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Showing posts with label motivational shit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label motivational shit. Show all posts

Sunday, July 14, 2024

Being What You Want To Be

OodleNoodleRoodle — jumpingjacktrash: neminine: ...

“And remember: the sky is the limit! You can be anything you want to be!”

“Thank you. I want to be a secretary.”

That stopped them short. “What?”

“A secretary,” she repeated.

“But…” they trailed off, dumbfounded. “Why? You could be a CEO, a scientist, a law–”

“I don’t want to be a CEO,” she said. “I want to be a secretary.” 

They scoffed. “You want to answer phones all day?”

She smiled. “Yes.”

“Schedule appointments?”

“I like organizing.”

“Be a second banana?”

An affirmative nod. “I’m skilled at helping.”

“I just don’t understand,” they said. “HOW could you be okay with all of this?!”

“I enjoy the work.”

“BUT YOU CAN BE WHATEVER YOU WANT TO BE!”

“I know.”

“Then WHY?!”

She shrugged.

“Because I want to be a secretary.”

 

Comments:

"Honestly though, this is very similar to my mom’s experience. She’s always been super bright, but has realized as she’s gotten older that intellectual pursuits just aren’t her jam. She dropped out of her PhD program to have kids, and although she has her master’s and was a pretty good school psychologist, she hated having to make huge decisions. She’s a church secretary now and loves it, and she’s GOOD at it; she’s letting her school psych certification permanently expire this year with zero regrets. If you can be anything you want, that includes the things we don’t tend to value as highly as a society. Not everybody is built for or wants the “respectable” careers."

"My grandma did this to me, saying that i didn’t want to get stuck on the outside, making coffee and filing papers. The thing is, that’s exactly what I’ve always enjoyed the most, making and organizing things. That would be enough for me."

"Nobody seems to realize that if you tell people they can be anything they want to be they will. And not everyone WANTS to be doctors or lawyers or CEOs or scientists. Sometimes, they just want to be a secretary."

 

"When I was in uni I was tricked into participating in this day-long workshop thing about like your future goals and stuff. And one of the things they did was like, pick a goal and then visualise the steps to that goal. So for the sake of this workshop I said my goal was to be a lecturer in art school. And the person running the thing was like “mm how about dean or department head instead” (like trying to make the goal higher). And like, I’ve talked to the department head and he was always griping about how he doesn’t get to do any actual teaching or interacting with the students anymore (and neither does he have time to do his own art). And I’d obviously never even met the dean, like, deans don’t interact with students at all.

I like teaching and interacting with students and helping people realise their own projects and visions. I would never want to be a department head or dean, jeez.

Not everyone wants money and power, John."

Thursday, December 14, 2023

Struggle and Personal Development

A popular sentiment nowadays:

 

M-C on X

"The universe can be divided into two kinds of people:
1. I had to go through it, so you should too.
2. I had to go through it, so l’ll work to make sure you don’t.
Always try to be the second one." 

 

mxdshipwreck.bsky.social 💀 🎃 on X

"If you suffered in life and want other people to suffer as you did because "you turned out fine," you did not in fact turn out fine."

 

Of course, we know that making life as easy as possible leads to sub-optimal outcomes. For example, helicopter parenting is associated with mental health issues like anxiety and depression:

In 2010, a study by researcher Neil Montgomery, a psychologist at Keene State College in New Hampshire, found that overprotective parents might have a lasting impact on their child’s personality by prolonging childhood and adolescence. Approximately 300 college freshmen were surveyed about their level of agreement with statements regarding their parents’ involvement in their lives. The results showed that 10 percent of the participants had helicopter parents. The research also revealed that students with helicopter parents tended to be less open to new ideas and actions, and were more vulnerable, anxious, dependent, and self-conscious.

A 2016 study from the National University of Singapore published in the Journal of Personality indicated that children with intrusive parents who had high expectations for academic performance, or who overreacted when they made a mistake, tend to be more self-critical, anxious, or depressed. The researchers termed this as “maladaptive perfectionism,” or a tendency in children of helicopter parents to be afraid of making mistakes and to blame themselves for not being perfect. This happens because the parents are essentially—whether by their words or actions—indicating to their kids that what they do is never good enough.

Another 2016 study evaluated questionnaires about parenting completed by 377 students from a Midwestern university. Students responded to statements about the type of parents they have, how often they communicate with their parents, and how much their parents intrude in their lives. The students also completed a number of tests to discern their decision-making skills, academic performance, and symptoms of anxiety and depression. Results showed that higher overall helicopter parenting scores were associated with stronger symptoms of anxiety and depression.

According to that study, helicopter parenting “was also associated with poorer functioning in emotional functioning, decision making, and academic functioning. Parents’ information-seeking behaviors, when done in absences of other [helicopter parenting] behaviors, were associated with better decision making and academic functioning.”

In addition, the journal Cognitive Therapy and Research published research in 2017 suggesting that helicopter parenting can trigger anxiety in kids who already struggle with some social issues. A group of children and their parents were asked to complete as many puzzles as possible in a 10-minute time period. Parents were allowed to help their children, but not encouraged to do so.

Researchers noted that the parents of children with social issues touched the puzzles more often than the other parents did. Though they were not critical or negative, they stepped in even when their children did not ask for help. Researchers think this indicates that parents of socially anxious children may perceive challenges to be more threatening than the child thinks they are. Over time, this can diminish a child’s ability to succeed on their own and potentially increase anxiety.

More poetically, we have this classic story:

A man spent hours watching a butterfly struggling to emerge from its cocoon. It managed to make a small hole, but its body was too large to get through it. After a long struggle, it appeared to be exhausted and remained absolutely still.
 
