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Interesting information on Romantic Relationships:
Standards for relationships
- ♀ have higher expectations
- Younger ♀ expect more intimacy than ♂ or older ♀ do
- Younger married ♀ more lonely than married ♂
- ♂ & ♀ have same expectations
- ♂’s expectations more likely to be fulfilled
- ♂ & ♀
- Honesty
- affection
- kindness
- companionship
- Physical attractiveness
- Intelligence
- occupational status
- socioeconomic status
- ambition
- Have prestigious career
- Have high-paying job
- Be athletic
- Do chores outside the house
- Be physically attractive
- Do chores inside the house
- More common for ♂ to ask ♀ out on date
- ♂ use direct strategies to initiate; e.g. asking
- ♀ use indirect strategies; e.g. hinting
- Conceptualize ♂ role as proactive: ask for date, decide what to do, driving, kissing
- Conceptualize ♀ role as reactive: getting ready, worrying, waiting, accepting/rejecting advances
- ♀ define as self-disclosure
- ♂ define as physical proximity/sex
Love Styles
- score higher on storge and pragma
- friendship based on interests: Love may take time to develop. Desire a long term relationship based on mutual trust, making a home and raising a family together.
- shopping for a suitable mate: Wants relationship to work well, partners are compatible and satisfy each other’s basic or practical needs. Relationships based on satisfactory rewards rather than romantic attraction.
- game for mutual enjoyment: Love as series of challenges and puzzles to be solved. Date several partners, move in and out of love affairs quickly and easily. Refuse to make long-range plans, wary of emotional intensity from others
- Motives for sex
- ♂ have recreational attitude
- Pleasure, tension release is goal
- Relationship not required
- ♀ have relational attitude
- Sex conveys intimacy, love
- Relationship integral
- Older respondents don’t show sex differences
- Wives display more openness, networks & shared tasks
- Best predictor of couple’s commitment is wife assurance
- Wives accommodate to husband’s preferences
- People who score high in expressivity and/or femininity put more effort into relationship
Marital satisfaction
- Gender roles
- Traditional gender roles -> lowest satisfaction
- Androgynous -> highest satisfaction, longest relationship
- Power differential
- Egalitarian most satisfied because of equity
- Husband-dominant next most satisfied
- Wife-dominant least satisfied
- Temperament
- Types
- Positive temperament = affectionate, excited
- Negative temperament = nasty, enraged
- Men’s marital satisfaction tied to own temperament
- Women’s tied to own + husband’s temperament
- Women’s tied to own + husband’s temperament
- Husband’s emotions affect wife’s emotions (but not vice versa)
- Men
- Avoid/distract; avoid escalation
- Coercion, aggression, control tactics
- Negativity bias: Interpret lack of loving behavior as hostility
- Negativity
- Positivity bias: Interpret lack of hostility as love
- Wife demands (nags)
- Husband withdraws
- Relationship development
- Gays emphasize physical characteristics
- Lesbians emphasize personality characteristics
- Out of friendship most common
- Gays place greater emphasis on sexuality
- Lesbians place greater emphasis on intimacy
- Lesbian have greater intimacy then heterosexual couples
- Gays versus heterosexual men
- Less faithfulness
- More partners
- Equal frequency of sex
- Selection bias
- Less traditional views of marriage
- Women more career oriented & financially independent
- Men less financially successful
- Poorer communication skills
- Less satisfaction w/ relationship
- Higher rates of domestic & child abuse
- Lower marriage quality
- Division of labor
- Broadened view of family
