maths failure on Supreme Court Heritage sign


Japanese buffet in Great World City - with no Japanese desserts


H-Two-O ad. I don't know what the ang moh is doing in the background. Maybe it's a symbol of submission.


Hashima from Ah Chew Desserts. It comes in balls instead of a contiguous whole, but hey it's $8


Flyer for Harvard College in Asia Program (HCAP) - you have to be really brave to lie on the grass in the tropics


Jamon Iberico Hum Sup guy gave me


Gender discrimination in job ad. I don't recall seeing ads which only ask for males.


L.H.O.O.Q


"This lift is CCTV-ready".
Presumably it means it hasn't been installed yet.


Mamee - containing sustainable palm oil, and traces of crustacea and fish


Mamee - with optional flavour sachets looking like condoms


"Singapore's premiere (sic) pageant [for] married women... [who] work with their husband... in becoming positive role models"
Presumably the ideal for women is to get married and stay pretty


NDP - celebrating mixed marriages


Displaying a NTU certificate in NUS is not the wisest of moves


"Paws ''N'' Furs" - pet shop urging you to skin your pets


Politicised carpets sign at Holland Village; notice the flag of Kashmir


Quizno's Bagus. Except for the third (Classic Italian), which wasn't as nice. But maybe that's because we were full already.


"Salt Cookie".
Damn Japs (it wasn't salty).


A dying tradition - Chinatown ritual (see, that's why someone else is also snapping it)


Migrate to Australia ad in Today


VCH: "Music should strike fire from the heart of a man, and bring tears from the eyes of a woman" - Beethoven


"Visit Remarkable Adelaide"
Well, I guess it's slightly more entertaining than Perth


"Well known food... CHEF is mad but the food is not bad" - Buona Vista market
The auntie came to hunt me down later, and I told her that with such a sign, she was asking for attention, so I gave what was desired to her (this is the u r wt u wr principle, but if I apply it to u r wt u wr I will end up in jail because Singapore is a sexist society which treats women as sacred temples)



Presumably this teaches kids to be Zorro


Intrepid fencers



Waffletown - the best fried chicken in Singapore. Though with a very kiam loyalty card scheme; if I can redeem something from it, I know I've been eating too much fried chicken.




Their wonderfully tender and non-greasy meat



"A fuller bust makes you feel complete as a woman"


"Bust Stations... is able to stir up sympathetic nerves, strengthen effective pressure of all capillaries in breast tssue and promote the breast fats to absorb full female hormone and fatty acid to improve the whole breast."


"Now I feel like a REAL woman"
If you're not a REAL woman if you're less well-endowed than her, this may explain why trannies are so popular in Singapore


"Breast cancer myth busted!"
They forgot the one about men getting it too

I thought Waiwai was dead

"Democracy substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few." - George Bernard Shaw

***

Anri Suzuki offers sex as compensation for Japan's war crimes



A Japanese adult-film star, Anri Suzuki, says she has been giving out free sex sessions to Chinese students as a way of giving back for Japan's World War II sins.

The bizarre situation was revealed today in the "Korea Times" newspaper.

24-year-old Anri Suzuki studied history at University, holding a Doctorate in the discipline.

Suzuki focused on the Japanese invasion of China, writing the paper, "The History of the Japanese Invasion into China."

Anri Suzuki said she was so shocked to learn about her nation's past that it was time to make up for her country's early 20th century wrongs by giving back, one man at a time.

Anri Suzuki told the Korean Times: "We have to respect history and cannot obliterate it. I want to cure the wounds of Chinese with my body."

"I think it is psychological compensation to them. Actually, Chinese students treat me more friendly and comfortably than Japanese."

Between 1937 and 1945, China and Japan fought the Second Sino-Japanese War, resulting in the deaths of approximately 23 million people, including 18 million civilians.

Japan invaded China in the late 1930's, the result of a decades-long Japanese imperialist policy aiming to dominate China politically and militarily.