The man decided to help the butterfly and, with a pair of scissors, he cut open the cocoon, thus releasing the butterfly. However, the butterfly’s body was very small and wrinkled and its wings were all crumpled.
 
The man continued to watch, hoping that, at any moment, the butterfly would open its wings and fly away. Nothing happened; in fact, the butterfly spent the rest of its brief life dragging around its shrunken body and shrivelled wings, incapable of flight.
 
What the man – out of kindness and his eagerness to help – had failed to understand was that the tight cocoon and the efforts that the butterfly had to make in order to squeeze out of that tiny hole were Nature’s way of training the butterfly and of strengthening its wings.
 
Sometimes, a little extra effort is precisely what prepares us for the next obstacle to be faced. Anyone who refuses to make that effort, or gets the wrong sort of help, is left unprepared to fight the next battle and never manages to fly off to their destiny.

Saturday, June 10, 2023

The Giving Tree


Tree: "I am sorry, I wish I could give you something, but I have nothing left."
Man: "I don't need very much now. Just a place to sit and rest." *falls asleep/dies*
Tree: "Finally. Time to give back"
*Night time with tree roots around skeleton and new growth from trunk*
*strangetrek*

Related:

CMV:The Giving Tree is a story with horrible morals. : changemyview

"I am currently having this discussion with my wife. Both of us had the book read to us as children and my wife now reads it to our 2 year old. I can't stand this book. I believe it to be the personification of entitlement. For those unfamiliar, a tree (most likely signifying parents) provides a boy with anything he needs until he takes everything the tree can give leaving only the stump. The boy is absent when he doesn't want things and openly complains about what the tree offers. There is no thanks given by the boy at anytime and no acknowledgement that he is damaging the tree beyond repair.

I get the notions of self sacrifice that go into being a parent. I understand that I would probably do the same to make sure my own child lived a happy life. But I don't want to encourage this notion of desecration without though for stewardship or appreciation for the gifts being given."

Wednesday, November 09, 2022

Uninspirational Quotes

By Brian Bilston

Uninspirational Quotes 

"No matter how big the problem,
it's never too late to run away." 

"Every morning is another chance
to have an even more awful day." 

"Remember, no task is too immense —
the word itself says "I'm mense". 

"Regard Life not as a competition,
more as a sequence of non-events." 

"Inside every opportunity is
a disappointment waiting to happen." 

"Never be overawed by your ordinariness.
Make it your passion." 

"It's not about the winning or losing,
it's the falling apart that counts." 

"Let adversity be your trampoline —
one that's broken and won't make you bounce." 

"It takes seventeen muscles to smile
but fewer than that to frown." 

"An inspirational quote is like a parachute —
it can really get you down."

Friday, July 15, 2022

Money and going into the Arts

Money, generational wealth, and the reality of making it in the arts

""Not long ago, my wife, a composer, asked me if I would ever advise a student from a low-income family to pursue a career in the arts. I am a writer, librettist, and an arts and literature teacher. I thought the answer was obvious.

“What do you mean? Of course.”

“But they don’t have money.”

“If a student were really passionate and talented, she’d figure out a way.” That’s always been something my parents told me. “Think about what you’d do if money were no object, and then work hard. You’ll find a way to make money.”

“Your parents give you $28,000 a year. They paid for your tuition. They made it possible for you to do what you’d do if money were no object — because money was no object for you.”...

“You would tell a low-income student to go for it? Take out the loans?”

The truth is, I’ve never actually been asked that by a student from a low-income family. despite the fact that I have taught English, drama, and opera composition in low-income communities — and a few students have even enjoyed my classes. The reason, I’m guessing, is that for the most part, they’ve already ruled that out, likely because they have never met someone who actually acts, sings, writes, or plays an instrument for a living.

Usually students say they want to be doctors or social workers or lawyers, sometimes professional athletes. When students tell me they want to be professional athletes, I always ask, “What’s your backup plan?” Sure, some might make it. But most of them won’t. With sports, though, it sorts itself out pretty quickly. The students get the college scholarship or they don’t. I don’t really have to discourage them. I just have to say, maybe have a backup.

But if students want to pursue the arts, they may be accepted to an arts program without a scholarship and find themselves $200,000 in debt before realizing they aren’t going to be able to get a real paycheck with their arts degree — at least in the next decade. Sure, there are exceptions. But for every exception, there are many more people who are impoverished by their arts education or by working part-time or temporary jobs as they struggle early in their careers...

My wife, who lived with student loans, pushed me to continue thinking beyond the often unrealistic narrative that all it takes is talent and work.  

We spend a lot of time in the New York City theater scene talking about ways to create more performance opportunities for “new voices,” meaning historically underrepresented groups, such as women and people of color. We talk about ways society as a whole tends to favor straight white guys and how that manifests itself in the arts. And while these conversations are important, and while I agree that society is, often, skewed to favor those SWGs (bless their hearts), it’s amazing how little time we spend discussing the largest, most obvious barrier to new voices in the arts: money...

$28,000 is a dollar figure familiar to children of the wealthy. It’s the maximum amount a couple can give to an individual tax-free. Wealthy individuals are frequently advised by their accountants to do this to avoid the (quite low) inheritance tax. It results in free income for wealthy kids. I don’t even report it to the IRS — and that’s entirely legal. I could get this money every year for the rest of my life, or as long as my parents choose to give it to me, without having to lift a finger. I took the money, spent part of it helping my then-boyfriend pay off his student loans, and put the rest in the bank...

$28,000. A person in my home state of Missouri can work 40 hours a week, 52 weeks a year, and make only $16,328, and still have to pay tax on it. So what does this $28,000 a year mean to me as an artist? The biggest thing it buys is time. Instead of working 50 to 60 hours a week at “survival jobs,” like many of my art school friends, I was working 20 to 30 hours a week, which included reffing for an adult sports league, “matchmaking” for a dating company, typing payroll for a law firm, and coordinating for a youth tennis league.

