My Grand Tour of England and Wales - Part 6 of 6
Day 11 - Lord of the Rings-Kensington Palace-British Library-Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
On Thursday, I went to look at the Lord of The Rings exhibition which was being held at the Science Museum. The ticket was expensive - 9 pounds 95, plus 1 pound for Internet pre-booking, without which getting a ticket would've been impossible, as for last year's James Bond exhibition. The exhibition was fantastic, though it being advertised as being a travelling exhibition that would make only one stop (London) in Europe, leading me to suspect that it may come to Singapore with a ticket price substantially below what I paid.
Many props and costumes used in the film were on display, and I could ogle at them closely. The weapons all had tediously verbose inscriptions on them, but maybe they aid in battle, so. And of course there was the trivia: some of the Riders of Rohan were women with beards glued on them, and Viggo Mortensen bought his horse after filming because he'd grown so attached to it. There were also many "making of" videos. Among them, Gollum and Andy Serkis saying lines side by side, with hauntingly similar facial expressions (a testament to their face modelling and motion capture software) The way they "filmed" the battle scenes was intriguing - instead of modelling each soldier individually, they made each soldier a semi-sentient autonomous agent, with pre-defined fighting styles and behavior.
However, they were careful not to show or say anything about Return of the King. Coupled with the removal of some items which were being used for filming of Return of the King, that made the exhibition somewhat incomplete. Also, there were no chairs, so when my feet were finally giving out after viewing much of the extensive exhibition, I had to sit on the floor.
After the exhibition and in the underpass on the way to the tube station, I saw one of the rare violin buskers (you don't find any in Singapore). He kept playing the first part of Bach's Chaconne, which led me to suspect he didn't know the latter parts. My curiosity piqued, I dropped a pound and asked if he knew any Paganini. He tried playing Caprice 24 but unfortunately only managed the introductions, before being stumped and saying he needed "practice".
Leaving the busker behind, I got conned by the tube as a train didn't go where it was said to go, but eventually I ended up at Kensington Palace.
Looking at furnished interiors and Edwardian royal exhibits does not normally raise my eyebrows, but Kensington Palace was rather interesting. Ossified rituals notwithstanding, the ostrich feather plumes worn by the female wax models were cute, and it was amusing to learn that the men wore 2 sets of stockings to prevent their leg hair from being visible, and carried to court hats that couldn't be worn. In a special exhibition of Diana's dresses, commentary was available for every single one of them. I didn't want to go mad, so I skipped the commentary for most of them.
My next stop was the British Library. The exhibition "Painted Labyrinth - the World of the Lindisfarne Gospels" was on, and to flesh out the exhibition, they sneakily included a lot of non-Lindisfarne related material, going so far as to include material from China and Japan in a "Beyond The Known World" section. After a short while browsing, though, my feet gave out and I had to retreat to a place where I could sit. When I'd recovered sufficiently, I scurried hurriedly through the "Treasures of the British Library" gallery, because somehow I was under the impression that it closed at 6pm. The gallery was an eye opener as it had many significant (a term I used to diss in Sec 2, for it was overused and overrated, but which is appropriate here) objects, like the text of Beowulf, a Gutenburg bible and the last 2 copies of the 1215 Magna Carta (so now I've seen all 4). By the time I'd looked through everything, my feet were giving out again, so I couldn't look at the exciting-sounding "Rare Books and Music" gallery.
Collecting the ticket for Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, the last musical I was to watch, was my last task. For 25 pounds or so, it came with a free dinner (yet another lastminute.com deal) at "Break in the Border", an American restaurant beside the theatre. Here, not only did I not have to cajole the staff for water, but 2 cups came to me, the former with ice cubes and a slice of lemon - a pleasant contrast to the previous day's dinner. My appetiser was a trifle small - "half a rack" of ribs turned out to be only 3 bones' worth: maybe the ribs were of a piglet. The main course was adequate though, and tasted fine, and the person who planned the menu was very considerate, including a vegetarian option. I saw that there was a children's menu for 2 pounds 95, which sounded suspiciously cheap, but didn't pursue the matter.
While killing time before the show, I saw a sign outside a cafe advertising what must have been the cheapest English Breakfast in the world. A set with "2 Fried Eggs, Bacon, Cumberland Sausage, Grilled Mushroom, Baked Beans, Tomato, Toast" was advertised as selling for 50 pence. I was more than a little suspicious, so I went in to look at the menu and the real price was 4 pounds 95. I asked the man at the counter, and he agreed that 50 pence was "not possible". However, the lettering of the price looked genuine, so it was unlikely to have been stuck there by a vandal. One possibility is that the sign used to say 4 pounds 50, but someone removed the "4". However, the current price was 4 pounds 95, so the owners must not have bothered with correcting the sign in the long period of time since the vandalism (since there was a price increase in the interim), perhaps reasoning that it'd draw customers. In fact for all we know, the fake price could have been put there by the owners themselves to con customers!
In contrast to my seats for Joseph and Bombay Dreams, I got a seat in the "Upper Circle" for Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. Now, I've sat in Circle seats before, but I never knew "Upper" Circles existed. Sitting in my seat and looking down on the stage, I felt dizzy and the air seemed rarefied (or maybe it was the large crowd and poor ventilation). Further, there was so little leg room I feared getting Deep Vein Thrombosis (Economy Class Syndrome) In front of me was a binoculars for hire, for 50p, like in the Apollo Victoria. This led me to wonder if the 50p was a deposit, to be returned when the binoculars was returned, as it would be tedious to go around to all the seats to collect them, there was no slot in the holder to remove the coins from and because if not there'd be no incentive to return the binoculars.
Sitting at the top did have its perks, though, For one you can see the lines of the trapdoors from that dizzying height. Luckily, when the show started, many of us in the "Upper Circle" moved forward, as did I, so I finally could see the whole stage and stretch my legs.
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang:
- They made fun of Bulgaria - on the map "Vulgaria" was located approximately where Bulgaria is today
- They praised the English: "We have to be less Vulgar and more English"
- The parts where the dogs ran around on stage were fun. They're coming up with more and more gimmicks for musicals these days.
- There were many pointless numbers which were just excuses to dance and sing (ala Spirited Away excuse to draw)
- Why does the Baroness of Vulgaria hate children so much?
- The hissing of the Childcatcher is irritating
- This show was the most crowd-pleasing of the three. Probably was the children cheering.
- The female lead kept trying to sing like Julie Andrews. The one in the movie did that too, so maybe it was deliberate
- At least they didn't affect fake modesty and run off the stage after a first bow
When I got back I was hungry, so Hwa kindly drove me to the Chinese takeaway. The spring roll I bought from there, though, had leek inside. Argh.
Back to Singapore
I didn't see the point of taking a 30 pound airport shuttle, so I took the tube to Heathrow, something Jie and Hwa were somehow dead against doing. It was tolerable though and didn't take too long.
At Heathrow I was bored so I tried, for the first time, one of those prize grabbing machines which readers may know better as the "UFO Catcher". I was tempted by the watches and the 5 pound notes in casings which were up for grabs, but I was wondering what the catch was, as was this guy looking on. After 3 tries, I realised. Aiming the grabber is not that hard in and of itself even though you can only move in 2 directions, and once each too, but the casings (I was aiming for the 5 pound notes) were slippery and the grip of the grabber was awkward and lousy. So in the end I gained nothing except knowledge of how these machines make money.
Looking in the bookstore, I noticed that among the varied selection was a porn mag "for women" (niche market?) and smut for men, mostly S&M, at the top shelf of the "thriller" section (the most suitable place for those, I suppose).
While waiting for the plane, this teen girl took a picture of her teddy bear with a camera in its lap, and smarties beside its hand. She said her bear had been to New Zealand, Germany and some other places. Her mother then remarked that she felt embarassed. Maybe I should have brought Blue Bear out.
KLIA had an interesting sanitiser in the toilet. Basically it sprayed liquid onto a tissue which you would use to wipe the toilet seat. In retrospect this makes a lot of sense because, since Muslims use water to wash their butts after defecation, the water you often see scattered on the toilet seat is of dubious provenance and the seat should be sterilised.
Misc notes:
At King's Cross St Pancreas station, there was an ever-so-subtle sign about CCTV, anti-social behavior and public toilets being available above.
Jiggling looks awfully uncomfortable. I wonder how people can stand it.
I got asked for spare change again. I asked the person if he had anything to eat, and when he replied in the negative, I gave him an extra stuffed honey mustard chicken roll which my sister had given me for lunch but which I'd not eaten. Last I saw as I was walking away, he was unwrapping it. Later, another person accosted me, but he was more disheveled, less in possession of his wits and was using a Guiness mug (of all things!) to collect change, so his face just read "drunkard".
Why, for photographs in their portfolio or profile (at least in theatre programmes) do people like black and white shots? Is it so we can't see the makeup so easily?
I think there's something wrong with my brown walking shoes. Even my SAF boots don't stink as easily though they extend past the ankle. Maybe they're infected with fungus.
Why are orchestra conductors all men?
In the end I saved 107 pounds 35 pence with my Great Britain Heritage Pass. That's about S$308, so I doubled my investment.
Clapping during performances is really annoying. Not only does it drown out the performers, you show contempt for the performer's sense of timing (then again for modern performers, this contempt may not be misplaced), some people can't clap properly, and the audience never knows when there's a ritardando or accelerando, and the clapping then becomes out of sync with the performance.
Apparently Ma-laysia Airlines was voted one of the world's top 5 airlines in a 2003 global survey. Wah. But I think this was for Business Class only - in Economy Class, to save money they give plastic cutlery instead of metal. Or maybe this is a "security" measure after 9/11. Bah. It's not even a steak knife. There's one thing I absolutely abhor about MAS though - their interminable advertisements for KLIA, played on long haul flights into KL.
Muslims are very considerate. A larger proportion of their television broadcasts (as compared to the "West") have someone translating into sign language in a small box in the corner of the screen.
The reason why people who dye their hair blonde are instantly recognisable as having done so is that dyed blonde hair, unlike naturally blonde hair, is of a uniform shade, where naturally blonde hair has substantial colour texture.
Much has been said about Muslims using water and their hands to wash up after defecation, but I find that using toilet paper in conjunction with this method is ultimately cleaner than using toilet paper alone, and results in less discomfort and inconvenience later.
L'origine de Bert
Saturday, October 18, 2003
Many soldiers, same letter - Newspapers around U.S. get identical missives from Iraq - How low can they sink?
The Asian Squat
Bus turns over on I-94 - Hyles-Anderson College students were heading to Chicago for ministry work - "passengers were standing in the aisle, singing and rocking back and forth," causing the driver to lose control of the bus.
Librarian Action Figure - With push button shushing!
Make your own Artificial Vagina - Courtesy of Melvin
How to Tell When a Relationship is Over
Electron Band Structure In Germanium, My Ass - "Abstract: The exponential dependence of resistivity on temperature in germanium is found to be a great big lie. My careful theoretical modeling and painstaking experimentation reveal 1) that my equipment is crap, as are all the available texts on the subject and 2) that this whole exercise was a complete waste of my time."
Who was the worst Catholic saint?:
* Be nonexistent. In Christianity's early days sainthood was a matter of popular acclaim. When the church formalized canonization in the 13th century, the traditional saints were grandfathered in, but later historical review found no reliable information about many of them and some appeared never to have existed at all. One egregious example is Saint Josaphat, who supposedly was the son of an East Indian king who persecuted his Christian subjects. When it was foretold that his son would become a Christian, the king had him brought up in confinement, but the son converted anyway. Scholars eventually realized this was actually the legend of the Buddha tricked out in Christian disguise.
Then there's Saint Ursula, said to have been martyred along with 11,000 virgin companions in 451 at Cologne. Although it's possible some women were martyred in that city at some point, the notion of there ever having been 11,000 virgins in one place at one time ultimately proved too much for even true believers to swallow, and veneration of Ursula was suppressed.
When Pope Paul VI revised the canon of saints in 1969, some traditional saints were downgraded because of doubts about their stories, if not necessarily their existence. Saint Christopher, for example, is thought to have been martyred under the Roman emperor Decius in the third century, but nothing else is known about him. The well-known story about his having carried the Christ child across a river--the kid supposedly became staggeringly heavy because he bore the weight of the world--is now recognized as pious fiction.
