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Friday, June 27, 2008

"Never believe anything until it has been officially denied." - Claud Cockburn

***

Given differing desires about the order of my travelogues, I have come up with the horribly creative solution of doing both at once. Due to the lack of satiation effects, it will probably take slightly shorter than if I'd done both sequentially.

Despite my Japan trip only being 1-2 days longer, I scribbled twice as much stuff. Tells you something about the Japs, the Baltics or both.


Japan trip
Day 1 - 6th June - Aobadai, Tokyo


To save on cab fare, I went to Changi the night before. However I was unable to sleep (probably some combination of anxiety about missing my flight, uncomfortable airport chairs and annoying music - though none of that has stopped me in the past) and so observed a couple of things.

There was an Indian couple at Imperial Treasure La Mian and the man was annoyed at the PRC waitress being unable to communicate with him: 'This is Singapore. Nobody speaks English anymore!' He should try looking Chinese - it's even worse. I swear, one day I'm going to pretend I can't speak Mandarin and see what happens, to simulate the plight of non-Mandarin-speaking Thai Chinese/Koreans/Japanese in Singapore.

Later I saw 2 toilet cleaners, one PRC and one Indian. When the PRC spoke to the Indian she used English, but it was so heavily accented it sounded like Mandarin.

NWA (Northwest) had self-service checkin, but it was really silly because they had people to operate the machines for us.

The differing classification of Men's magazines in the airport was interesting. FHM and Maxim Singapore were untouched, but FHM UK, Arena UK and Ralph Australia were labelled "Unsuitable for the young" and sealed. I know that FHM UK has pictures of topless women, but I am extremely skeptical that that is allowed in Singapore. Maybe they mosaic-censor the nipples Jap-style or something, or paste the stickers that adult shops use to cover naughty parts (bah). I would've found out personally, but $13 for Ralph or $18 for FHM UK is too much without a research grant. Oddly enough, the women's mags weren't marked "Unsuitable for the young" also. Hah.

To kill time I snipped my split ends with nail clippers. Very fun.

Pilot to Japan: "Your last piece of useless trivia to impress friends and family back home with: *our speed and altitutde*"

I agreed to switch seats to let a family sit together, and at the end of the flight I was given 2 amenities vouchers. Air miles are a waste of time, and I didn't need a beer/wine/cocktail or snack on the plane (does this mean alcohol or snacks are not normally served to you in Cattle Class?) so I saved them for airport dining.

My flight was actually transiting in Narita on the way to Minneapolis, which apparently is a big air hub, so very few of us exited immigration. So few, in fact, that we did not get our own luggage belt - our luggage was unceremoniously dumped at one side.

Customs was extremely strict, and seemed to check most people's luggage. They claimed it was because of security, but I know they were actually checking for people trying to sneak in sacks of rice.

Sign in the Narita airport lift: "Do not jump in the elevator". Wth.


There was a UNEP photo exhibtion in the airport. This woman doing a hair flip and this "Jamping polar bear" (sic) were the best photos.

I was on my way to MR's dorm, which was off in the suburb of Aobadai. I chose the cheap way, so had a ridiculously long ride with 2 transfers.


"Women Only... On weekdays, the last car of selected up-bound commuter limited express trains is for women only"
No Chikan. I briefly considered trying to sneak in and see if it'd work, but I didn't have fake eyelashes, have a flashy wardrove or speak in an unnaturally high voice so it wouldn't work.

There was a 4-masted windmill in between 2 of the train stations near Narita.

I saw a Jap Miffy ad, which was amusing, since the first time I saw Miffy, I thought it was another Jap abomination (just try putting her and Hello Kitty side by side).

Most Japanese train station ticket gates are open. Although this means you can go through them in either direction, it made me wonder why people didn't just underpay or better yet, run through the ticket gates without buying a ticket. (Stay tuned for the answer)


"Movie
Sports
Music
Book
Disney
Adult"
I love how "Disney" was above "Adult". I was told that most of the products were porn. After grocery shopping (below) we went in to have a look, and 90% was porn (all Japanese, amazingly - it must be due to protectionism [they do have foreign porn, but they have to censor it and domestic demand probably doesn't like it much]), 7% gravure, 1% sex-related stuff (eg Tenga Cup and underwear in a packet with a girl's photograph), 1% assorted goods (e.g. nail clippers) and 1% non-sex-related DVDs (Disney etc).


Menu of dinner place. Calories are listed.


I had 'Southern Barbarian' style chicken - chicken in a general sweet sauce, with maybe a little chili (just for colour).

At dinner, there were 2 schoolgirls outside, and one squatted down to look at the menu, with predictable results. GAH GAH GAH.


Jeansmate - where you can buy jeans 24/7.


Something I didn't expect to see: Tesco products at the supermarket.


Bamboo

All the cold green tea sold in Japan has no sugar, whereas virtually all cold green tea sold outside it in Singapore does.


I don't know whether these were tied up because they were Hentai or because they didn't want kids reading them.


Tied-up dog outside grocery place.

Future days will have many more pictures.
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