I was able to use the remaining time to write. I was able to take fulfilling, career-enhancing teaching artist residencies, participate in a well-connected biweekly workshop, and network through an unpaid internship, all of which helped get my career started — none of which I could have done with a full-time job.

I could also cover the “little things.” When my hard drive crashed, I just went to the Apple store that day and picked up a new $1,000 MacBook Air. I had money to pay for recordings and submission fees for workshops and contests. I wasn’t living extravagantly, and I wasn’t putting away enough to retire, but I could keep pushing ahead in my career in those crucial years immediately after school...

Finally, at age 33, I can earn my own way and still move forward in an arts career.

All it took was a hell of a lot of work and nearly half a million dollars from my parents...

At the very least, we can require the children of the wealthy, people like me, to pay a reasonable amount of taxes on their income. Employers and contract workers have to report wages of $600. Why wouldn’t we require rich kids to report gifts of $28,000 and pay taxes?

We can also lower the amount of inheritance that can be passed along tax-free upon death. The latest tax bill just increased the amount that kids can inherit tax-free from their parents from $10.98 million (per couple) to $22.4 million. (Money above that is taxed at 40 percent.) That’s $22.4 million of unearned income for the children of the rich. The wealthy, including my parents, paid taxes when they earned it, of course. And they are entitled to give it away as they please. But we adult children of the wealthy should have to report our income, regardless of the source.

If we work to reverse this income gap through public policy, we also help disrupt the feudal artist-patron problem, which, again, is a barrier to new voices"

 

How many privileged scions of wealthy families trick those from poor ones into going into the arts, doing bohemian jobs and living in poverty? Then they will bitch about how capitalism is oppressive and we need a revolution

It's weird how her solution is for even more state intervention and state money (the unspoken assumption is apparently that the government will take all this money they will certainly raise from raising taxes [because tax avoidance and tax evasion aren't things] and use it to fund artists directly)

This is even worse than the writer whose husband (IIRC, and in some American [of course] publication - maybe the NYT) reminded her that she could only go into the arts because her family was rich, and she briefly considered if she should tell kids she talked to about the arts that before telling them to follow their passions, but finally decided that she should keep quiet and let them pursue their dreams because she had gained so much from it. Ahh... privilege!


Related:

ReThink That Poetry Degree! Student Loan Defaults by the Numbers

"the Fed issued an analysis entitled “Who Is More Likely to Default on Student Loans?”...

Arts and Humanities majors default at than other types of graduates.
STEM graduates default at the lowest rate, but it is not a much lower rate than that for Business and Vocational graduates.
Students attending non-selective colleges have higher default rates no matter what their major...

       Across the board, attending a four-year private, for-profit college correlates most strongly with the likelihood of defaulting on student loans.  Dropping out is the second strongest variable related to defaults.  

The long-term implication, of course, is that “life outcomes,” such as the ability to buy a home and also maintain a healthy credit score, will vary greatly among student loan holders based on their educational choices and family backgrounds."

Thursday, November 04, 2021

Xi Jinping and Eggs

There is a story that periodically gets shared on social media about lessons Xi Jinping purportedly learnt from his father, told in Xi's voice (e.g. on Successpedia Asia).

I will paste the full text at the end of this post, but for now I will just note that it involves eggs and noodles and the morals of the story are to note take advantage of others as appearances may be deceiving, not to trust too much in previous experiences and that if you think of others, you will get good luck. No wonder that this sort of insipid drivel gets widely shared, as it strikes all the usual feel-good notes and comes with clear morals.

If nothing else, it is questionable if Xi Dada would deign to have such a story told about him. However, other things clue us in to the fact that this is almost certainly not by/about Xi.

For one, the Mandarin version of this story is in Traditional characters - which are not used on the Mainland. Xi, or someone approved by him, chronicling the story using Traditional characters would be a huge boo-boo (and someone transcribing the words into Traditional characters to make Xi look bad is a story that only a China shill could and would believe).

For another, given the cult of personality, it beggars belief that he would admit to being "a selfish child" who "never consider the feelings of others", whose "companions left me one by one".

Digging around, the earliest version of the story (in English) is found on Accountancy Asia (which Successpedia Asia also credits for the story) dated April 4, 2018, but the source is dodgy at best:

I read a recent message about the lessons he learned from his father while he was young and the influence on him. The lessons about truth, experience and generosity was very well encapsulated in this short story.

No details are given about where James Lee (the post's author) read the message. Given that Accountancy Asia is filled with the usual Business content (buzzwords and motivational nonsense), this does not fill us with confidence about the provenance of the story. Interestingly, James Lee is from Singapore, so it is unlikely that he transcribed the anecdote into Traditional characters (though the text raises more questions - for example some characters are in Simplified Mandarin ("事业" vs "事業").

Searching in Mandarin is more fruitful.

One search result is from Cofacts, a Taiwanese website, and credits the story to 李嘉誠 (Li Ka-shing). Given that Li Ka-shing is a Hong Kong-er, the Traditional characters at least cohere more with the purported author of the piece. However, if Li Ka-shing had really said that, there would surely be some English version of the story credited to him. As it is, there're only 354 Google hits for Li Ka-shing (in Chinese characters) and part of the text of the story (in Mandarin). Interestingly, this compares to 2,010 results for Xi Jinping's name (习近平, in Chinese characters) and the same text string - I guess it's clear who is more popular.

Tellingly, the earliest Mandarin version of the story (with Xi Jinping's name) is also Accountancy Asia. So it seems this is ground zero of the story being attributed to Xi Jinping, in both English and Mandarin.

