When you can't live without bananas

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Wednesday, February 16, 2022

Links - 16th February 2022 (1 - Women)

Meme - "SLOW INTERNET AGAIN
EITHER MY SON IS DOWNLOADING PORN
OR MY DAUGHTER IS UPLOADING IT"

Meme - "Goddess: I can cum 8 times & not get tired. Men cum 2-3 times & they gotta reboot like 1995 Windows computer.
gi: Y'all need 9 months to push out a baby, I need only 9 seconds."

Meme - "When I’m bored I message the hookers on backpage and see if I can get them to do manual labor
Hey what are your prices?
100 half hour 150 hour
And you’ll do anything I want?
Yes papi
Ok good I have a really long fence that needs to be painted. Shouldn’t take you more than 30 min I have cash
Like an actual fence?"
Keywords: clean my, anything you want, my house

Meme - "WELL I DID IT I FOUND OUT THE BEST PLACE 2 GET PUSSY ITS A PROTESTE! I WAS OUT SHOUTING FUCK TRUMP FOR LESS THAN 2 HOURS B4 I ENDED UP IN A SHITTY HIPSTER STUDIO APARTMENT WITH SOME GIRL WITH A SKRILLEX HAIRCUT *emoji* THATS LESS TIME THAN IT TAKES AT THA CLUB. SHE WAS ALL LIKE WAT DO U THINK ABOUT WOMENS RIGHTS AN I WAS LIKE WELL THEY BETTER THAN WOMENS WRONGS AN SHE LAUGHED AN THEN WE HAD ANAL"

Meme - "Letting your male bestie practice his strokes on you so he doesn't disappoint his gf>>>>>>>>"

Meme - "The Experiences of Men and Women on Tinder
Women match with 36% of those they like while men match with less than 2%"
And this despite being a lot more selective

Meme - "I think I'm pregnant. I told you not to nut in me. We should have used a condom" "Smh. Let me tell you some real shit. Out of all the women I've dealt with you are the most kindhearted and smartest one. You have your shit together like no other. Now normally I would pull out, but something heavy on my heart said not to. I see something in you that you probably don't see in yourself. I know that you will make a great single mother!! And that's why did what I did. You got this!! Prayers to you and your family."

Meme - ""I found out my boyfriend was cheating. We went to a party, I blew a random guy in the bathroom and kept the c*m in my mouth. Then I kissed my boyfriend and broke up with him." - Ocean City High School"

Meme - "When you see girls like this on instagram
remember who owns the boat
fat old rich men"

LÖNËR on Twitter - "I dated a blind girl who later dumped me, guess who's back with a different voice"

Meme - World paintings: William-Adolphe Bouguereau
LalAtu Jee: "I love you 9006090653"
Deepak Bairwa: "Hello sexy dear friend how are you"
Saheb Malakar Malakar: "I kiss your full body"
Molah Arman: "Beautiful girl friend how are you? I like you ilove you i fill you and all day all night everyday everything u? need you please com bangladesh receive you"
This is "After The Bath"

Guy in doghouse : AreTheStraightsOK - "[A photograph of a cork board. Posted to the board is a white piece of paper with black handwriting.]
Dear potential hot woman:
You left this in the machine earlier - I only know this because when I brought my laundry up, my wife found them and completely flipped her shit. Unfortunately, unlike you, she's a whale and knew they weren't hers. The sex I get once a year is now gone [frowning face] - I hope you come back to get what turned my wife into a she-Devil.
- guy in doghouse
[Underneath the paper is a pair of black lace panties hung from two push pins.]"

Meme - "When someone accuses you of being sexist but instead of arguing with them, you hop in your Chariot and ride away"

NicholasG on Twitter - "Asked my daughter what she wanted for lunch and she said “tacos” so we found a taco truck but she couldn’t decide what to order because “all they have is tacos” so the answer is 9, that is the age ladies become impossible to please."