Not all fabrications about saints can be attributed to medieval simpletons. Take the case of Saint Philomena. In 1802 the bones of a girl between 13 and 15 years old, plus a vial of what was believed to be dried blood, were found in a catacomb in Rome. An inscription said, "Peace be with thee, Philomena" and included depictions of anchors, arrows, and a palm. Impressionable souls leaped to the conclusion that these were the tokens of a virgin martyr. A cult sprang up and hundreds of miracles were attributed to Philomena's intercession. Other devout persons of the era, several of whom went on to become canonized themselves, implored Pope Gregory XVI to start the canonization process, and devotions to Philomena were authorized in 1837. Reason eventually reasserted itself and Philomena was removed from the calendar of saints in 1961.
* Be crazy. Where to start? Paging through Butler's Lives we find the story of Saint Christina the Astonishing, who was unable to bear the smell of human beings. "She lived by begging, dressed in rags, and in many ways behaved in a very terrifying manner," we are told. "There is little in the recorded history of Christina . . . to make us think she was other than a pathological case."
What Really Happened (Pre-911 Page) - Collection of shrill and improbable conspiracy theories. Why people give such great credence is beyond me.
The Freenet Project - philosophy - beginner (Extract)
Why is the freedom to share ideas and opinions so important? There are several ways to answer this question:
1. Communication is what makes us human
2. Knowledge is good
3. Democracy assumes a well informed population
Censorship and freedom
Consider now that someone had the ability to control the information you have access to. This would give them the ability to manipulate your opinions by hiding some facts from you, by presenting you with lies and censoring anything that contradicted those lies. This is not some Orwellian fiction, it is standard practice for most western governments to lie to their populations.
The solution
The only way to ensure that a democracy will remain effective is to ensure that the government cannot control its population's ability to share information, to communicate. So long as everything we see and hear is filtered, we are not truly free. Freenet's aim is to allow two or more people who wish to share information, to do so.
Isn't censorship sometimes necessary?
There are many who feel that censorship is a good thing in some circumstances. For example, in some European countries propagating information deemed to be racist is illegal. Governments seek to prevent people from advocating ideas which are deemed damaging to society. There are two answers to this however. The first is that you can't allow those in power to impose "good" censorship, without also enabling them to impose "bad" censorship. To impose any form of censorship a government must have the ability to monitor and thus restrict communication. There are already criticisms that the anti-racism censorship in many European countries is hampering legitimate historical analysis of events such as the second world war.
The second argument is that this "good" censorship is counter-productive even when it does not leak into other areas. For example, it is generally more effective when trying to persuade someone of something to present them with the arguments against it, and then answer those arguments. Unfortunately, preventing people from being aware of the often sophisticated arguments used by racists, makes them vulnerable to those arguments when they do eventually encounter them.
Of course the first argument is the stronger one, and would still hold-true even if you didn't accept the second. Basically, you either have censorship, or you don't. There is no middle-ground.
What about child porn, offensive content or terrorism?
While most people wish that child pornography and terrorism did not exist, humanity should not be deprived of their freedom to communicate just because of how a very small number of people might use that freedom.
The ultimate Indian!
An Indian and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York. The American asked if he would like to play a Fun game.The Indian, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.
He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me five dollars, and vice versa."
Again, he declines and tries to get some sleep. The American, now agitated,says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."
This catches the Indian's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game.
The American asks the first question: "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
The Indian doesn't say a word, reaches into his wallet, pulls out a $5.00 bill, and hands it to the American. "Okay," says the American, "your turn".
He asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"
The American, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer & searches all his references........no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress... no answer.
Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the Indian and hands him $500. The Indian thanks him and turns back to get some more sleep.
The American, who is more than a little miffed, stirs the Indian and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Indian reaches into his purse, hands the American $5, and goes back to sleep.
The Asian Squat
Bus turns over on I-94 - Hyles-Anderson College students were heading to Chicago for ministry work - "passengers were standing in the aisle, singing and rocking back and forth," causing the driver to lose control of the bus.
Librarian Action Figure - With push button shushing!
Make your own Artificial Vagina - Courtesy of Melvin
How to Tell When a Relationship is Over
Electron Band Structure In Germanium, My Ass - "Abstract: The exponential dependence of resistivity on temperature in germanium is found to be a great big lie. My careful theoretical modeling and painstaking experimentation reveal 1) that my equipment is crap, as are all the available texts on the subject and 2) that this whole exercise was a complete waste of my time."
Who was the worst Catholic saint?:
* Be nonexistent. In Christianity's early days sainthood was a matter of popular acclaim. When the church formalized canonization in the 13th century, the traditional saints were grandfathered in, but later historical review found no reliable information about many of them and some appeared never to have existed at all. One egregious example is Saint Josaphat, who supposedly was the son of an East Indian king who persecuted his Christian subjects. When it was foretold that his son would become a Christian, the king had him brought up in confinement, but the son converted anyway. Scholars eventually realized this was actually the legend of the Buddha tricked out in Christian disguise.
Then there's Saint Ursula, said to have been martyred along with 11,000 virgin companions in 451 at Cologne. Although it's possible some women were martyred in that city at some point, the notion of there ever having been 11,000 virgins in one place at one time ultimately proved too much for even true believers to swallow, and veneration of Ursula was suppressed.
When Pope Paul VI revised the canon of saints in 1969, some traditional saints were downgraded because of doubts about their stories, if not necessarily their existence. Saint Christopher, for example, is thought to have been martyred under the Roman emperor Decius in the third century, but nothing else is known about him. The well-known story about his having carried the Christ child across a river--the kid supposedly became staggeringly heavy because he bore the weight of the world--is now recognized as pious fiction.
Not all fabrications about saints can be attributed to medieval simpletons. Take the case of Saint Philomena. In 1802 the bones of a girl between 13 and 15 years old, plus a vial of what was believed to be dried blood, were found in a catacomb in Rome. An inscription said, "Peace be with thee, Philomena" and included depictions of anchors, arrows, and a palm. Impressionable souls leaped to the conclusion that these were the tokens of a virgin martyr. A cult sprang up and hundreds of miracles were attributed to Philomena's intercession. Other devout persons of the era, several of whom went on to become canonized themselves, implored Pope Gregory XVI to start the canonization process, and devotions to Philomena were authorized in 1837. Reason eventually reasserted itself and Philomena was removed from the calendar of saints in 1961.
* Be crazy. Where to start? Paging through Butler's Lives we find the story of Saint Christina the Astonishing, who was unable to bear the smell of human beings. "She lived by begging, dressed in rags, and in many ways behaved in a very terrifying manner," we are told. "There is little in the recorded history of Christina . . . to make us think she was other than a pathological case."
What Really Happened (Pre-911 Page) - Collection of shrill and improbable conspiracy theories. Why people give such great credence is beyond me.
The Freenet Project - philosophy - beginner (Extract)
Why is the freedom to share ideas and opinions so important? There are several ways to answer this question:
1. Communication is what makes us human
2. Knowledge is good
3. Democracy assumes a well informed population
Censorship and freedom
Consider now that someone had the ability to control the information you have access to. This would give them the ability to manipulate your opinions by hiding some facts from you, by presenting you with lies and censoring anything that contradicted those lies. This is not some Orwellian fiction, it is standard practice for most western governments to lie to their populations.
The solution
The only way to ensure that a democracy will remain effective is to ensure that the government cannot control its population's ability to share information, to communicate. So long as everything we see and hear is filtered, we are not truly free. Freenet's aim is to allow two or more people who wish to share information, to do so.
Isn't censorship sometimes necessary?
There are many who feel that censorship is a good thing in some circumstances. For example, in some European countries propagating information deemed to be racist is illegal. Governments seek to prevent people from advocating ideas which are deemed damaging to society. There are two answers to this however. The first is that you can't allow those in power to impose "good" censorship, without also enabling them to impose "bad" censorship. To impose any form of censorship a government must have the ability to monitor and thus restrict communication. There are already criticisms that the anti-racism censorship in many European countries is hampering legitimate historical analysis of events such as the second world war.
The second argument is that this "good" censorship is counter-productive even when it does not leak into other areas. For example, it is generally more effective when trying to persuade someone of something to present them with the arguments against it, and then answer those arguments. Unfortunately, preventing people from being aware of the often sophisticated arguments used by racists, makes them vulnerable to those arguments when they do eventually encounter them.
Of course the first argument is the stronger one, and would still hold-true even if you didn't accept the second. Basically, you either have censorship, or you don't. There is no middle-ground.
What about child porn, offensive content or terrorism?
While most people wish that child pornography and terrorism did not exist, humanity should not be deprived of their freedom to communicate just because of how a very small number of people might use that freedom.
The ultimate Indian!
An Indian and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York. The American asked if he would like to play a Fun game.The Indian, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.
The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.
He says, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me five dollars, and vice versa."
Again, he declines and tries to get some sleep. The American, now agitated,says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500."
This catches the Indian's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game.
The American asks the first question: "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"
The Indian doesn't say a word, reaches into his wallet, pulls out a $5.00 bill, and hands it to the American. "Okay," says the American, "your turn".
He asks, "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"
The American, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer & searches all his references........no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress... no answer.
Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the Indian and hands him $500. The Indian thanks him and turns back to get some more sleep.
The American, who is more than a little miffed, stirs the Indian and asks, "Well, what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Indian reaches into his purse, hands the American $5, and goes back to sleep.
Post ID: 106647675616640741
Wednesday, October 15, 2003
5 things just occurred to me. 7 hours before my next class.
a) Studying about drug dependency and abuse, psychotropic drugs... an adverse effect listed for LSD is "bad trips". *Bad trips* is so descriptive - those two words conjure up images of fantasy schoolbuses rampaging off cliffs, flower-power magic carpets crumpling up underneath unsuspecting fun-lovers, hot-air balloons accelerating downwards (to its occupants' gaping horror). You're strapped in the rollercoaster, you're going down the steep end, and you know it derails shortly ... but you can't get off.
b) Friendster- does it still count if the vast majority of my 24 friendsters come from the same, tight-knit social circle?
c) If you huddle under the first name "Raffles", "Melbourne" or "GEP" (with that 20-yr old pyramid logo), please don't add me. I'll reject you and you wouldn't like that, would you? I wouldn't like that either.
d) Just authed debbie and geraldine. Debbie and geraldine please don't take offense if you're reading this ... i had the impression i was authorizing two totally different people. Till it occurred to me (for the umpteenth time) oh yah, i *do* know two debbies both from the same cell group and went to check the info/photos. Also was wondering "since when did little sop-singing fan-of-my-little-pony geraldine wear lipstick and eyeliner?" when i realized it was geraldine-who-lives-across-from-my-block geradline (pink is so your colour!).
e) I really enjoy pharmacology. I have a passion for it the same way that most of my coursemates detest it - with a vengeance. If i had more patience i'd easily picture myself going into drug research in a clinical setting. Maybe that's not so far away.
Panettone anyone? i'm picking up a couple over the next few days.
a) Studying about drug dependency and abuse, psychotropic drugs... an adverse effect listed for LSD is "bad trips". *Bad trips* is so descriptive - those two words conjure up images of fantasy schoolbuses rampaging off cliffs, flower-power magic carpets crumpling up underneath unsuspecting fun-lovers, hot-air balloons accelerating downwards (to its occupants' gaping horror). You're strapped in the rollercoaster, you're going down the steep end, and you know it derails shortly ... but you can't get off.
b) Friendster- does it still count if the vast majority of my 24 friendsters come from the same, tight-knit social circle?
c) If you huddle under the first name "Raffles", "Melbourne" or "GEP" (with that 20-yr old pyramid logo), please don't add me. I'll reject you and you wouldn't like that, would you? I wouldn't like that either.
d) Just authed debbie and geraldine. Debbie and geraldine please don't take offense if you're reading this ... i had the impression i was authorizing two totally different people. Till it occurred to me (for the umpteenth time) oh yah, i *do* know two debbies both from the same cell group and went to check the info/photos. Also was wondering "since when did little sop-singing fan-of-my-little-pony geraldine wear lipstick and eyeliner?" when i realized it was geraldine-who-lives-across-from-my-block geradline (pink is so your colour!).
e) I really enjoy pharmacology. I have a passion for it the same way that most of my coursemates detest it - with a vengeance. If i had more patience i'd easily picture myself going into drug research in a clinical setting. Maybe that's not so far away.
