Shanghai/Hongkong 2007 Trip - Day 2, Part 1 - Shanghai: Walkabout, Museum

China Trip
Day 2 (24/6) - Shanghai: Walkabout, Museum, French Concession (Part 1)

Ed: The pictures in this post were restored in late December 2010 after Mediafire deleted my account in 2007. The two post titles are different for historical reasons (I have left the original title in bold while using a more useful one as the bona fide one)


Rough translation:
"Seven don'ts for city residents, and the seven things for them to work towards.
Don't: spit, jaywalk, litter, scold vulgarities or obscenities, despoil the environment, destroy public property [Ed: Since this is a Communist country, technically all property is public] or smoke in public.
Please: observe rules to build a law-abiding city, be hygienic to build a healthy city, care for your environs to build a green city, be polite to build a courteous city, be trustworthy to build a reliable/trustworthy city, love science/knowledge to build a learning city and practise free love to build a city full of fellowship."

I swear, the best thing about being conversant in (a form of) Chinese in China is that you get to read the propaganda posters.

An alternate translation by My Beloved Understudy:

"And from what i gather, the Don'ts:
Anyhow Spit (aim at your target before you spit), Anyhow Dash across the road (Take your time, otherwise will trip and fall), anyhow toss rubbish by the roadside (you can get some small change by selling to karang guni)

It's a literal translation...

more don'ts:
make vulgar or dirty statements
desecrate or damage natural objects (You can blow up man-made ones for all we care)
Damage public property (You can blow up all private property for all we care... wait, there shouldn't be 'private' property... they all belong to us!)
Smoke in public (Use a chimney instead)

and the objectives all citizens should look forward to:
Be vigilant and build a lawful city
Be hygienic and build a healthy city
Protect the environment and build a ?city of conscience?
Be respectful and build a courteous city

Be trustworthy and build a city based on trust (just leave your yuans at the city council)
Love science and build a city of knowledge (Communists really love knowledge, don't believe what you read elsewhere)
Be loving and compassionate and build a city of friends (We'll take care of the backstabbing for you)"

Most stuff in China is incredibly cheap - Made In China stuff is already quite cheap, but *Sold* In China stuff is even cheaper (proof that markets don't clear). For example a bottle of Coke can cost as little as 1.50 Yuan (30 Singapore cents).

Yucheng, Lin brought me for breakfast and the Wo Tie was like Xialongbao, with juice inside. The result being that I scalded myself. Gah.


I didn't expect there to be so many umbrellas. The locals are quite nua (there were some males using them also)


Nanjing Road


Fountain along Nanjing Road
The screen was showing a video celebrating the demolishing of the slums in preparation for Expo 2010, and showed people being happy at being resettled, pronouncing them happy that their shabby flats were gone. I'm sure no one consulted the resettled people in the making of that video.


Nanjing Road East


Large kids store


Shanghai No 1 Department Store
Yucheng: "The prices are also Number 1"


New World


Weird sculpture (IIRC it commemmorates a workers' uprising)


Random building


Country Club disguised as a toilet


Church


Raffles City (Capitaland)
In Singapore we transliterate it to Chinese as "莱佛士" (lai2 fo2 shi4). There, it became "莱福士" (lai2 fu2 shi4), evoking images of good fortune. Bah.


Man relac one corner-ing


Biscuit stall


People's Square


Shanghai Museum, "designed in the shape of an ancient, bronze, tripod cooking vessel called a ding."


Johnny Malkavian photographing

The girl at the ticket counter refused my NUS card because she said there was no expiry date on it, so I paid 20 yuan instead of 5. Gah.

I used the toilet in the museum and was very pissed off to find many globs of spit on the floor of my cubicle. I don't know what's wrong with these people - the toilet bowl is so near. On the other hand, there wasn't as much spitting in the street as I expected so maybe it was saving up.


Discriminaton against non-Chinese speakers


Dog on a leash

Besides the excellent permanent collection (which somehow escaped the Cultural Revolution), there was also an exhibition on "Art in America". Since it was spread out among 4 floors, I viewed American and Chinese art alternately.


No fountain pens allowed in the American art exhibition. Wth?!

US art cannot make it in general. For example "A peaceable kingdom with Quakers bearing banners" was very uhh. Although many genres were represented (even still life), religious art was notable for its absence - its place was probably replaced by works celebrating the American Mythos.

I saw a woman in a habit on an animal with a man leading her. At first I thought it was the Flight from Egypt, then I saw it was "Daniel Boone escorting settlers through the Cumberland Gap".

Sargent - A Parisian beggar girl, 1880 was blur but I could make out that she was in what looked like a dirty wedding dress, which confused me.

First was the bronzes collection. Many of the best works were probably not in China, but what was on display was already most impressive.


Wine vessel, Late Shang. 13th-11th century BC.


Food vessels. Early W. Zhou. 11th c. BC.


Ges (dagger-axes). Late Shang and Early W. Zhou.


Water vessel of Zi Zhong Jiang. Early Spring & Autumn period. 770-7th c. BC.


Bell with Dragon design. Late W. Zhou, Early 9th c. BC-771 BC.


Bells of Marquis Su of Jin. Mid 9th c. BC.


Elegant but stupid fire extinguisher case (only Chinese-speakers would know what was behind)


Ox-shaped wine vessel. Early 6th c. - 476 BC.


Wine vessel with dragon spout and animal rack. Early 7th - Early 6th c. BC.


Cowrie container with 8 yaks. W. Han, 208 BC - 8 AD.


Pillow with 5 Yaks. W, Han. 208 BC - 8 AD.


Statue of Lady. W. Han. 208 BC - 8 AD.


'Transparent' mirror.

They were very proud of it, giving it an extended writeup:


"The 'Transparent' mirror of the Western Han period can reflect an image; but when held to reflect a beam of strong light, it can throw onto a wall a magnifified image of the decorative pattern and inscription on its back. Apparently, as the cast bronze mirror cooled and became polished, stress set up in the metal gave it variable elasticity; resulting in a pattern of minute deformation which cannot be seen by the naked eye, corresponding to the decoration on the back of the mirror."


Appendage by burn-out casting. Wine vessel with cord-patterned handle. 13th-11th century.


Pottery dog. E. Han, 25 - 220 AD.


Maitreya Bodhisattva, stone. N. Wei. 386 - 534 AD.


Figure blowing bamboo flute, Figure playing lute. Pottery, E. Han. 25 - 220 AD.


Buddhist stone stele. N. Wei. 386 - 534.


Bodhisattva, gilt bronze. N. Wei. 501 AD.


Sakyamuni Buddha stone stele. W. Wei. 540 AD.


Sakyamuni Buddha gold-painted stone. 546 AD. Liang.


1000 buddha stone stele. N. Zhou. 557 - 81 AD.


Sakyamuni stone Buddha. N. Qi. 550 - 77 AD.


3 Amitabha bronze Buddhas. Sui. 581 - 618 AD.


Stone Bodhisattva. Tang. 618 - 907.


Lao Jun. Stone. Tang. 740 AD.


Stone amitabha Buddha. Tang. 723 AD.
Johnny Malkavian on photoshopping a finger onto this: 'If we do that, between the 2 of us we [will] have 3 of the world's largest religions coming after us'


Equestrian, Coloured pottery. Tang. 618 - 907 AD.


Head of Kasyapa. Wood. Tang. 618 - 907 AD.


Civil official, maid servant. Pottery. S. Tang, 943 AD.


Bodhisattva, gilt bronze. Tang. 618 - 907 AD.


Stone musicians. 5 dynasties. 907-60 AD.


Bodhisattva, painted and gilded wood. Song. 960-1279 AD.


Stone prince. Song. 960-1279 AD.


Stone reclining Buddha. Song. 960-1279 AD.


Gilt bronze Bodhisattva. Liao. 916-1125 AD.


Bodhisattva, gold painted wood. Jin. 1115-1234 AD.


Stone lokapala. 960-1279 AD.


Painted clay Bodhisattva. Song. 960-1279 AD.

I then went back to American art. I saw what was probably my first Jackson Pollock (No. 18, 1950), and it was hideous. This was probably why fountain pens were disallowed - to prevent pissed off people from vandalising the crap they had.

"Grrrrrrrrrrr!!", 1960 by Roy Lichtenstein looked familiar. I'd seen some of his works in Stanford.

"MTV is the lava lamp of the 1980's." - Doug Ferrari

***

Abdul:

I've got a room in Blk 16, PGP (good spot near the bus stop) and I'm looking for a swap with anyone in Ridge View or Kwok Foundation.

Benefits: Will chauffeur you from anywhere to PGP and help you move in. Other forms of compensation, including but not limited to monetary, can be discussed. Will also pay anyone who finds me a room swap. Spread the word!