Meme - "Super Models *Ugly*
Random cashier girl at HEB *Pretty*"

Meme - MissHenley: "You deleted it, but you can't pretend that wasn't tweeted @Vertagear. You owe the women in the industry a major apology."
Vertagear: "Is this accurate.
Male: *Game on big screen, player on small screen*.
Female: *Game on small screen, player on big screen*"
"MissHenley was live - playing Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War. All Social Media & OnlyFans: *link*. Facebook challenged my community and I to hit a Star Goal this month - Bikini Pool Stream to celebrate with everyone when we hit it!"

Answer to What's the dirtiest thing you have ever done? - Quora - "the grossest thing I've ever done is bleed on my molester's hand. And I do not regret it"

One Woman's Struggle to Reuse Her Penis Cake Pan... : funny

aathioli on Twitter - "You know Apple is run by men… When they call it an iPhone 6+ and it’s only 5.5 inches."
"Of course it’s run by men. It’s a TRILLION dollar company, not a kitchen 🤣😂😇"
Tellingly she claimed he was offended

Meme - "Father's Day is such a joke. Can we just cancel this day? Or make it a second Mother's Day? Last time I checked my mom did both roles"
"and last I checked my dad did both roles, so shut the fuck up and sit down"
"He obviously failed if you talking to a girl like that pussy"
Good luck to anyone trying to cancel Mother's Day

Meme - "Women: *punches, beats, stabs, sets you on fire*
Men: *Blocks a hit*
Women: "HELP!!! THIS MANS CRAZY""

Meme - ""Me as boyfriend"
"If you can't handle a bad bitch don't date one"
"If you are a bad bitch don't look for a good man.""

RabidWookie on Twitter - "I wear a ring now and the amt of men checking me out or talking to me reduced by 80% My guy wears a ring and the amt of women checking him out or talking to him doubled wtf is wrong with you women?"
"I knew a single guy in college that wore a fake wedding ring because it helped him get attention from women, he slept with dozens of women that thought he was cheating on his wife with them. When he told them he was single afterwards they were all outraged."

Sabria G. Williams, MSW, RCSWI on Twitter - "Soo my boyfriend is mad at me because I went through his phone while he was sleep (btw I didn’t find anything)but instead of arguing with me he buys me Chipotle, snacks, and card that says
“I’m sorry for not making you feel safe and secure but there’s nobody else but you”🥺🤧"
Can women respect a man who doesn't respect himself?

Facebook - "My cousin been in jail for five years and he finally got to meet his two month year old today and they caught this beautiful moment on camera 🥺❤️
AMOSC princesskirby 👻"

Khloe Kardashian rushes to wipe unedited photo of herself from the internet - "an unedited, natural-looking photograph of Khloe Kardashian started circulating online after it was published by a member of her team. Since then, the TV star and media personality’s representatives have been making efforts to urge various Instagram accounts to remove copies of the photo. According to a report by Page Six, many handles which reposted the image and praised it as “beautiful” have now received “legal threats” calling for its removal, as the photograph was apparently not approved by Kardashian... Earlier this year, the Keeping Up With The Kardashians star posted a photograph of her stretch marks with the caption “I love my stripes” in a bid to promote body positivity."

Kardashian team working hard to remove unwanted Khloé photo - "The image shows the reality star’s face and body, as she appears in a bikini by a pool, without the heavy editing and airbrushing that are mainstays of photos Kardashian normally puts on Instagram. The shot — which Page Six has confirmed is authentic — soon spread around the internet."