Panettone anyone? i'm picking up a couple over the next few days.
Post ID: 106623296280964679
Tuesday, October 14, 2003
Sunday, October 12, 2003
My Grand Tour of England and Wales - Part 5 of X
Day 10 - Hampton Court-Bombay Dreams-Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat (Cont'd)
At the station where I got off in London, there was a guy peeing in a corner and there was so much pee, it flowed back to him after it hit the ground. I was tempted to take a picture, but he'd have punched me, so.
Bombay Dreams was showing at the Apollo Victoria theatre, and the lobby was veritably full of Indians, mostly old ladies. After collecting my ticket, I had lunch at a nearby Subway because I didn't want to chance being late, and had a Southwest Turkey Bacon sandwich - the hottest sandwich I'd ever had in my life. The menu did not label it as "hot" (as opposed to some other sandwiches), so I shuddered to think of how fiery some of the "hot" sandwiches must have been.
My seat was in row E, 5th from the stage - at only 15 pounds: Lastminute.com is good. Nonetheless, the legroom left much to be desired, so me and this American sitting beside me moved out along the row, only to be thwarted when a couple arrived at the last minute.
Perhaps due to it being a Matinee, the production that I watched was lacking in some ways - in many scenes, the lip synching was obvious to the point that I couldn't hear them singing, especially when they were speaking in what I took to be Hindi. Of course, my noticing this was helped by the revelation last year that musical (and maybe others as well) performances in large theatres always play a pre-recorded track of song, on top of which the performers sing, and my sister playing music from the show to me before I watched it. My scrutiny also revealed to me that what I thought was, in common parlance, known as the 'self-destruct button', was actually their microphones, and the wires were quite obvious trailing down bare backs. Though I wonder where the base units were hidden - perhaps in their underwear, or the cracks of their asses?
Some way into the show, I noticed that some of the "Indians" were actually ang mohs dressed up as Indians (at least half of the ensemble had Caucasian names). All of the eunuchs were Caucasian, for example. Most ironically, the male lead himself was a Caucasian (from the cast lists, I found out he was actually a chorus boy drafted in in the absence of the main lead). Guess they couldn't find enough real Indians.
Generally, the musical was cliched yet still enjoyable. The ending, though, grated. Why is it in vogue these days to include tacky post-modernist, self-referential elements in your productions? Argh.
Other notes on Bombay Dreams:
- They had 2 people to play percussion instruments, each sitting on a raised platform on either side of the stage, and one of them had the classic 'Jesus Christ' look (long, slightly curvy brown hair, moderate length beard and moustache)
- They couldn't hide their UK accents, especially when singing
- The transvestites were funny
- The choreographed mass dance scenes where a million extras appear from nowhere and start dancing were also funny. And I was impressed by the scenes with water fountains and rain
- The jiggling of buns and breasts was funny
- The Ms World headdress was freaky
- The pink aerobic costumes were very 'funky', especially the guys' with pink bandanas
- The fight scene with nunchakus was fun
- They didn't wait enough to take their second bow, but the encore piece made up for it
- It's very rare to find a story without love these days. Off the top of my head, I can only think of Cats, the Wizard of Oz and Joseph and the Amazing Techniclour Dreamcoat
- There were binoculars for rent at the back seats - disgusting
- There were primary school kids who came out of the theatre dancing (badly and out of sync) to and singing "Shakalaka Baby" (out of tune)
After Bombay Dreams ended, I had another musical to catch - Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat. The nearest stop to the theatre was Covent Garden and being bored and having time to kill I once again climbed the 201 steps for what I think was at least the 2nd, and maybe the 3rd time. After my ascent, I was sitting by the side of the station to recover but got suffocated by cigarette smoke, so my head remained dizzy for a while.
After collecting my ticket at the New London theatre, I noticed that the place where I'd had a meagre dinner before catching Cats in 2001 was closing. I actually wanted to have dinner there again, but there was no food left. I walked a short distance over to an Indian restaurant, "Spice of London", which claimed to be a branch of a famous restaurant from India, which offered a pre-theatre set menu, including a "dissert of the day" (which so amused me, I took a picture of it). One of the staff probably mistook my photo taking for intense interest in their set, and came out, describing the Lamb Tariwala as "spicy". I figured that, this being a place catering to Ang Moh palletes, I should be okay. Besides, I think I'd passed it over for the joint that was now closing down 2 years ago, so I figured I should give it a shot.
So it turned out that I was right. The Lamb Tariwala tasted of a pleasant blend of spices, and in fact was less hot than the sandwich I'd had for lunch. The Naan was crisp and the rice fragrant. There was good food, and good service to boot, though I had to press the waiter before he served me tap water, attempting to pull off the "still or sparkling?" routine when I first asked, which I naturally did not fall for.
Entering the New London theatre and going up the escalator, it was striking how many shows had run at the theatre from 1973-1981, but only one from 1981-2002. I noticed that they'd done extensive renovations since Cats, with its unique stage, had vacated the theatre. At least half of the seats must have been reconfigured. As with Bombay Dreams, I got an amazingly good seat which also cost around 15 pounds, but that may partially have been because the theatre was rather empty.
From the start, Joseph struck me as being very much tied to its start as a school musical. From having a narrator, the campy children's choir, and a wealth of American cultural references, to the blow up sheep and Egyptian Cheerleaders, the music largely played on synthesisers and the corniness, it just screamed "school musical". There were notable attempts at making it look less cheapskate (eg fire eating, Brazillian dancers) but overall, they didn't succeed. But then, maybe they didn't want to.
I liked the lack of any direct, and the few indirect, references to Jehovah, in keeping with the spirit of the musical. But unlike most other musicals, the performers' mics were eminently visible. And I doubted Joseph's coat really had as many colours as were sung about in the song, though ("It was red and yellow and green and brown, And scarlet and black and ocher and peach, And ruby and olive and violet and fawn, And lilac and gold and chocolate and mauve, And cream and crimson and silver and rose, And azure and lemon and russet and grey, And purple and white and pink and orange, And red and yellow and green and brown, Scarlet and black and ocher and peach, And ruby and olive and violet and fawn, And lilac and gold and chocolate and mauve, And cream and crimson and silver and rose, And azure and lemon and russet and grey, And purple and white and pink and orange, And blue.")
Strikingly, Joseph had the most protracted encore scene I'd ever seen, which managed to get most of the small audience off their butts and up clapping and singing, except for a bellicose, diehard group centred around me which stubbornly remained seated. One happy side-effect of the cast's encouraging of everyone to stand up and sing along was that they got a free standing ovation at the end!
Misc notes:
Hwa is terrible at doing housekeeping. His camera's memory card still had images from before my last visit on it.
Some grafiti is quite well done, with artistic merit, even.
In some ways, the shadow of the SAF lingered over me - I even had (bad) dreams of camp, and often I found myself not enjoying myself as much as I should have.
There was this female tube driver whose verbosity rivaled that of the pre-recorded announcements in SMRT stations. At each station, she would offer a verbose, informative and polite announcement. Another day, there was a man doing an announcement over the PA system in the station with a level of enthusiasm approaching that of a football commentator - he told the ladies the next train would have no seats, but the gentlemen'd surely give up their seats for them.
The travel time from Leicester Square station to Covent Garden is about 2 seconds. What's the point? What's the point, too, of playing announcements in both the train and the station? The result is that neither will be heard nor heeded.
The Indian restaurant I had dinner in on Wednesday had this green (jade?) sculpture of a dragon and phoenix, with a ball rotated by flowing water - a uniquely chinese artifact.
They still sell 500ml bottles of Coke in London, unlike evil Singapore where we've had 390ml bottles at 500ml prices for many few months already.
I declined beggars' pleas throughout my trip. Yeh. I actually saw an anti-begging poster saying 80% of the money's used for drugs and alcohol - I don't know about that.
I wonder how the British stand summer with few fans and even fewer air-conditioners.
TO BE CONTINUED - The End Is Nigh
Day 10 - Hampton Court-Bombay Dreams-Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat (Cont'd)
At the station where I got off in London, there was a guy peeing in a corner and there was so much pee, it flowed back to him after it hit the ground. I was tempted to take a picture, but he'd have punched me, so.
Bombay Dreams was showing at the Apollo Victoria theatre, and the lobby was veritably full of Indians, mostly old ladies. After collecting my ticket, I had lunch at a nearby Subway because I didn't want to chance being late, and had a Southwest Turkey Bacon sandwich - the hottest sandwich I'd ever had in my life. The menu did not label it as "hot" (as opposed to some other sandwiches), so I shuddered to think of how fiery some of the "hot" sandwiches must have been.
My seat was in row E, 5th from the stage - at only 15 pounds: Lastminute.com is good. Nonetheless, the legroom left much to be desired, so me and this American sitting beside me moved out along the row, only to be thwarted when a couple arrived at the last minute.
Perhaps due to it being a Matinee, the production that I watched was lacking in some ways - in many scenes, the lip synching was obvious to the point that I couldn't hear them singing, especially when they were speaking in what I took to be Hindi. Of course, my noticing this was helped by the revelation last year that musical (and maybe others as well) performances in large theatres always play a pre-recorded track of song, on top of which the performers sing, and my sister playing music from the show to me before I watched it. My scrutiny also revealed to me that what I thought was, in common parlance, known as the 'self-destruct button', was actually their microphones, and the wires were quite obvious trailing down bare backs. Though I wonder where the base units were hidden - perhaps in their underwear, or the cracks of their asses?
Some way into the show, I noticed that some of the "Indians" were actually ang mohs dressed up as Indians (at least half of the ensemble had Caucasian names). All of the eunuchs were Caucasian, for example. Most ironically, the male lead himself was a Caucasian (from the cast lists, I found out he was actually a chorus boy drafted in in the absence of the main lead). Guess they couldn't find enough real Indians.
Generally, the musical was cliched yet still enjoyable. The ending, though, grated. Why is it in vogue these days to include tacky post-modernist, self-referential elements in your productions? Argh.
Other notes on Bombay Dreams:
- They had 2 people to play percussion instruments, each sitting on a raised platform on either side of the stage, and one of them had the classic 'Jesus Christ' look (long, slightly curvy brown hair, moderate length beard and moustache)
- They couldn't hide their UK accents, especially when singing
- The transvestites were funny
- The choreographed mass dance scenes where a million extras appear from nowhere and start dancing were also funny. And I was impressed by the scenes with water fountains and rain
- The jiggling of buns and breasts was funny
- The Ms World headdress was freaky
- The pink aerobic costumes were very 'funky', especially the guys' with pink bandanas
- The fight scene with nunchakus was fun
- They didn't wait enough to take their second bow, but the encore piece made up for it
- It's very rare to find a story without love these days. Off the top of my head, I can only think of Cats, the Wizard of Oz and Joseph and the Amazing Techniclour Dreamcoat
- There were binoculars for rent at the back seats - disgusting
- There were primary school kids who came out of the theatre dancing (badly and out of sync) to and singing "Shakalaka Baby" (out of tune)
After Bombay Dreams ended, I had another musical to catch - Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat. The nearest stop to the theatre was Covent Garden and being bored and having time to kill I once again climbed the 201 steps for what I think was at least the 2nd, and maybe the 3rd time. After my ascent, I was sitting by the side of the station to recover but got suffocated by cigarette smoke, so my head remained dizzy for a while.
After collecting my ticket at the New London theatre, I noticed that the place where I'd had a meagre dinner before catching Cats in 2001 was closing. I actually wanted to have dinner there again, but there was no food left. I walked a short distance over to an Indian restaurant, "Spice of London", which claimed to be a branch of a famous restaurant from India, which offered a pre-theatre set menu, including a "dissert of the day" (which so amused me, I took a picture of it). One of the staff probably mistook my photo taking for intense interest in their set, and came out, describing the Lamb Tariwala as "spicy". I figured that, this being a place catering to Ang Moh palletes, I should be okay. Besides, I think I'd passed it over for the joint that was now closing down 2 years ago, so I figured I should give it a shot.
So it turned out that I was right. The Lamb Tariwala tasted of a pleasant blend of spices, and in fact was less hot than the sandwich I'd had for lunch. The Naan was crisp and the rice fragrant. There was good food, and good service to boot, though I had to press the waiter before he served me tap water, attempting to pull off the "still or sparkling?" routine when I first asked, which I naturally did not fall for.