On Male Genital Mutilation, and Problematising the Hysteric Rhetoric around Female Circumcision

"What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living." - Doug Larson

***

Me: after bukit timah hill my mother says I walk like I just got bersunat

Jabir on Male Genital Mutilation: um. a nicer word would be khatan
and usually people just say sunat

i wrote a eulogy to my foreskin on lj

don't rub it

i read that eulogy for a gay poetry event

it's a symbolic circumcision for girls. i hear they just prick it
it being the clitoris


幸福論 - on foreskins

"i remember the day it was cut away from me. i was all of 5 years old, in the prime of puerile innocence. it was a joyous event, relatives were called over, food and drink aplenty. i found company in my cousins, and whilst they served to diminish some amount of apprehension, i never totally forgot what the day was really about.

they had said it was for the better, that it was cleaner (and cleanliness is closer to godliness). everyone had to get it done, even the girls i had heard, though theirs was a quieter affair i never could find out much about, and no one questioned the logic of cleanliness. who wants to be dirty?

i had seen what it would look like. halim had showed his to me in the toilet, the year before. we were good friends then, and even went to the same cubicle during toilet breaks. i was always eager to examine it closely; it was so different from mine. the exposed bulbous head almost shiny and so smooth to touch, the inset rim before it joins the shaft a ring of gleaming red. there was a certain grandness about it, in stark contrast to my enclosed, pale brown one, and halim's seeming indifference (he had it done neonatally, without the fancy of ceremony) only served to fascinate me further. i would often toy with it then... but i digress.

yet beyond the aesthetic and rite-of-passage-esque ascension it would bestow, i knew it would hurt and it terrified me.

it was after lunch and there was still no sign of him. the doctor was late. given my disquiet, and not wanting to have to stop playing, this was immeasurable relief. i even managed to somehow convince myself that he wasn't coming after all, that it'd get postponed. or something.

but he came in the evening, i heard someone announcing it, and the announcement being echoed around. it came like a bolt, striking through my heart. i thought he wasn't coming anymore! i looked around, but not in time to catch him going up the stairs to prepare, in my parents' bedroom.

the surgery itself went by painlessly though. i was under local anaesthesia and awake the whole time, but lying down in preconceived terror, with a blur of faces around me under the bright fluorescent lights, i didn't know what was going on and felt nothing but a vague numbness down there, occasionally punctuated by further jabs as the anaesthesia wore off; it was a rather protracted affair.

i must have fallen asleep because i woke up alone in the darkness, the numbness still present. i was clad in a sarong and underneath was a wire coat hanger, bent into a sort of tripod, to avoid the any contact with the cloth. i was fine initially, but as the numbness wore off, an unbearable searing pain quickly rose up. bawling uncontrollably and trying to fight off the pain somehow, i couldn't sleep for most of the night. mother was beside for a while, but she went off to bed afterwards.

in the morning, the pain was still there, and as i would later find out, would not go away for a couple of weeks. i got out of bed very carefully, with mother's help, so as not to shift the tripod away, and then walking was awkward and difficult; i had to hold on to mother's hand for support, in both senses of the word. we walked, insofar as my gait could be considered walking, to the toilet. as i started to pee, a jolt of piercing pain shot through and i could not help a burst of tears and cry. i would most dread going to the toilet for some time, a painful and undignifying affair.

when it finally healed, the head had shriveled up a little. it didn't look as grand as halim's, or was that just my imagination, my delusions of penile grandeur? or maybe it was because we had different procedures, done at different ages? mine was done with a freehand scalpel method and took hours, whereas the common plastibell (link here, but not for the faint-hearted) or ross circumcision ring method would have taken only 10-12 minutes. might there have been some complication, perhaps? but i wouldn't know. and i didn't care much either. it was done, and the pain finally gone, leaving me only relief. in school, i would feel a bit more grown up than the other muslim boys who had not got it done yet, and enjoyed the attention i received while sharing with them my experience of the ordeal.

years later today, i was talking with a friend about foreskins and it dawns on me that i miss my foreskin. it was taken from me at an innocent, vulnerable age, and although there was no cruel intent, all the same, i feel deprived of it. foreskins are very useful. this page has a list of 18 of their functions, 9 of which are sexual. you can even keep contact lenses in them, if you want. i mean sure, you'd have to clean off smegma build-up all the time, but these things come into habit, like brushing your teeth or shampooing your hair, so it's of negligible loss of time, in the greater scheme of things. and what you get for it, are 18 functions you'd never get without it, and not to mention a complete body. i mean, think about it: it's like losing any other part of your body, like an arm or toe. the foreskin might be less important you say, but it's not so much about fuctionality (although i remind you i have lost 18 fuctions of my body) as simply losing something that so intimately belongs to you. and just because many men don't have foreskins too doesn't make you any more complete; just means many men are sadly deprived of their foreskins too.

so this entry i dedicate, in loving memory of my foreskin, wherever it may be."

***

Genital Cutting and Western Discourses on Sexuality, Kirsten Bell

"Despite my efforts to reveal the heterogeneity of the practices glossed as “male circumcision,” the relative equanimity of my students when they learned of these male surgeries was a striking contrast to their sense of outrage and indignation at the female operations. Although it is true that several of the students did perceive that operations such as subincision constitute a form of mutilation, there was little sense that it was of a sexual nature. Indeed, what was striking was how willing students were to relegate such practices to the realm of “culture,” and how unwilling they were to place female surgeries in the same realm. Importantly, the lack of equivalence many of my students perceived between male and female genital surgeries extended well beyond male circumcision and included an unwillingness to consider any form of male genital surgery in conjunction with the female operations. For the majority of students in the class, the only procedure that they considered at all equivalent to female circumcision was castration, or more than that, full frontal castration—a penectomy.

Students did not think that carving up male genitalia had any damaging effects on male sexuality as long as the penis remained largely intact. My students reasoned that as long as the man retained the ability to ejaculate, his sexuality was unimpaired. They were so ready to assert that female sexuality has been totally annihilated by genital surgery of any kind and so reluctant to proclaim that anything short of full frontal castration will affect a man’s sexuality in the same way, it seemed clear that something very interesting was being revealed. Importantly, their insistence seemed to have less to do with these practices themselves and more to do with underlying assumptions about the nature of female and male sexuality, assumptions echoed in the dominant discourses on genital cutting...

However, although the genital equation between clitoris and penis has now become central to the dominant discourses surrounding both male and female genital cutting, how valid are equations of this kind? Although it is important to recognize that second-wave feminists deployed the homology argument to subvert the original biomedical intent to diminish the clitoris (Moore and Clarke 1995:995), the ongoing tendency to define the clitoris as the female penis merely reinvokes androcentric notions of female sexuality first described centuries ago (see Laqueur 1999; Martin 1987). Male physiology is still taken as the norm, and female physiology is still understood in relation to it. Indeed, by defining the clitoris as the female penis, contemporary activist discourses merely phallicize female sexuality instead of attempting to understand it on its own terms. Although the clitoris may play an important role in female sexual response, does it necessarily follow that female anatomy, so radically different in form and function to male anatomy, can be understood through the latter? Yet, in the dominant discourses on genital cutting, male anatomy continues to be the yardstick against which female structures are compared...

Many men clearly believe that any loss of sensitivity that accompanies circumcision is compensated by their enhanced sexual performance. Indeed, what is interesting here is how irrelevant the issue of reduced sensation is for both the men who have this operation and their sexual partners. This poses a striking contrast to the dominant discourses surrounding female genital cutting, where the idea of a woman undergoing genital surgery to enhance her partner’s sexual pleasure (while concomitantly reducing her own level of sensation) strikes most observers as “barbaric” and misogynistic. The differing reaction these operations evoke is hardly surprising in light of the assumptions regarding instinctive, active male sexuality and fragile, passive female sexuality that I have detailed above. Thus, as Bordo points out, when it comes to sex, “mostly, men’s bodies are presented like action-hero toys—wind them up and watch them perform” (1999:191)...

Ahmadu argues that many women (herself included) who had sexual experiences prior to excision perceive either no difference or increased sexual satisfaction. She also points out that many Western women who have clitorises are unable to achieve orgasms. Similarly, Rogaia Abusharaf (2000:152) points out that Western women overemphasize the effects of female circumcision on sexual pleasure and that the specificity of African women’s experience is overlooked.

Ellen Gruenbaum (2001:133–157) also questions the generalization that female sexual response is destroyed in circumcised women, pointing out that these perspectives are, in part, the result of ethnocentrism. Discussing her Sudanese experiences, she documents the changes in her own perceptions of female sexuality, as they were challenged over the course of her fieldwork."

Keywords: female genital mutilation, able to orgasm

Shanghai/Hongkong 2007 Trip - Day 1 - Singapore-Hong Kong-Shanghai

China Trip
Day 1 (23/6) - Singapore-Hong Kong-Shanghai

Ed: The pictures in this post were restored in late December 2010 after Mediafire deleted my account in 2007

Cathay Pacific's in-flight magazine is 'bilingual' (in a manner of speaking), with some articles being translated into both languages, and others remaining in one. One of them claimed that the body takes about a day to adjust per hour of time zones passed. This is ridiculous.

