When you can't live without bananas

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Saturday, February 01, 2003


Pictures of Yechao at the "8 Mile Rap Battle":


I seem to be getting very few comments nowadays. I guess the novelty of my ranting finally wore off on everyone :)

More referrals because I don't watch TV:

anatomically correct females for Morrowind - How rare. Someone wants to depart from the stereotypes

fbt wah - They're so short they make you go "wah" because you can see the curves of people's butts.

Bad boys from Temasek Secondary - Nasty.

wipe out of cd pirates in Malaysian - Good lucky. They're all in cahoots with the police, you know.

jobs for the bored medic - Hahaha. Try IVing yourself. Or using alcohol pre-injection swabs to clean the floor. You can even use Printol to kill rats, like I did. The possibilities are endless.

Planescape: Torment dialogue transcript - Try http://torment.db-forge.com/unovel/html/

"army singlet" - I still haven't gotten down to writing "sucks" below "Army" on one of mine

Modern Artillery Calculations in Excel - Sophisticated, they are nowadays.

singapore mrt nuclear bunker - A secret use for them eh. Can't let this get out!

producing popiah skin singapore - ???

sketches of 5bx exercises - Ah, the day is coming soon when Google reindexes my blog and searches for army terms won't turn up this page anymore. Oh well.

chij katong convent - Aren't most branches of the franchise school similar?

KLIA empty losing - Aww. Ma-laysia Boleh!

pantyhose tudung - ??? Don't they use scarfs?

pyrex dildo - Erm.

natalie+morris singapore - She's so famous. I still remember her tapdancing at RGS Nite 2000.

"naked NSmen" - Why would ANYONE want to search for this? Just when I thought the human race couldn't get any more deprived...

What's wrong with Islam - Ho ho ho. I'm not an Islam hate site, so you won't find unreasoning denunciation here. Relative theology isn't my current interest though, so you'll have better luck elsewhere


"worst school uniform" - Definitely River Valley High School.

"chinese high"elf - wth?!

"muslim toilet habits" - Erm. They don't use toilet paper. They used a pipe.

"rgs yearbook 2002" - Don't have it, never seen it, not going to scan it. Too bad.
http://www3.sympatico.ca/ross.fraser/islam.htm - Interesting, if long. Few would have the stamina and interest to finish it. Even I have taken a few sessions to get to where am I, around 80% down the page.

Interesting material on surrogacy, male dominance and the ramifications of Allah being a male.

"The more a society divests women of social power, the more a surrogate submission seems to transform a potentially powerful man into a powerless virtual woman. Since God is conceived in such societies as male and powerful, and as identifying with men and their power, such a crushing of a man's masculinity seems virtually to be an attack on God. Hence reactions like the hadith "whenever a male mounts another male, the throne of God trembles.""
Now on my cupboard: Printouts of the demotivational posters for Stupidity, Mistakes, Defeat and Procrastination. Yeh!

I put my Pokka Mango Tea in the freezer and after a while it began to taste of Mutton. Argh.

"Chew Huijun. Ontario, Canada" wrote in to the forum on being retained in JC. Apparently she got lots of notice from this, her second letter. It was rather well written, really.

I wonder why, since the RI days, people have liked to touch my stomach. I asked a few of them and some of them claim that it's for "good luck". Bah. Furthermore, from my observations and enquiries, I've found that other fat people don't get their stomachs fondled as much as mine is - indeed, their tums are not molested at all. I wonder if I should be flattered by the attention. In a semi-related issue, it seems much of my company thinks that I am... cute, especially some clerks and drivers. I am rather incredulous at the attention.

The sadistic SMRT people have outdone themselves! This time they played, "The train at Platform A is not for passenger service. Please do not board it. Thank You" (all said in an insincere voice) 4 times, 3 of them without pause. I wouldn't be surprised to hear of cases of "train rage" sometime soon.

The horror that is Chingay is here! In recent years, it has mutated horribly until most parts of it would be unrecognisable to its original organisers. Supposedly, it's meant to be just a street parade, but some of the items included in it are very odd. I still remember 1998, when the Chingay Parade featured Santa Claus on his float, as well as the Disneyfest team.

Bust enhancement ads, promising increased self-confidence and affection from your spouse, continue to crowd the pages of the Straits Times. I wonder if penile enhancement ads are illegal - I never see any!

There was this really freaky trailer which featured a row of old women (at least in their 50s) prancing about in CHIJ uniforms. AHHHH!

Seen on Ripley's Believe It Or Not:
- A couple which keeps 9 pigs at home. I'd like to keep one pig, but nine?
- A guy who can throw playing cards a distance of 210 feet, and threw one into a watermelon, where it was embedded. So Cool's flying cards in A Conman In Tokyo aren't entirely a flight of fancy!

Amusing news:
- Apparently Tung Chee Hwa was told to play Simcity4 to learn how to manage an economy.

After duty, I went back to RJ to have a look.