Links - 17th June 2010

"If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in." - Bradley's Bromide

***

Apple bans Gizmodo from wwdc - "If a free press needs to behave, then it is not free at all. The job of a free press is to get the story that a company, a government or another official company spokesman is trying to stop the public from knowing... It is a shorter route than you think from banning Gizmodo from a trade show to banning Fox News from a While House News Conference or a field press member being prevented from covering a war atrocity somewhere"

Apple turns sour on free speech - "Ulysses has now been declared obscene again — this time by Apple... Daryl Cagle, the cartoonist, had a series of gags on Tiger Woods refused in April, again because the work “contains content that ridicules public figures”. Joshua Benton, director of the Nieman Journalism Lab at Harvard University, says the media are not used to “news kiosks telling us what to write. The idea that ridiculing public figures is not appropriate pretty much means the entire media industry isn’t appropriate”.... Campaigners point out that the company praised the Dalai Lama in a 1997 ad campaign, but in 2009 PC World reported that apps mentioning the Dalai Lama are banned from Apple’s Chinese App Store... Padraig Reidy of Index on Censorship, the campaigning group, says Apple is a “monopoly in the making, a monolith which is forcing the media to tailor its products to the taste of one massive corporation”. He sees it as creating “a bland landscape where media tries to avoid controversy and breaking controversial stories”"

The Perils of Studying Economics - "On some issues people who study undergraduate economics are more doctrinaire free marketers than professional economists... Ph.D. economists were... more likely than economics majors (or, frankly, any majors) to think that income inequality should be reduced and that government spending should not be reduced, and they were somewhat less worried about federal budget deficits... it’s somewhat eye-opening to come to college and learn that free markets lead to maximum societal welfare and taxes impose a deadweight loss on society — the pictures are so simple and compelling... But when you learn more about principal-agent problems, information asymmetries, and so on, you learn that those simple pictures are simplistic to the point of being misleading. That’s why Joseph Stiglitz argues in Freefall that understanding economics is crucial to understanding why free markets often lead to suboptimal outcomes"

Sewage plant plays Mozart to stimulate microbes - "Sewage operator believes chords and cadences of compositions speed up way the organisms break down biomass... So far Stucki's preferred composition is The Magic Flute"

Daniel Klein: Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader? - "Who is better informed about the policy choices facing the country—liberals, conservatives or libertarians? According to a Zogby International survey that I write about in the May issue of Econ Journal Watch, the answer is unequivocal: The left flunks Econ 101... the left has trouble squaring economic thinking with their political psychology, morals and aesthetics"
Addendum: So much for liberals mocking conservatives as ignorant

Feckblog: Male vs Female Privilege - "What I'm trying to do is refute the notion that either sex is privileged over the other. Of course, I don't deny that there are certain privileges given to men that are not given to women. What I reject is the concept of Male Privilege: The idea that men are unambigously privileged over women. In reality, women have their own privileges, and very often privilege and obligation go hand in hand... Which sex has the better package of privileges and obligations is largely a matter of personal preference. Yes, most feminists think men have it better, but that's because modern feminism, having little left to offer a woman who relishes her role as a full-time wife and mother, disproportionately attracts women who think they're getting a raw deal. This may also explain why lesbians tend to be overrepresented among feminists--denied male privileges and unable to take advantage of those female privileges tied to heterosexuality, they really do get a raw deal... a common feminist tactic is to cast any attempt to point out female privileges as whining by men afraid of feminism's challenge to their own privilege. Of course, talking about Male Privilege is speaking truth to power, not whining."

The End of Men - "Feminists [claimed that] “There’s no question that there exists a universal preference for sons”... couples were requesting more girls than boys... “It’s the women who are driving all the decisions... Women live longer than men. They do better in this economy. More of ’em graduate from college. They... do everything men do, and sometimes they do it a whole lot better”... Women... now hold a majority of the nation’s jobs. The working class, which has long defined our notions of masculinity, is slowly turning into a matriarchy, with men increasingly absent from the home and women making all the decisions. Women dominate today’s colleges and professional schools—for every two men who will receive a B.A. this year, three women will do the same. Of the 15 job categories projected to grow the most in the next decade in the U.S., all but two are occupied primarily by women... Women are also starting to dominate middle management, and a surprising number of professional careers... female CEOs... outearned their male counterparts by 43 percent, on average, and received bigger raises... marriage has disappeared because women are setting the terms—and setting them too high for the men around them to reach... the more women dominate, the more they behave, fittingly, like the dominant sex. Rates of violence committed by middle-aged women have skyrocketed since the 1980s, and no one knows why"
This won't stop feminists from complaining that women are oppressed

YouTube - lee enfield sniper rifle (lego)

Hippopotamus on menu at Beijing zoo - "After watching the beasts in their cages, diners at the zoo's restaurant can gnaw on the webbed toes of a hippopotamus, chew a kangaroo tail, nibble a deer's penis or slurp down a bowl of ant soup... In the past, notices on each of the zoo's animal cages included information about which parts were the tastiest and most useful according to traditional Chinese medicine. Those details have now been omitted"
Another reason to go to BJ - tout de suite!

