"The happiest place on earth"

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Friday, December 31, 2004

I critically analyse most parts of everyone's favourite "meaningful" / "reflective" verse, which in reality is a piece of trite crap, harkening back to a romanticised age which never did exist:

The paradox of our time
written by Bob Moorehead, pastor of Overlake Christian Church, who was accused by seventeen members of his congregation of sexually assaulting them

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; Dubious but disputable
Wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints; People are definitely less sexist, racist and homophobic now than half a century ago, and probably a decade ago.
We spend more, but have less; Depending on what you have less of - debatable.
We buy more, but enjoy it less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families; Thanks to lower infant mortality and women's emancipation, no less. Does anyone really want to live in a household with 10 children, the care of which no doubt will fall upon the women?
More conveniences, but less time; One is always able to make time, if one sacrifices income.
We have more degrees, but less sense; I agree. After all, 83% of Americans believe in the Virgin Birth but only 28% in evolution. Must be too many degrees in theology floating around.
More knowledge, but less judgment; Another gloriously nebulous statement which is hard to debunk (but also to assert, unless one is writing banal rubbish.
More experts, but more problems; Perhaps only because the problems were previously hidden. We could always go back to the Paleolithic where the only problems were of finding food and not dying from an animal attack.
More medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, And people didn't drink and smoke a lot in the past? Hah!
Spend too recklessly, laugh too little, Perhaps we seem to spend too recklessly because we have more to spend. Better to live in poverty and have to count every cent, I assume.
Drive too fast, get angry too quickly, As if aggression weren't a problem in the past. People just took it out on their wives/children.
Stay up too late, get up too tired, Perhaps because people have more fulfilling things to do at night, and we have artificial lighting?
Read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. I have no gods, so the last is not a problem for me *g*

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. Ah. Glorious talk of 'values'. Better to return to the racist, misogynistic days, I wager.
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. Bigotry has always been a part of humanity. It's just more obvious now since society is less homogeneous, so the perceived other is more obvious and threatening.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life;
We've added years to life, not life to years. A return to the days when people ate gruel and yearned to go to Sugarcandy mountain is preferable, presumably.

We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.
We've conquered outer space, but not inner space;
We've done larger things, but not better things. More meaningless statements.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul; What with? Liberalism?
We've split the atom, but not our prejudice. Perhaps not, but we've managed to wear it down, at least.

[Ed: After this point, I gave up labelling bland/meaningless assertions as what they were.]

We write more, but learn less;
We plan more, but accomplish less.
We've learned to rush, but not to wait;
We have higher incomes, but lower morals; Since morals are relative, how is this a problem
We have more food, but less appeasement;
We build more computers to hold more information to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication;
We've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion;
Tall men, and short character;
Steep profits, and shallow relationships.
These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare; Just because wife beating used to be suppressed does not mean that it did not exist. Conjugal harmony arising from female subjugation is not necessarily a good thing.
More leisure, but less fun;
More kinds of food, but less nutrition.

These are days of two incomes, but more divorce; Better to divorce than to live a marriage which is a sham, continued only for the sake of appearances.
Of fancier houses, but broken homes.
These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throw away morality, one-night stands,
overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer to quiet to kill. Better to let the mentally ill suffer, I assume.

It is a time when there is much in the show window and nothing in the stockroom;
A time when technology has brought this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to make a difference,
Or to just hit "Skip Ahead"... More bullshit wasting our bandwith. At least the Llama song is somewhat entertaining the first time.

[Addendum: The true paradox of our time in history is that we have more motivational and self-help books, but more unhappy and pathetic people.]
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