Very few J4s were there - I saw Paradox and Christopher Lim and one or two others, but that was about all. There were more J3s of course. The baseball caps some of the guys wore look really daft - it draws more attention to their baldness.

The theory of RJ people still holds true. Especially for Raffles Guys. The yearly trend is not being reversed. I shudder to think of the situation in 10 years time.

My RJ bears, courtesy of Screwed Up Girl, are quite nice. They're slightly different from the prototypes that I saw last year, but overall the reproduction of the uniforms is quite faithful. Even the purple colour, though it's been toned down a little.

Probably to "promote racial harmony", there were Indian and Malay dance items too this year. Intriguing, if irrelevant. The Japanese club made an appearance, of course. They finally have a male member!

Crystal informed me that the ban on Hot Socks has been lifted. Hoorah for Ankle Socks. Everyone must be very happy now (including her). And perhaps taking after Killer, she had a band (friendship band?) on one of her ankles. I *must* get down to finding out what those bands are for.

I saw more tudungs. I don't recall seeing any last year.


[Motivational Poster] Coversation means being able to disagree and still continue with the conversation (?)

[To me on RJ] Your legacy is slowly fading

Larder Suction Unit (Laerdal)

[Me: Isn't your name pronounced 'Evan'?] Yah. [Me: So why does everyone call you 'Ivan'?] Can't be helped

[On Asian Prince] He looks like an Indian. [Someone: I think it's the moustache]

[On the name of the new company] P? Pussy.

Why the hell do you need to go to asianprince.com when you have one sitting right here?

[Safety poster] Safety is everyday. It doesn't have a holiday (???)

[Me: Where's BSO? I haven't seen him for a long time] He's on course. [Me: What course is he on?] Intercourse

Gabriel, you're looking more and more like David Liew everyday

Quotes from Timothy:
You used to irritate only 2 classes of people: Teachers and Tim.

[The] Angklung: Malaysia's answer to the handbell... One whole row of people with Mahathir in the centre.

When the French write music about young girls, it sounds very nice

[On where The Associate went] Maybe he's selling prawn mee

I don't have a very good impression of SCGS girls

I asked you a very long time ago. What can change the nature of... No, I didn't ask you that.

[On an email] Gabriel Seah. No subject. Probably a picture of a horse.

I don't celebrate people's birthdays unless they're in August. I make an exception for my girlfriend.
More disturbing books: Planet Earth 2000 AD by Hal Lindsey.

This book is one in a long line of publications authored by a Right Wing Christian Fundamentalist. It is very biased and one sided, and reads like a bible of the Militant Right. Even a cursory browse through the pages would make the browser think that the author was deluded, had a persecution complex, and was an avid conspiracy theorist, justifying his far out predictions with selective and creative interpretation of Biblical text. Several blurbs on the back cover of the book praise the book, but they are not accredited to anyone. Perhaps they are quotes from Hal Linsey himself, praising his book.

The author deals with many issues. Among them is the state of Israel. He views it as the centre of the world and asks how Israel could survive the relentless barrage of Arab attacks besides divine intervention. He neglects to mention that Israel receives a large share of America's foreign aid, indeed it is the largest single recipient, thanks to the efforts of the Jewish lobby, and the disunity among the Arab nations that prevents them from forming a united and cohesive front against Israel.

The book laments the secularisation of the USA when in fact there is much evidence that the reverse is happening. The spirit of the 60s is attributed to demonic inspiration. The campaign against nuclear weapons is alleged to be bankrolled by communists. The Second Coming is proclaimed to be at nigh. I don't know about that, but such has been trumpeted many times before, all to no end.

Demonised are many groups. Among them, Communists, Muslims, Humanists, European integrationists, Liberals, non-fundamentalist Christians, and the left in general. Perhaps the only group free of sin are the Right Wing Fundamentalist Christians. What a coincidence. Satanism is equated with the rise in secularism, relativism, humanism and New Age Philosophies, so maybe in the future all of us will become satanists. With selective examples, the author makes his case that Christians are being persecuted, but he says nothing about how radical Christians are persecuting Muslims, supporters of abortion, multilateralists and more.

People trying to make the world a better place by raising the public's self-esteem and its ability to solve conflict (now how is that an unworthy cause?) are criticised, as are shows of religious tolerance, consisting merely of representatives of different religions gathering peaceably. Somehow, the United Nations is transformed into a World Government, promoting New Age religions. Boutros Boutros-Ghali is proclaimed to be the most powerful man on the planet (in 1996), and the US is 'pliant' to the UN. I believe any casual observer would be able to see that the UN Secretary-General has little power compared to the President of the United States, and if anything, it is the US that bullies the UN by refusing to pay its dues, imposing all sorts of conditions on it, stomping out of UN bodies like a petulant child, manipulating the Security Council and more. Hal Lindsey is upset that US soldiers are placed under foreign commanders in UN operations, but he conveniently neglects to mention how soldiers from other countries were under US command in Korea and the first Gulf War.