The Case for Calling Them Nitwits - "It’s fair to say that the Taliban employ the world’s worst suicide bombers: one in two manages to kill only himself. And this success rate hasn’t improved at all in the five years they’ve been using suicide bombers... In Afghanistan, as in many cultures, a manly embrace is a time-honored tradition for warriors before they go off to face death. Thus, many suicide bombers never even make it out of their training camp or safe house, as the pressure from these group hugs triggers the explosives in suicide vests... One video, captured recently by the thermal-imagery technology housed in a sniper rifle, shows two Talibs in southern Afghanistan engaged in intimate relations with a donkey. Similar videos abound, including ground-surveillance footage that records a Talib fighter gratifying himself with a cow... Many laptops seized from the Taliban and al-Qaeda are loaded with smut. U.S. intelligence analysts have devoted considerable time to poring over the terrorists’ favored Web sites, searching for hidden militant messages"

Films featuring smoking to be given 18 certificate in bid to stop children taking up the habit - "Films including 101 Dalmatians, Pinocchio, Peter Pan and numerous James Bond classics would all be considered adult-only movies. More recent productions including Titanic and Lord of the Rings would also be affected by the plans put forward to Plymouth City Council by health officials."

The rules that phone sex workers have to follow

"Everything of importance has been said before by somebody who did not discover it." - Alfred North Whitehead

***

delanceyplace: delanceyplace.com 6/15/10 - phone sex

"There were many mothers [among the phone sex workers]. All were great women, and talking with them during the slow periods was the best part of the job. Let's just say odd jobs collect odd characters to work at them, so the stories they had were great. ...

The first call [I received] was on the one-nine-hundred number, which requires the workers to follow special rules. The one-eight-hundred number involves the use of a credit card to talk to a woman, so the age of the caller can often be verified, but many callers who use the nine-hundred line are under eighteen. We had a fiber optic Big Brother occasionally monitoring the phone calls to make sure we followed the rules. So we needed to make sure that we obeyed the rules and didn't verbally give any hard-ons to minors (without them really working for it).

In addition, the rules for phone sex lines out of California in the late '90s, as explained by my supervisors, specified that there could be no talk of bestiality, underage sex, or incest. This was taken so seriously that we couldn't even use phrases like 'Daddy's little girl' or 'Let me be your sex kitten' without verbally clarifying that we were over eighteen and not related to the callers, or that we weren't actually feline. Do you know what a c**k block it is, during a naughty-high-school-cheerleader-being-disciplined-by-the-principal story, when you have to stop and explain twice that you are an eighteen-year-old high school cheerleader?

So, to make sure the callers were eighteen or older, we played the math game: We had to get the callers to give us not only their age, but year born and year graduated from high school. There was a chart of corresponding years so the phone sex workers wouldn't have to do the math. If callers messed up on the math, they failed, and not only did they not get any 'Baby, give it to me, give it to me hard:' but their coded phone numbers were put on a list. If any number appeared on the list more than three times, our supervisor would call the parents. Yes, the phone sex line would turn you in, junior.

Along with Minor Math, we had to play Feed Me the Line. We couldn't use any sexually explicit words or phrases till the caller used them first. We couldn't actually talk dirty to callers till they talked dirty to us, and strangely enough, getting a very horny man to talk dirty to you isn't as easy as it seems. Most of the callers are slightly socially retarded toward women. If they were able to talk to women about what they wanted, they would be getting laid without Ma Bell playing madam. The typical caller expected you to be an easy verbal lay: Just dial the number and instant orgasmic satisfaction. But I couldn't give them what I knew they wanted without them 'feeding me the line.' So it was a conversational tug-of-war: 'Talk dirty to me.' 'Tell me about what you want me to do for you.' 'Talk dirty to me.' 'Come on, baby, tell me your fantasy.' 'I want you to talk dirty to me.' 'Tell me exactly what you want me to talk about.' 'Talk dirty to me.' And so on and so on."

--- Hos, Hookers, Call Girls, and Rent Boys / David Henry Sterry and R.J. Martin, Jr., Editors, from a contribution by Lilycat

More SDN events (June 2010)

"There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?" - Woody Allen

***

Event 1:


"Make Yourself Irresistible to Successful Men

A dynamic and heartfelt workshop by Inqueenz Founder and ex-Beauty Queen, Genecia Luo who will share with the participants her personal journey of meeting and dating successful men. Learn from the insider on how to bring out your inner magnet and attract the Right Men!"

(I can't access the event on the SDN website, but that usually happens to me anyway)

From elsewhere, we learn that:

1) The one-hand-on-waist, one-leg-forward pose is supposed to be attractive



2) The event is for women only (SDN promotes Family Values!)

