(from an email)

Subject: NeWater to be renamed "Jamban Juice"

Aware that many Singaporeans were wary of Newater, the treated used water to be introduced as an alternative water source for the country, the Environment Ministry recently held a contest to find an attractive name under which to market it.
The winning name, "Jamban Juice", was announced yesterday at a press conference and prize-giving ceremony at the pilot Newater plant in Bedok. Newater will be marketed under this name when it is introduced into the water supply.
"This is so unexpected", said Ms Lim Sai Chui, 20, who came up with the winning name. "I'm so happy."
Ms Lim is a recent graduate of one of the many creativity training courses being offered in Singapore.
"I didn't think I would have an opportunity to use my newly-learned skills in creativity so soon", said Ms Lim. "But when I heard about this contest, I knew I had to enter. Got chance to win money, of course must try try ah."
"Also, it's for the good of Singapore, what", she added belatedly.
Also present and receiving prizes at yesterday's event were the second- and third-place winners of the contest. Coming in as runner- up was Mr Minum bin Ayer Longkang, 23, with his entry, "Canal Cascade".
Said Mr Minum of his entry, "I realised that Newater wasn't being reclaimed entirely from sewage, but also from drains and other water runoffs. So I decided to go for a name based on this less-obvious used-water source instead. I think the judges may have been impressed by the originality of my approach and the resulting name I came up with."
Third place went to "Flush Fresh", by Mr Lim Pung Jio, 18, who happens to be the younger brother of the first-place winner. When asked about the curious phenomenon of the top three winning entries all using alliteration, the contestants all said that the similarity was no coincidence.
"I learned this in my creativity course", said winner Ms Lim. "It was one of the exercises we did one day, making up alliterative phrases. I never thought it would actually come in useful."
"Me too", said runner-up Mr Minum. "I took a creativity course too, and learned how to be creative in the same way. This just shows how useful these courses are. Isn't it?"
"I never take a creative course, but my sister teach me about allegation, so I use lah", explained Mr Lim the third-place finisher.

In a prepared statement, the Environment Ministry said that the Government expected the new marketing name to smooth the path to acceptance of Newater, as Singaporeans already had several nicknames for plain water, including "Sky Juice" and "Tapsi Cola".
However, the Ministry was taking no chances, and had already commissioned local musician Dick Wee to compose a jingle for use in a future promotional campaign for Jamban Juice. The jingle, set to the tune of popular local song "Chan Mali Chan", is not yet finished, but Mr Wee said that the lyrics to the chorus had already been written. They go:

Drink Jamban Juice (Yam Seng!)
Drink Jamban Juice (Yam Seng!)
Drink Jamban Juice,
It's the water we all choose.

In addition to her first-place prize, Ms Lim is expected to be given a cameo role in the video of the jingle.


Bottles of Newater are being included in the goodie bags of spectators at the National Day Parade. However, they will be labeled simply as "Newater". As such, the bottles will be NDP 2002 collectors items, and Singaporeans are encouraged to keep, treasure, and display them as they would Hello Kitty dolls.
The "Drink Jamban Juice" campaign kicks off on Saturday, the day after National Day. On this day, the Jamban Juice brand will be launched, and all future bottles of Newater will be labeled with this new name.
As with previous national campaigns, all local media will be saturated with exhortations for public compliance with the expected behavior, with the jingle being played everywhere ad nauseum at all hours of the day.
Jamban Juice will be sold at all NTUC FairPrice outlets and HDB minimarts, as well as other supermarkets, and is expected to be available as early as next week. Yam Seng!