"Only exceptionally rational men can afford to be absurd." - Allan Goldfein

***

Quotes:

I sometimes wonder what I've done to myself. I give you such long assignments I have to mark.

[On 3 hours of doing the same thing] Come at 11 or 12 or 1. I think what I will do is keep scrolling through the answers... Pick up when you're there and I'll just keep going and going and going... So come whenever you want.

[On someone who cut her hair to butch length and looks better] Her features are a bit masculine... And she has a moustache.

The second question I keep getting on this assignment at this time of year is: 'Are you going to do this to me in the exam?'... For Pete's sake, I have some sense. This is not something I expect you to be able to do in a 2 hour exam... To a certain extent you have to trust me, that I know what I'm doing to you.

It's my job to figure out a grade distribution. If you don't do well, it's not me, it's due to your brilliant classmates.

[On last semester's guinea pigs] In every way, what they had to go through was worse than what you'll have to do - don't tell them.

I've had people do this in an exam before, not at Honours level... They write on the exam: 'I didn't have time to study this, but I know that... the labour abundant factor will benefit'.

[On changes in USP students] The year ones... They're all so androgynous.

I have no, I think some people do like it, I have no interest in demoralising my students... There's always one question there that'll freak out a bunch of you.

You guys are filled with panic, but this is the time when I have to let you know how much joy [it was]. It's a pleasure with you guys, coming to work.

[On the control principle and freedom] There's something - *mmh!* inside you that is not determined by anybody else.

Why is he a bad person? He had a troubled childhood. He wasn't breastfed... He played violent video games.

[On module approval] They were only interested in the grading of the assignments. They wanted them to be spaced out. There wasn't any feedback on the intellectual content.

Every Thursday we come in and we're expected so spick (speak)

Your teachers all come from very different backgrounds, and we all have different views of the world and we all think we're right.

For me, it was very hard to guess what you want. For the first set of readings I spent 1 hour on Google googling the meanings of the wordso n the first page.

We talked about material culture, but I don't recall any articles. Or maybe I didn't read them.

I thought Singaporean Studies modules must be taught by Singaporean lecturers [Instructor: Isn't that racist?] (Singapore)

We were discussing NUS students and he said: 'Okay, we can get some good ones, but in general it's general apathetic mediocrity.'

[On Singapore] Any negative stereotypes that I heard before, aside from the food and the sun - that was very true...

[Indian student on India module] If I don't get a B+ at leastI'm never goinna walk into a Hindu temple again.

Nothing comes from nothing right? You know the song? [Student: No.] Nothing come from nothing. Nothing ever could. The Julia Andrews principle. It's from - nevermind. (Julie)

[Student: You said that during our last meeting, you'd tell us about your own religious persuasion.] I can't imagine, I can't imagine why you'd be so interested. [Student 2: It's not in the notes.] It's not in the notes. I was gonna look. I'll come up wih it. I'm a - druid.

People like to talk about Evil like it's a noun. On a dark night, and a full moon and it's creeping around, which is silly.

[On the exam] I hope it's only 2 hours. I can't wait to read the papers, but it gets boring sitting there watching you write.

[On the Geography Honours girls] They started talking about their boobs and they invited the guys to join in.

[On a CD] Why can't I eject it? [Me: Because you're using a Mac]

lower temperature than the saul (soil)

Our group is presenting XXX. The group members are [his name], XXX *flashes laser pointer*, XXX *flashes laser pointer*, XXX *flashes laser pointer*.

sair'ch'err't (sachet)

I'll give you something to think about that I read online: if God doesn't believe in atheists, then they don't exist. [Me: That's if you take the New Age Transcendent view that-] Dude, no. It's just something I read online.

Repeat after me. Il y a un. Kangarou. [Student 2: It means 'I fuck kangaroos'] No it doesn't. Il y a un kangarou. Sous mon lit. [Student 2: 'I give blowjobs to kangaroos'] (Kangourou) [Ed: The words were written on the whiteboard]

[On girls] They're always like that. [They] say [they're] not hungry, then half an hour later: 'Let's go for dinner'.

After the exam period is when you find people getting attached. They study together... They form strong bonds... 'But now is not the time'.

For one of my modules you can choose between bringing in the textbook or two pages of notes. [Me: So what was your choice?] Textbook. You can write in the textbook.

[To female student] Are you PGP Block X, XX-XX? [Student 2: He's been spying on your naked!]

[To me] How come today you dressed so nice? Social experiment ah? (you're dressed so nicely today)

Business School is to train you up to fit into the Capitalist system. It should be renamed 'School of Slaves'.