3) There is a corresponding event called "Make Yourself Irresistible to Successful Men! (For Females Only)"

I guess that that, by posing the corresponding question for women, answers the original question for men: to be Irresistible to Successful Men, be a Beautiful Woman; to be Irresistible to Beautiful Women, be a Successful Man.


Event 2:


"Show your enthusiasm and win great prizes by dressing as a Pixar animated character! You could come as a cowgirl, spaceman, chef, superhero or boy scout, as long as it is a Pixar film character. Imagination is your only limitation!"

I was tempted to register for this event and come as one of the following:


Rex (Toy Story)


Kevin (Up)


Remy (Ratatouille)

Sure, I wouldn't get any dates but it'd be fun!

"Humorous Books" and Pearl Necklaces

The above is the Twitter profile image of @HumorousBooks, few of whose latest tweets have anything to do with books, of which none have anything to do with Humorous Books.

In other news, I find women wearing pearl necklaces amusing. Especially when (as above), a pearl necklace seems to be *all* that they're wearing.

Front page of the Singapore Expat Meetup:

Cats and Women

"Nothing inspires forgiveness quite like revenge." - Scott Adams

***

Cats and Women

1) Cats do what they want.
2) They rarely listen to you.
3) They're totally unpredictable.
4) They whine when they are not happy.
5) When you want to play, they want to be alone.
6) When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7) They expect you to cater to their every whim.
8) They're moody.
9) They leave hair everywhere.
10) They drive you nuts and cost an arm and a leg.

Conclusion: They're tiny little women in cheap fur coats.

In Memoriam

In Memoriam: Kai Kai and Dar Dar

May they find other people's toes to suck. And have sex for 210+ times.

On faux "diversity"

Comment on: What I got wrong about women in science - Boing Boing

""Diversity" for the sake of diversity is just as pernicious as intentional discrimination. It says to the person "I'm only including you because I need a token, not because you deserve it on merit. The true test of enlightenment is when you can look past the color of someone's skin without purposely excluding OR including."

Widow’s bustline secret uncovered

"I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away." - Oscar Levant

***

Malaysia Boleh!


Widow’s bustline secret uncovered

"FOR almost a year, a widow in Jabi, Segamat, has been lapping up the attention lavished on her by men due to her ample bustline, reported Harian Metro.

However, the secret of her Dolly Parton-sized top was exposed when police found that she had been hidding ganja in her bra.

The newspaper reported that police uncovered the secret when they noticed that one of her “breasts” was larger than the other.

It quoted Segamat OCPD Supt Abdul Majid Mohd Ali as saying that a team raided her house last Tuesday after suspecting that the 29-year-old woman was involved in drugs.

Although they did not find any drugs in the house, the policemen became suspicious after noticing the difference in the size of her breasts.

“The left was bigger than the right. After further inspection, we found one gram of ‘ganja’ worth RM100 hidden in a slit cut into her bra.

“We believe the woman was acting as the middle person,” he said."

"Militant" Atheists vs Militant Islamists and Militant Christianists

Links - 11th June 2010

"The one serious conviction that a man should have is that nothing is to be taken too seriously." - Nicholas Butler

***

Useless, jobless men – the social blight of our age - "One in seven working-age households is dependent on benefits for more than half its income. More than half of all lone parents depend on the State for at least half their income. William Beveridge would be horrified to discover that the safety net he designed has become a trap, creating generations of worklessness and dwindling self-esteem. It is also creating a glut of unemployed, unwanted, unmarriageable men... The taxpayer has become the father: one in four mothers is single and more than half live on welfare... Robert Rowthorn, Professor of Economics at Cambridge, has shown that female and male worklessness have been going in opposite directions for 30 years, well before this latest “mancession”. His research suggests that half the rise in lone parenthood in the past 30 years may be due to male unemployment. He believes that governments must start to focus on these men, and question the feminisation of education and the workplace"

Tetris and its Connection to Confucianism - "Not only does the game consider the duality of order and chaos but trains and improves your decision-making skills... Tetris accesses a basic human desire that was the genesis of rituals in ancient China. One difference between the Tetris ritual and Xunzi’s philosophy lies in his conception of human nature as inherently bad... “The gentleman is harmonious but not conformist. The little man is conformist but not harmonious”. Finding the harmony between your speed and the skill level of the game is how to find the Way of Tetris, which is hidden just below the surface of normal play... Tetris, in its highest and purest form, is about learning how to fail"

Irreligious - redefining Christianity and religion.: Aftermath of a party - "God is with CHC. God will protect CHC. The wicked will get their just desserts. What they all seem to be saying is this: The church can do no wrong. Pastor Kong knows what he is doing. We trust him."

Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain - "We, non-believers, atheists, and ex-Muslims, are establishing or joining the Council of Ex-Muslims of Britain to insist that no one be pigeonholed as Muslims with culturally relative rights nor deemed to be represented by regressive Islamic organisations and 'Muslim community leaders'. Those of us who have come forward with our names and photographs represent countless others who are unable or unwilling to do so because of the threats faced by those considered 'apostates' - punishable by death in countries under Islamic law."

YouTube - Mini Cannon Firing and Destroying Targets. Among the World's Smallest Guns - "Homemade miniature cannon shoots and destroys objects. It fires steel balls with great power and accuracy"

"Dream Ball" Project - "To the children in The Third World; Tanzania, Rwanda, Burundi, Somalia, Congo and etc, who cann't enjoy football freely because of poverty, war and natural disaster, having a football means a lot and can be a dream and hope to escape from their poor life. However, the children are so poor that they can not buy a football. So, they play football with the ball made of plastic bag or a coconut palm leaves Therefore, giving them thier own footballs which can give them hope, is our aim of this project."
Using Aid Containers which turn into footballs - ingenious!

What a daft way to stop your spaniel eating the milkman - "As we know, one man once got on one plane in a pair of exploding hiking boots and as a result everyone else in the entire world is now forced to strip naked at airports and hand over their toiletries to a man in a high-visibility jacket. In other words, the behaviour of one man has skewed the concept of everyday life for everyone else. And we are seeing this all the time... We see the same sort of overreaction to paedophilia. Just because one man in your town likes to watch schoolgirls playing netball, you must apply for a licence if you wish to take a friend’s kids to school in the morning. And I now run the risk of having my camera impounded by the police if I take pictures of my children playing on the beach... We seem to have lost sight of the fact that throughout history 90% of people have behaved quite normally 90% of the time... What good did all the airport legislation achieve? None... Did it prevent a chap from getting on board with exploding underpants? No, it did not."

Hamas refuses flotilla aid delivered by Israel
I'm sure people will blame Israel somehow; "Hamas's forces have bulldozed the homes of Gazans who had moved onto former settlement land without authorisation"

Are Cameras the New Guns? - "When the police act as though cameras were the equivalent of guns pointed at them, there is a sense in which they are correct. Cameras have become the most effective weapon that ordinary people have to protect against and to expose police abuse. And the police want it to stop."

On Language - Revert - "As Alison Waters, a lexicographer at Oxford University Press, told The Indian Express, revert in the sense of "reply" is one of eight contributions from Indian English included in the latest batch of OALD additions. It has spread beyond India, however, cropping up in the English of Singapore, Malaysia, Hong Kong and elsewhere. In these countries, the usage has occasionally been deemed improper by language authorities. Singapore's Speak Good English Movement, for example, labels it "a mistake" that should be avoided in official correspondence."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/carrotsglazedwithcum_80467? - "The worst shortened URL ever"

Unemployed women given £1,000 makeovers to help them find a solvent husband - "They estimate that if 70 women find a solvent husband, the council can save £330,000 on welfare payments. They also believe that finding love will help get the unemployed off state benefits by improving their confidence and ambitions. So far, just one candidate has signed up for the voluntary scheme, which is aimed at women but open to men as well... In 2008, jobless Dutch in Maastricht were given a 10-week course of 'regression therapy' at a cost of £720 in the hope that coming to terms with their past lives would help them find a job."

Publishing Company Under Fire for Putting Warning Label on Constitution - "Wilder Publications warns readers of its reprints of the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence, Common Sense, the Articles of Confederation, and the Federalist Papers, among others, that “This book is a product of its time and does not reflect the same values as it would if it were written today.” The disclaimer goes on to tell parents that they "might wish to discuss with their children how views on race, gender, sexuality, ethnicity, and interpersonal relations have changed since this book was written before allowing them to read this classic work." Walter Olson, senior fellow at the Cato Institute, says the company may be trying to ensure that oversensitive people don't pull its works off bookstore or library shelves... "Any idea that’s 100 years old will probably offend someone or other"... The warning seems to be offending more people than the documents themselves"

Gallery: Digitizing the past and present at the Library of Congress

Do Nice Guys Finish Last? (RP) - "I will employ popular culture, psychological research, feminist debates over experience, and random internet rants, in order to explore some of the discourse on this question to demonstrate why it is important, analyze attempts to answer it, and suggest a program of research to ask it in a more fruitful manner."
When I read "I originally wrote this paper for a Woman’s Studies class in college", I thought it was going to be crap, but it was surprisingly good, and an extensive survey of the literature on this issue
Addendum: This is from the website "Feminist Critics", at http://www.feministcritics.org/