Usually flight attendants wear less once the plane has taken off than before (eg they take off their vests). Cathay Pacific is the first exception I've seen.

The baggage allowance for the US is crazy. What a difference crossing the water makes.

The moment the plane came to a stop somewhere before we'd reached Hong Kong airport's terminal building, the PRCs and Hong Kongers jumped to their feet. The same happened in Shanghai - only before the lights had even gone on (it was a night landing). The only time I've seen such an impatient crowd is when the plane is filled with Singaporeans.

The security personnel at Hong Kong airport are very helpful - they have a liquids counter just before security screening with ample plastic bags for your use and they help you pack your liquids.


Shanghai Tang Orientalism! I've never seen such a short cheongsam.
Ed: I don't know why this is crooked. It displays normally before I upload it.

Stupid Hong Kong names: "Patsy" (some girl at the airport bookstore, "Relay"). This is defined by The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language as "A person easily taken advantage of, cheated, blamed, or ridiculed." Also seen in the bookstore: "Why Men Marry Bitches: A Woman's Guide to Winning Her Man's Heart". The trouble is that there's omitted variable bias - men don't go for bitches per se.


Prayer room sign in Hong Kong Airport. Since the thumbnail isn't showing: the direct link. How insensitive!

In total, I walked 4 times into 3 outlets of the bookstore, and each time they were piping Movement 2 of the Emperor Concerto. Gah. I wonder how the staff stand it.

The flight information panels at Hong Kong airport run ads where people gush effusive with praise for the place. On loop. Gah.


"Woman's pure essence" and "Man's pure essence". Actually in Chinese, they're health supplements for men and women.

On touching down in China I reflected that it'd been a long time (a decade and a half?) since I'd been in a place more authoritarian than Singapore.

At Shanghai Airport, International arrivals were grouped together with those from Hong Kong, Macau and Taiwan. Hurr hurr.

At the checkin counter at Changi, there had been a sign telling us to remove old luggage tags from our baggage. I ignored this as ridiculous, since I had not changed my address, and left my Japan Airlines tag on my backpack. On collecting my backpack in Shanghai, I noticed that the tag had been all but torn off, leaving only the elastic spring and a bit of paper attached to it. Damn, those luggage handlers must really hate the Japs. I'm lucky they didn't throw my bag into the sea!

Shanghai has bike lines in which motorbikes travel. Wth.


Quotes:

[On the Shanghai Maglev] Isn't that how our MRT works?

Return the complete common tard to our cabin crew (comment card)

"I tend to live in the past because most of my life is there." - Herb Caen

***

Some comments on iTunes I found while trying to find out how to manually refresh my library (you can't):

A: "iTunes will manage itself. You cannot place stuff in there and say "Adapt to ME!" but instead, tag your songs correctly and let iTunes sort itself out."

B: "Why can't it "Adapt to Me?" I use it, it doesn't use me."

C: "I think you'd enjoy iTunes more if you just try it the way it's intended to work and adapt your ways a bit to it. I was like you, manually managing my library, manually moving file to my iPod, etc... until I finally ripped all my CDs to iTunes and it got unwieldly. So I tried letting iTunes do it for me and haven't looked back."


Basically, I think this sums up Mac design philosophy well - things are designed to work well for a majority of users, but try to do things differently or work against the system and you'll be extremely frustrated.

Basically it's good for idiots and conformists. Since when was lack of control a good thing?!

So much for thinking different!

"Thanks to TV and for the convenience of TV, you can only be one of two kinds of human beings, either a liberal or a conservative." - Kurt Vonnegut

***

Capping off a week of stupidity, yesterday night, I wanted to go for the Louvre Chalcography exhibition since entrance to the Singapore Art Museum is free on Fridays from 6-9pm (not least since I was told it wasn't very good and having no interest in the other exhibits), so I took a bus from work at 6:15pm or so.

After a long journey, I hit a massive jam around Apollo Centre. Fed up at being stuck in traffic, I got off 2 bus stops early (just after 7:30pm), only to realise that I had to walk very far and that due to a bus lane the bus was now free to zip to its destination. Given that the museum would close at 8:30-45pm (9pm on paper), I figured there was no point and went home, deciding to try again the next day since $4 was alright.

Today, I went down again (being misled by streetdirectory.com) into taking a bus I suspect took a longer route than another one. There was a plaque outside the building noting that it used to be St Joseph's Institution, but this aside there was no information on what was after all a gazetted National Monument. I was expecting there to be plaques around the premises: "this is where students were caned when they were naughty", "this is where the Brothers sodomised the kids" etc.

Entering the museum, I was greeted by the guy at the ticket counter with a "Welcome to Singapore". Momentarily stunned, I averred that I was a local. Now, I have been 小姐-ed (xiao2 jie5-ed - mistaken for a girl) often enough in the past, but this is the first time I've been mistaken for a foreigner. Either he thought I was an American Indian (untied hair notwithstanding) or locals don't go to the art museum. But then if it's the former, why do people keep speaking in Chinese to me even when they only hear English coming out from my mouth?

The only reason I went was for the Chalcography of the Louvre special exhibition, though I'd heard that it was disappointing. Indeed it was - since unlimited prints can be made from plates, the exhibition was basically of prints that could be found in the Louvre gift shop, with 2 plates, a video describing the process and a projection of details of prints of heavenly spheres (shown to the first movement of the Moonlight Sonata) thrown in as sops. Ironically, the print of the Mona Lisa is bigger than the actual painting.

The permanent collection was even worse, since it was all modern 'art' (the earliest works were from the 1930s), ie mostly crap. Then again, my dislike of modern 'art' aside, it still wasn't very impressive (compared to the modern 'art' I've seen elsewhere); there was very little on display (though I'm told they've a lot more on storage), with too little put in too much space - there was more in the temporary exhibitions than the permanent galleries, which is the reverse of everywhere else.

Ironically, for the Singapore Art Museum, there wasn't much Singaporean art, with at least half the permanent collection consisting of works from the rest of Southeast Asia. A banner proclaimed that they had the world's largest public collection of works from Southeast Asia, so I conclude that Art is dead in Southeast Asia (or that corrupt officials are hording the rest).

Zeng Fanzhi's Communists version of the Last Supper was interesting though, but he should've made Jesus Chairman Mao to complete the effect. There was a 'painting' (I use the term loosely) of a wild boar by this Indonesian artist Affandi - haram!

Perhaps most damningly, the stuff sold in the gift shop not only looked better than that on display in the galleries (eg Some full-colour Louvre prints) but was also novel to me. Viz., there was only item in the gift shop which I had seen in the galleries. Now, the point of a gift shop (besides earning money for the museum) is to let visitors buy souvenirs of what they have seen in the museum, so I didn't know what they were trying to do. Then again, since what was on display sucked perhaps this was a good move on their part. The gift shop also had a female T-shirt promoting the D24 durian. Uhh.

All in all, the Singapore Art Museum sucked. The admission sticker read: "No experience is necessary" - to appreciate the exhibits, one didn't need art experience. It should've read: "No experience is desired" - one who had seen other art museums or who had knowledge of art would know just how much bad it was.


In other news, this thing which I'd seen in people's commencement pictures (IIRC) seems to previously have been at the Singapore Art Museum.

"[Long hair] is considered bohemian, which may be why I grew it, but I keep it long because I love the way it feels, part cloak, part fan, part mane, part security blanket." - Marge Piercy

***

Someone: i think love in singapore is far too expectant
and unsurprising
and contrived
and almost burdensome


Johnny Malkavian: eh there's actually a 'cooking with cum' video
it's one of those things you NEVER see ok

collector's item
hahah

but you HAVE to see the video
it's damn sick lor

it looked like an XXX episode of Fear Factor


Lynn on my Interminable Chain of Unmitigated Disasters: as to why it keeps happening to you... i dunno. all i learned in psych is that, if it happens to you regardless of situational diffs, it's an internal reason i.e. your fault. hahaha


Someone: why you not going for ***'s event

alex au ah!
must go see him in person

Me: I saw him in person before

Someone: oh
-_-

Me: hurr hurr

eh you know me man
you must be star struck

Someone: OH PLEASE!
i didnt even know you were famous

and now that i know you are famous i dont know how come you're famous
-________-

Me: you lousy :P


Someone else: lol you're better read than most i suppose
although of course, erudition is basically "he's read what I've read"

Me: nah I just know a lot of shit from here and there

hahahaha

Someone else: lol isn't that the definition

Me: heh
well I don't read whole books

Someone else: lol let you in on smth
most of us in lit, we don't either :P

Me: heh
with 7 books a module, how to?!

Someone else: persactly

mind you
some oddballs manage it
cos they read in advance during the term break

this is madness

Me: this is NUS!