What I learned about male desire in a sex doll factory - "Sometimes, she said, customers request bespoke faces based on the countenance of a deceased spouse. She promptly waved me on, but I paused in place, gazing at the heads. Grieving widowers was not something I expected to find here. Maybe I should have known better... On the popular online message board Doll Forum, one man writes that, for him, sex dolls tap into his longing for being with “a woman who loves me for me”. Another message board member riffs on the simple companionship they serve: “A doll to sit in an empty chair so you have someone to sit and chat with. A doll to hug and kiss. A doll to share an empty bed with. A doll to love and be loved [by].” I’ve heard similar refrains reporting on another realm of fantasy: porn. Once, while visiting a virtual reality shoot, the director told me that what straight men most want from these immersive point-of-view scenes is cuddling and extended eye contact. They want connection... In 2016, a study published in the Journal of Sex Research surveyed straight men in long-term heterosexual relationships about what elicited their desire, and found that key factors included “feeling desired” and “intimate communication”. The experience of rejection and a “lack of emotional connection” notably decreased their interest in sexual intimacy. The researchers concluded that “men’s sexual desire may be more complex and relational” than previously thought... sex dolls allow owners to not only play with femininity but also defy that early childhood directive, “dolls are for girls”... many straight men fantasize about women who seem “to exist primarily to sexually service men and derive tremendous pleasure themselves from the effort to do so”. Bader argues that these fantasies arouse men not because they facilitate misogyny but because they allow men to counter pervasive beliefs, “for example, that women don’t enjoy sex, don’t enjoy pleasing men, and easily feel disappointed or hurt by men pursuing their own interests”... Sometimes, Bader writes, men who have developed a sense of guilt toward women, “solve” this dilemma through objectifying women and divorcing sex from intimacy... RealDoll’s very emphasis on customization belies the concept of a singular, universally agreed-upon ideal... The potential for being made a fool is a recurrent theme in well-considered writing on straight men’s sexuality. The researcher Brené Brown maintains that men learn early on that they are responsible for initiating sex and that “sexual rejection soon becomes the hallmark of masculine shame”. One of the therapists she quotes in her book, Daring Greatly, asserts, “I guess the secret is that sex is terrifying for most men.”... McMullen, the same man I’d watched decades ago talking about building to the specification of men’s fantasies, gazed down at a computer-generated woman on his iPad. “She’ll ask you questions,” he said. “She’ll remember your hopes and dreams.” This was RealDoll’s artificial intelligence app, which allows users to engage in basic conversation with the digitized and fully customizable woman on-screen. Soon, the same app would allow customers to interact with Harmony, which is essentially one of their old-fashioned dolls outfitted with a moving mouth. McMullen explained that the AI, whether used as a standalone app or with the robot, works like a Tamagotchi, that egg-shaped virtual pet from the 1990s. If you fail to interact with it, the program’s “social meter” declines. Similarly, a “love meter” rises if you give the AI compliments and express emotions – say, mentioning that you enjoy spending time with “her”. This design choice is a moral one, McMullen explained. He wants to teach people to be better humans"

Meme - "Got boobs?"
"Hi. I do"
"Nice, what size?"
"B cup"
"Cool"
"Yeah"
"You happy with 'em?"
"Not really"
"How come?"
"I'm a guy"
*Stranger has disconnected.*

Meme - "When ur dying but hoe is life"

Meme - "Nice, but really wish she would get out of the way."

Meme - "Got some pictures of the olld ladie looking hot on the beater box"
"Which one is the beater box?"

Meme - "My tiny italian landlord strikes again"
"There's an attractive man here to see you"
"Haha that's John! You can send him back down stairs."
"Is John going to be a regular guest?"
"Well... John's a good friend. but he's gay if that's what you're asking me"
"You could get a straight guy here if you learned a good pasta. This Sunday, come upstairs, I'll show you how to make a Rissotto that will get you married and out of my basement."

Meme - "Romeo Beckham, 17, is the spitting image of his footballer father in shirtless holiday snap"
"I thought it was Victoria Beckham with her tits out"

Meme - "You find women in their early or mid twenties attractive?
What are you sir, some sort of pedophile?"

Meme - "Guys really live in apartments like this and don't see any issue"
"Decorations:
cost money
require thought (Do I like this?)
take up space
make holes in the wall
require decisions (Where does it go?)
serve no practical purpose
increase in 100-fold when you're moving to a new place
What kind of decorations do you put up and why? I know this is my place. Most of the time my eyes are glued to a screen, book, skillet, or cutting board. What am I supposed to do? Look up and be like "Oh right! I managed to live today, but I totally forgot about laughing and loving!"?"