BP OIL SPILL: Lord Tebbit and Boris Johnson attack Obama's 'anti-British' rhetoric - ""The whole might of American wealth and technology is displayed as utterly unable to deal with the disastrous spill - so what more natural than a crude, bigoted, xenophobic display of partisan political Presidential petulance against a multinational company?"... Lord Tebbit pointed out that U.S. engineering giant Halliburton was also involved in the events leading up to the Gulf disaster. And he added: 'It is time that our American were reminded that they sang a different tune when the American company Union Carbide killed many thousands of Indians at Bhopal. Not to mention when the American company Occidental killed 167 people on a North Sea oil rig in 1988"

Mind Over Mass Media - "NEW forms of media have always caused moral panics: the printing press, newspapers, paperbacks and television were all once denounced as threats to their consumers’ brainpower and moral fiber. So too with electronic technologies. PowerPoint, we’re told, is reducing discourse to bullet points... But such panics often fail basic reality checks... the denunciations of video games in the 1990s coincided with the great American crime decline... For a reality check today, take the state of science... scientists are never far from their e-mail, rarely touch paper and cannot lecture without PowerPoint... Critics of new media sometimes use science itself to press their case, citing research that shows how “experience can change the brain.” But cognitive neuroscientists roll their eyes at such talk... Media critics write as if the brain takes on the qualities of whatever it consumes, the informational equivalent of “you are what you eat.” As with primitive peoples who believe that eating fierce animals will make them fierce... Far from making us stupid, these technologies are the only things that will keep us smart"
Keywords: "the internet is making us stupid", "the telegraph"

"The reason why Mr. Lee Kwan Yew has no Facebook Friend."

SMRT FAIL [Whale]!

"I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting." - Ronald Reagan

***

GO GREEN WITH SMRT 2010:


Maybe they didn't pay the designers enough and this is how they express discontent.


The original Fail Whale:



Epic Fail Whale:



Fail Whale Cake:



Fail Whale Homer:



Fail Whale in the Flesh:



Fail Whale on the Flesh:

Quotes - 7th June 2010

"They always talk who never think." - Matthew Prior

***

Quotes:

I came from Cedar. Like half the people were butches.

This official... When the King became older he turned to the Ws. Wine and Women... The official was very sad. He moved to the mountain... He threw himself from the mountain to the river. I thought he was talking about the Dumpling Man... There are a lot of this kind f people [in Chinese history]... After you listen to this sort of story, you also want to fight for your country.

Gabbie, I miss your thingy. [Me: Err] Your handkerchief

G spot... Goal post

Now we're gambling [Someone: Gambling is at least $2 {in bets} one]

[Me to a female friend: Paizuri is something you can't do] Is it gay sex? [Me: No] Does it involve a penis? [Me: No. Paizuri is titty-fucking] [Someone: What's that?] [Me: You're better off not knowing]

He told his sister he had a friend getting married during Christmas [so he couldn't travel]. I was so touched. I went home and told my mother

[To a guy] Did you cut your hair? I wouldn't say it if you were a girl, but I think it looked better before. [Me: Women don't appreciate honesty] It's called tact.

[On someone's knowing what a fascinator is] How do you know this sort of things? [Me: That's usually the sort of thing people tell me] (thing)

Hi. [Me: You look like an Ah Lian] What an opener.

[On why he runs away] This is my thought process. If a girl likes me, then there must be something really fucked up with her mind.

[On the Lady Shri Ram College] LSR is a girls' school. So when you search for pictures on Google you get a lot of funny things.

[Me: How do you know 'creampie' ah?] [20 year old girl] General knowledge lah!

[Me: Does she have a beau already?] *Incomprehension* [Me: A paramour?] *Continued incomprehension* [Me: A romantic interest?] *Comprehension*

[On a Jap girl] She walks like a local girl... [Me: How do Japanese girls walk? More demurely.

Your greatest responsibility in life is to make things better for your kids than they were for you

See, that's the problem with being a guy. You don't even know what a girl means when she says 'no' these days

[Me: Why is playwriting under EN and not TS?] I don't know. Because Theatre people are shit.

I should have worn heels... This skirt need heels. It's too long. [Me: Then short skirt no need heels?] Short skirt plus heels is skanky. Your parents never teach you ah?

[Me: Are you going to pay me back on the spot?] Yeah. But not in cash... [Me: Then in services?]