Many of Hal Lindsey's far out conspiracy theories are putatively proven and corroborated, not only with selective and creative interpretation of Scripture, but by way of his unnamed "primary intelligence sources", which are constantly referred to but never described in any but the vaguest of terms, and which know of some very unbelievable things, like Rafsanjani's proclaiming that Muslims want to take over the world.

Other conspiracy or far fetched theories:
- The world is moving towards a global government
- The EU is going to become a super-state and the Anti-Christ will head it
- The World Bank forces sterilisation and abortion
- UFOs are demons
- Holding land privately (as opposed to publicly) is good for the environment because it lowers the occurence of deforestation. The effects of logging and clearing the forests for agricultural or industrial use are conveniently ignored. He claims that the Bald Eagle is endangered because it lives on lands protected by the government. I can't believe even he can believe that this argument holds any water.

There are many more lies, half-truths, misleading arguments and distortions in his book, but to tackle all of them would take the whole day. He seems to be turning a religion of Love into one of Hate.

I wonder if he's been eating Magic Mushrooms.
Before I myself get down to slamming his right wing, Christian fundamentalist lies myself:

Hal Lindsey (b. 1929) The Father of Apocalyptic Christian Zionism

"His popularity may also in part, however, have to do with his tendency to revise those predictions in the light of changing world events. So for example The Final Battle (1994) is essentially an unacknowledged rewrite of the 'Late Great Planet Earth' (1970); 'Apocalypse Code' (1997) is a rewrite of 'There's a New World Coming' (1973); and 'Planet Earth 2000 A.D.' (1994, & 1996) are both revisions of 'The 1980's Countdown to Armageddon' (1980). Planet Earth: The Final Chapter (1998) is, the latest version in the 'Planet Earth' series.

A good example of Lindsey's prophetic revisions concerns the future of the United States. In Planet Earth 2000 A.D. Lindsey specifically draws attention to a prophecy made in The Late Great Planet Earth as evidence of his prophetic accuracy. A comparison, however, shows that he has edited out the prediction of communist subversion which did not occur.

Without access to all Lindsey's books one would not necessarily be aware that he has adapted his material to fit the changing world since he rarely acknowledges his sources or uses footnotes. The Introduction to two of his books serves as a good example. Reading Planet Earth 2000 A.D. (1994), one is led to believe this, and not 1980's Countdown to Armageddon (1981), was the long awaited sequel to The Late Great Planet Earth (1970).

Lindsey also makes use of previously published material in his later books. Unattributed paragraphs and sentences from earlier works reappear with regularity. So for example, in two unrelated books, published just a year apart, the same sentences are repeated.

Like a sinking ship, Lindsey portrays a world in which there is no hope or purpose, other than trying to get off as quickly as possible. There is therefore no point in trying to care for the world or getting involved in charitable or humanitarian work. Every human tragedy, be it earthquake, hurricane or war merely adds to the mounting evidence and proves his contention that the end of the world is nigh.

Throughout his books, but increasingly in the latter editions, Lindsey denigrates Arabs generally and Palestinians, in particular. He appears to show little understanding or compassion for their plight. Instead he offers a novel reinterpretation of the events of 1948.

... for thirty years, making detailed predictions about this 'someone', supposedly alive today, Lindsey is still unable to identify the anti-Christ.

Lindsey's particular kind of reading of history, coloured by a literal exegesis of highly selective biblical scriptures, is essentially polarised, dualistic, racist and confrontational. He justifies the continued demonisation of Russia, China, Islam and the Arab nations; he encourages the continued military and economic funding of Israel by the United States; he urges Israelis to resist negotiating land for peace and instead, maintain their apartheid policies, settling and incorporating the Occupied Territories within the State of Israel; and he incites fundamentalist groups committed to destroying the Dome of the Rock and rebuilding the Jewish Temple. In so doing Lindsey identifies unconditionally with the political as well as religious far right both in the United States as well as in Israel. Ironically, as the 'father' of 'armageddon theology' his attempts to defend Israel and to refute anti-Semitism may actually be leading to the very holocaust he abhors but repeatedly predicts."

Hal Lindsey’s Prophetic Jigsaw Puzzle: Five Predictions that Failed!

Hal Lindsey’s books on end-time prophecies are selling by the millions at a rate usually associated with hamburgers. His jigsaw puzzle approach turns Biblical prophecies into a crystal ball through which he predicts with astonishing boldness the precise pattern of events which were supposed to occur by the end of the 1980s - the time when the present history of this world was supposed to end.

Maybe I'll move on to Hindu fundamentalists next!
Something from the XS05A mailing list:

Sing along to the tune of "if you're happy and you know it"


If we cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets hurt your Mama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are Saudi
And the bank takes back your Audi
And the TV shows are bawdy, Bomb Iraq.

If the corporate scandals growin', bomb Iraq.
And your ties to them are showin', bomb Iraq.
If the smoking gun ain't smokin' We don't care, and we're not jokin'.
That Saddam will soon be croakin', Bomb Iraq.