Meme - "You ever think about us getting back together?"
"Na. I don't want a chick who's been married before or has kids."
"I was married to you and their your kids asshole."
"See 2 much bs."

Meme - "You're 19 years old. Stop trynna be a wife and go be a hoe"
"I'm 21 & Needed To See This. Thank"
"Listening to Dumb Advice like this is how Women end up pregnant by the wrong dude, struggling financially, or catching an STD. Even if they said wear protection that doesn't always save someone."
"Then by 30 they gone be trying to find a "good man""

La Diablesse on Twitter - "Stop policing what a CHILD should wear in their own home.
'there are men in the house' What kind of men exactly? If they are aroused by children then they shouldn't be in the house period."
This is a great excuse for anyone under the age of consent to be nude in public

Russian Nurse Gets Suspended For Wearing Just Her Lingerie Under See-Through PPE Kit

Meme - "Unique corn particles strongly stimulate pleasure hot spots"
Andrei Mikhailov: "Women talking about impossible beauty standards set by society and we gotta compete with 10" corn dicks. Smh."

Meme - "Doing what they do best? Digging up someone's past"

Model told to cover up sports bra as her 'big boobs make people uncomfortable' - "Whitney Paige Venable, from Florida, US, wore an athleisure outfit to the theme park in Orlando and said she saw other women wearing similar outfits as her."
Clearly, no shoes, no shirt, no service only applies to men. If you try to apply it to women you are sexist. Men who walk around in their underwear are disgusting perverts and if you support them you're sexist. Women who walk around in their underwear are independent and empowered and if you oppose them you're sexist

Brazilian Model Who Married Herself Will Get 'Divorced', Says Met Someone Special - "Cris Galera, who hails from Sao Paulo in Brazil, recently in an interview revealed that she is falling in love again after “meeting someone special". A Brazilian model, after getting tired of relying on others, had ‘married herself’ in September 2021. Months later, she is all set to divorce herself as she has finally met someone special... Cris was not the first one to marry herself. Back in 2018, a 40-year-old Italian woman married herself as she got tired of waiting for her ‘Mr Right’. Reportedly, Laura Mesi had made a pact with herself that if she was not able to meet “the one” by the time she turns 40, she would marry herself. A woman from Sydney did something similar as she called off her engagement and went on to marry herself."

Meme - ""We call it... female empowerment... and they will dance naked for the price of a cheeseburger"
"$50 / 10 SUBS - NAME ON BODY
$100 / 20 SUBS - SQUATS
$250 / 50 SUBS - FOLLOW BACK ON IG OR TWITTER
200 SUBS - NAME ON FOREHEAD
Enjoy your boob break. It comes free with the low price of civilizational freefall."

Study: Up to 60 percent of women fantasize about ‘being dominated’ - The Washington Post - "Depending on the decade, some sexual fantasies have been considered unusual by psychiatrists. Among those listed in the fifth edition of “The Diagnostic and Statisical Manual of Mental Disorders:” masochism, exhibitionism, transvestism and pedophilia. But how rare are fantasies considered unusual — or otherwise stigmatized?...
The top-ranked fantasy was “I like to feel romantic emotions during a sexual relationship.” Among women surveyed, 92.2 percent shared this fantasy; among men, 88.3 percent. On the low end of the spectrum, fewer than 1 percent of women had fantasized about having sex with a child under 12 years old; among men, 1.8 percent had...
61.2 percent of men had fantasized about interracial sex; just 27.5 percent of women had
57.0 percent of men had fantasized about having sex with someone much younger; just 18.1 percent of women had
56.5 of women surveyed had fantasized about having sex with more than three people, both men and women; just 15.8 percent of men had
64.6 percent of women had fantasized about “being dominated sexually”; 53.3 percent of men had...
“Among women, it was found that SF of being dominated, being spanked or whipped, being tied up, and being forced to have sex were reported by 30%-60%,” according to the study. ” … The fantasy of being dominated was significantly greater for women than for men, on average, whereas the fantasy of dominating was statistically stronger for men than for women, on average.”"