Looking for the Mandarin text (without attributing it to either gentleman), one finds the earliest version (at least according to Google) dating to Jul 4, 2014, published on a Taiwanese website 學習電子報, whose mission (according to its banner) is to share short stories with big morals. So this whole egg story seems to have been written by them as one of the usual Chinese morality tales. It even comes with even more moralising at the bottom, which I will reproduce at the bottom of this post.

Original story text (in both English and Mandarin) posted on Accountancy Asia:

As a child, I was a selfish child.
I always think of myself first with good things, never consider the feelings of others.
As a result, the companions left me one by one. I am very upset over it, and laid the blame to others.

One night, my father cooked two bowls of noodles. There was a white egg on one bowl and none on the other.
My father asked me, which bowl you prefer?
During then, eggs were very precious food. It was only on a festive or occasion like birthday that we had the privilege having egg in a meal.
I would not miss such opportunity and with no hesitation, I chose the bowl with eggs.
My choice was wrong. I was surprised that my father’s bowl actually contained two eggs underneath the noddle.
I regretted it and hated myself for being too impatient.
Noticed my reaction, my father smiled and said to me:
“Son, you must remember, what is visible to the eye might not be true, one who want to take advantage of others will eventually suffer a big loss.”

The next night, my father cooked two bowls of noodles again.
There was still a white egg on one bowl and none on the other.
My father asked me to choose. I learned from the previous experience and chose the bowl with no eggs on the surface.
The father watched me silently and did not utter a word.
I quickly picked up the chopsticks, stirred the noodles to find the eggs underneath it.
I was disappointed that there was no egg except the soup and noodle in the bowl.
At this time, my father said to me thoughtfully:
“Son, you must remember, do not trust too much in previous experience, as life sometimes deceives you.
However, you don’t have to worry or sad over it. Life experience is something you cannot learn from textbook.”

On the third night, my father cooked two bowls of noodles.
It looked exactly the same as the previous nights.
My father asked me to choose and I did not act rashly.
Instead, I said to my father:
“Dad, you have sacrificed so much for me and this family and you get to choose out of my respect to you!”
The father did not decline and chose the bowl with an egg on it.
I guess there was definitely no egg in the other bowl. To my surprise, I had two white eggs underneath the noodle in the bowl.
My father looked up and his eyes was full of kindness. He said to me lightly:
“Son, you must remember, when you think about others, good luck will bestow upon you.”
I was stunned.

Since then, I have taken these three lessons as my principles of life. Regardless of whether it is for people or things, the first thing that comes to mind is always the interests of others. As my father rightfully said it, luck bestow upon me one after another. My career testifies to the principles of life I learned from my father.

 

中国国家主席习近平的父亲送給他的三句話:

小時候,我是一個自私的孩子,
有什麼好的東西,我总是想到自己,
從不顾及別人的感受,
結果同伴一個個离我而去。
為此,我十分苦惱,
常常在背后指責別人的不是。

一天晚上,父亲煮了两碗面,
一碗面上有一顆白生生的鸡蛋,
而另一碗面看上去什麼都沒有。

父亲問我,你吃哪一碗?

那時鸡蛋是十分珍貴的食品,
若非逢年過節或生日,是很难吃到的,
我當然不會放過這樣的機會。
於是,我毫不猶豫地选择了有鸡蛋的那一碗。

事實上,我的选择是错误的,
正當我洋洋得意地吃完那顆鸡蛋時,
我驚訝地发現父亲的碗底竟然藏著两顆鸡蛋,
我後悔不已,恨自己過於心急。

見此,父親微笑著對我說:
「孩子,你务必記住,
眼睛看到的未必是真实的,
想占別人便宜的人最終會吃大亏。

第二天晚上,父亲又煮了兩碗面,
仍然是一碗面上有一顆白生生的鸡蛋,
而另一碗面看上去什麼都沒有。

父亲让我选择,這一次我學乖了,
选择了面上沒有雞蛋的那碗。
父親默默地注視著我,一句話也沒說。

我趕緊拿起筷子,將上面的面條扒開,
我滿以為下面會臥著兩顆白生生的鸡蛋,
但很快我失望地發現,碗底除了清湯,什麼也沒有。

這時,父亲意味深長地對我說:
「孩子,你一定要記住,
不要過分相信以往的經驗,
因為生活有時也會欺騙你。

不過,你不用氣惱,也不用悲伤,
全當是一次人生体验吧,
這是你從书本上無法學到的東西。」

第三天晚上,父亲同樣煮了兩碗面,
還是一碗面上有一顆白生生的鸡蛋,
而另一碗面看上去什麼都沒有。

父亲讓我先选,這一次我沒有貿然行事,
而是情真意切地對父亲說:
「爸爸,您是長輩!又為我和這個家庭付出了太多,還是您先選吧!」

父亲沒有推辭,直接选了上面有一顆鸡蛋的那碗。

我猜想,剩下的那碗肯定沒有鸡蛋,
但出乎意料的是,我非常幸運,碗底臥着两顆白生生的鸡蛋。

父亲抬起頭,眼里滿是慈愛,他淡淡地對我說:
「孩子,你千萬要記住,
當你為別人着想时,好運就會降临到你的頭上。

父亲的話令我慚愧不已。

從那以後,我把這三句話當作了自己的人生準則,无论是為人还是处事,我首先想到的总是別人的利益,果然如父亲所言,好运接踵而至,我的事业也做得風生水起。
~ 习近平

 

Moralistic postscript from Taiwanese website 學習電子報: 

報長閱讀心得:

教育孩子,是需要完整性的,最忌諱半調子,像文章中的父親 笑遊人間就覺得他的教育方式很棒,他同一件事用了三天的時間,教育孩子三個道理:

一、孩子,你務必記住,眼睛看到的未必是真實的,想佔別人便宜的人最終會吃大虧。

二、孩子,你一定要記住,不要過分相信以往的經驗,因為生活有時也會欺騙你。

三、孩子,你千萬要記住,當你為別人著想時,好運就會降臨到你的頭上。

但…若能再多上一點:「孩子,你千萬要記住,當你為別人著想時,某些人未必會替你著想,但千萬不要因為這少數的人而放棄你良善的心」,那應該就會更完整了。
 

而半調子的教育,就像 學習電子報所分享的第一篇電子報 分蘋果的故事,文中的第二位媽媽,原本是想教育出懂得分享、懂得為人著想的孩子,但最後卻教育出一個自私又會說謊欺騙的孩子。

其原因就在於,小孩看透了媽媽的心思,表面上做到媽媽希望他做的事來獲得他所想要的結果,而媽媽卻看不透小孩的心思,而一步一步的教育出一個會鑽漏洞、懂的做表面、說謊欺騙的孩子出來。

本文中的父親就不同了,他看透了孩子的心思,所以同一件事用了三天的時間來教育孩子,矯正孩子在教育中所產生出來的偏差想法。

家庭的教育與學校的教育都是同等重要,學校教導著學生們各種知識,而家庭卻是教育孩子們的行為與品性,並矯正孩子在教育過程中所產生出來的偏差想法。








Rough translation:

Newspaper's commentary:

One needs to be holistic in educating children. The most taboo half-tone [?] is like the father in the article who, laughing, thinks his method of teaching is great. With the same method, he taught his child 3 morals over 3 days:

1) My child, you need to remember that what you can say may not necessarily be true. Those who want to take advantage of others will suffer greatly in the end.

2) My child, you must remember not to be too trusting of past experiences, because life sometimes tricks on you.

3) My child, you absolutely must keep in mind that when you are considerate of others, fortune will smile on you.

But... you can add: "My child, you can never forget that when you are considerate of others, some people may not do likewise to you. Yet, don't let this small minority make you give up your good heart." That would make it even more complete.

And half-tone [?] education is like the story of dividing the apple found in the first edition of the learning e-newsletter. The second mother in that story originally wanted to raise a child who knew how to share and be considerate of others, and in the end raised one who was selfish and lied and deceived others.

The reason for that was that the child divined his mother's ulterior motives and did what his mother wanted to get what he wanted, but the mother was unaware of this and steadily raised a kid who was good at finding loopholes, keep up appearances, tell lies and deceive others.

The father in this story is different. He could read his child's mind, so he used the same method to teach his child over 3 days, correcting the deviant thoughts that arose in the child during the process of instruction.

Home and school instruction are equally important.  Schools impart knowledge, while at home behavior and character are taught, and deviant thoughts that arise in the child during the process of instruction are corrected.

Thursday, April 02, 2020

Never waste a good crisis: Coronavirus edition

Liberals are currently rubbing their hands about the social engineering they can indulge in under cover of the coronavirus (there's plenty of idiocy on 'the other side' too, but I will save that for another post).

The fullest and most strident expression of this sentiment I've seen so far:

Vye Zarin

"The world will never be the same after we recover from COVlD-19.

Every time the government said they couldn't find money for a program that benefited citizens, a lie.

Every time your manager said your job couldn't be done from home, a lie.

Every college class that couldn't be taught online, a lie.

The government could never allow universal healthcare, a lie.

When the world heals, remember the lies they shoved in our faces our entire lives

Remember the insider trading that won't ever be held accountable allowing the rich to make even more millions while we lose everything.

Universal healthcare, student loan debt forgiveness, affordable education, livable wages and affordable housing are the pillars we need our government to address.

call out their lies because this virus is showing us the real enemies of humanity now"

(It will come as no surprise to the reader that the poster's Facebook cover photo currently features Marx, Engels, Lenin, Stalin and Mao)

Spot on comment on a friend's Facebook:

"oh please this is another bullshit, there are things that can be tolerated temporarily but cannot be done long term. just because you can tolerate a moment of pain doesn't mean you can live in a life with every moment in pain. just because a man can run a 100m in 10s doesn't mean he can run 1km in 100s. just because he can create a moment of miracle doesn't mean he can create a lifetime of miracles. this is why people don't deserve good things, give them a bone and they expect you to feed them for life."

More succinctly (on the same page):

"I can hold my breath underwater.

This means I must be able to stay there indefinitely!"


An even more idiotic comment I saw was from a communist who claimed that all developed countries could afford to provide food, shelter and healthcare to all their citizens (normally), and should. Maybe he thought printing money was the way to fund all this.

Wednesday, February 19, 2020

Scar as a Motivational Guru


"Scar help me I'm slipping"
"Self care is cutting toxic people from your life"
"WHAT"
"YOU ARE SO VALID"
"what the heck"
"Good vibes only"
"This sparks joy"

Smee Bucket: "I hate these phrases so much and for some reason I always imagine Scar saying them?"

Sunday, July 21, 2019

Prioritising what matters

NUSWhispers - Posts

"Many years ago, one of my modules’ lab exam was rescheduled to an evening session which clashed with my gf’s birthday (we booked a special dinner). An added complication was that it was her first birthday in Singapore without any family members around. It was either I celebrate her birthday with her and get a reduced grade or she ‘celebrates’ alone while I may get a higher grade.

I was very inclined towards attending the lab session and she also said she’s ok to spend dinnertime alone. However, I decided to heck it and yolo by skipping the lab session and going for dinner with her instead. She was shocked and asked why. I told her, “In 10 years’ time, my grade won’t matter. You will.”

Needless to say, I got a poorer grade for that module for skipping a lab exam without valid excuse. But boy, did it feel saccharine.

Fast forward 5 years later, we broke up.

