"From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it." - Groucho Marx

***

Someone: after looking at the gals from SDU magazine, i think the pple around me arent bad after all...=P whoops

wa lao....if u see e SDU ones.....for me i rather be a monk

Me: consider that the magazine ones are probably the better ones

Someone: they will send u a free membership soon

stay tuned
around march


Someone else: my school does not allow ex-students with long and coloured hair to come to school to visit teachers
because the current students "might form the wrong perception that the school actually endorses such grooming."


Someone on HWMNBN: he'd fuck a pencil if it wore a skirt

HWMNBN: Only if it was a chio pencil. None of those HB sluts.


Someone else: i have rape fantasies
which is apparently quite typical

Me: rape fantasies
or fantasies of submission
not nec the same

Someone else: rape fantasies (:

Me: so who do you want to rape you

Someone else: not you (:


jb: when guys a little less than twice your age want to meet you alone, it doesn't mean anything good

i used to think it was just being friendly
but it really isn't


Someone: *wants to be an ancient chinese taoist for the wrong reasons.*

"In early Chinese Culture, sex was regarded without guilt. Like Princess Shan Yin, the Taoists were great believers in sheer quantity: "The more women with whom a man has intercourse" wrong one early Taoist sage "The greater will be the benefit" Another advised "If in one night he can have intercourse wiht more than 10 woman is best" - Christopher Hart in Ancient Sex Manuals, reading for SC 3219

Everyone was fucking like bunnies then.

Me: Eh. You think so easy ah. Last time no contraception. And they didn't know about STDs. But yah pre-Ming Chinese were kinky

Anyway more importantly the Taoists believed that you could not COME. If you came too much you'd die. So you should either withdraw before coming or you practice finger presses/breathing control to prevent your come from shooting out (actually it went into the bladder, but the Ancient Chinese didn't know that)

Someone: Wrong la, they believe that you could come, the only thing is that, they believe that men have limited amount of yang qi, therefore they shouldnt come too often. Will finish up the good stuff.

They tried to simulate multiple orgasms for men by withholding ejeculation. Apparently, recent science has shown the ejeculation and orgasm are two separate events.

Anyway STD sounds like moral panic to me leh.

Me: SAME LAH. That's like saying you can shoot someone, just that you'll go to jail.

There're tantric techniques that involved exercising your PC muscles and breath exercises. You go and try. I'm too lazy to try.

Eh VD quite big last time you know

Someone: Different leh, if they dont shoot then they die.
Not having sex will severely impair your yang qi!

Eh I want to go learn.
Gab, we go learn together la,
set up class make some money.
Can make it a CCA in NUS,
get SDU sponsor

Me: If they don't shoot they die?!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Someone: ya lor, they repress yang qi.
Maybe internal combustion.

Someone else: haha...SDU won't sponsor a no-shooting class la!


HWMNBN: he's been poisoning my well

i can't abide treachery in my male friends
so i've decided to keep away

Me: so you can abide treachery in your female friends?

HWMNBN: i expect treachery from my female friends
it's inehrent to their nature

males are a different story

Me: ...


TMM: I hope SUG doesn't stand for Single Ugly Girl


MFTTW: i still think the customs inspector who took my bak kwa ate it
and pocketed the $170 fine

"fine is $350 by credit card... $170 by cash"
YEAH RIGHT

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHA
like malaysia like that

MFTTW: yup

i should have told him "yeah i know what's going on.. i'v been ot malaysia"
he was desi

prob ABCD
american-born confused desi

the epithet of choice of the indian-born desis

i've noticed that overseas indians are disproportionately represented in customs/immigration

i think it's a power trip thing
to compensate for them failing to get into medical/law/business school

Me: ><

MFTTW: SERIOUS

the indians here are either all doctors/lawyers/business
or they are border police


MFTTW on this exchange: your fb spouse is damn cheong hei [cantonese... "long winded" (literally)]
need so many words to explain simple concepts

i summarize for you

1) sg gahmen acts as Big Brother
2) Languages are hard to learn

ok chop chop done.

oh ya, unless he's Malay he shouldn't use "brudder" :P