Frigid Girl: this quote is quite sad

"Sometimes I pretend to choke in the cafeteria, and then when someone comes to give me the heimlech, I turn around quickly, just to get a hug."

someone's subnick


Someone: gabriel, you have to stop this non-stop, continuous quoting in your conversations
people want to talk to you, not to a wall of hackneyed phrases

quoting will make you sound intelligent, but only to a certain extent
after that it becomes very jarring for the opposing party

i quote to you:

Dakin: The more you read though, the more you'll see that literature is actually about losers.
Scripps: No.
Dakin: It's consolation. All literature is consolation.
(The History Boys, Alan Bennett)

For those who didn't notice, new blog picture:

Dear Guest,

You are cordially invited to register for Confluence 2007, which will be held on 21 July 2007, at the Shangri-la Hotel in Singapore, with the theme "Globalisation - Can Singapore Endure?" Registration can be done online at www.confluence-sg.org.

Confluence is an annual global students' symposium, ministerial dialogue session and corporate networking fair. The inaugural Confluence, held in 2006, saw the overseas student community make the headlines in every major newspaper in Singapore. More than 900 students from universities all over the world gathered at the Raffles City Convention Centre to engage Teo Chee Hean, Minister for Defence and the Civil Service, in a candid discussion on Singapore 's future. In addition, students also had the opportunity to interact and network with representatives from some 18 employer organisations.

The keynote speaker will be Dr Ng Eng Hen, Minister for Manpower and Second Minister for Defence.

Highlights of the day's programme include:

(1) Banking and Finance Careers Seminar - 10.30 am
(2) Technology Careers Seminar - 11.30 am
(3) Maritime Careers Seminar - 11.30 am
(4) Dialogue with Dr Ng Eng Hen - 2.00 pm
(5) Career Networking Fair - all day

There will also be a free dim sum lunch buffet spread for all guests.

Participants will be admitted by named invitation card only.

Please visit www.confluence-sg.org to register NOW!


Someone: wah u help confluence advertise ah

the girl who came to promote confluence to us, to ask *** for help in linking up with influential industry ppl, was so freaking irritating

she had that pseudo-American accent that those elitist crap adopt after 3mths in Boston
and she everytime she spoke, her eyes made like she was going to roll them out of their sockets

=x

shit i'm beginning to anticipate u quoting me
that's bad
and i have a feeling u're gonna quote that too

it's one of those things...ring the bell n the doggie will salivate
u've conditioned ppl around u to be sensitive to things like that

hahaha
ask ['the 24 year old virgin']
he prob feels it too

"Though I am grateful for the blessings of wealth, it hasn't changed who I am. My feet are still on the ground. I'm just wearing better shoes." - Oprah Winfrey

***

Jokes, some dumb:


The Love Quiz
-------------

1. What three household items are your idea for a romantic evening?

a) A roll of duct tape, a can of beans and some pliers.
b) A wig, an umbrella and some jumper cables.
c) A snow globe, a water gun and some piano wire


2. When you're whispering in your loved one's ear, how might they respond?

a) "How dare you talk about my momma!"
b) "Can you move? I can't see the television."
c) "Yes I paid the light bill."


3. Which Stooge best describes how you and your partner fool around?

a) Curly - active and full of energy
b) Moe - abusive and mean
c) Larry - you know..


4.Which of the following is your idea of a romantic meal?

a) Double Quarter Pounder with cheese Meal from McDonalds.
b) The Big Beef Burrito Supreme Meal from Taco Bell
c) An order of Buffalo Wings from Domino's pizza


5. What is your favorite part of your lover's body?

a) The part they can put behind their head.
b) The part they put in your ear.
c) The part that can fix your dinner


Total the points for the answers you gave
-----------------------------------------

1) a=5
b=10
c=0

2) a=10
b=5
c=0

3) a=10
b=0
c=5

4) a=5
b=0
c=10

5) a=5
b=10
c=0


What does it all mean?
----------------------


50-41: A Rose
A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, and you, my friend, have
dived head first in a vat of the old "Love Potion Number Nine."

40-31: A Sunflower
Your techniques are dead on target but a little refresher course from Mr. Feelgood might raise your HMO, if you know what I mean. (Actually I don't know what I mean.)

30-21: A Daffodil
Things will heat up when the pressure's on but they can disappear quickly with a quick gust of the wind. Kiss your lover before they kiss you goodbye.

20-11: A Tulip
Chances are your significant other thinks you're boring, dull and unattractive. Now here's the bad news...

10-0: Crabgrass
Your significant other thinks you're clinically dead.


Little Johnny said to Suzi, "We're going to have a GREAT time Saturday. I've gotten three tickets for the big game."

"Why do we need three?" asked Suzi.

Little Johnny gave her an evil grin and said, "They're for your Father, Mother and kid sister!"


Once upon a time, a Sultan was blessed with the birth of a son after years of hoping. The boy immediately became the apple of his father's eye.

Just before his son's sixth birthday, the Sultan said to him, "Son, I love you very much. Your birthday is coming soon. What would you like?"

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to have my own airplane." His father bought him American Airlines.

Just before his son's seventh birthday, the Sultan said, "Son, you are my pride and joy. Ask what you want for your birthday. Whatever it is, it's yours."

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like a boat." His father bought him the Princess Cruise Line.

Just before his son's eighth birthday, the Sultan said, "Son, you bring so much happiness into my life. Anything you want, I shall get for you."

His son replied, "Daddy, I would like to be able to watch cartoons." His father bought him Disney Studios.

Just before his son's ninth birthday, the Sultan said, "Son, you are my life. Your birthday is coming soon. Ask what you wish. I will get it for you."

His son, who had grown to love Disney, replied, "Daddy, I would like a Mickey Mouse outfit and a Goofy outfit"

His father bought him the Democratic Party and CBS news.


Little Nancy was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced kid was up to, he asked, "What are you doing there, Nancy?"

"My goldfish died, and I've just buried him," replied Nancy, tearfully,
without looking up.

The neighbor was very concerned, said "That's an awfully big grave for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Nancy patted down the last heap of dirt then replied, "That's because he's inside your f*cking cat."


A Young Aussie was enjoying his first night in Rome drinking cappuccino at a pavement cafe when a pretty girl sat beside him.

"Hello," he said. "Do you understand English?"

"Only a little," she answered.

"How much?" he asked.

"Fifty dollars," she replied.


I watched an ant climb a blade of grass this morning. When he reached the top, his weight bent the blade down to the ground. Then, twisting his thorax with insectile precision, he grabbed hold of the next blade. In this manner, he traveled across the lawn, covering as much distance vertically as he did horizontally, which amused and delighted me. And then, all at once, I had what is sometimes called an "epiphany", a moment of heightened awareness in which everything becomes clear. Yes,
hunched over that ant on my hands and knees, I suddenly knew what I had to do... Quit drinking before noon.


One guy was explaining to his friend how the life often compensates for a person's natural deficiencies. "You see," he said, "If someone is a bit blind he might have a very good sense of hearing, or if his sense of taste has gone, he may have a keen sense of smell." "I agree with you," said the other. "I've always noticed that if a woman has one small breast , the other one is always just that little bit larger."

"Over the past two decades a literature big enough to fill a small airplane hangar has been produced on the causes of East Asian economic success...

To say that the Left critics got it wrong is not to say that the neoliberals got it right. The neoliberals have tended either to ignore contrary evidence or to acknowledge it without thought for its theoretical implications. This selective inattention to data that would upset the approved way of interpreting things and the use of repetition as a chief weapon of argument are two strong signs that the neoliberal paradigm is in a degenerative stage, taking on attributes of a disciplined delusional system. Like much Marxist writing of the 1970s, in fact. And like classical economics during the Great Depression, before Keynes's theoretical breakthrough...

My own evidence, illustrated above, suggests that neoliberal economists have been pioneering a whole new principle of causal inference - that to explain superior economic performance one may either simply ignore everything that is not in line with neoliberal prescriptions or assert that it hindered what would otherwise have been an even better performance. When this principle is combined with a wider professional propensity to treat "power" as a third-rank concept (the new 4,000-page Palgraue Dictionary of Economics has no entry for "power"), the result is an aversion to serious investigation of the role of the state in economic development. Assertions like "success has been achieved [in Korea] despite intervention" are put forth without a shred of evidence. In this way the circle is closed, the paradigm is protected, and minds can be set at rest...

After the Economist published an unusually enthusiastic review of Governing the Market (June 1, 1991, pp. 102-3), the reviewer received over six transatlantic phone calls from World Bank officials ringing to complain about the Economist publishing a favorable review of a book by an interventionist. Several said the journal was lowering its standards. Another said, "Don't you know he is an interventionist?" The reviewer asked each whether he had read the book or even glanced at it. Answer: No, in every case."