Even if we have no allies, bomb Iraq.
From the sand dunes to the valleys, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections;
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions, Bomb Iraq.

While the globe is slowly warming, bomb Iraq.
Yay! the clouds of war are storming, bomb Iraq.
If the ozone hole is growing,
Some things we prefer not knowing.
Though our ignorance is showing, Bomb Iraq.

So here's one for dear old daddy, bomb Iraq,
From his favorite little laddy, bomb Iraq.
Saying no would look like treason.
It's the Hussein hunting season.
Even if we have no reason, Bomb Iraq.

By using local air temperature, precipitation, relative humidity, and drought/soil conditions, we can forecast mosquito activity throughout the U.S. This valuable information will help you limit your exposure to these nasty flying pests. The convenient 3-week forecast is updated weekly and predicts your probability of being bitten.


Enter two search terms and see which one is the most popular (on the Internet at least.)
Testing, testing: 1, 2, 3.

Hmm http://www.pyxz.com/ seems to be the only non-severely-crippled free image hosting site left.

The interface is irritating, though possibly powerful and they rename my files with weird numbers. Its 25 files limit is not bad though.

Friday, January 31, 2003

Haha Tim is so amusing. Since he's learning Malay, he decided to show me these sites:

Drill commands:

ACS page

Bedok Town Secondary School page


Sizing command:

"Yang tigi kekanan renda kekiri dalam satu barisan paras

dari kanan berdua bilang

nombor gangil satu langka kehadapan,
nombor genap satu langka keblakan, gerak

orang yang di sembilang kekenan diam
nombor gangil pu seng kanan
nombor genap pu seng kiri
squad kekanan dan kekiri pu seng

jedikan tiga barisan cepat jalan"

And I finally know how to spell: Untop Di-perrksa Tatang Senjata. And "Lepaskan Sepering" (So that's how Malays spell "spring".

This is so dumb. Why can't we use English?

Too bad there's nothing about masek masek.

Oh, and there's an exam for this kind of stuff. Sample question:

"2002 KL Battalion Senior Section Drill Competition Sequence
(Commander marches in the squad to the center of the drill ground)
Selamat petang, tuan. Pasukan kawad ____(if applicable) dari Kompeni ____________ telah siap sedia untuk bertanding. Minta kebenaran untuk manjalankan tugas, tuan.
(Upon approval) Terima kasih, tuan.
1. Tanda Penanda.
2. Senang diri.
3. Yang tinggi ke kanan, rendah ke kiri, dalam satu barisan paras.
4. Dari kanan berdua bilang.
5. Nombor-nombor ganjil satu langkah ke hadapan, nombor-nombor genap satu langkah ke belakang gerak
6. Orang yang di sebelah kanan sekali diam. Nombor ganjil ke kanan, nombor genap ke kiri, barisan ke kanan dan ke kiri pusing.
7. Jadikan tiga barisan cepat jalan.
8. Skuad sedia.
9. Lurus, ke kanan lurus.
10. Pandang depan.
11. Empat langkah ke sebelah kanan gerak.
12. Dua langkah ke belakang gerak.
13. Bergerak ke kanan, bertiga-tiga, ke kanan pusing.
14. Bergerak ke kiri, bertiga-tiga, ke belakang pusing.
15. Skuad akan menghadap ke belakang, ke kiri pusing.
16. Bergerak ke kanan, bertiga-tiga, ke kiri pusing.
17. Dari kiri cepat jalan.
18. Bergerak ke kiri, bertiga-tiga, ke belakang pusing.
19. Hormat ke kanan, hormat.
20. Skuad akan menghadap ke belakang, ke kiri pusing.
21. Bergerak ke kanan, bertiga-tiga, ke kiri pusing.
22. Tukar langkah jalan perlahan, perlahan jalan.
23. Tukar langkah semasa berjalan, tukar langkah… tukar langkah… tukar langkah
24. Bergerak ke kiri, bertiga-tiga, ke belakang pusing.
25. Skuad akan menghadap ke hadapan, ke kanan pusing.
26. Tukar langkah jalan cepat, cepat jalan.
27. Hormat ke hadapan, hormat.
28. Bergerak ke kanan, bertiga-tiga, ke kiri pusing.
29. Dari kiri, tukar haluan ke kiri, ke kiri belok.
30. Di sebelah kiri, jadikan skuad.
31. Skuad berhenti.
32. Lurus, ke kanan lurus.
33. Pandang depan. Diam

Fall out
Selamat petang, tuan. Saya dari pasukan kawad ____(if applicable) dari Kompeni ____________ telah selesai menjalankan tugas. Minta kebenaran untuk keluar dari padang kawad, tuan.
(Upon approval) Terima kasih, tuan."