Entering the New London theatre and going up the escalator, it was striking how many shows had run at the theatre from 1973-1981, but only one from 1981-2002. I noticed that they'd done extensive renovations since Cats, with its unique stage, had vacated the theatre. At least half of the seats must have been reconfigured. As with Bombay Dreams, I got an amazingly good seat which also cost around 15 pounds, but that may partially have been because the theatre was rather empty.
From the start, Joseph struck me as being very much tied to its start as a school musical. From having a narrator, the campy children's choir, and a wealth of American cultural references, to the blow up sheep and Egyptian Cheerleaders, the music largely played on synthesisers and the corniness, it just screamed "school musical". There were notable attempts at making it look less cheapskate (eg fire eating, Brazillian dancers) but overall, they didn't succeed. But then, maybe they didn't want to.
I liked the lack of any direct, and the few indirect, references to Jehovah, in keeping with the spirit of the musical. But unlike most other musicals, the performers' mics were eminently visible. And I doubted Joseph's coat really had as many colours as were sung about in the song, though ("It was red and yellow and green and brown, And scarlet and black and ocher and peach, And ruby and olive and violet and fawn, And lilac and gold and chocolate and mauve, And cream and crimson and silver and rose, And azure and lemon and russet and grey, And purple and white and pink and orange, And red and yellow and green and brown, Scarlet and black and ocher and peach, And ruby and olive and violet and fawn, And lilac and gold and chocolate and mauve, And cream and crimson and silver and rose, And azure and lemon and russet and grey, And purple and white and pink and orange, And blue.")
Strikingly, Joseph had the most protracted encore scene I'd ever seen, which managed to get most of the small audience off their butts and up clapping and singing, except for a bellicose, diehard group centred around me which stubbornly remained seated. One happy side-effect of the cast's encouraging of everyone to stand up and sing along was that they got a free standing ovation at the end!
Misc notes:
Hwa is terrible at doing housekeeping. His camera's memory card still had images from before my last visit on it.
Some grafiti is quite well done, with artistic merit, even.
In some ways, the shadow of the SAF lingered over me - I even had (bad) dreams of camp, and often I found myself not enjoying myself as much as I should have.
There was this female tube driver whose verbosity rivaled that of the pre-recorded announcements in SMRT stations. At each station, she would offer a verbose, informative and polite announcement. Another day, there was a man doing an announcement over the PA system in the station with a level of enthusiasm approaching that of a football commentator - he told the ladies the next train would have no seats, but the gentlemen'd surely give up their seats for them.
The travel time from Leicester Square station to Covent Garden is about 2 seconds. What's the point? What's the point, too, of playing announcements in both the train and the station? The result is that neither will be heard nor heeded.
The Indian restaurant I had dinner in on Wednesday had this green (jade?) sculpture of a dragon and phoenix, with a ball rotated by flowing water - a uniquely chinese artifact.
They still sell 500ml bottles of Coke in London, unlike evil Singapore where we've had 390ml bottles at 500ml prices for many few months already.
I declined beggars' pleas throughout my trip. Yeh. I actually saw an anti-begging poster saying 80% of the money's used for drugs and alcohol - I don't know about that.
I wonder how the British stand summer with few fans and even fewer air-conditioners.
TO BE CONTINUED - The End Is Nigh
Post ID: 106606914971821352
I have been attached back. This gives me one less reason to complain about 42's torture of me, however futilely. I'm quite sure there is/was *some* way I could complain about what they did, but I don't know how. On the bright side, though, since I returned, I haven't been tortured too badly, both because of block leave and my CSM going on course. However, improbably, the madness of my company has recently reached new heights (or depths). Among other things, they want to check our bags before booking out, have roll calls after booking in and disallow staying out for medical appointments. They actually wanted to stop us leaving the day before our proper day of leave or off, but thankfully they revoked that draconian order. Hopefully, saner heads will prevail and these rules will be relaxed over time, but then we have no power, as tattooed invisibly all over us are the words: "Property of the SAF".
Even if you do accept that National Slavery is essential to guarantee Singapore's safety, we have to ask ourselves: are these ridiculous and unnecessary measures truly necessary to maintain Operational Readiness? Or are they just the sadistic whims of a few people inflicted on the rest to no practical end? Happy soldiers are (more) willing and (more) effective soldiers, so making them miserable does not help you fight a war. There is a reason why the Navy and Air Force are professional organisations made up, for the most part, of regulars, while the Army is just a place where regulars torture NSFs and everyone wastes their time.
Someone formerly from 42SAR was posted to 2SIR, and he tells me that, contrary to what people say about infantry, 2SIR is actually quite slack. They aren't obsessed with BUC, there's no RT (maybe just for his company), there's more freedom and they're less regimental.
Commanders like to say that if their men fail their IPPT and SOC, it is their failure as commanders for not training their men. All very noble and admirable, but unfortunately, the men are the ones who suffer for their commanders' "failures". Taking the blame is nothing - it's the punishment that kills.
Just as Ivan reminds me of Julian, I realise that Vincent reminds me of Luther. It's not just that they are both tall - they both can be corny (the latter more than the former), and have a knack for making certain types of statements which I am at a loss for words to describe.
One reservist MO was giving out his namecard to all the patients he saw. And one reservist corporal was marking geography essays. The joys of reservist life.
We were discussing how to raise productivity, and hit on the idea of using computers to answer calls, as many companies do nowadays. On calling, you caller would hear something like this: "Welcome to the Armour Medical Centre. For English, please press 1. For Mandarin, press 2. If you want Malay, you've dialed the wrong number. Please put down the phone." The caller would then be invited to press a number corresponding to which unit he wished to reach, and put on hold, to be treated from time to time to placating messages such as: "Thank you for waiting. All our operators are currently unavailable. Your call is important to us. For your convenience, a fax line is also available at ***", until someone bothered to pick up the phone or the caller grew so fed up he put down, and soothing music like songs from the recently cut Army Songs album, or "Medics of the Field", the official song of the SAF Medical Corps.
I noticed that SFI's proclaimed mission is to "provide safe and wholesome food". Notice it says nothing about tasty food. I was also always under the impression that safe food is a non-negotiable item. Further, this mission implies that SAF food in the past was neither safe nor wholesome.
I was having a hair cut at the 46 barber, and I noticed that due to the dearth of reading materials, people usually read what's available while waiting. Old issues of 8 Days and Cleo seem to be all that the barber stocks (since she probably reads both), and most people would have read the former, so you see men reduced to reading Cleo when they would not in any other circumstances. The looks on their faces range from bewilderment to disinterest. Meanwhile, I am mostly smiling condescendingly for among other things, half the magazine is ads, and 3/4 of the remainder is disguised ads (features or pictures of products, with prices and availability).
The ever efficient SAF shot an arrow to someone, and eventually it was passed along to me. That in and of itself wouldn't have been so bad, but I had to do the same task 3 times in a row, increasing in intensity, tedium and detail each time, which meant the first 2 times (and 1 1/2 hrs) were wasted.
The putrid miasma of Singapore, especially that in my camp (all that reclaimed swampland, you see) seems to have given me back my slight cough.
"Lithographer" is an SAF vocation. I am speechless.
The SAF should, in addition to the SAF Counselling Hotline, set up an anonymous channel for complaints. The chain of command just doesn't cut it.
People say I looked rejuvenated after my trip. Let's hope this burst lasts till next June.
The guys got 3 days off for not more than 24 hours of work during the Army Half Marathon. Wah.
Tri-Circle brand locks are very lousy. With his skeleton key, Law managed to open Zhenhao's lock after the latter locked himself out of his cupboard.
On Wednesday and Thursday, I was giving reservists jabs at Khatib and Maju. They get half a day off, and half a day of pay, just to spend 5 mins taking an injection (or two, as the case might be). Wah. Also, the driver who drove me on the first day understood English better than he spoke it, and sensed I had the same problem for Mandarin, so he suggested I speak to him in English, and that he'd reply in Mandarin, which was an excellent arrangement. Later on the same day, the clerk who was with us treated us to some snacks from the canteen because he was ORD-ing in 6 days time. The Khatib canteen had some really innovative food, all of which I was trying for the first time - I had sardines wrapped in a pancake, pastry with some bland mildly salty potato filling and sasane (however you spell it - the chewy thing with sesame seeds on the outside) with a coconut filling (instead of the usual peanut or lotus paste). And then on the second day, Channel 8 was filming at Maju, and I also saw Johann there.
Bob is gone for 2 months, so I should be able to sleep on 2 mattresses. However, others keep stealing them before I can take them, and worse, someone is trying to evict me from my secret garden, reducing me to mono-syllabic utterances. Gah!
The E-Mart in my camp sells Seventeen magazine. Why this is so puzzles me, as I am probably the only NSF who has ever bought this magazine, and then only twice.
I think I am very much a goody two shoes. Maybe 2 year soldiers are more willing to take risks as they have less to lose. At the same time, nothing ventured, nothing gained. However, more attention seems to be paid to me since I am the No 1 enemy of 42SAR.
An X-ray of my soles revealed that I have "bilateral accessory naviculae". So now I know why it always hurts so much.
I was sending this guy to Tengah Airbase at night to report sick, and noticed one medic staring at me. After a while he said, "You're Gabriel Seah right? I'm from RJ too. 1 year your junior". For the life of me, I didn't know who he was. It seems my wanted posters are distributed far and wide (and how come my fellow RJ-ians always get cushy postings?! Gah).
I wonder why the SAF let the Straits Times do a story on DB. Probably it was for PR reasons, but what the article did not say was more telling than what it did. It was interesting to find out what Jehovah's Witnesses do in DB - they get a special T-Shirt and to tend the nursery, cook the food (so there's no cookhouse there?) and feed the fishes. I wonder what happens to non-Jehovah's Witnesses conscientious objectors.
Other interesting facts about DB:
- they get 5 slices of bread for breakfast (we get 4)
- they wake up at 6am (5BX personnel wake at 5:25am, and the rest at 5:45am, at least on paper)
Life
Often, joyous events themselves do not give one that heady a thrill, but recollection of them gives one the time and perspective to appreciate them, and for the events to gain the shimmer that only nostalgia can give falsely them. On the other hand, with time, people remember their past sadness to be less intense than it was, as time has dulled their memory and they desire to be happy.
I wonder why some people like to try to interfere in matters that, if allowed to go on uninterrupted, either will not, or have an infinitesimally small chance of, affecting them. This is all the more puzzling and unpleasant when the gains to others of allowing these events to continue far outweighs the expected loss to the antagonists. Perhaps, in addition to desiring to eliminate, as far as possible, even the smallest of risks to their well-being, these people like to scold others to feel important, and have a fixed idea about the perfect order of the world, and any attempt by others to upset it upsets them.
It's funny. Some people profess to be very religious, but they don't even seem to make the slightest attempt to do the basics of what their religion asks of them.
Piffling matters, observations and thoughts
Timothy Ang's doing history at Cambridge. So maybe my sister will get to teach him. Haha.
A lot of people on Friendster put their real photos up. I'm surprised as people are usually skittish about letting others see their true visage.
I heard the MMPR communicator ring tone play several times while in the MRT one day. Looks like there are other fans out there.
Some people think that only attachments greater than 1MB in size are considered "large". These people apparently have never had to deal with 700kb of attachments flooding their Hotmail Inboxes, almost filling them.
I was eating Walkers Sensations Four Cheese and Red Onion crisps which "combines smooth Red Leicester, full-bodied Cheddar, mellow Gouda and piquant Parmesan. Sweet, tangy red onion is added to make this a deliciously indulgent treat." Unfortunately, I've never tasted the first and can't remember what the third tastes like.
Current affairs
Some teachers attribute the bad english of JC students to their not studying Literature for their O Levels. Pffth. I didn't do Lit for my Os. All you need is adequate exposure and practice. I think the poor English is due more to the failure of our policy of bilingualism (which also contributes to a low level of Mandarin, albeit not as low as English).
"If you can die for your country, why can't you die for yourself?" - Rock Band "Hell On Earth" leader Billy Tourtelot. Indeed.
Why do hackers always hit opposition, anti-PAP and Civil Society websites, and not those of the PAP or government?
