"The happiest place on earth"

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Sunday, May 24, 2009

"I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert." - Demetri Martin


SPURNED LOVER 1: DID SHE BREAK LAW BY BARGING INTO HOME? She climbs through window & lies on floor - "Annie also claimed that the woman sent a private Facebook message to Sarah about a month after she went to their house. Sarah showed The New Paper the messages, in which the woman repeatedly said how much she loved Tom. At one point she wrote: 'Your dad belongs to me.' Sarah said: 'We were so angry. We told her to get out of our lives.' The woman has since deleted her Facebook account. Does sending such messages amount to harassment? Mr Singh said that it is unlikely to be harassment because the children replied to the woman, which possibly invited further replies from the woman."
This is why you MUST ignore stalkers

Ancient clay has internal clock - "Fired clay ceramics start to react chemically with atmospheric moisture as soon as it is removed from the kiln. Researchers believe they can pinpoint the precise age of materials like brick, tile and pottery by calculating how much its weight has changed... They have established that their technique can be used to determine the age of objects up to 2,000 years old but believe it has the potential to be used to date samples around 10,000 years old."
I can't wait to see what nonsense the Creationists come up with to attempt to invalidate this.

The High Cost of Poverty: Why the Poor Pay More - "The poorer you are, the more things cost. More in money, time, hassle, exhaustion, menace. This is a fact of life that reality television and magazines don't often explain."

Former fundamentalist 'debunks' Bible - "Ehrman, a best-selling author and a professor of religious studies at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, is a biblical sleuth whose investigations make some people very angry. Like the fictional Robert Langdon character played by actor Tom Hanks in the movie "Angels & Demons," he delves into the past to challenge some of Christianity's central claims... Ehrman says that no one accepts everything in the Bible. Everyone picks and chooses . He cites some New Testament's references to the role of women in church as an example... His claims, though, take on some of Christianity's most sacred tenets, like the resurrection of Jesus. Ehrman says he doesn't think the resurrection took place. There's no proof Jesus physically rose from the dead, and the resurrection stories contradict one another, he says... Ehrman says he immerses himself in the Bible, though he doesn't believe in its infallibility, because it's the most important book in Western civilization. "I have friends who teach medieval English," he says. "They don't believe in Chaucer, but they think Chaucer is important," he writes in the conclusion of "Jesus, Interrupted.""

USB Flash Memory (2GB)
- "USB drive transforms into an awesome Decepticon jungle cat."

Klingon Anti-Virus - "Now even Klingon speakers can scan their computers for security threats."

Onward, Christian soldiers! - "These never-before-seen documents from the Rumsfeld Pentagon mixed religion and war. In the days surrounding the U.S. invasion of Iraq, cover sheets... began adorning top-secret intelligence briefings... The sheets juxtaposed war images with inspirational Bible quotes"
Another reason why Security is very important

The greatest videogame trailer ever created - "Prepare yourself. You are about to watch a trailer for upcoming Japanese WiiWare game Muscle March that will include the following:
* Constellations in the shape of muscles
* Rainbows
* Sheep
* More penises than you can count
* An old man making masturbatory motions
* Men in Speedos running really fast
* Men in Speedos running really fast and breaking through walls
* A polar bear in a diaper"

Perfectly Happy - "IF YOU WERE given the choice, and you wanted to reduce human suffering by as much as possible, would you cure blindness or back pain?... in fact, it's back pain that causes more misery... our inability to predict how well people adapt to traumas leads to excessively large awards in personal injury lawsuits. Jurors and judges overcompensate plaintiffs for their suffering, he argued, because they are unable to believe that a disabled life can be a happy one... the emphasis on lost enjoyment of life in jury awards actually makes it harder for the plaintiff to recover"

Emotional Intelligence, Cognitive Intelligence, and Job Performance - "We develop and test a compensatory model that posits that the association between emotional intelligence and job performance becomes more positive as cognitive intelligence decreases... Despite the popular interest, there is a paucity of studies on how emotional intelligence is related to job performance... This uncertainty has contributed, in part, to criticisms of the scientific status of emotional intelligence in organizational research... Our results reveal that employees with low cognitive intelligence perform tasks correctly and engage in OCBO frequently if they are emotionally intelligent"
Translation: "EQ" matters if you're dumb

First-care-army.org - "Your participation in this vital email campaign will protect young mothers and the un-born and ensure their lives are not forsaken. We urge you to watch our compelling video."
Their video is quite slick (if a bit too unstable in terms of cinematography. And interestingly, they're not taking a "we must ban abortion" but a "let them know there is an alternative" stance.

SecretTweet: 41770 - "I work hard to make sure to provide a good life for my family, my wife is angry at me for all the hours away from home. I'm Screwed."

Chinese ordered to smoke more to boost economy - "Officials burst unannounced into the school at around 3pm one afternoon and started sifting through the ashtray and bins in the staff-room. Three "non-compliant" cigarette butts were discovered by the "cigarette marketing consolidate team" which informed the teacher he had violated the related civil servants "cigarette usage rule" After some negotiation the school was spared a fine, but subjected to "public criticism" for "undisciplined practices"."

Dolphins seen trying to kill calf - "It is the first record of these dolphins attempting infanticide."

2 Russian tourists challenge Florida law prohibiting sex with porcupines - "Obviously, the two learned nothing from the story of the Russian man who in January lost half of his penis after trying to force a raccoon into oral sex."

Suicide jumper pushed off bridge - ""I pushed him off because jumpers like Chen are very selfish. Their actions violate a lot of public interests,""

What troubling is not what the Pope said in Israel, but who he was and that he was chosen - "Clearly, just because an individual has a dark chapter in his past -- whether it was a mistake or a failure to make a choice to resist an ultimate evil -- that does not disqualify him from having a life of value or accomplishment. However, when elevating such men (or women) to prominent, powerful, and richly symbolic posts, the characteristics of these individuals in question often become secondary to the role those characteristics and the reaction to them play in the selection process."
Translation: what you did when you were young will be held against you for the rest of your life. So never do anything that could ever be controversial.
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