Malay (Phonetic)

Anak haram


Amput puki babi

Amput puki anjing


Puki mak

Saya mahu amput mama kau

Isap telur

Butu, Konek or Peler


Chin hooi




Jilat puki

Perempuan sundal

Tet tet

Ancak or Melancap

English Translation



Fuck a pig's cunt

Fuck a dog's cunt


Fuck your mother

I want to fuck your mom

Suck my balls




Dumb ass


Whore house

Lick my pussy

Horny chick



Above from an amusing site - How to insult, swear and curse in 67 languages! Though I *still* don't know what nabeh / nah beh / na beh means.
Stuff from He Who Must Not Be Named:

Marching Orders
Goose-stepping, the dance craze of tyrants

Dobby, Putin: Separated at Birth?
I feel so tired.

Sickbay beds really don't provide a refreshing night's rest.

Comments received:

"I'll also like to point out a factual inaccuracy on your site. Chong Yechao did take part in the 8 mile rap battle, and was one of the finalists. However, none of the other finalists were malay. One was Canadia, another chinese and the last guy, indian. Yechao also made a fool of himself (his rap blows / he should have stayed at home yo) but mad props for having the balls to do so infront of a gangster crowd (well uh not really but the ppl up front weren't too happy with his clowning around)."


"ImageMagician has grown tremendously over the past year, and it has been our pleasure to provide free image hosting to all of our members. On January 19th, 2003, ImageMagician.com introduced a two-week trial system which is effective on all accounts. The goal of the two-week trial system is to allow you to decide if ImageMagician fulfills your hosting needs. If you should decide to stay with ImageMagician, you can become a supporting member for an entire year for only $9.99. That is less than 85 cents a month! You can learn about all the available membership packages by visiting http://www.imagemagician.com/hosting.html - We accept credit cards through PayPal.com, as well as money orders and personal checks."

... Searches for a good free alternative have found nothing. Maybe I will have to dish out moola this time. Damn.

Thursday, January 30, 2003

Johann Loh is currently languishing in the SAF Ward at AH now.

Poor guy. Unless he's faking it.

Maybe I will visit him at Alexandra Hospital soon :)

Tuesday, January 28, 2003

Apparently Mr Ong was at the Commissioning Parade. Ooh!

Because of the Nike ad (yeah, it's always an ad), the song "Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life" (from Monty Python's Life of Brian) has become quite popular recently, but I wonder if most people know the story behind, and the context in which this song was sung.

Quite amusing, really :)

Review of "Life of Brian":

"Review by Andrew Hicks
2 stars out of 4

I've heard this movie condemned as one of the most blasphemous pieces of Satanic filth ever put on celluloid. I'd say it's just not that funny. When you're taking on the dominant religion of your culture, you'd better have some pretty dynamite material, but that can't be said when the funniest part of the movie has your "chosen one" singing "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" while being crucified."

Pretty morbid stuff!

The Spam Letters

Humorous replies one person sends to spammers' mails.

I haven't seen many, but the ones about the Nigerian cons are funny:

"Subject: Re: confidentaility
To: hamza kalu
From: Jonathan Land
Date: 08/08/2001

Jonathan Land,

If you disturb me again i will use african vodoo agaainst you. You will loose your manhood and may die infact i am looking at you now from a calabash of water and wondering if i should strike you dead but i see a girl an innocent girl, her spirit is strong i will let you pass this time.



You're the funniest fucker in the world. I'd like to see your African Voodoo against my American Technology. I'm a top muckity-muck in the Department Of Defense. I'll have a Smart Bomb in your lap faster than you can play Hot Potato with it. They'll be picking those voodoo pins out of the remnants of your ass right up until the funeral.

So seriously, I'm not a cop or anything:

a) Are you even remotely near Nigeria?
b) How many people do you send emails like this out to, and how many actually fall for it?
c) Why did you keep writing back to me when I was obviously yanking you harder than a wood chipper? I could imagine that you deal with a lot of humorless folks in this line of work, and I might be a breath of fresh air.

Essentially, I'm really curious... how well has this racket worked for you?

According to this site: http://home.rica.net/alphae/419coal/ the scam you're running is actually a major industry in Nigeria, so I guess it's going well.


Girls without panties slip into the groove

By Cheryl Chow
Contributing Writer

January 10, 2003

Take a look around you. Do you see (or not see) how the young women have taken to prancing around the streets of Tokyo braless and pantiless --- and in the privacy of their own homes, buck naked. Or at least according to Spa! (1/14) which can be counted on to maintain the highest journalistic standards of objectivity by accosting nubile maidens and asking them point blank, "Are you wearing any undies?" According to a fashion writer, last summer, three out of ten replied in the negative.

And what's with these dames? Don't they feel any shame? Spa! ferrets out their reasons, however lame. All sorts of benefits were claimed, ranging from boosting creativity to busting the blues.

Take 25-year-old cartoonist Tomoko who wears neither bra nor panty, and regularly spends time naked at home. Ever cool and professional, she'll make statements like, "Yes, the composition here needs to be simplified." But she'll secretly add a tag line, "Yeah, but I ain't wearing panties today." And it gives her an odd sense of pleasure. When she's at a loss for ideas, she knows it's time for her to strip. She swears that it vastly increases her work output. Doesn't it also give her a sense of sexual excitement? asks Spa! Absolutely not, Tomoko scoffs.