- EAST ASIA'S ECONOMIC SUCCESS. Conflicting Perspectives, Partial Insights, Shaky Evidence, ROBERT WADE, 1992

UCV2207: The Politics of Heritage

"The module focuses on the relationship between cultural heritage and contemporary political and social situations. It is designed to provide students with opportunities to explore a range of theoretical and intellectual issues from the fields of anthropology, geography and archaeology on cultural heritage and the roles that ‘place’ and material culture play within the enactment of social practices. It draws upon historical and contemporary case studies provide real world problems for engaging with the theoretical components of the module. There is an emphasis upon debate, discussion, and problem oriented individual and group projects. Several day trips around Singapore, as well as an extended field trip to Cambodia are offered as part of the module...

Field Trips:
Six days in Phenom Phen and Siem Reap in Cambodia to visit Angkor Wat, and several sites related to the Khmer Rouge regime’s rule; related to material covered in weeks 5 and 6."


Wah.

庄子蝴蝶梦

庄子蝴蝶梦

昔者庄周梦为蝴蝶，栩栩然蝴蝶也，自喻适志与，不知周也。俄然觉，则据据然周也。不知周之梦为蝴蝶与？蝴蝶之梦为周与？周与蝴蝶，则必有分矣。此之谓物化。

"After all, all he did was string together a lot of old, well-known quotations." - H. L. Mencken, on Shakespeare

***

Someone: well, the "i hate men" sign keeps at least one annoying guy away, so it works for me

Me: hahahahahahahah
ok

anyway no one is scolding you for misandry right!

Someone: yep!
i'm perfectly justified : P

Me: see, if I were to say, with much more justification "i hate women", everyone would be over me in a jiffy
this is a sexist society

Someone: really? i think you just know too many girls.


Someone else: if he would read some in-depth philosophy
and get some logic into his statements
and not argue for the sake of arguing

he'd be a pretty good writer

[On someone else] *** is very very smart
actually.. i think ***'s absolutely ridiculous
very sharp

Me: haha
bad combi huh

Someone else: oh well...
doesn't matter

you don't need to say anything for *** to accuse you of it
*** merely well.. re-frames your words

Me: hah
slanders me


Someone: i think sometimes i really believe like a small girl hahahaa

Me: haha
girls will be girls

Someone: haha u rather have a mature girl?
bet guys also dun wan

Me: haha
here we come to an interesting paradox

Someone: thats why

guys dont want mature women..they feel stifled and their ego is deflated...they want the girl to prance in front of them and amuse them

loll

Me: haha
one of the reasons for the misery of the human condition
what we want and what we need aren't the same

girls don't want nice guys... they want jerks to emotionally manipulate them

Someone: haha

i want nice guys
but nice guys are boring see
at least the jerks are interesting

Me: haha
I'm glad you recognise that

Someone: its plain what

Me: most women lie to themselves and others

Someone: thats not true
most pple lie to themselves and others

Me: haha
men are less dishonest lah

Someone: thats cause they dunno what they want
so they want to be honest, but they dont know what to say
hahahaa

Me: women know what they want meh

Someone: they know better

guys cant move on
something wrong there..emotionally retarded
at least women know what they dont want after a while
guys NEVER know
hahaha

they dont want alread
they will...regret, think, ponder, etc
haha
women, say no means no

Me: well
we must look at revealed preferences =D

Someone: Haha difficult to generalise also wad

why do guys prefer bitches to nice girls
is the same thing wad
nice girls = boring, predictable, too easy to get

Me: I didn't say it's not the same =D

anyway guys want pretty girls, not bitches
but pretty girls tend to be bitches. because they can get what they want

Someone: haha yar thats true

damnit man
i wish i was prettier so i can be a bitch

stupid
if guys dont give in to the bitches, they wouldnt be bitches

Me: haha
perhaps

Someone: but guys all superficial shit
jus like girls

hahaha

Me: this is why my favourite misanthrope hates people


jb: but I'm so conceited, I don't like discussing philo with people in my class
because it's never a discussion; it's always some sort of education on the concept first. (:

Me: ...
so snobbish

jb: yeah I am!
I like being a philo smartass
since I can't be one at anything else. except maybe SS
which I have you to thank for
(:

if I'd never met you, I'd never have joined YR. YR was totally my SS crash course
it makes me look smart when I talk about all the stuff the government has done


Tim The Great on Singapore: i was going around looking at people's eyes. there doesn't seem to be very much life, or soul, or whatever you call it. they look like the pre-renaissance section in the louvre.

"The nice part about being a pessimist is that you are constantly being either proven right or pleasantly surprised." - George F. Will

***

Quotes:

I can't forsee myself doing a 9-5 job. [Me: This is a 8:30-6 job.] Oops.

Do you have any normal stuff on your body?... Everytime you show me something it's something abnormal.

[On my name card] Someone else already gave it to me.

[Me: The primary female gender defects are irrationality, gullibility, risk averseness and paranoia.] [Incoming freshman with an elbow suddenly on me: Say that again?] Don't worry. He's going on to his final year so you only have one more year of this to go.

[To incoming freshman] USP is full of people who are weird in their own way. So what's your... eccentricity?

You are Bishan Gay-briel.

If you were a girl - you are a girl. What am I talking about? [Someone: Do you want me to check?]

[Me on some esoteric, intellectual conversation: Are you zoning out yet?] Yes. [Me: See, it's hard to find women like your sister.] Thank god.

My sex education consisted of 'Don't go to dark places with boys' and 'Masturbation is bad for health'.

[On How Girls Waste Time] Tell me the most controversial one. [Me: Err. Locked in the bedroom for hours performing unspeakable acts?] You mean guys don't do that? [Me: They'e not mutually exclusive. Guys got recovery period.] You guys are disgusting. (have a)

[Someone on City Harvest: Tell me about the rituals.] First they slaughtered the lamb. Then they painted its blood over the Expo.

[On Shafy] Have you seen her hair?

[On a nymphomaniac] I know a female friend... 'If I don't have it, I can't function.' It's like her daily fix.

It's better doing it with a man than getting off on your own.

[Me: You should get to know Chinese girls. Then you can have cross-racial perspectives on sexuality.] I know some Chinese girls. They don't go for Chinese guys.

I think all girls have a fantasy about black guys.

I think it's quite sad. Liking a guy and then discovering he's small... Of course you'll end it, but you feel bad.

[On learning Mandarin] The biggest issue in my class was tones. 'Do you know what you just said?... You called your mom a horse.'

Dessert? It's on us. [Intern: We should order the whole store.] Moral hazard. That's why we only tell you at the end.

One of my friends had never interacted with an Indian before... The first time she saw me, she asked 'Does your whole family make prata?'... One day all of my friends put on singlet and sarong and made prata.

I used to find oral sex disgusting... Up until JC... After that I met somebody.

This is another thing. Every woman wants to be a whore... Small sample size - the girls I know.

I wouldn't eat shit. [Me: Would you drink urine?] Yeah.

[Me: Over the years I've learnt you can't trust anything women say.] Over the years I've learnt you can't trust anything men say. [Me: *Laughs* So what people say can't be trusted.]

I have people who give me mixed signals. And you know what, only Chinese guys do that.

Hey, do you want to have a baby? [Me: *stare*] Err, do you want to have children?... Don't you want someone to dote on? [Me: That's what a dog is for.] Don't you want someone who can talk back? [Me: That's what a significant other is for.]

I know this boy, 16, who slept with this woman, 25. She got pregnant. They're getting married. They're Malay. I had to say that... [Me: Does the Indian Muslim community have that problem?] No. Our main problem is our girls run off with Indian boys... Hindu boys.

[On clubbing] If you know what you can get, then you can get something... There'll always be somebody who finds you very attractive. Don't you feel that way, even though you might not feel the same way about them?

I see you, like, you know, getting it on with some woman who plays the cello or something... in a very classical setting... [On Hob VIIb:2 - 1] She's playing this piece, but she's white. Oh, and she's older than you... I'm trying to think where I got this image. Do you watch Sex and the City?

I think there needs to be radical reintepretation of the Koran. [Me: ie Make it say what you want it to say.]

[Me: Are you going to wear your tudung in Hungary?] Yeah... It's an interesting conversation starter.

How cute. Haloscan inserts a comments box into each post page.

***

u r wt u wr:

- 'Little Miss Naughty'
- 'Little Miss Bad'
- 'Let's have some cake' (No innuendo, but ???)
- 'Friends don't let friends talk to ugly boys' (Variant on a previous one. Shouldn't it read "poor" or "nice" boys?)
- 'I'm almost single'
- 'God made mud. God made dirt. God made guys. So girls should flirt' (Complete version of a previously spotted entry)
- 'I ♥ country boys'
- 'Please ask me for more details'
- 'Never judge a girl by her T-shirt' (contributed)

"We must respect the other fellow's religion, but only in the sense and to the extent that we respect his theory that his wife is beautiful and his children smart." - H L Mencken

(Quote and article from ATHEIST HAVEN)

***

The Problem with Religious Moderates by Sam Harris

"Two myths now keep faith beyond the fray of rational criticism, and they seem to foster religious extremism and religious moderation equally: (i) most of us believe that there are good things that people get from religious faith (e.g., strong communities, ethical behavior, spiritual experience) that cannot be had elsewhere; (2) many of us also believe that the terrible things that are sometimes done in the name of religion are the products not of faith per se but of our baser natures-forces like greed, hatred, and fear-for which religious beliefs are themselves the best (or even the only) remedy. Taken together, these myths seem to have granted us perfect immunity to outbreaks of reasonableness in our public discourse.