OB Markers
Someone was telling me that his female significant other, despite being Malay, dislikes Malays for the same reasons that most Singaporeans who dislike them do. I found this quite interesting, for they tend to be a close-knit lot. Also, it's high time that we face "sensitive" issues instead of clamming up and citing vague threats and concerns. Throwing a veil of silence over something and pretending that it does not exist does not make the problem go away - in fact it is merely a temporary escape, not a solution and meanwhile the problem will stew and grow. Indeed, the artificial silence may merely serve to emphasise the problem more: "It's like being overly polite to someone blind, disabled, etc. You both know he's blind, but you're making him feel worse by trying to be nice and "sensitive" and not talking about it". Imposing a blanket ban on dialogue and discourse regarding racial and religious matters does not make racists or fundamentalists any less prejudiced. Lacking a healthy outlet, such sentiments will fester.
The recent "shocking" study that showed primary school kids only mixed with members of their own race showed that decades of smothering all non-sanitised dialogue on racial issues and trying to force the races to mix does not increase racial understanding. There is a lack of statistical evidence, but from anecdotal evidence, I think it safe to conclude that, and I think Singaporeans will probably agree with me, despite the attempted social engineering, Singaporean society today is not a truly multi-racial one, though neither is it a pluralistic society a la Colonial Malaysia (but then take away government racial quotas on HDB flats and other such policies and we may lapse yet further). Most people have few friends of other races and racist talk and jokes continue to circulate like wildfire. Just because Singaporeans can't say these things publicly does not mean they don't in private, and indeed forbidden fruit is always sweeter. Seeing racially balanced groups of friends prancing about on television does not make people form similarly balanced groups in reality.
Perhaps our society just isn't mature enough to accept this level of healthy discourse, which is truly a pity.
"it IS true that singapore has experienced less racial clashes than neighbouring countries. and in major global events when race becomes
a sensitive issue, singaporeans have managed to stay indifferent, or at the very least, civil." True, but we are not, and never were, the only multi-racial society, and many of the rest are not in as much trouble as the government would have you believe would ensue with its heavy hand lifted.
Of course, all this is debatable, but we will never have hard data to evaluate and perform cost-benefit analysis, so.
In a similar vein, whenever calls go out to liberalise society, a chorus of voices always shouts in unison that our society is not "ready" for the said measures yet. Was Singapore in the 1960s ready for a multi-racial policy? Is our workforce today "ready" to accept CPF cuts? These policies were rammed down the throats of the populace without so much as a "if you please", so why can't they government do the right thing and liberalise society today? Is the spectre of economic or political catastrophe the only thing that can galvanise them?
Quotes:
You don't watch wrestling? [Me: No, my mental state has not degenerated to that level yet.] Oh my god. Your supersonic English
Japanese guys like to degrade Japanese girls. They like to make them pose in degrading positions.
Has Melvin gone back to bunk? [Me: No, he's still here.] He told me he wanted to book out. [Me: He doesn't like to book out. He likes to stay in bunk and eat instant noodles and sleep.] So that his tummy will get bigger and bigger.
Army trains you to eat fast then go back to bunk and sleep.
There are some people who spend 5 hours a day looking for new porn websites... I used to do that during my holidays. [Someone: That was before you discovered child porn. Just go to Kazaa.] **** also looks at child porn. [Someone: I only look, I don't collect. You have... how many gig?]
[Someone: Every site I visit is child porn.] That's because the only sites he visits are child porn ones.
Every new technology is used for child porn. World wide web... Gnutella... Kazaa.
[On child porn] How come I've never seen it? [Someone: That's because he only plays Neopets.]
Who's Duli Yang? [Me: Duli Yang, Maha Mulia, Seri Paduka] Ok, ok, I know.
[On Close Combat Training] Please ensure you have a good view of us jumping in the field and groping each other.
Eh look at the rape high school club. [Someone: Got rape primary school club or not?]
[On our proficiency test] Can moderate what. All fail, then moderate.
[Me: Is Wang trying to corrupt you?] Watersports.
Let's go and look for child porn now [Someone: Third on his list. After scat and watersports]
Even if you do accept that National Slavery is essential to guarantee Singapore's safety, we have to ask ourselves: are these ridiculous and unnecessary measures truly necessary to maintain Operational Readiness? Or are they just the sadistic whims of a few people inflicted on the rest to no practical end? Happy soldiers are (more) willing and (more) effective soldiers, so making them miserable does not help you fight a war. There is a reason why the Navy and Air Force are professional organisations made up, for the most part, of regulars, while the Army is just a place where regulars torture NSFs and everyone wastes their time.
Someone formerly from 42SAR was posted to 2SIR, and he tells me that, contrary to what people say about infantry, 2SIR is actually quite slack. They aren't obsessed with BUC, there's no RT (maybe just for his company), there's more freedom and they're less regimental.
Commanders like to say that if their men fail their IPPT and SOC, it is their failure as commanders for not training their men. All very noble and admirable, but unfortunately, the men are the ones who suffer for their commanders' "failures". Taking the blame is nothing - it's the punishment that kills.
Just as Ivan reminds me of Julian, I realise that Vincent reminds me of Luther. It's not just that they are both tall - they both can be corny (the latter more than the former), and have a knack for making certain types of statements which I am at a loss for words to describe.
One reservist MO was giving out his namecard to all the patients he saw. And one reservist corporal was marking geography essays. The joys of reservist life.
We were discussing how to raise productivity, and hit on the idea of using computers to answer calls, as many companies do nowadays. On calling, you caller would hear something like this: "Welcome to the Armour Medical Centre. For English, please press 1. For Mandarin, press 2. If you want Malay, you've dialed the wrong number. Please put down the phone." The caller would then be invited to press a number corresponding to which unit he wished to reach, and put on hold, to be treated from time to time to placating messages such as: "Thank you for waiting. All our operators are currently unavailable. Your call is important to us. For your convenience, a fax line is also available at ***", until someone bothered to pick up the phone or the caller grew so fed up he put down, and soothing music like songs from the recently cut Army Songs album, or "Medics of the Field", the official song of the SAF Medical Corps.
I noticed that SFI's proclaimed mission is to "provide safe and wholesome food". Notice it says nothing about tasty food. I was also always under the impression that safe food is a non-negotiable item. Further, this mission implies that SAF food in the past was neither safe nor wholesome.
I was having a hair cut at the 46 barber, and I noticed that due to the dearth of reading materials, people usually read what's available while waiting. Old issues of 8 Days and Cleo seem to be all that the barber stocks (since she probably reads both), and most people would have read the former, so you see men reduced to reading Cleo when they would not in any other circumstances. The looks on their faces range from bewilderment to disinterest. Meanwhile, I am mostly smiling condescendingly for among other things, half the magazine is ads, and 3/4 of the remainder is disguised ads (features or pictures of products, with prices and availability).
The ever efficient SAF shot an arrow to someone, and eventually it was passed along to me. That in and of itself wouldn't have been so bad, but I had to do the same task 3 times in a row, increasing in intensity, tedium and detail each time, which meant the first 2 times (and 1 1/2 hrs) were wasted.
The putrid miasma of Singapore, especially that in my camp (all that reclaimed swampland, you see) seems to have given me back my slight cough.
"Lithographer" is an SAF vocation. I am speechless.
The SAF should, in addition to the SAF Counselling Hotline, set up an anonymous channel for complaints. The chain of command just doesn't cut it.
People say I looked rejuvenated after my trip. Let's hope this burst lasts till next June.
The guys got 3 days off for not more than 24 hours of work during the Army Half Marathon. Wah.
Tri-Circle brand locks are very lousy. With his skeleton key, Law managed to open Zhenhao's lock after the latter locked himself out of his cupboard.
On Wednesday and Thursday, I was giving reservists jabs at Khatib and Maju. They get half a day off, and half a day of pay, just to spend 5 mins taking an injection (or two, as the case might be). Wah. Also, the driver who drove me on the first day understood English better than he spoke it, and sensed I had the same problem for Mandarin, so he suggested I speak to him in English, and that he'd reply in Mandarin, which was an excellent arrangement. Later on the same day, the clerk who was with us treated us to some snacks from the canteen because he was ORD-ing in 6 days time. The Khatib canteen had some really innovative food, all of which I was trying for the first time - I had sardines wrapped in a pancake, pastry with some bland mildly salty potato filling and sasane (however you spell it - the chewy thing with sesame seeds on the outside) with a coconut filling (instead of the usual peanut or lotus paste). And then on the second day, Channel 8 was filming at Maju, and I also saw Johann there.
Bob is gone for 2 months, so I should be able to sleep on 2 mattresses. However, others keep stealing them before I can take them, and worse, someone is trying to evict me from my secret garden, reducing me to mono-syllabic utterances. Gah!
The E-Mart in my camp sells Seventeen magazine. Why this is so puzzles me, as I am probably the only NSF who has ever bought this magazine, and then only twice.
I think I am very much a goody two shoes. Maybe 2 year soldiers are more willing to take risks as they have less to lose. At the same time, nothing ventured, nothing gained. However, more attention seems to be paid to me since I am the No 1 enemy of 42SAR.
An X-ray of my soles revealed that I have "bilateral accessory naviculae". So now I know why it always hurts so much.
I was sending this guy to Tengah Airbase at night to report sick, and noticed one medic staring at me. After a while he said, "You're Gabriel Seah right? I'm from RJ too. 1 year your junior". For the life of me, I didn't know who he was. It seems my wanted posters are distributed far and wide (and how come my fellow RJ-ians always get cushy postings?! Gah).
I wonder why the SAF let the Straits Times do a story on DB. Probably it was for PR reasons, but what the article did not say was more telling than what it did. It was interesting to find out what Jehovah's Witnesses do in DB - they get a special T-Shirt and to tend the nursery, cook the food (so there's no cookhouse there?) and feed the fishes. I wonder what happens to non-Jehovah's Witnesses conscientious objectors.
Other interesting facts about DB:
- they get 5 slices of bread for breakfast (we get 4)
- they wake up at 6am (5BX personnel wake at 5:25am, and the rest at 5:45am, at least on paper)
Life
Often, joyous events themselves do not give one that heady a thrill, but recollection of them gives one the time and perspective to appreciate them, and for the events to gain the shimmer that only nostalgia can give falsely them. On the other hand, with time, people remember their past sadness to be less intense than it was, as time has dulled their memory and they desire to be happy.
I wonder why some people like to try to interfere in matters that, if allowed to go on uninterrupted, either will not, or have an infinitesimally small chance of, affecting them. This is all the more puzzling and unpleasant when the gains to others of allowing these events to continue far outweighs the expected loss to the antagonists. Perhaps, in addition to desiring to eliminate, as far as possible, even the smallest of risks to their well-being, these people like to scold others to feel important, and have a fixed idea about the perfect order of the world, and any attempt by others to upset it upsets them.
It's funny. Some people profess to be very religious, but they don't even seem to make the slightest attempt to do the basics of what their religion asks of them.
Piffling matters, observations and thoughts
Timothy Ang's doing history at Cambridge. So maybe my sister will get to teach him. Haha.
A lot of people on Friendster put their real photos up. I'm surprised as people are usually skittish about letting others see their true visage.
I heard the MMPR communicator ring tone play several times while in the MRT one day. Looks like there are other fans out there.
Some people think that only attachments greater than 1MB in size are considered "large". These people apparently have never had to deal with 700kb of attachments flooding their Hotmail Inboxes, almost filling them.
I was eating Walkers Sensations Four Cheese and Red Onion crisps which "combines smooth Red Leicester, full-bodied Cheddar, mellow Gouda and piquant Parmesan. Sweet, tangy red onion is added to make this a deliciously indulgent treat." Unfortunately, I've never tasted the first and can't remember what the third tastes like.
Current affairs
Some teachers attribute the bad english of JC students to their not studying Literature for their O Levels. Pffth. I didn't do Lit for my Os. All you need is adequate exposure and practice. I think the poor English is due more to the failure of our policy of bilingualism (which also contributes to a low level of Mandarin, albeit not as low as English).
"If you can die for your country, why can't you die for yourself?" - Rock Band "Hell On Earth" leader Billy Tourtelot. Indeed.
Why do hackers always hit opposition, anti-PAP and Civil Society websites, and not those of the PAP or government?