Fast forward another 5 years (i.e. now), here I am clutching the rejection letter from a prestigious masters course and they cited my inadequate grades and pointed that module out in particular (it was a foundational module).

Fml."

Thursday, June 13, 2019

Knowing when to quit

Knowing when to quit | LinkedIn

On May 22, 2019, Mount Everest saw a traffic jam as 300 mountaineers made it to the summit that day, creating a traffic jam, a picture of which went viral the next day. German alpinist, David Gottler, was not among those who summited. He was just 200 meters from the peak when he turned back. David was also among the lucky ones, This spring, the Everest climb saw 21 mountaineers die while attempting to scale the world’s highest peak – the highest number to die so far!

Why did he turn back despite being an experienced climber who had already conquered five of the 14 different 8000m peaks on Earth, reaching the summits of Gasherbrum II (8035m), Broad Peak (8051m), Dhaulagiri (8167m), Lhotse (8516m) and Makalu (8481m), as well as ascending to 8200m on K2 (8611m)? He took a crucial decision. That day that the risks were way too much to attempt to summit despite being so close.

His experience told him that the crowd trying to reach the peak would make him wait for his turn which could prove fatal as above 26,000 feet you are in the death zone when there isn’t enough oxygen for humans to breathe. The summit of Mount Everest is 8,848 meters (29,029 feet) high, an elevation at which each breath contains only one-third of the oxygen found at sea level. And David was a purist who was climbing without supplemental oxygen.

At only 200 meters from the peak David took perhaps the most sensible and courageous decision of his life – to give up the climb and come down. He didn’t win the mountain that day, but he won over his ego. Only a man without an ego can decide when to give up and when to clench your teeth and push on regardless.

All our lives we have been constantly told by motivational speakers and others, never to give up and yet here was an experienced mountaineer who simply says that making it to the peak is not all that matters, when even the less experienced ones were summiting that day.

There were many who went up that day, but in the process exhausted their oxygen supplies while waiting for the queue of other mountaineers to clear up before they could summit. Some of them ran out of oxygen on the way down and died. The true climbers respect the mountains and as Sir Edmund Hillary, the first man to set foot on Mount Everest said; “Human life is far more important than just getting to the top of a mountain.” There are climbers who climb to enjoy the view and not always to plant a flag on the peak. Sometimes in our lives it is more important on how we enjoy living than how “successful” we are in the eyes of others or even ourselves. Quitting takes a lot of courage and sometimes only the wise can give up even when success seems so near. They always ask themselves: What is the cost of winning? Is it worth to scale the summit?

Sunday, January 06, 2019

The Greatest Failures

X-Culture - Posts

I collect failure stories. Some other time, I'll share some of my own failure stories. Here are my top 3 failures from the business world.

I like books that detail failures much more than books that detail success. "Losing the Signal" is way more educational than "7 Habits of Successful People".

KODAK was the king of photography. By and large, Kodak invented the photography as we knew it in the 20th century. They perfected the technology and by the 1990s a Kodak kiosk was pretty much on every corner of every city around the world. Then, in the late 1990s digital photography started becoming a thing, and Kodak completely ignored it. Some would say that's the fate of all "old" players, but Nikon and Cannon embraced digital and emerged as top players again, while Kodak kept dismissing the new technology until in 2012 it filed for bankruptcy. Even though the company is still around, kids younger than 18 probably won't even recognize this name.
More on the Kodak failure in "Out of Focus: The story of how Kodak lost its direction" by J. Larish.

NOKIA was the king of mobile telephony. A true global player. Almost a monopoly in some countries. Flush with money and sitting on thousands of patents pertaining to mobile phones. In 2000 Nokia accounted for 70% of Helsinki's stock exchange market capital, 43% of Finland's R&D, 21% of total exports, and 14% of corporate tax revenues. Then along came the smartphones. First the BlackBerry and then iPhone changed how we use our phones, and Nokia completely missed the wave of mobile email, touchscreens and app stores. In the late 2000s Nokia finally tried to catch up, but it was too late. Embarrassingly, they did have a big early warning in the form of BlackBerry, and they missed it. Then, of course, when iPhone came out, it was way too late.

Notably, BlackBerry's story is almost identical to that of Nokia in the post-iPhone era. Again, ask kids younger than 18, and they won't know what Nokia is.
More on the BlackBerry and Nokia failure in "Losing the Signal: The Untold Story Behind the Extraordinary Rise and Spectacular Fall of BlackBerry" by J. McNish and S. Silcoff.

Yahoo! was probably the first true Silicon Valley success story, the biggest story of the late 1990s. They ruled the Internet search industry. Destroyed by two students with an algorithm (Google). At least Kodak and Nokia lost to other big rivals. Yahoo! lost to literally to two kids. Looking back, it's hard to comprehend how did Yahoo! not see it coming, why they never bought Google, and why they could never develop a better algorithm and clean up their ad-cluttered website.
More on the Yahoo! failure in "Marissa Mayer and the Fight to Save Yahoo!" by N. Carls

Honorable spectacular failure mentions:
. Blockbuster
. The Encyclopedia Britannica
. MySpace

LESSON?
Most people would say, the lesson is that big and "old" companies are often so comfortable in their dominant position that they fail to spot new opportunities and adapt.

For me though, the LESSON is that it is really, REALLY hard to identify truly promising new opportunities. Even the biggest industry experts have a hard time telling which trends are junk and which ones are gold.

For every unappreciated genius there are a million of idiots who think they are geniuses.

Looking back, we all know Kodak should have gone digital and Yahoo! should have bought Google. But the truth is, thousands of new things are presented every day. It's nearly impossible to identify true gems in this noise at the time they are presented.

Try it yourself.

Should BMW invest billions in going electric? Or should they continue investing in hydrogen? Or self-driving? Or just keep building top-quality gasoline cars?