Many religious moderates have taken the apparent high road of pluralism, asserting the equal validity of all faiths, but in doing so they neglect to notice the irredeemably sectarian truth claims of each. As long as a Christian believes that only his baptized brethren will be saved on the Day of judgment, he cannot possibly "respect" the beliefs of others, for he knows that the flames of hell have been stoked by these very ideas and await their adherents even now...

While moderation in religion may seem a reasonable position to stake out, in light of all that we have (and have not) learned about the universe, it offers no bulwark against religious extremism and religious violence. The problem that religious moderation poses for all of us is that it does not permit anything very critical to be said about religious literalism. We cannot say that fundamentalists are crazy, because they are merely practicing their freedom of belief; we cannot even say that they are mistaken in religious terms, because their knowledge of scripture is generally unrivaled. All we can say, as religious moderates, is that we don't like the personal and social costs that a full embrace of scripture imposes on us. This is not a new form of faith, or even a new species of scriptural exegesis; it is simply a capitulation to a variety of all-too-human interests that have nothing, in principle, to do with God.

Unless the core dogmas of faith are called into question-i.e., that we know there is a God, and that we know what he wants from us-religious moderation will do nothing to lead us out of the wilderness...

Religious moderation, insofar as it represents an attempt to hold on to what is still serviceable in orthodox religion, closes the door to more sophisticated approaches to spirituality, ethics, and the building of strong communities.

Religious moderates seem to believe that what we need is not radical insight and innovation in these areas but a mere dilution of Iron Age philosophy. Rather than bring the full force of our creativity and rationality to bear on the problems of ethics, social cohesion, and even spiritual experience, moderates merely ask that we relax our standards of adherence to ancient superstitions and taboos, while otherwise maintaining a belief system that was passed down to us from men and women whose lives were simply ravaged by their basic ignorance about the world. In what other sphere of life is such subservience to tradition acceptable? Medicine? Engineering? Not even politics suffers the anachronism that still dominates our thinking about ethical values and spiritual experience."

Template migration to do list:

- Migrate template (with some judicious removals)
- Migrate Haloscan (Haloscan seems to work within the Blogger comments code. Since I haven't been using the Blogger comments system, and there isn't a way to do this automatically, this means I am faced with the prospect of manually enabling comments for 3912 posts - everything before this?! I will look for a way to hack this)
(I nixed the '<b:if cond='data:post.allowComments'>' and corresponding '</b:if>' tags so even if comments are disabled I can use Haloscan comments)

- Verbiage trimming
- Add recent comments widget
- Blend Google AdSense and Search colours (Half done. I'll use a colour picker later
(I moved the Search box so it would blend, since I have a feeling we can't modify the colour of the box)
- Adjust layer widths (This may be a bit tricky. I'll need to edit the frame border graphics to make them wider) (fixed thanks to ashke CSS and photoshop help)

- Add YACCS legacy link (forget it)
- Final tidying up


KIV:

- Move comments into a better spot (I gave up. Maybe some time in the future)


Template migration is essentially DONE as of 1:11AM, August 30th (finally!).

Courtesy of Liquid Nitrogen:

Man Arrested After Telling Women They Were 'Extremely Beautiful'

"A man who told two women they were extremely beautiful was arrested on charges of harassment last week, Denver police said.

Police said 32-year-old Jeff John Hergert approached the women and "expressed interest in them." He told each woman in two separate incidents that they were extremely beautiful and that they should consider modeling.

Hergert was arrested and is being held on two counts of harassment. He is being held on a $10,000 bond."

"In the past quarter century, we exposed biases against other races and called it racism, and we exposed biases against women and called it sexism. Biases against men we call humor." - Warren Farrell

Nicole: shdnt it be feminism?

***

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It’s a beautiful day and love is in the air. Marie leans over to Pierre and says, "Pierre, kiss me!" Our hero grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie’s lips.

"What are you doing, Pierre?" says the startled Marie. "I am Pierre, the famous French fighter pilot! When I have red meat, I like to have red wine!" She smiles and they start kissing. When things began to heat up a little, Marie says, "Pierre, kiss me lower."

Our hero tears her blouse open, grabs a bottle of Chardonnay and starts pouring it all over her breasts. "Pierre! What are you doing?", asks the bewildered Marie. "I am Pierre the famous French fighter pilot! When I have white meat, I like to have white wine!" They resume their passionate interlude and things really steam up.

Marie leans close to his ear and whispers, "Pierre, kiss me lower!" Our hero, grabs a bottle of Cognac and pours it in her lap. He then strikes a match and lights it on fire. Marie shrieks and dives into the river.

Standing waist deep, Marie throws her arms upwards and screams furiously, "PIERRE, what in the hell do you think you’re doing?"

Our hero stands up, defiantly, and says, "I am Pierre the famous French fighter pilot! When I go down, I go down in flames!"

I am currently attempting to migrate to a new template with the advanced Blogger features.

The dust will not settle for a while.

"It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf." - H. L. Mencken

***

Someone: see my nick? ("Is there such a thing as "when u meet the one... u will know?"")
wad do u think

Me: no I don't think so
there's no "the one"

partner finding can be thought of as an optimal control problem

Someone: i think so man

my fren just had the experience
and she's gg to marry him

Me: wah lao. he must either be very good, she must be very ineligible or she must be irrational (re: optimal control)


Someone else: wanna watch transformers?

nobody to watch with :(

i need more friends with the RIGHT kind of benefits
haha

Me: hurr hurr
ask [Fuck Buddy 1] or [Fuck Buddy 2] lor

Someone else: fear of rejection lah

Me: WTH
you fear being rejected for a movie?!?!

Someone else: nolah
the movie represents dating which represents interest

Me: !@#$%^&*()


MFM on Psycho Girls 1-3: Are all these psycho girls Christian?

Me: Actually they all are. Hmm. Maybe there's something to the good fruit theory after all...


Someone: hahaha
i dont really like traveling
but i like to see the world!

Me: wth?!

Someone: haha
no i mean
i dont really like plane rides

Me: gah


My Little Bird: women? why is a rational person like you doing trying to discuss a subject so irrational?


MFTTW: i have to say though, *** is very good at spewing out paragraphs ful of circular arguments
that's a sign of a well-trained singapore lit student!

Me: hahahahahaha

I don't know
they're so circular even I get confused
why don't you dissect them =D

MFTTW: i can't. they're circular. my brain doesn't work that way

honestly by the time i get to the end of a particular sentence i've forgotten what the beginning was about.
and i'm not even exaggerating

Me: hehe
me too!

one *** trick
overwhelm people

MFTTW: i'm certain it's not a lawyerly thing

oh phew. i'm glad it's not just me. i thought i was just stupid or something.


MFTTW: hurr yo uare sure that *** is not a bimbo?

maybe she's on crack
she sounds very spacey

Me: yeah well women
hurr hurr

see, where to find someone like you?!

MFTTW: science fac
or engin fac
hahahhaha

but not hot
:D


HWMNBN: women are like CIA black ops agents - it's all about plausible deniability

seriously women are masters of the reverse stroke... they always want to lure you into overreaching and then jujitsu you emotionally onto your face

at least women in our part of the world/culture

"All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and Jill a rich widow." - Evan Esar

***

One of the POCM updated Watchthatpage somehow missed (or maybe he just updated the site but not the updates page):


"How come scholars disagree; 200 years of Christian Scholarship in 455 words

All the way into the early 1800s thinking people generally believed the stories in the gospels were based on real events. The details weren't certain—maybe Jesus was divine maybe He wasn't, but he was a real person; maybe the "miracles" were supernatural, maybe they were natural events misunderstood by naive ancients, but at the core of each miracle was a real event in Jesus' life. Jesus was a real person. The gospels, however ham-handedly, record actual events. That's what pastors believed. And laymen. And professors. No careful, reasoned analysis convinced people otherwise.

Then, in 1835, this German kid (at 27 already a university lecturer, fluent in ancient languages and expert in NT scholarship) genamened David Strauss came out with a book he called The Life of Jesus Critically Examined—"the most pestilential book ever vomited out of the jaws of hell." Professor Strauss lost not just his job but his career. Angry believers never allowed him to teach again.