But others beg to differ. A 24-year-old likens it to masturbation. "It's thrilling," she titters. "When I go to the convenience store without wearing panties, I get a charge by repeating to myself, 'I'm not wearing panties now, I'm flipping through mags and I'm not wearing panties, I'm getting out change and I'm not wearing panties.'"

Keiko, a 29-year-old, also enjoys the mild sexual titillation. She's been at this for 16 years since high school. Her only regret is that she didn't start -- or rather, stop -- sooner. Today, she goes pantiless to the office twice a week. If she drops something on the floor, she teases the men by bending down so that she almost -- but not quite -- exposes her secret. "It's exciting, my body gets so hot," she trills. She also enjoys taking pictures of herself in the buff. Once she had to report to the office on a Saturday when no one else was there, so she stripped and snapped pictures of herself nude.

She's married today, but the so-called expose continues. Matter of fact, she and hubby like to be naked at home. Sanae, another believer in less is more, recommends going naked for couples who want to experience feelings of security, devotion and happiness. For her, removing her undergarments has been absolutely "healing."

Healing? My ass! chortles gynecologist Dr. Ikuko Ikeshita. She eloquently speaks out against the dangers of getting a chill from over-exposure. She warns that it can lead to stiff shoulders, bloating, disturbance of the parasympathetic nervous system, menstrual irregularity, cramps, fatigue, listlessness -- and should these symptoms continue, they can lead to major depression. Not to mention that it's uncouth from a hygienic point of view. As she explains to Spa!, vaginal discharge functions as a barrier against bacteria. Thus, if a woman leaves her genitals exposed, she'll experience an increase in discharge.

So, are these maidens masochists, narcissists or exhibitionists? None of the above, concludes Spa! They're just girls yearning to be the heroine of their own stories, a drama that doesn't require talent, hard work, or even good looks. What a seductive, utterly under-rated, undie-less pleasure.


WaiWai stories are transcriptions of articles that originally appeared in Japanese language publications. The Mainichi Daily News cannot be held responsible for the contents of the original articles, nor does it guarantee their accuracy. Views expressed in the WaiWai column are not necessarily those held by the Mainichi Daily News or Mainichi Newspapers Co.

Monday, January 27, 2003


Sunday, January 26, 2003

Slamming of Slander: Liberal Lies About the American Right by Ann H. Coulter (one of the top items in Amazon.com's most popular wishlist items):

"Liberals have been wrong about everything in the last half century," writes conservative pundit Ann Coulter, author of the bestselling anti-Clinton tome High Crimes and Misdemeanors. They've been especially wrong about Republicans, she writes. The bulk of Slander, in fact, is a well-documented brief dedicated to the proposition that most of the media despises anybody whose political opinions lie an inch to the right of the New York Times editorial page. This is hardly an original observation, though few have presented it with such verve. Coulter is the shock-jock of right-wing political commentary, able to dash off page after page of over-the-top but hilarious one-liners: "Liberals dispute slight reductions in the marginal tax rates as if they are trying to prevent Charles Manson from slaughtering baby seals." There's a certain amount of irony about an author who says "liberals prefer invective to engagement" also declaring, "The good part of being a Democrat is that you can commit crimes, sell out your base, bomb foreigners, and rape women, and the Democratic faithful will still think you're the greatest." But then carefully measured criticism never has been Coulter's shtick--or her appeal. Fans of Rush Limbaugh and admirers of Bernard Goldberg's Bias won't want to miss Slander. --John Miller

For those who don't know Ann Coulter, she is one of those blond, right-wing, talking heads who pop up on cable--the most outspoken one. "We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity," she remarked after the terrorist attacks. She is no easier on liberals, on whom she blames, well, just about everything: "The liberal catechism includes a hatred of Christians, guns, the profit motive and political speech." Page after page of invective follows: "In radical Islam liberals finally found a religion they could respect." The diatribe (complete with footnotes when she's quoting liberals) continues through discussions of the liberal press, the "apocryphal" religious right, and liberals' inability to engage in ideas, only name-calling(!). Sometimes she makes a valid point. She's exactly right about the way the media criticizes women because of their looks. She neglects to mention, though, that this criticism is not restricted to Republican women such as Linda Tripp. Just ask Hillary Clinton. Coulter tries very hard to be incendiary, but she comes across as merely tedious. Although she claims liberals run the press, she'll no doubt turn up on many right-wing call-in shows, among other venues, so a buy a copy. Ilene Cooper

"oh saw the faculty cheerleading during dance today. it's like..i dunno.. amateur cheerleading..and ultra bimbotic. only saw the cps pple though..damn a lot of screams and shrieks *rolls eyes* and i can't stand that look on their faces when they dance..they gave me the impression that they think they're blardee chio or sth. give me a break. there are only two dancers from arts fac in the j1 batch. like wth. so i don't expect arts fac cheerleading to be good...

as much as i love rj..there are some things about rjc which i find particularly annoying.