Should power companies bet everything on solar? Or wind? Or new-generation nuclear? Or nuclear? Or should they continue investing in cleaner fossil fuels?

Should Amazon spend billions on drone delivery? Or should it pump billions in Blue Origin (space exploration)?

How about Musk's Boring company? Or Hyperloop? The way of the future, or an expensive failure?

Should Apple spend billions on trying to build its own "Google Glass"? Or electric self-driving car? Or could the money be spent better elsewhere?

We will know for sure in 30 years, but the truth is, today nobody knows. Google, Facebook, Apple buy hundreds of startups, and 99% of them turn out to be a waste of money. It's easy to judge bad decision of the past. It's really, REALLY hard to predict the future.

My favorite book on this is "Everything Is Obvious. Once You Know the Answer" by D. Watts

Author: Vasyl Taras

Thursday, November 29, 2018

Standing up for yourself

Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for May 15, 2012 - GoComics



Moe: "Outta my way, Twinky."

Calvin: "A person can't be a doormat unless he allows himself to be one! I refuse to budge!"

Moe: *SHOVE*

Calvin: "Ack! Oof! Ugh!"

Calvin: "I've got to stop reading those dumb advice columns."

Monday, May 09, 2016

Singapore: A Third World F&B Market

Singapore a 'Third World' F&B market: Chen Fu Ji owner

"Bharati Jagdish: You said there was no customer service. I understand they would yell at their customers.

Koh: Yes, yes. Everyone would be scolded. I only know of one person who was not scolded. That was ex-president Ong Teng Cheong, because they grew up together in the same neighborhood.

The sisters had the understanding that they would be the ones to make decisions. Customers do not make decisions. So if you wanted them to cook dry bee hoon, if it's not on the menu, they have the right to reject you. But if they were in a happier mood, they would do it for you, and they would decide the price. And it could be S$80 for a portion serving three people...

Others will do minced pork tofu, or baby kailan, for example. If we were to do the same, we can only compete on prices. So every dish, we have to do differently. That means my chef has to think about how to be doing it differently. Instead of using oyster sauce, for instance, he has to do something else...

My objective has always been to protect this heritage. That's why I've never withheld the recipe. In fact, I make it very public.

Bharati: Aren't you afraid that someone will replicate it?

Koh: If you read the recipe correctly, it's so tedious that you wouldn’t want to do it yourself; you would come to my restaurant and eat...

If we compare Singapore F&B sector with Hong Kong's, ours is very much a Third World F&B market. You can only realise it when you go to Hong Kong. The F&B outlets there pay a lot higher rent than local outlets, yet can make more profit.

This is because the Hong Kong people, when they go to a restaurant, eat and go. They don't ask for anything else. So they go for the product, and that's why the turnover is very fast. I mean, three families sharing a table is very common, and you just eat and go, eat and go. The productivity per square foot is much higher than in Singapore, and it's all because of culture, I think.

In Singapore, some restaurants have started to give the customers a time limit. Within one hour, you must return the table, and a lot of customers are not prepared to accept that. Whereas in Hong Kong, you don't have to do that and usually the menu is very short. It's Set A, B, C, you order one, and it can be served quickly. You finish in 10 minutes, and you go. So the turnover is very fast, very high...

It is not necessary to be in the business of something you love. You need to be in the business of something that you can win. You have to look into the industry that you want to go into, and the kind of businesses and the competition.

It's better to be in a blue ocean than to be in a red ocean. Blue means less competition. I love innovation and creativity, but you should be cautious, because it's easy to fall in love with the things you want to do. Sometimes they don't make business sense. So you need to be very business-minded.

It’s called a business. It's not merely an interest. Sometimes interest and business are two separate things. My advice to budding entrepreneurs is do something where you can make money, rather than do something that you're only interested in, because there may not be a market and you’ll just go out of business"

Saturday, April 16, 2016

Observations - 16th April 2016

Is it worse to be wrong for the right reasons or right for the wrong reasons?

Even if I've given my privacy to Facebook, it doesn't mean the government can come and invade it; if I've had sex with 100 people it doesn't mean someone can come and rape me

Should utilitarians adopt babies instead of having their own?

Can you really love someone you never knew, even if it's a dead parent?

If it's a moral duty to donate most of your income to charity (per Singer) why not your labour (i.e. change your job, perhaps to one which earns more money so you can donate even more)?


""Everything in moderation"
She said as she downed the cyanide pill"

It's easy to follow your dreams if you have a well-to-do family and no kids or mortgage to pay for

"Choose a field you love and you'll never work a day in your life because that field probably isn't hiring"

Can the attitudes of making a difference to even one person being worth it, and not wasting time arguing on the Internet, be squared?


"As much as I love good sarcasm, using it on social media is like doing a sight gag on radio."

RT @patrickc: The increase in Microsoft's annual revenue since Google was founded is still greater than Google's total annual revenue.


Not sure why people at talk Q&As waste time por lumpah (thanking and praising the speaker(s)). Time is precious.

Che Guevera: Spent his whole life fighting against Capitalism. Now spends his death making t-shirt sellers rich.

"Sell them and you'll be sorry,
Buy them and you'll regret,
Hold them and you'll worry,
Do nothing and you'll fret."

Amused that the Germans defended their use of chlorine gas at Ypres by pointing out that the Hague declaration banned shells but they used cylinders

Wondering how many people who dismiss decade-old research they don't like speak approvingly about the Zimbardo and Milgram experiments

"A giraffe's coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat. Ever think about that? No. You only think about yourself."