OB Markers
Someone was telling me that his female significant other, despite being Malay, dislikes Malays for the same reasons that most Singaporeans who dislike them do. I found this quite interesting, for they tend to be a close-knit lot. Also, it's high time that we face "sensitive" issues instead of clamming up and citing vague threats and concerns. Throwing a veil of silence over something and pretending that it does not exist does not make the problem go away - in fact it is merely a temporary escape, not a solution and meanwhile the problem will stew and grow. Indeed, the artificial silence may merely serve to emphasise the problem more: "It's like being overly polite to someone blind, disabled, etc. You both know he's blind, but you're making him feel worse by trying to be nice and "sensitive" and not talking about it". Imposing a blanket ban on dialogue and discourse regarding racial and religious matters does not make racists or fundamentalists any less prejudiced. Lacking a healthy outlet, such sentiments will fester.
The recent "shocking" study that showed primary school kids only mixed with members of their own race showed that decades of smothering all non-sanitised dialogue on racial issues and trying to force the races to mix does not increase racial understanding. There is a lack of statistical evidence, but from anecdotal evidence, I think it safe to conclude that, and I think Singaporeans will probably agree with me, despite the attempted social engineering, Singaporean society today is not a truly multi-racial one, though neither is it a pluralistic society a la Colonial Malaysia (but then take away government racial quotas on HDB flats and other such policies and we may lapse yet further). Most people have few friends of other races and racist talk and jokes continue to circulate like wildfire. Just because Singaporeans can't say these things publicly does not mean they don't in private, and indeed forbidden fruit is always sweeter. Seeing racially balanced groups of friends prancing about on television does not make people form similarly balanced groups in reality.
Perhaps our society just isn't mature enough to accept this level of healthy discourse, which is truly a pity.
"it IS true that singapore has experienced less racial clashes than neighbouring countries. and in major global events when race becomes
a sensitive issue, singaporeans have managed to stay indifferent, or at the very least, civil." True, but we are not, and never were, the only multi-racial society, and many of the rest are not in as much trouble as the government would have you believe would ensue with its heavy hand lifted.
Of course, all this is debatable, but we will never have hard data to evaluate and perform cost-benefit analysis, so.
In a similar vein, whenever calls go out to liberalise society, a chorus of voices always shouts in unison that our society is not "ready" for the said measures yet. Was Singapore in the 1960s ready for a multi-racial policy? Is our workforce today "ready" to accept CPF cuts? These policies were rammed down the throats of the populace without so much as a "if you please", so why can't they government do the right thing and liberalise society today? Is the spectre of economic or political catastrophe the only thing that can galvanise them?
Quotes:
You don't watch wrestling? [Me: No, my mental state has not degenerated to that level yet.] Oh my god. Your supersonic English
Japanese guys like to degrade Japanese girls. They like to make them pose in degrading positions.
Has Melvin gone back to bunk? [Me: No, he's still here.] He told me he wanted to book out. [Me: He doesn't like to book out. He likes to stay in bunk and eat instant noodles and sleep.] So that his tummy will get bigger and bigger.
Army trains you to eat fast then go back to bunk and sleep.
There are some people who spend 5 hours a day looking for new porn websites... I used to do that during my holidays. [Someone: That was before you discovered child porn. Just go to Kazaa.] **** also looks at child porn. [Someone: I only look, I don't collect. You have... how many gig?]
[Someone: Every site I visit is child porn.] That's because the only sites he visits are child porn ones.
Every new technology is used for child porn. World wide web... Gnutella... Kazaa.
[On child porn] How come I've never seen it? [Someone: That's because he only plays Neopets.]
Who's Duli Yang? [Me: Duli Yang, Maha Mulia, Seri Paduka] Ok, ok, I know.
[On Close Combat Training] Please ensure you have a good view of us jumping in the field and groping each other.
Eh look at the rape high school club. [Someone: Got rape primary school club or not?]
[On our proficiency test] Can moderate what. All fail, then moderate.
[Me: Is Wang trying to corrupt you?] Watersports.
Let's go and look for child porn now [Someone: Third on his list. After scat and watersports]
Post ID: 106593055441059425
Straw Poll:
My sister claims that "ar-tic":
"its wrong lah.
duno what stupid dictionary you use.
its one of the most common singapore mistakes. like 'tew-tion'
also no one will understand u outside sgp if you say that. possibly only malay-sia, where they have v. similar mispronounciations"
But then this is the same person who claims "stoo-dent" is wrong and only "styudent" is correct, and that "mo-damn" (modem) is wrong and only "mo-derm" is right.
OTOH, my source says that: "ooh
semantic matter
the supreme authority on the topic (the OED)
claims that both ar-tic and arktic are both acceptable"
My brother in law recently very kindly lent me his MP3 player, a Frontier Labs Nex IIe. It's light and easy to upload files into. The earphones take some getting used to, as they clip onto the ears, but they offer vibrant sound which brings out the immediacy of some pieces. Earphones also make stereo effects more noticeable. I'm not an audiophile though, so I don't know how they truly compare. Pity it only came with a 128MB CF card (though I can use the one for my camera for this too), so I get sick of the songs quickly.
I bet he's lost the manual, though, so I might not discover some functions.
Seen today:
A woman driving a man. How rare
A 7-11 where one can top up cashcards. Except that you must use cash, and there's a 50 cents surcharge, which is very dumb.
Also, Tung Lok seems to be one of the few restaurants which has resisted the temptation to hire PRCs for its staff.
My sister claims that "ar-tic":
"its wrong lah.
duno what stupid dictionary you use.
its one of the most common singapore mistakes. like 'tew-tion'
also no one will understand u outside sgp if you say that. possibly only malay-sia, where they have v. similar mispronounciations"
But then this is the same person who claims "stoo-dent" is wrong and only "styudent" is correct, and that "mo-damn" (modem) is wrong and only "mo-derm" is right.
OTOH, my source says that: "ooh
semantic matter
the supreme authority on the topic (the OED)
claims that both ar-tic and arktic are both acceptable"
My brother in law recently very kindly lent me his MP3 player, a Frontier Labs Nex IIe. It's light and easy to upload files into. The earphones take some getting used to, as they clip onto the ears, but they offer vibrant sound which brings out the immediacy of some pieces. Earphones also make stereo effects more noticeable. I'm not an audiophile though, so I don't know how they truly compare. Pity it only came with a 128MB CF card (though I can use the one for my camera for this too), so I get sick of the songs quickly.
I bet he's lost the manual, though, so I might not discover some functions.
Seen today:
A woman driving a man. How rare
A 7-11 where one can top up cashcards. Except that you must use cash, and there's a 50 cents surcharge, which is very dumb.
Also, Tung Lok seems to be one of the few restaurants which has resisted the temptation to hire PRCs for its staff.
Post ID: 106588907368405179
Saturday, October 11, 2003
Interesting stuff from Mike's List
Play the staring game, spot the differences between these 2 pictures game or Shoot Teddy Bears.
Extreme Pumpkin Carving
Count Sheep
Hold The Button for as long as you can (even more bo liao than the World Mouseclicking Competition)
Type upside down
WiFi - SM - device that shocks you whenever news of some tragedy is reported
CDs made from corn
Mouse that cleans your hand with light
Interesting stuff from Daypop and Stumbleupon
Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids
Music Label Cashes in by Sharing - A backlash against the evil RIAA
Teenager In Trouble In Inhaler Incident - Suspended for saving girlfriend's life by giving her a whiff of his asthma inhaler
Link to Ancient Rome
Agnosticism / Atheism - Skeptical Inquiry, Freethinking, & Religious Philosophy
Free Personality Tests
Calpundit: The New Model Republican Party - The true face of the Republicans (at least those in Texas). Among other things, their party platform for 2000 advocates striving till "abortion is completely outlawed, Social Security is abolished, the welfare state is completely rolled back, the book of Genesis is taught in science classes, and the federal income tax is abolished."
So what's their hang-up? - the American Teleservices Association, which opposes the National Do Not Call Registry, nonetheless itself dislikes getting unwanted calls from thousands of people. "The ATA received NO WARNING that it was going to get unwanted calls! Not only that, but these unwanted calls were an INCONVENIENCE for the ATA, and WASTED THE ATA'S TIME! I just hope nobody interrupted the ATA's dinner."
Opening a Window on North Korea's Horrors. Defectors Haunted by Guilt Over the Loved Ones Left Behind
Unintended Consequences: Five Years under the DMCA - the Digital Millennium Copyright Act Chills Free Expression and Scientific Research, Jeopardizes Fair Use, Impedes Competition and Innovation and Becomes All-Purpose Ban on Access To Computer Networks.
Study: Wrong impressions helped support Iraq war - 60 percent of Americans held at least one of the following views in polls reported between January and September:
1. U.S. forces found weapons of mass destruction in Iraq,
2. There's clear evidence that Iraqi President Saddam Hussein worked closely with the Sept. 11 terrorists.
3. People in foreign countries generally either backed the U.S.-led war or were evenly split between supporting and opposing it.
Extracts from Dude, Where's My Country, by Michael Moore
The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard Anas platyrhynchos (Aves: Anatidae)
Students toil as Spyware Hunters
The fatal grandeur of the Golden Gate Bridge
2003 Rock Paper Scissors International Championships
Voice for Muslim women terrorised by their families
The Real Patriot Act - Imposing a tax of $1/gallon of petrol to finance Iraq's reconstruction, encourage conservation of oil, weaken OPEC and Wahhabi clerics and reduce the trade deficit? Simplistic, but some valid points are made.
Debunking Edward Said: Edward Said and the Saidists: or Third World Intellectual Terrorism by Ibn Warraq
Can use of Ecstacy cause fatal fever? - Apparently as of 2001, only 87 people had died due to Ecstacy, of the millions of who had used it. So much for mindless anti-drug propaganda.
Forbes.com: Is Sex Necessary? - So much for abstinence: Some studies seem to show that having sex even a few times a week is associated with or causes the following:
- Improved sense of smell
- Reduced risk of heart disease
- Weight loss, overall fitness
- Reduced depression
- Pain-relief
- Less-frequent colds and flu
- Better bladder control
- Better teeth: "Seminal plasma contains zinc, calcium and other minerals shown to retard tooth decay. Since this is a family Web site, we will omit discussion of the mineral delivery system. Suffice it to say that it could be a far richer, more complex and more satisfying experience than squeezing a tube of Crest"
- A happier prostate? : "A study recently published by the British Journal of Urology International asserts that men in their 20s can reduce by a third their chance of getting prostate cancer by ejaculating more than five times a week."
So much for old fashioned morality. Also in the article: gender specific benefits and disadvantages (for men only)
The Mind of A Chinese Man
Chinese walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to Taiwan on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Chinese hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank. He produces the title and everything checks out.The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the Chinese for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Chinese returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The Chinese replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
Ah, the mind of the Chinese...
Play the staring game, spot the differences between these 2 pictures game or Shoot Teddy Bears.
Extreme Pumpkin Carving
Count Sheep
Hold The Button for as long as you can (even more bo liao than the World Mouseclicking Competition)
Type upside down
WiFi - SM - device that shocks you whenever news of some tragedy is reported
CDs made from corn
Mouse that cleans your hand with light
Interesting stuff from Daypop and Stumbleupon
Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids
Music Label Cashes in by Sharing - A backlash against the evil RIAA
Teenager In Trouble In Inhaler Incident - Suspended for saving girlfriend's life by giving her a whiff of his asthma inhaler
Link to Ancient Rome
Agnosticism / Atheism - Skeptical Inquiry, Freethinking, & Religious Philosophy
Free Personality Tests
Calpundit: The New Model Republican Party - The true face of the Republicans (at least those in Texas). Among other things, their party platform for 2000 advocates striving till "abortion is completely outlawed, Social Security is abolished, the welfare state is completely rolled back, the book of Genesis is taught in science classes, and the federal income tax is abolished."
So what's their hang-up? - the American Teleservices Association, which opposes the National Do Not Call Registry, nonetheless itself dislikes getting unwanted calls from thousands of people. "The ATA received NO WARNING that it was going to get unwanted calls! Not only that, but these unwanted calls were an INCONVENIENCE for the ATA, and WASTED THE ATA'S TIME! I just hope nobody interrupted the ATA's dinner."