Most girls don't have any sort of career ambitions... Most of my friends just want to get married and be happy

Filipino girls will do anything in bed. That's why all the Caucasian men -

[Me: I am bigger than you] Confirmed. [Me: You used to be bigger] That was in uni. Then I lost a lot of weight. I'm sorry. [Me: Why're you apologising to me?] I don't know

没有男的 in our group. 好的 taken 了. 烂的不见了.

[On his wedding] We're inviting mostly students, so we don't expect angbaos [Someone: Thanks for the hint]

No Lady Gaga on a wedding day.

There're only 3 guys [who're going to be there] [Me: Men like women, women like women] Nobody likes guys

[Me: I told people, the next time, racial harmony day, I'll come in a loincloth] No, you're not wearing a loincloth to our wedding

[On a SMS] 'How to say "happy birthday" in German' [Someone: Can't he Google it] [Me: Why don't you give him {the words for] 'fuck you']

Just had dessert, eat sambal?

[Someone on advocado being expensive: Why don't you ask your parents to bring some?] My parents' bag is reserved for instant noodles [Me: These Indonesians]

From her side, almost all of them are vegetarian... These food scientists

I'm starting to realise that all the eligible guys are either attached or married [Me: As a good economist you should know that markets tend to clear]

I met 2 pickpockets... [Someone: You said hi?]

[Me: You know that TWG is a scam right] It's a Singapore brand [Me: That's not why it's a scam]

[Me] The best gift you can give to your child - American citizenship

Did you have dinner? [Someone: I had salad] I'm sorry, that doesn't count as dinner

[Me: Is it true brown sugar is sweeter?] I don't go for minahs. [Me: Black sugar? White sugar?...] Girls outside Singapore are more mature... [In Singapore] whine whine whine

[On 'The Secret' Meetup] There are a lot of cheap lays... [Someone: You just have to tell them - 'yesterday I was thinking about...']

You're just trying to be a nice guy [Someone: I don't have to try. I am a nice guy]

You want tea?... You can have mine [Me: I do not feel like exchanging bodily fluids today] Let me know when you do

I think Frigid Girl is very interesting. Because she is so Frigid

I actually have a greater respect for New Media papers than Sociology papers. Anybody on the street can write a Sociology paper.

There's a reason it's called the Political Science department. It's all about politics.

More proof that Comment is free - because a lot of it is crap

"Love has no place in a lawyer's office." - Elizabeth Aston

***

By Singapore's high commissioner to the court of St. James's:

Singapore's policy keeps drugs at bay | Michael Teo | Comment is free | guardian.co.uk

The content is the usual expected party line, but here are some comments (from the first 50, at any rate):

russellhiggs: This article talks a lot about drug abusers. But what about all the drug users? The millions of ordinary people who simply enjoy choosing to chemically alter their consciousness with no problems.

AllyF: One model of society is a free, humane, civilised, liberal society, with consequences that include drug use and addition. Another model of society is a brutally repressive, micromanaged, stifling culture in which every transgression from an imposed norm of behaviour is criminalised and punished.

I despise this article and everything it represents.

Catch33: "Keep away from drugs, they're really harmful. It's for your own good".

"Or we'll murder you"

JimPress: This is staggeringly inappropriate. You might as well have Kim Jong-il boasting about the lack of crime in North Korea or Than Shwe telling us about the Burmese junta's robust line on shoplifting. Vile.

danjam: The UK has a cannabis usage of 8.2% and the Netherlands has a cannabis usage of 5.4%. The USA is around 12%. Maybe it's time for some sensible thinking.

Plutonian: Jesus H Christ - what the fuck is this article doing in the Guardian?

Mahoganyrush: Well Mr Teo, until you also include alcohol and tobacco (the two biggest killer drugs by far) in your drug policy with the same harsh punishment I can only accuse you of blatant stinking hypocrisy.

Chewtoy: Singapore is an anagram for Prison Age.


And one on the methodology Singapore uses to claim that drug abuse here is very low:

PGallahue: In his response to our original commentary of 18 May, Mr Teo makes a number of claims that warrant a response.

Mr Teo states that ‘Singapore has one of the lowest prevalence of drug abuse worldwide’. Singapore often makes this claim to justify its harsh drug laws. However the government does not make available any reliable data on drug use in country, making this statement impossible to be independently tested.

Earlier this year, the Reference Group to the United Nations on HIV and Injecting Drug Use found Singapore to be one of the only countries in Asia that did not have reliable data on rates of drug injecting among its population. When our organisation, the International Harm Reduction Association, compiled the Global State of Harm Reduction report, we likewise were unable to find any reliable data on drug injecting in the country.