Meme - "Men deserve happiness too"
Replies: "another case of pickmetis"
"during women's month? Really?
"No but nice try"
"No"
"I think you forgot how to spell women"
"Search: how to delete a tweet"
"I mean yes, but mostly no"
"E-H-H-H i think not"
"No, no they absolutely do not"
"No they fucking don't"
"do they??"
"source?"
"They absolutely do not."
"Not when all they put out into the world is misery & disrespect"
"Are you being forced to post this? (Red heart) for yes (pink heart) for no"
"this is the only time "not all men" can be applied with a valid reason"
"nah"
"Delete this bestie"
"no they don't"
"i don't know bout this one"
"Nahhh"
Misandry is sexy

Why I Will Not Buy A Chanel Bag For The Mrs - "I was recently told that owning a Chanel bag is not too different from the 100k saving challenge. Apparently, people will ask you at what age you achieved those milestones... The Bag Owns You, Not The Other Way Round... These Chanel bags rarely see the light of the day. The worry that they might get damaged means many just take it out once a while from their cupboards to pose, take selfies and ahem, upload them on social media. My assertion is that if you cannot afford to be largely stoical if you were to damage the product, you cannot “afford” it. And maybe you are just better off admiring the product in the shop instead of purchasing it."

Nipple/Breast stimulation and sexual arousal in young men and women - "The major findings in regard to the women were that 81.5% reported that stimulation of their nipples/breasts caused or enhanced their sexual arousal, 78.2% agreed that when sexually aroused such manipulation increased their arousal, 59.1% had asked to have their nipples stimulated during lovemaking, and only 7.2% found that the manipulation decreased their arousal. In regard to the men, 51.7% reported that nipple stimulation caused or enhanced their sexual arousal, 39% agreed that when sexually aroused such manipulation increased their arousal, only 17.1% had asked to have their nipples stimulated, and only 7.5% found that such stimulation decreased their arousal."

Meme - "Ruled for Dating MY SON
He is not your ATM.
UNDERSTAND I don't like you and I never will
I'M EVERYWHERE.
You hurt him, I hurt you
Respect me as his Mama.
DON'T LIE TO HIM,OR TO ME.
He is my PRINCE, Not your toy.
I DON'T MIND GOING BACK TO JAIL.
Understand I can make you GO AWAY.
WHATEVER YOU DO TO HIM, I WILL DO TO YOU"

Meme - Bitch @morgnla: ""OnLyfAns iSnT a ReAL jOb" ok so why have i just bought my first flat at 19????"
josh @jOshGi7: "over 100 years of feminism and you still have to resort to being an online prostitute to be successful"

Meme - "When someone out of your league starts flirting with you *Gollum*"

Meme - "Date a girl who wear glasses. It's like dating 2 girls when she takes them off."
Xavier: "Wash off her Makeup and then you date 3 girls"
You are here: "Remove her #Instagram filter and you get to date 4 girls."

Meme - "You can now buy algorithmically created nudes of non-existent women. Is this ok?"
"OnlyFans Girls Union #69: They took our jobs!"

BBC Wales guest goes viral after leaving explicit item in background of news interview - "BBC Wales viewers were left in hysterics after a guest left a rather unfortunate item in the background of her interview. Yvette Amos appeared on news programme BBC Wales Today on Tuesday (26 January) evening to discuss her experiences of unemployment during the pandemic. However, those watching at home found their eyes being drawn to the shelf behind Amos, which as well as holding books and board games contained a large pink penis. The image was shared on Twitter by journalist Grant Tucker, who tweeted: “Perhaps the greatest guest background on the BBC Wales news tonight. Always check your shelves before going on air.”... The clip also divided the internet on the important issue of whether the item was actually a sex toy or a novelty sculpture."

Uber driver catches her ‘man’ with another woman after unknowingly picking them up for a ride: ‘I would never recover’ - "“When you decide to stay in on a Friday, drive for Uber and your man gets in the backseat with another girl,” the clip’s caption read."

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