Opening a Window on North Korea's Horrors. Defectors Haunted by Guilt Over the Loved Ones Left Behind
Unintended Consequences: Five Years under the DMCA - the Digital Millennium Copyright Act Chills Free Expression and Scientific Research, Jeopardizes Fair Use, Impedes Competition and Innovation and Becomes All-Purpose Ban on Access To Computer Networks.
Study: Wrong impressions helped support Iraq war - 60 percent of Americans held at least one of the following views in polls reported between January and September:
1. U.S. forces found weapons of mass destruction in Iraq,
2. There's clear evidence that Iraqi President Saddam Hussein worked closely with the Sept. 11 terrorists.
3. People in foreign countries generally either backed the U.S.-led war or were evenly split between supporting and opposing it.
Extracts from Dude, Where's My Country, by Michael Moore
The first case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard Anas platyrhynchos (Aves: Anatidae)
Students toil as Spyware Hunters
The fatal grandeur of the Golden Gate Bridge
2003 Rock Paper Scissors International Championships
Voice for Muslim women terrorised by their families
The Real Patriot Act - Imposing a tax of $1/gallon of petrol to finance Iraq's reconstruction, encourage conservation of oil, weaken OPEC and Wahhabi clerics and reduce the trade deficit? Simplistic, but some valid points are made.
Debunking Edward Said: Edward Said and the Saidists: or Third World Intellectual Terrorism by Ibn Warraq
Can use of Ecstacy cause fatal fever? - Apparently as of 2001, only 87 people had died due to Ecstacy, of the millions of who had used it. So much for mindless anti-drug propaganda.
Forbes.com: Is Sex Necessary? - So much for abstinence: Some studies seem to show that having sex even a few times a week is associated with or causes the following:
- Improved sense of smell
- Reduced risk of heart disease
- Weight loss, overall fitness
- Reduced depression
- Pain-relief
- Less-frequent colds and flu
- Better bladder control
- Better teeth: "Seminal plasma contains zinc, calcium and other minerals shown to retard tooth decay. Since this is a family Web site, we will omit discussion of the mineral delivery system. Suffice it to say that it could be a far richer, more complex and more satisfying experience than squeezing a tube of Crest"
- A happier prostate? : "A study recently published by the British Journal of Urology International asserts that men in their 20s can reduce by a third their chance of getting prostate cancer by ejaculating more than five times a week."
So much for old fashioned morality. Also in the article: gender specific benefits and disadvantages (for men only)
The Mind of A Chinese Man
Chinese walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to Taiwan on business for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the Chinese hands over the keys to a new Ferrari parked on the street in front of the bank. He produces the title and everything checks out.The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.
The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the Chinese for using a $250,000 Ferrari as collateral against a $5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Chinese returns, repays the $5,000 and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a multi-millionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The Chinese replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
Ah, the mind of the Chinese...
Post ID: 106586330266331382
Thursday, October 09, 2003
My Grand Tour of England and Wales - Part 4 of X
Day 8 - Wales-Stow-on-the-Wold
Leaving Wales, we drove back into England, to Stokesay Castle, which was really a manor house - but a genuine medieval fortified manor house, no less.
After that we went to Hereford Cathedral, home of the Mappa Mundi, placed by some marketing genius at the end of a gallery containing the shop (where I bought a 'kimberly' keychain) and cafe to tempt visitors. The Mappa Mundi was remarkably well-preserved, considering that it was made in the 13th Century, and was much bigger than I thought it would be. In the Cathedral library, they also had a stunning collection of manuscripts from the 12th Century onward, all chained to the shelves.
Next we visited Gloucester Cathedral, where they had a good pamphlet offering a Harry Potter tour (since parts of both films were shot there, in the cloisters). In contrast, Alnwick, which was also used for filming, had nothing related to or about the filming except for some cardboard figures scattered throughout the castle. Among the artefacts scattered throughout the cathedral was a Norman Lead Font (c. 1140) - giving babies brain damage for 850 years!
Though the cathedral was grand, the toilets were horrible. They were smelly, one cubicle door could not close, the light in the one I chose was spoilt and when I pulled out some toilet paper, the cover of the container fell and hit my temple. And they had the cheek to ask for donations!
Outside the cathedral and a street away was what was probably the main street, and there were schoolchildren walking up and down, including 2 schoolgirls with skirts covering only 1/2 - 1/3 of their thighs, without stockings. Now, if even *I* was cold and my legs numbing, I wonder how they stood it.
For the night we stopped at Stow-on-the-Wold, near Stratford-Upon-Avon.
Day 9 - Stow-on-the-Wold-Warwick-Oxford-London
Before leaving Stow-on-the-Wold, I tried some Welsh Gold (Honey) Organic Ice Cream which was highly recommended by both Jie and Hwa and indeed it was excellent, and not that much more expensive than normal ice cream (1 pound 25 pence).
I'd expressed my desire to visit Warwick Castle, but Jie didn't want to go there, both because she balked at the price, and it was owned by the Madame Tussauds group, and she doesn't want to visit any place they run. Naturally, Hwa had to follow her lead so in the end I went in alone.
2 PRC girls were going around taking photos of each other at the Castle, and when they started approaching me, I feared for the worst. Luckily however, when they asked me to help them take a photo, it was in halting English.
There were several interesting exhibits in the castle. Among them were a torture chamber with a rack, a stand with several Civil War helmets to try on, a box with 2 swords you could lift (but not remove from the box), a machine to test your longbow draw strength (and corresponding arrow range) which was unfortunately spoilt and a dungeon. The armoury had a fine collection of armour and arms, but unfortunately, most of it dated from the Civil War and later, leaning too far into the Gunpowder Age for my liking.
One of the more interesting parts of my visit was seeing the Castle Bowman (the link is to someone who was so impressed, he set up a fan club for him) in action, replete with full battle garb. He was both knowledgeable and irrepressible, not just shooting 18 arrows in a minute (albeit only 6 hit the target) and 2 at a time (though both flew way off the mark) but also talking about the weapons of English Bowmen (apparently a buckler is used to bash people's faces in and not for defence) and showing some artefacts from daily life. Later on my way out I met the Seneschal of the Castle, but I was in a rush, so I couldn't pull a fast one on him.
If I'd gone in high summer, I'd have caught even more colourful characters and watched some funky re-enactments (being managed by Madam Tussauds *does* have advantages). But then, it'd have been deadly hot, so.
There was an intriguing sounding "Ghost Tower" in the castle, but when I went there, I found that it was so dark I couldn't see anything and had to grope my way around. The music, lighting (mostly red) and voiceovers that were supposed to sound spooky but were just so soft I couldn't make out anything contributed to a Disney-fied feel.
Since the place was managed by Madame Tussauds, they took the opportunity to put liberal amounts of wax statues throughout the compound including "A Royal Weekend Party" (Daisy, Countess of Warwick's weekend party in 1898, at which the principle guest was the Prince of Wales, later Edward VII) and "The Kingmaker", touted as recreating "the mid fifteenth century world of Richard Neville, Earl of Warwick, Kingmaker". The latter reeked of the generic Ye Olde World smell (a la Jorvik) and had 2 people inside pretending to be artisans, but all in all, it was just a collection of wax statues around artefacts, with an annoying soundtrack played on loop in the background - a rather big disappointment.
In the Great Hall, flash photography was disallowed, which was good for conscientious visitors like me, but after observing people's behavior, I now understand (though still do not condone) why many places ban photography altogether (though the banning of camcorders is still unacceptable). Many people are either unwilling or unable to disable the flash on their cameras, and the stewards are too few in number and so unable to restrain them. To be fair to conscientious visitors perhaps, instead of banning photography wholesale, visitors should be made to sign for a photography permit, and pay a fine if they do not disable the flash.
Much of the Castle had a theme park feel, which was both good (more immersive, vivid, hands-on, entertaining) and bad (commodified feeling, not authentic, many attractions ended at the shop). I would've seen more, but had to run off to meet Hwa and Jie.
Not far from the Castle was St Mary's Church, where I took on the 160 steps up the narrow staircase of the Tower (Hwa having declined, once again, to join me) and got to the top with a case of vertigo. After I got down, I bought 3 cheap (5 pounds 99) medium quality CDs (Royal Philharmonic).
We then went to Oxford, where Jie and Hwa dropped me off, to return on my own later. It took me at least half an hour to find the Tourist Information Centre, thanks to many street signs which had not been updated since the Centre moved in October 2002 (hmmph). My sister asked me to try to bluff my way into Christchurch College by claiming that I was a potential student, but I'm bad at such things and so got fleeced of 4 pounds. At Christchurch Cathedral, I happened to talk to the steward while looking for a rare Becket window, and coincidentally, he did his "National Service" in Singapore 50 years ago at an airbase.
I wanted to go to Merton College later, but it was closed so I decided to go deer hunting at Magdalene, and walked in when the girl wasn't looking (so saving 3 pounds). The grounds were more pleasant than Christchurch, and they even had a river of sorts, with a boat moored at the side which I was tempted to hijack. After I'd finished ogling at deer, it was about 5:30 and my feet were hurting so I decided to take the Oxford Tube bus back to London, and was charged 7 pounds by the driver who thought I was a student. Somehow, I took 2 hours to reach London (damn traffic), and when I reached it, I found to my horror that Jie and Hwa were a long while from their home (as it turned out later, they had gone to Cambridge), so I had to sit in Burger King and read.
Day 10 - Hampton Court-Bombay Dreams-Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat
The next day, I took a squeaky and rickety train which kept swaying from side to side to Hampton Court. The oldest part of the palace, Henry VII's state apartments, had unfortunately been extensively renovated by William II and Mary II, but a substantial portion still remained. After seeing the King's and Queen's Apartments of William II and Queen Caroline respectively later, I decided that, not being especially fond of house interiors, especially 18th Century ones, I would skip the Gregorian Rooms, which were probably more of the same. I don't actually dislike Baroque and Rococo design and decor, unlike my sister, though too much gold gilt is bad for health, and it would have been nice to see more splendid tapestries and historical artifacts (or pieces of furniture, at least) in their original setting, but I was short of time.
The Tudor Kitchens were especially interesting because they had people in their "researching" Tudor methods of cooking. Outside the kitchens, there was a sign advising that people who might be upset with the methods and ingredients used should go elsewhere. Again, as with the sign in the Imperial War Museum North about disturbing images, this flummoxed me - why go to kitchens if you are alarmed by cooking?
I was in a hurry, but before I left I wanted to look at "The Triumphs of Caesar" by Andrea Mantegna. Frankly, I'd never heard of these paintings even though they are "considered to be one of the most important works of the Italian Renaissance", but they sounded interesting. Unfortunately, they were hidden in a godforsaken part of the Palace which had to be reached by a torturous circuitous route, and it took some effort to find them. The paintings were hardly an accurate depiction of Roman times - as for most Renaissance paintings, what Mantegna had done was to put Classical characters and events in a contemporary setting, so the Romans looked like they were characters from Renaissance Italy. There were -some- Roman elements, but they were submerged by the Renaissance elements, though with the low level of light in the gallery, it was hard to tell. I also wanted to look at The Wolsey Rooms and the Renaissance Picture Gallery, but unfortunately they were closed for air-con renovation.
I'm not one for gardens, but the gardens in Hampton Court were rather pretty. The "Great Vine", the oldest known vine in the world, was an interesting sight to behold. And then there was The Maze.
By the time I got to the Maze, there was already a horde of English schoolboys and schoolgirls inside, and from the noise you'd have thought a massacre was ensuing in there. Gritting my teeth and steeling myself, I went in to witness pandemonium, as schoolchildren (mostly the boys) were running around screaming (in ties and coats - they should get proper outing attire) and, from time to time, forming barricades to block others (mostly girls), all the while chanting, "we shall not, we shall not be moved". Meanwhile, the girls mostly walked around in groups chatting and giving the boys condescending looks. At one point, a group of schoolboys eyed me and started to form a barrier to block me, but I just grinned at them: they got the message and dispersed. It would've been fun to break through for good measure (even more fun than running around), but I might've been arrested for child abuse, so. Later, a co-ed group formed in front of me (I think they wanted to take me on) and started chanting the "we shall not be moved" chant, so I started filming them, and one shouted, "He's got a camera!!!".
It would've been great fun walking past the hordes of schoolchildren to find the centre, but I had a train to catch to watch Bombay Dreams and was afraid I couldn't find my way out in time. It'd be even more fun with friends - maybe I shall go back some day with other people. It was the most hilarious thing I'd seen all day (maybe all week, even). The experience was priceless and incapturable, but to catch a whiff of the moment, I took 2 videos.