1. too many poseurs. i dunno why..but pple seem to hang out at the canteen..just to be watched. haha. and i find the 'rugby table' especially distasteful. baaah.

2. too windy. ok firstly...wind is contact lens' biggest enemy. i gotta keep blinking to keep my contacts in place. difficult to describe the level of discomfort..you'll understand if you wear contacts. and i look retarded if i keep blinking. yea. and the other problem about rj being too windy is that it's hard to keep your pinafore tamed. haha. i saw david while walking towards the canteen today. i was sort of holding on to my pinafore at first. but i waved. and my pinafore flew up in a *whoosh* i was like oops and tried to hold it down. dUh. hope i reacted fast enough. nothing exposed?"

Blog surfing is so amusing when you've nothing to do :) The dynamic youth are getting up to so much fun. No one wants to read about guard duty, otoh. Not that anyone seems to write about it.

Haha apparently Donald Rumsfeld called France and Germany 'the Axis of Weasels'. Lol.

"gabriel seah" - Hi, hello, how are you.

"causes of incest among malays" - Some UMNO guy postulated that people in PAS states had a higher incidence of incest because they were too deprived. Well. What can I say?

"tips + searching for porn on kazaA" - Everyone likes to use Kazaa to find porn.

"shoujo-yuri" - And now I'm getting hits for weird Japanese stuff. What's next? Tentacle porn?

"what common household items can a woman use to masterbate" - Someone really likes this. I keep getting this sort of hits.

Queen Rania nude pictures
Queen rania sex pics - Why is the Queen of Jordan so popular? I always get searches for her nude pictures.

"thaipusam ringtones" - I didn't know there were songs for, err, thaipusam.

"muslim + paedophile tendencies" - !? Well, Muhammad married a 9 year old.

"jin yong hero game download" - They make these?

"8 Mile+film+islam+Eminem" - He's offended half the world. Wouldn't be surprised if he offended Islam. I just hope he doesn't get a fatwa.

picturs of traffic lights
fmous volcanoes - Some people can't spell.

"what is trengganu roast beef" - What *is* trengganu roast beef?

"tekong training naked" - They're not that bad. Anymore. Half naked is probably the worse you get.

'"chinese high school" uniform' - Ooh. Uniform fetishes.

"bitchy scgs girls" - Hahaha. I wouldn't know.

"chong yechao" - Amazing how popular some people can get.

"Schoolgirls groped buses" - ???

"klcc sex" - Kuala Lumpur Convention Centre? Sex in a convention centre?

"singapore horny gals webpage" - I can imagine the page. "Hi. I'm a 16 year old Singaporean Schoolgirl. I've created this page in the off chance than 30 year old Singaporean men will find it and solicit me for unnamed activities".

"why fashion,clothes is banned in s'pore schools" - Because it causes people to be creative and have a sense of individuality :) Also, they want to see how low some people will go in their tolerance for bad school uniforms.

"cartoon pictures of lee kuan yew" - Don't get thrown into jail.

"SAF Commando" - Ho ho ho. I've nothing to say.

"scented pen" - Eeks. I hope they're not toxic.

"poetry coursework (not waving but drowning)" - ???

"can flat footed people get conscripted into the army?" - They sure can. I'm flat footed. So sad.

"Hindu Pushups Instructions" - What's a Hindu pushup?

"unicorn toy hello" - Argh! Not that foul abomination, that aberration, that offence against nature!

"quitters, singaporeans migrating overseas" - Bye bye.

Recently, "nude" surpassed "zaogeng" as the 2nd highest keyword for this site.

"girls" is still in 6th place, and in the top 50 we also have such hot favs as "sex", "acjc", "rjc", "rgs", "malay" (!!!), "shuqi" (my namesake is ever popular), "school", "uniform", "scgs", "ning", "baizura" and "gta3". Whee. People are very hot blooded.
This morning we had a run at East Coast. Qingru was there. He's being attached to my unit for 2 weeks for the last part of his course (and Melvin to 1SIR - haha!). I hope he goes to a better unit in the end (stayout!), though there *are* many worse places to be. Oh well, maybe I will be able to look forward to seeing more one face from old times in the future :)

I'm on excuse, so I was looking after the bags while most others went for a short but invigorating run.

I felt like a change, so I wore my JC shorts, only to get scolded by Patrick for being 'hao lian'. Bah. Anyway there was one other person I saw wearing RJ shorts, so I wasn't alone.

There was this VJ girl cycling, presumably to school. In her school uniform. It was quite an eye opener (and rather amusing too), seeing someone cycle in an A-line skirt. I never thought it possible. Later, there was this quite handsome guy rollerblading while topless and looking very happy. Except that he was balding, so.

Across the path from where me and some people were taking care of the bags, there was this circle of senior citizens engaging in some odd activities. They laughed while gesticulating every now and then, and then started clapping a rhythm regularly. The games reminded me of those that babies play. Me and those people with me were quite freaked out, really.