Dr. Strauss' buch went through the gospels miracle by miracle, analyzing the best rationalist explanations of each of them. What his book shows, over and over, is that the rationalist explanations were so contrived and self contradictory and far fetched, they couldn't be believed. That was a very big deal, because everybody now saw that the "history" in the gospels could not be real history. The unavoidable implication of David Friedrich Strauss' the Life of Jesus Critically Examined was that—is that—the gospel writers got their "history" by making it up. The gospel stories are not history, they are myth. Oops.

Here's where the relevance to modern scholarship comes in. Not everyone was willing to accept Dr. Strauss' results. Stubborn believing scholars couldn't out reason David Strauss, but they could refuse to think about his ideas. They simply put their fingers in their ears and insisted the bible is history, Jesus did the things described there. La, la, la, la la la la. Rational scholarship and (some of) believing scholarship split.

Even rationalist scholars who accepted Strauss' reasoning disagreed with each other.

Some focused on the myth part of non-historical myth. A school of late 19th and early 20th century scholars worked out theories of the pagan origins of the Christ myth. The bible is myth. The New Testament has no meaningful history. Jesus is a myth explained by His parallels with other ancient myths.

Because myth means "untrue," and untrue means "no meaning," and even non-literalist believing scholars were anxious to preserve the meaning of Christianity, most rationalist scholars fudged myth and focused on the non-historical part of non-historical myth. The NT is not direct history but it is, they imagined, history filtered through the beliefs and circumstances of the early church. Jesus was a real person. He can be rooted out by picking through the gospel stories for the historical kernel. Thus the Jesus Seminar and much of 20th century academic New Testament scholarship.

Non-literalist believers focused not on myth or historical rigor but the meaning of belief. The NT is, vaguely, allegorically, somehow-historically an image of the reflected echo of the eternal Godhead. Jesus too. Kumbaya.

Splitsville
Christian scholarship splintered. Scholars who understand the NT as myth write articles about...the NT as myth. Scholars who imagine the bible is literally true are unimpressed, and uninterested. Ditto the Jesus Seminar historical rationalists. Etc. Scholarship about Christianity's origins is busted into little pieces, everyone with their own wildly different theory about what the most basic facts are. Other than occasional long range sniping, scholars in the various camps don't even talk to each other. They can't. The other guy insists on gibbering nonsense.

Splitsville leads to...
"There is more historical evidence for Jesus than there is for George Washington"
I get this email from time to time, from nice, ernest people repeating what they heard in church. It's from a group of silly claims that do the rounds among bible literalist Christians. You can do it yourself. Just fill in the famous person blank. There is more evidence for Jesus than there is for:   Plato / Alexander the Great / Caesar / Washington / your_famous_person_here.

My answer to these emails runs, "Please list exactly the evidence you have in mind. List the evidence for Washington (Plato / Caesar / etc.). List the evidence for Jesus." They can't, of course. Checking the facts has honestly never occurred to them. And that's the point. That's what Splitsville does to "scholarship." It splits the thinking up into little camps of like minded people, camps where fundamental-axiom-wise everyone agrees with everyone else, and no one checks the facts. Or challenges the basic reasons.

The scholarship of Christian believers isn't about whether the Jesus stories are true, it's about how the Jesus stories are true. It's the same for the other side. Fashionable academic scholarship isn't about whether the Jesus People theory is true, it's about how the Jesus People theory is true.

Does this mean Ronald Nash, and Arthur Darby Nock are bad people? Are the Jesus Seminar professors out to cheat and lie? No it doesn't. No they're not. The Christian origins question is a tough one. Honest people disagree, honestly.

What it does mean is that fundamentally none of the scholarship is rigorous, and you can't depend on this scholar, or that one, to tell you what to think."


There's also a good page refuting the claim that Christianity seems to have been borrowed from the pagans because it borrowed from Judaism (ignoring the fact that one small, unimportant kingdom could not have had so much borrowed from it):

"Here's the set up:

1. We read about ancient Canaanite religion in Canaanite clay tablets dug up at Ras Shamara in Syria. (In ancient times the sign said Ugarit.)

2.We read about ancient Jewish religion from the Old Testament.

3. Ugarit fell centuries before Israel existed; so if there was borrowing, it had to be from Canaanite to Israelite.

What Dr. Smith points out is that a number of technical religious words are the same in Ugaritic as they are in Biblical Hebrew. He gives a list, and he gives citations so you can go look them up if that will make you happy..

His point is: "This incidence of highly specialized sacrificial terms suggests a common West Semitic heritage.""

Psychology Today: Ten Politically Incorrect Truths About Human Nature

"Excerpted from Why Beautiful People Have More Daughters, by Alan S. Miller and Satoshi Kanazawa, to be published by Perigree in September 2007.

1. Men like blond bombshells (and women want to look like them)

Long before TV—in 15th- and 16th- century Italy, and possibly two millennia ago—women were dying their hair blond. A recent study shows that in Iran, where exposure to Western media and culture is limited, women are actually more concerned with their body image, and want to lose more weight, than their American counterparts. It is difficult to ascribe the preferences and desires of women in 15th-century Italy and 21st-century Iran to socialization by media...

Until very recently, it was a mystery to evolutionary psychology why men prefer women with large breasts, since the size of a woman's breasts has no relationship to her ability to lactate. But Harvard anthropologist Frank Marlowe contends that larger, and hence heavier, breasts sag more conspicuously with age than do smaller breasts. Thus they make it easier for men to judge a woman's age (and her reproductive value) by sight—suggesting why men find women with large breasts more attractive.

Alternatively, men may prefer women with large breasts for the same reason they prefer women with small waists. A new study of Polish women shows that women with large breasts and tight waists have the greatest fecundity, indicated by their levels of two reproductive hormones (estradiol and progesterone).

Blond hair is unique in that it changes dramatically with age. Typically, young girls with light blond hair become women with brown hair. Thus, men who prefer to mate with blond women are unconsciously attempting to mate with younger (and hence, on average, healthier and more fecund) women...

[Ed: I don't think there's a cross-cultural preference for big breasts.]

2. Humans are naturally polygamous

Among primate and nonprimate species, the degree of polygyny highly correlates with the degree to which males of a species are larger than females. The more polygynous the species, the greater the size disparity between the sexes. Typically, human males are 10 percent taller and 20 percent heavier than females. This suggests that, throughout history, humans have been mildly polygynous.

[Ed: I thought this meant, rather, that men naturally cheat on women.]

3. Most women benefit from polygyny, while most men benefit from monogamy

The only exceptions are extremely desirable women. Under monogamy, they can monopolize the wealthiest men; under polygyny, they must share the men with other, less desirable women. However, the situation is exactly opposite for men. Monogamy guarantees that every man can find a wife. True, less desirable men can marry only less desirable women, but that's much better than not marrying anyone at all.

4. Most suicide bombers are Muslim

Suicide missions are not always religiously motivated, but according to Oxford University sociologist Diego Gambetta, editor of Making Sense of Suicide Missions, when religion is involved, the attackers are always Muslim. Why?
The surprising answer is that Muslim suicide bombing has nothing to do with Islam or the Quran (except for two lines). It has a lot to do with sex, or, in this case, the absence of sex...

Across all societies, polygyny makes men violent, increasing crimes such as murder and rape, even after controlling for such obvious factors as economic development, economic inequality, population density, the level of democracy, and political factors in the region...

It is the combination of polygyny and the promise of a large harem of virgins in heaven that motivates many young Muslim men to commit suicide bombings. Consistent with this explanation, all studies of suicide bombers indicate that they are significantly younger than not only the Muslim population in general but other (nonsuicidal) members of their own extreme political organizations like Hamas and Hezbollah. And nearly all suicide bombers are single.

[Ed: I wonder if they applied this to the LTTE.]

5. Having sons reduces the likelihood of divorce

The continued presence of (and investment by) the father is therefore important for the son, but not as crucial for the daughter. The presence of sons thus deters divorce and departure of the father from the family more than the presence of daughters, and this effect tends to be stronger among wealthy families.

6. Beautiful people have more daughters

One of the most celebrated principles in evolutionary biology, the Trivers-Willard hypothesis, states that wealthy parents of high status have more sons, while poor parents of low status have more daughters... This hypothesis has been documented around the globe. American presidents, vice presidents, and cabinet secretaries have more sons than daughters. Poor Mukogodo herders in East Africa have more daughters than sons. Church parish records from the 17th and 18th centuries show that wealthy landowners in Leezen, Germany, had more sons than daughters, while farm laborers and tradesmen without property had more daughters than sons. In a survey of respondents from 46 nations, wealthy individuals are more likely to indicate a preference for sons if they could only have one child, whereas less wealthy individuals are more likely to indicate a preference for daughters...

Physical attractiveness, while a universally positive quality, contributes even more to women's reproductive success than to men's. The generalized hypothesis would therefore predict that physically attractive parents should have more daughters than sons. Once again, this is the case. Americans who are rated "very attractive" have a 56 percent chance of having a daughter for their first child, compared with 48 percent for everyone else.