In place of independently verifiable data, Mr Teo cites information found in the World Drug Report 2008, published by the UN Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC). However, rather than being independently produced, the estimates he refers to were provided by the government of Singapore itself.

As described by UNODC, its ‘Report is based on data obtained primarily from the annual reports questionnaire (ARQ) sent by Governments to UNODC’. Therefore, when Mr Teo cites the World Drug Report, he is in fact only citing the official data provided by the government of Singapore itself, rather than data independently produced by the UN. Indeed, UNODC admits that the vast disparity in data quality and collection methods between countries makes comparisons between countries of little value.

If in fact the evidence supported Mr Teo’s claims, we would suspect that the government would publish it. Their failure to do so certainly creates reasonable doubts as to the veracity of such claims, and whether they represent anything more than political ‘spin’ to try and justify a controversial and likely ineffectual policy.

Furthermore, Mr. Teo argues that the death penalty for certain drug offences does not contravene international law. This statement is at odds with the vast majority of United Nations bodies tasked with interpreting international law – including the UN Human Rights Committee, the Special Rapporteurs on torture and extrajudicial executions, among others.

While he cites the 46 countries that voted against the Moratorium on the Death Penalty in the UN General Assembly, that resolution applied to all crimes, including premeditated murder and terrorist offences. It was not a referendum on the mandatory death penalty for drug offences. In any case, the Moratorium was passed not once but twice by the UN General Assembly despite the objections of these countries.

Of those states that retain the death penalty in law, only 32 do so for drugs and most of those do not actually carry out such penalties, much less make capital punishment mandatory. Only about five percent of the world’s countries make impose mandatory capital punishment for drugs in both law and practice. As stated in our original commentary, in this sense Singapore is clearly on the fringe of international death penalty policy.

Finally Mr Teo also raises the issue of deterrence as a justification. However, in the Yong Vui Kong decision the court admitted that it would not be able to assess its effectiveness in preventing drug crimes. The Court of Appeals wrote, ‘It is not within the purview of this court to determine the efficacy or otherwise of the [mandatory death penalty] as a deterrent vis-à-vis the offence of drug trafficking.’ The court cited precedent for this position. In Ong Ah Chuan decision the Privy Council said, ‘Their Lordships would emphasise that in their judicial capacity they are in no way concerned with arguments for or against capital punishment or its efficacy as a deterrent to so evil and profitable a crime as trafficking in addictive drugs.’

Thus deterrence as a legal justification for the mandatory death penalty rings somewhat hollow.

In any case, the government of Singapore fails to publish detailed crime data, and data on executions it carries out, makes Mr Teo’s claims about the effectiveness of its policies impossible to test independently. In fact, drug offences of any kind are conspicuously absent from Singapore's official crime data. Given that Singapore's Central Narcotics Bureau regularly reports on major trafficking arrests on its website, this seems an odd omission.

As a result, the offence for which Yong Vui Kong has been sentenced to death does not appear as a crime in Singapore's crime statistics for the year of his arrest (or if it does it is hidden elsewhere, and not recorded as a drug offence).

Patrick Gallahue & Rick Lines

u r wt u wr - 6th June 2010

"On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good, and not quite all the time." - George Orwell

***

u r wt u wr:

- 'Men are like lava lamps. Nice to look at, but not very bright'
- 'Little Miss Jail ♥ Bait' (She was in her early 30s)
- 'You are my cup of tea'
- 'So worth it'
- 'I'm alone *lone figure with back to viewer*'
- 'Bikini girls are everywhere... but where are the guys?'
- 'You must be a angel from heaven'
- 'Body glove *something* the core'
- 'I will share my secret'
- 'Hot item'
- 'kiss me! before my boyfriend come back'
- 'Car wash fundraiser... $10... Ask me about our specials"
- 'I ♥ my boyfriend(s)'
- '*something* feel happy, so you'll feel happy'
- 'Easy come easy go'
- 'I am sexy by nature, Naughty by choice'
- 'If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?'
- 'I'd flirt *something* likes you'
- 'Am not evil just plain naughty'
- 'Falling in love. He is my boyfriend'
- 'Girl' (Must she remind people? Herself? Does she have a gender identity crisis?)
- 'Let's hug! ♥ No conflict'
- 'Yes, I'M here'
- 'Irresistible. Delectable'
- 'on't as
st get
ack coff' (She was wearing a jacket blocking the first and last letters of each line)
- 'Just me. Let's get steady'
- 'I can't help it that I'm young, rich and fabulous' (At least it didn't say she was pretty, so I couldn't say the T-shirt was definitely lying)
- '*something* with my friends *something* So cute'
- 'Dickies *many words*'