I was invited to today's commissioning, so I got to see the hundreds of officer cadets displaying their drill skills and listening to the MC, some lian woman who didn't speak very well and had an irritating voice, while enjoying the company of 2 of Yucheng's JC classmates, including "King" Zhuobin.

My favourite pioneer left even before the President had arrived. Gah.

Some girl behind us asked why the drill commands were in Malay when most Singaporeans didn't understand Malay. Her companion said it was corruption. Huh?

I found out what "Munnoru Valliea" (or however you spell it) means - it's about brave young men. I should've guessed. Surprisingly, the Officer Cadets in Training pronounced the words very accurately - they sounded like real Indians singing. However, musically, they still fall short - they kept rushing the National Anthem and mispronounced some parts.

It was amusing, and somewhat comforting, to see that even Officer Cadets don't have perfect drill :)

The contingent commander of one Navy contingent didn't buckle his scabbard on properly, and partway through the parade, we could see it dangling and dragging on the floor as he marched along. Oh, the horror. But it wasn't as funny as the navy cadets in white pants and white shoes, which has always made them look goofy.

The way they arranged the female cadets was rather funny. The backline of one contingent was arranged such: tall, short, tall, short, tall, short, tall, not-so-short (male and female alternately)

For some reason, the Armour Officers were special - instead of wearing the funny Number 1 Uniform's Hat, they wore their black berets. Meh.

At one point, they got the leaders of "the eight major religious faiths" to bless the Officer Cadets. I thought this was supposed to be a secular society. I wonder what the atheists think about this travesty. Also, the 8 "major" faiths included Zoroastrianism and Baha'i, but not the Jewish faith. Bah.

Eugene Ng got the Sword of Honour for his Weapons System Officer course - yeh.

Kadir thought that Auld Lang Syne was the National Anthem. Doh! The song Auld Lang Syne, oddly enough, was listed as "OCS Farewell - L. Laini/Beethoven" on the program.

Yucheng gave the three of us red packets, and admonished us not to open them till we had reached the bus stop. My red packet felt very substantial, so I was suspicious. When we'd opened and compared our hong baos, we found that all of us got FHM cutouts. Gah. I didn't expect any less from him, really.

Some newly commissioned cadets eating at the post-parade Indian buffet dinner, together with the 2nd class guests. Maybe they were blacklisted, or they didn't have any dates for the ball and that was their punishment.

There was this feature on News Radio 93.8 about Islam's adapting to modernity and they interviewed several prominent academics and their views. All of them opined that the current interpretation as practiced by many Muslims is mired in the 7th Century and doesn't take into context the era's socio-political-cultural context. It was all very interesting, but don't people get sick of this sort of thing? It's been more than a year since 9/11 and the "let's understand Muslims" drives began. I'd think that every Tom, Dick and Harry would be an expert by now. If even *I* am tiring of this issue, I don't see why others aren't :)

Yaodong told me that he reads Balderdash. Hello Yaodong! Shawn writes about you too. You can go and read his "beautiful thoughts" too. His latest entry features you! There's also the ICQ log you forgot about, the time they wanted to dedicate a song to you, tales about your SIT test exploits, and more besides.

Everyone loves talking and writing about you.
More thoughts on "Why Do People Hate America?", after finishing it:

The book makes the point that ordinary Americans have little influence on American domestic and foreign policy and decries this. However, what isn't said is that this is the case in I daresay all countries. With the advent of Indirect Representation, the electorate no longer has the influence on the polity's behavior as it did under Direct Representation, as practiced in Classical Athens. Having ordinary people debate and vote on policy regularly is simply not feasible anymore - people have neither the time nor the interest (witness the <50% turnout in American elections and the low turnouts elsewhere) to do so, which is why we have systems of indirect representation. Besides, opinion polls do have some effect on governmental decision making - it would be suicidal to defy the will of the people all the time.

Some of the ideas advanced in the book seem rather far fetched and take some degree of imagination to conceive of. In addition, it intimates that the USA and the US people are simplistic and shallow. I know that there are many dumb Americans, but it isn't really fair to condemn an entire country and people just like that.

The central assumption that the book makes - that people *do* hate America, does seem rather extreme and unsubstantiated. Indeed, the book concludes that EVERYONE hates America, which is an unfair and untrue assertion.

The USA is not unique in thinking that it is a paragon. All powers, when they were pre-eminent (and many when they weren't, or never were), though themselves special, paramount or chosen in some way, though that doesn't exonerate America. Paradoxes and contradictions exist in all societies, and not just in the USA.

To be fair, the book does make many good points. For example, that of Americans treating violence as a form of communication - Timothy McVeigh bombed the Oklahoma City federal building to send a message, and people who passionately defend the right of the foetus to live can bomb abortion clinics and assassinate doctors who perform abortions in cold blood. However, I *am* critical by nature, and critics are supposed to criticise, so.
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