7. What Bill Gates and Paul McCartney have in common with criminals

Men simply do not feel like acting violently, stealing, or conducting additional scientific experiments, or they just want to settle down after the birth of their child but they do not know exactly why.

The similarity between Bill Gates, Paul McCartney, and criminals—in fact, among all men throughout evolutionary history—points to an important concept in evolutionary biology: female choice.

Women often say no to men. Men have had to conquer foreign lands, win battles and wars, compose symphonies, author books, write sonnets, paint cathedral ceilings, make scientific discoveries, play in rock bands, and write new computer software in order to impress women so that they will agree to have sex with them. Men have built (and destroyed) civilization in order to impress women, so that they might say yes.

8. The midlife crisis is a myth—sort of

Many middle-aged men do go through midlife crises, but it's not because they are middle-aged. It's because their wives are. From the evolutionary psychological perspective, a man's midlife crisis is precipitated by his wife's imminent menopause and end of her reproductive career, and thus his renewed need to attract younger women.

[Ed: Especially for this, I assume they have some convincing data.]

9. It's natural for politicians to risk everything for an affair (but only if they're male)

Moulay Ismail the Bloodthirsty, the last Sharifian emperor of Morocco, stands out quantitatively, having left more offspring—1,042—than anyone else on record, but he was by no means qualitatively different from other powerful men, like Bill Clinton...

Men strive to attain political power, consciously or unconsciously, in order to have reproductive access to a larger number of women. Reproductive access to women is the goal, political office but one means. To ask why the President of the United States would have a sexual encounter with a young woman is like asking why someone who worked very hard to earn a large sum of money would then spend it.

[Ed: Obviously they didn't consult the economists on cost-benefit analysis. Hurr hurr.]

10. Men sexually harass women because they are not sexist

Psychologist Kingsley R. Browne identifies two types of sexual harassment cases: the quid pro quo ("You must sleep with me if you want to keep your job or be promoted") and the "hostile environment" (the workplace is deemed too sexualized for workers to feel safe and comfortable). While feminists and social scientists tend to explain sexual harassment in terms of "patriarchy" and other ideologies, Browne locates the ultimate cause of both types of sexual harassment in sex differences in mating strategies...

The quid pro quo types of harassment are manifestations of men's greater desire for short-term casual sex and their willingness to use any available means to achieve that goal. Feminists often claim that sexual harassment is "not about sex but about power;" Browne contends it is both—men using power to get sex. "To say that it is only about power makes no more sense than saying that bank robbery is only about guns, not about money.

Sexual harassment cases of the hostile-environment variety result from sex differences in what men and women perceive as "overly sexual" or "hostile" behavior. Many women legitimately complain that they have been subjected to abusive, intimidating, and degrading treatment by their male coworkers. Browne points out that long before women entered the labor force, men subjected each other to such abusive, intimidating, and degrading treatment."

[Ed: I find the heading misleading. It should be rephrased.]"


Although this column reads like a list of "just-so" stories, I'm sure that in their book they have lots of data supporting their arguments.

According to college women : Seventy Percent of men are not marriage material ? - "To be dating material, a man’s got to earn at least $2,025 per month. Sexual relationships, a man’s got to earn about $2,530 per month. Going steady would require about $3,225 per month of income Only men who make more than $4,000 per month will make the grade to qualify for marriage material... These series of scientific findings may also explain Singaporean men’s desire to have foreign spouses, especially those of Chinese or Vietnamese origin. On the day I collected my marriage certificate, my wife remarked that ROM was packed with couples with many wives to be of PRC origin. Perhaps it is easier to benchmark a Singaporean man’s income against a Vietnamese or Chinese scale with our high GDP per capita figures."

Straight Dope Staff Report: Who are the Gypsies? - "How did the Romani people come to be called Gypsies? Anthropology professor Anne Sutherland in Gypsies: The Hidden Americans (1975) says the word Gypsy derives from the time when the Romani entered Western Europe and "represented themselves as Egyptians," the name subsequently evolving into Gypsies. In The Gypsy-American: An Ethnogeographic Study (2002), cultural geographer David Nemeth of the University of Toledo adds some color to the story, which dates back to Romani prehistory, when the first traveling bands arrived in medieval European towns. Their "leaders professed to be Christian [royalty] of a kingdom in the East, which they called 'Little Egypt.' They claimed to have been driven from their Christian land by infidels, meaning the Islamic Turks." Professor Ian Hancock of the University of Texas says there are a few other explanations for the association between "Gypsy" and "Egyptian": One is that Europeans of the time called lots of foreign populations Egyptians; another is that the Romani people stayed in an area called Little Egypt when they first entered Europe."

18 year old offers her virginity for £10,000 - ""I get lots of guys wanting to help me out with my 'problem' - some replies are really creepy. But I got so frustrated with the empty offers that I turned them down."... Asked how she wanted to be paid, the greedy teen replied: "Cash would be perfect but what does £10,000 look like? I don't want to wander round with that much money in case I get robbed." But she got angry when our man asked if she was a prostitute and lying about losing her innocence."

Bad Singing Costs Man's Life - "Romy Baligula, a 29-year-old jobless man, was shot dead Tuesday night in a karaoke bar in San Mateo, Philippines... Frank Sinatra's Song "My Way", a frequent cause of fights and sometimes deaths when patrons sing out of tune, has been taken off at many karaoke bars in Manila."

strange maps - There's no description, so This Is True's: "This one's hard to describe, but it's what happens when you cross a fascination with maps with an overactive imagination. For instance, what if you took a map of the 50 U.S. states and instead of putting on the state names, rename each state with the country whose Gross Domestic Product most closely matches that state? California would be France; Colorado, Finland. Texas (sorry, eh?) would be Canada. Another one: a heat map of Europe in 2071 ...if global warming continues at the current rate. It's fun, interesting, maybe even educational."

The Straight Dope: Whatever happened to adoption of the metric system in the U.S.? - "Opponents of metrication have succeeded in painting it as a one-world plot, with the introduction of an alien system of weights and measures the obvious prelude to a takeover by the Bolsheviks. To this day you'll hear media commentators moaning that recalculating football fields and baseball diamonds in meters threatens the integrity of American sport. Converting to metric will cost money, the critics say, and unless you're involved in foreign trade it confers no benefit."

Man fails exams for 38th time, gets full marks for persistence - "The 73-year-old Indian farmer has been taking - and failing - his high school exams every year since 1969 and has just flunked again for the 38th time. He has vowed not to get married until he passes the exams, which are normally given to schoolchildren at the age of 15... "Once I pass I want to get married to a girl who's under 30," said Yadav."

Army food is 'cheaper than a dog's dinner' - "The Army spends more feeding its dogs than its soldiers, it has been claimed. Figures obtained by a Tory MP show that £1.51 a day goes on meals for troops, compared with £2.63 for military dogs. Even prisoners – who cost £1.87 a day to feed – fare better than servicemen. Schoolchildren get £1.55 for lunch alone."

All the right moves - "The PUA alphabet turns out to be a dizzying cacophony of mind games, all designed to make a woman feel intimately connected to him, painstakingly mapping her psyche for manipulation. And in this day and age it's easily done. Mass culture over the past decade tells us that where once the underlying female instinct in falling in love was the search for security, now we are enslaved to the idea of a soul mate - there is one true love for us out there, one unmatched connection. Luckily for the PUAs that connection is, with the correct training, easily faked. Hence a combination of creative thinking - the pre-prepared photos, the runes, the word association - and obsession with scientific statistics. Men who, in their failure to seduce, were never considered masculine, creep their way in. Absolute power corrupts absolutely and if you have the key, how far do you go with it?... 'Hello Emma!' He fixes me with an unwavering stare and Clintonian double-palmed handshake. There is no one else in the room but he and I. And then, just as quickly, he drops my hand as if it were a bag of cold chips on the high street, and turns his back on me to speak to another girl. I am unanchored. I am bewildered. But mainly I want Mystery to pay attention to me... Would women, I ask, be able to work the equivalent to The Game? 'But you already have it!' says Neil. 'It's the cover of every woman's magazine, of Cosmo and Glamour: "Six tips to get a man". "Six tips to keep him faithful." It's already part of your culture.'"
Emotionally manipulating women is a skill that brings many rewards.

Shanghai Cheerleader Seeks McDonald’s Dishwasher - "The Western world that I’ve seen in movies and TV is just like heaven, with clean streets, unique architecture, and a pure sky. Whether a busy metropolis or a quiet little town, it all appears so warm and fragrant and harmonious... Western men are all brought up in an independent environment. They have the ability to think independently, unlike Chinese men, who parrot the words of others. For example, my classmates: if the central government says Japan and China have good relations, then they would like Japan. When the central government stirs up nationalism, they scream for the overthrow of Japan. None of them has brains. They are just someone else’s monkey, but think themselves so grand. They are all just a bunch of pig heads."