"Jewish custom says a man dies twice – once when his body dies, and again when his name is no longer spoken" - Zen and the Art of Racing Motorcycles / Gregg Wright Bonelli


"The world of Star Trek is a world where resources are virtually unlimited. The truth is that almost any political system can work with unlimited resources. Look at Norway and United Arab Emirates. Politically very different, yet the stability, quality of lime, low crime and citizen happiness - those are at the same level in both countries (and some time ago I made an effort to compare those and make sure this is actually true).

If your political system has any kind of problem - unlimited resources will always compensate for it. Most people don't care about freedom and such, they want to eat and be comfortable and they will support anyone who gives them that."

Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Success and Failure

"People often assume they have succeeded, when in reality they have not failed yet."

"This comment reminds me of a documentary I watched last night titled Solo. *spoiler alert* A man tried to kayak from Tasmania to New Zealand, made it like 90% of the way there, he could see dry land in the distance (NZ), thought he was good to go, then his kayak capsized and he drowned about 30km from the coast. What a shame."

Monday, August 24, 2015

The Mexican Fisherman, Revisited

A happy fisherman lives a simple life on a small island. The fellow goes fishing for a few hours every day. He catches a few fish, sells them to his friends, and enjoys spending the rest of the day with his wife and children, and napping. He couldn’t imagine changing a thing in his relaxed and easy life.

A recent M.B.A. visits this island and quickly sees how this fisherman could become rich. He could catch more fish, start up a business, market the fish, open a cannery, maybe even issue an I.P.O. Ultimately he would become truly successful. He could donate some of his fish to hungry children worldwide and might even save lives.

“And then what?” asks the fisherman.

“Then you could spend lots of time with your family,” replies the visitor. “Yet you would have made a difference in the world. You would have used your talents, and fed some poor children, instead of just lying around all day.”

(via How to Live Wisely - The New York Times)


(Obviously, this puts one in mind of the The Story of the Mexican Fisherman)

Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Not having the patience for others

A popular quote from José Micard Teixeira that is attributed to Meryl Streep:

I no longer have patience for certain things, not because I’ve become arrogant, but simply because I reached a point in my life where I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me. I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature. I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me. I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise. I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance. I do not adjust either to popular gossiping. I hate conflict and comparisons. I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities. In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal. I do not get along with those who do not know how to give a compliment or a word of encouragement. Exaggerations bore me and I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals. And on top of everything I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.

This is a very interesting quote.

Let's unpack it.

I do not want to waste more time with what displeases me or hurts me
I want to be comfortable. I don't want to learn any more. I don't want to challenge myself.

I have no patience for cynicism, excessive criticism and demands of any nature
I like mindless positive speak. I do not wish to have myself, my ideas or my projects critically examined.

I lost the will to please those who do not like me, to love those who do not love me and to smile at those who do not want to smile at me.
I no longer follow the Golden Rule. My love and niceness is no longer unconditional, but now cynically (SPOING!) premised upon reciprocation.

I no longer spend a single minute on those who lie or want to manipulate. I decided not to coexist anymore with pretense, hypocrisy, dishonesty and cheap praise.
I no longer can function in society with its polite, white lies and social lubrication. Even though I am condemning everyone I am almost certainly not as perfect as I expect others to be and am thus guilty of the very same sins I deplore in others.

I do not tolerate selective erudition nor academic arrogance.
I dismiss what I am unwilling and/or unable to understand and am happy to wallow in my ignorance.

I hate conflict and comparisons.
Despite condemning a lot of people and comparing them to some Platonic ideal of what a proper person should be, I pretend that I hate "conflict" and "comparisons".

I believe in a world of opposites and that’s why I avoid people with rigid and inflexible personalities.
I have a Manichean, rigid view of the world without subtlety and yet declaim "rigid and inflexible" people.

In friendship I dislike the lack of loyalty and betrayal.
I expect my friends to agree with me all the time. If they have their own mind, they are scum.

Exaggerations bore me
I don't realise the irony of claiming exaggerations bore me when my whole spiel is one big exaggeration.

I have difficulty accepting those who do not like animals.
I supposedly love animals (though I probably eat them anyway) but hate humans.

I have no patience for anyone who does not deserve my patience.
I am insufferably self-entitled, sanctimonious and judgmental, and go around condemning people I don't like as unworthy of me.

Tuesday, June 09, 2015

Change the System


"Don't like ISIS?
Join them and change the system from within"

Thursday, December 18, 2014

I'm allergic to Chicken Soup

I've just had a look at the latest List of Chicken Soup for the Soul books.

Not unexpectedly, this series of self-indulgent emotional masturbation in a vacuum has managed to surpass its previous "achievement" of "Chicken Soup for the Golfer's Soul".

Some of the more egregious entries:

Chicken Soup for the African American Woman's Soul (naturally, there's also Chicken Soup for the African American Soul)
Chicken Soup for the American Idol Soul
Chicken Soup for the Baseball Fan's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Beach Lover's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Coffee Lover's Soul (presumably this includes stories of brews gone wrong)
Chicken Soup for the Chiropractic Soul (maybe this comforts those who have their backs broken)
Chicken Soup for the Dental Soul (this makes sense: after a root canal the only thing you can eat is Chicken Soup)
Chicken Soup for the Entrepreneur's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Fisherman's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Gardener's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Golfer's Soul – The 2nd Round (yes, there're two!)
Chicken Soup for the Indian Teenage Soul
Chicken Soup for the Latter-day Saint Soul
Chicken Soup for the NASCAR Soul
Chicken Soup for the Nature Lover's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Ocean Lover's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Scrapbooker's Soul ("Mom threw out my scrapbook. I'm very sad.")
Chicken Soup for the Shopper's Soul ("I missed Black Monday. Now I feel like killing myself")
Chicken Soup for the Tea-Lover's Soul
Chicken Soup for the Writer's Soul

Monday, November 10, 2014

"You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step"


"Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step" - Martin Luther King, Jr.
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