"My Hobby: Sitting down the grad students and timing how long it takes them to figure out that I'm not actually an expert in their field.

Engineering: 'Our big problem is heat dissipation'
'Have you tried logarithms?'
48 seconds

Linguistics: 'Ah, so does this Finno-Ugric family include, say, Klingon?'
63 seconds

Sociology: 'Yeah, my latest work is on ranking people from best to worst'
4 minutes

Literary criticism: 'You see, the deconstruction is inextricable from not only the text, but also the self.'
Eight papers and two books and they haven't caught on."