Misc notes:
My knees, especially the left one, were hurting throughout the trip (and still now). Thank you SAF for injuring me for no bloody reason!
The English must eat Fish and Chips extremely often for the nation to be able to sustain so many Fish and Chips shops all throughout the country.
There was this packet of tropical fruit juice that we got which had 40 cals / litre. I smelt a rat, so I looked at the ingredients and lo and behold, it contained artificial sweetener. However, I still have my doubts - isn't there lots of natural sugar in the juice?
I bought a lot of rubbish in 2001 and almost nothing in 2002. This time it was something in between. Unfortunately for someone, I couldn't find anything chic because of my abyssal fashion sense and my not patronising some types of places.
Why do people like to have their gravestones put on the floors of cathedrals and abbeys? It's cheaper than having them on the wall but won't countless numbers tread on your remains, and isn't that humiliating in the extreme?
English school uniforms are much less restrictive than Singaporean ones. Instead of having to get their apparel from a designated school tailor, all they need to do is to get generic clothes that hew more or less to the prescribed dress code (eg white long sleeved shirt, half thigh length skirt [even for the lower secondary girls, most were in those]), and wear the school tie and coat. Also, it seems the plague of Hot Socks is universal. I saw only 1 schoolgirl (aged about 8 years old) wearing normal socks, but interestingly, also no schoolboys wearing Hot Socks (from what I could see under their pants).
My sister is obsessed with Blue Bear, and likes to draw an image of him, with the acronym "BB" in misted windows.
Hwa and Jie have a tendency to ask me the same questions over and over again, which is damn irritating (and picked up from my father, it seems).
YHA kitchen staff like to wear this hideous outfit consisting of black-and-white chequered pants, shirts and caps, making them look like jesters gone wrong.
Apparently, they used olive oil to oil armour in the 15th Century.
I want a tapestry. Except that it'd be too expensive.
Instead of trying to appeal to people's sense of patriotism (hogwash) and machismo, the Army ads in the UK are humourous.
During the 2 weeks, I got zapped by metal objects quite a few times. I think I'm becoming like my sister.
Oxford had so many people on bicycles, you'd think it was China. In fact, they even have priority boxes for bicycles to wait at traffic lights, in front of all other traffic.
I saw this billboard ad for SIA where the girl had her hair down. That's a first.
The fries at UK's Burger Kings are nicer than those here as they're more crunchy.
I should've bought the "Gay Times" for a certain homophobic friend, but he'd have killed me, so.
I kept standing left when on Tube escalators depite the rule of standing on the right. Guess it's been ingrained into me in Singapore, not least in Nanyang.
It seems all floors in the UK are creaky.
TO BE CONTINUED
Day 8 - Wales-Stow-on-the-Wold
Leaving Wales, we drove back into England, to Stokesay Castle, which was really a manor house - but a genuine medieval fortified manor house, no less.
After that we went to Hereford Cathedral, home of the Mappa Mundi, placed by some marketing genius at the end of a gallery containing the shop (where I bought a 'kimberly' keychain) and cafe to tempt visitors. The Mappa Mundi was remarkably well-preserved, considering that it was made in the 13th Century, and was much bigger than I thought it would be. In the Cathedral library, they also had a stunning collection of manuscripts from the 12th Century onward, all chained to the shelves.
Next we visited Gloucester Cathedral, where they had a good pamphlet offering a Harry Potter tour (since parts of both films were shot there, in the cloisters). In contrast, Alnwick, which was also used for filming, had nothing related to or about the filming except for some cardboard figures scattered throughout the castle. Among the artefacts scattered throughout the cathedral was a Norman Lead Font (c. 1140) - giving babies brain damage for 850 years!
Though the cathedral was grand, the toilets were horrible. They were smelly, one cubicle door could not close, the light in the one I chose was spoilt and when I pulled out some toilet paper, the cover of the container fell and hit my temple. And they had the cheek to ask for donations!
Outside the cathedral and a street away was what was probably the main street, and there were schoolchildren walking up and down, including 2 schoolgirls with skirts covering only 1/2 - 1/3 of their thighs, without stockings. Now, if even *I* was cold and my legs numbing, I wonder how they stood it.
For the night we stopped at Stow-on-the-Wold, near Stratford-Upon-Avon.
Day 9 - Stow-on-the-Wold-Warwick-Oxford-London
Before leaving Stow-on-the-Wold, I tried some Welsh Gold (Honey) Organic Ice Cream which was highly recommended by both Jie and Hwa and indeed it was excellent, and not that much more expensive than normal ice cream (1 pound 25 pence).
I'd expressed my desire to visit Warwick Castle, but Jie didn't want to go there, both because she balked at the price, and it was owned by the Madame Tussauds group, and she doesn't want to visit any place they run. Naturally, Hwa had to follow her lead so in the end I went in alone.
2 PRC girls were going around taking photos of each other at the Castle, and when they started approaching me, I feared for the worst. Luckily however, when they asked me to help them take a photo, it was in halting English.
There were several interesting exhibits in the castle. Among them were a torture chamber with a rack, a stand with several Civil War helmets to try on, a box with 2 swords you could lift (but not remove from the box), a machine to test your longbow draw strength (and corresponding arrow range) which was unfortunately spoilt and a dungeon. The armoury had a fine collection of armour and arms, but unfortunately, most of it dated from the Civil War and later, leaning too far into the Gunpowder Age for my liking.
One of the more interesting parts of my visit was seeing the Castle Bowman (the link is to someone who was so impressed, he set up a fan club for him) in action, replete with full battle garb. He was both knowledgeable and irrepressible, not just shooting 18 arrows in a minute (albeit only 6 hit the target) and 2 at a time (though both flew way off the mark) but also talking about the weapons of English Bowmen (apparently a buckler is used to bash people's faces in and not for defence) and showing some artefacts from daily life. Later on my way out I met the Seneschal of the Castle, but I was in a rush, so I couldn't pull a fast one on him.
If I'd gone in high summer, I'd have caught even more colourful characters and watched some funky re-enactments (being managed by Madam Tussauds *does* have advantages). But then, it'd have been deadly hot, so.
There was an intriguing sounding "Ghost Tower" in the castle, but when I went there, I found that it was so dark I couldn't see anything and had to grope my way around. The music, lighting (mostly red) and voiceovers that were supposed to sound spooky but were just so soft I couldn't make out anything contributed to a Disney-fied feel.
Since the place was managed by Madame Tussauds, they took the opportunity to put liberal amounts of wax statues throughout the compound including "A Royal Weekend Party" (Daisy, Countess of Warwick's weekend party in 1898, at which the principle guest was the Prince of Wales, later Edward VII) and "The Kingmaker", touted as recreating "the mid fifteenth century world of Richard Neville, Earl of Warwick, Kingmaker". The latter reeked of the generic Ye Olde World smell (a la Jorvik) and had 2 people inside pretending to be artisans, but all in all, it was just a collection of wax statues around artefacts, with an annoying soundtrack played on loop in the background - a rather big disappointment.
In the Great Hall, flash photography was disallowed, which was good for conscientious visitors like me, but after observing people's behavior, I now understand (though still do not condone) why many places ban photography altogether (though the banning of camcorders is still unacceptable). Many people are either unwilling or unable to disable the flash on their cameras, and the stewards are too few in number and so unable to restrain them. To be fair to conscientious visitors perhaps, instead of banning photography wholesale, visitors should be made to sign for a photography permit, and pay a fine if they do not disable the flash.
Much of the Castle had a theme park feel, which was both good (more immersive, vivid, hands-on, entertaining) and bad (commodified feeling, not authentic, many attractions ended at the shop). I would've seen more, but had to run off to meet Hwa and Jie.
Not far from the Castle was St Mary's Church, where I took on the 160 steps up the narrow staircase of the Tower (Hwa having declined, once again, to join me) and got to the top with a case of vertigo. After I got down, I bought 3 cheap (5 pounds 99) medium quality CDs (Royal Philharmonic).
We then went to Oxford, where Jie and Hwa dropped me off, to return on my own later. It took me at least half an hour to find the Tourist Information Centre, thanks to many street signs which had not been updated since the Centre moved in October 2002 (hmmph). My sister asked me to try to bluff my way into Christchurch College by claiming that I was a potential student, but I'm bad at such things and so got fleeced of 4 pounds. At Christchurch Cathedral, I happened to talk to the steward while looking for a rare Becket window, and coincidentally, he did his "National Service" in Singapore 50 years ago at an airbase.
I wanted to go to Merton College later, but it was closed so I decided to go deer hunting at Magdalene, and walked in when the girl wasn't looking (so saving 3 pounds). The grounds were more pleasant than Christchurch, and they even had a river of sorts, with a boat moored at the side which I was tempted to hijack. After I'd finished ogling at deer, it was about 5:30 and my feet were hurting so I decided to take the Oxford Tube bus back to London, and was charged 7 pounds by the driver who thought I was a student. Somehow, I took 2 hours to reach London (damn traffic), and when I reached it, I found to my horror that Jie and Hwa were a long while from their home (as it turned out later, they had gone to Cambridge), so I had to sit in Burger King and read.
Day 10 - Hampton Court-Bombay Dreams-Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat
The next day, I took a squeaky and rickety train which kept swaying from side to side to Hampton Court. The oldest part of the palace, Henry VII's state apartments, had unfortunately been extensively renovated by William II and Mary II, but a substantial portion still remained. After seeing the King's and Queen's Apartments of William II and Queen Caroline respectively later, I decided that, not being especially fond of house interiors, especially 18th Century ones, I would skip the Gregorian Rooms, which were probably more of the same. I don't actually dislike Baroque and Rococo design and decor, unlike my sister, though too much gold gilt is bad for health, and it would have been nice to see more splendid tapestries and historical artifacts (or pieces of furniture, at least) in their original setting, but I was short of time.
The Tudor Kitchens were especially interesting because they had people in their "researching" Tudor methods of cooking. Outside the kitchens, there was a sign advising that people who might be upset with the methods and ingredients used should go elsewhere. Again, as with the sign in the Imperial War Museum North about disturbing images, this flummoxed me - why go to kitchens if you are alarmed by cooking?
I was in a hurry, but before I left I wanted to look at "The Triumphs of Caesar" by Andrea Mantegna. Frankly, I'd never heard of these paintings even though they are "considered to be one of the most important works of the Italian Renaissance", but they sounded interesting. Unfortunately, they were hidden in a godforsaken part of the Palace which had to be reached by a torturous circuitous route, and it took some effort to find them. The paintings were hardly an accurate depiction of Roman times - as for most Renaissance paintings, what Mantegna had done was to put Classical characters and events in a contemporary setting, so the Romans looked like they were characters from Renaissance Italy. There were -some- Roman elements, but they were submerged by the Renaissance elements, though with the low level of light in the gallery, it was hard to tell. I also wanted to look at The Wolsey Rooms and the Renaissance Picture Gallery, but unfortunately they were closed for air-con renovation.
I'm not one for gardens, but the gardens in Hampton Court were rather pretty. The "Great Vine", the oldest known vine in the world, was an interesting sight to behold. And then there was The Maze.
By the time I got to the Maze, there was already a horde of English schoolboys and schoolgirls inside, and from the noise you'd have thought a massacre was ensuing in there. Gritting my teeth and steeling myself, I went in to witness pandemonium, as schoolchildren (mostly the boys) were running around screaming (in ties and coats - they should get proper outing attire) and, from time to time, forming barricades to block others (mostly girls), all the while chanting, "we shall not, we shall not be moved". Meanwhile, the girls mostly walked around in groups chatting and giving the boys condescending looks. At one point, a group of schoolboys eyed me and started to form a barrier to block me, but I just grinned at them: they got the message and dispersed. It would've been fun to break through for good measure (even more fun than running around), but I might've been arrested for child abuse, so. Later, a co-ed group formed in front of me (I think they wanted to take me on) and started chanting the "we shall not be moved" chant, so I started filming them, and one shouted, "He's got a camera!!!".
It would've been great fun walking past the hordes of schoolchildren to find the centre, but I had a train to catch to watch Bombay Dreams and was afraid I couldn't find my way out in time. It'd be even more fun with friends - maybe I shall go back some day with other people. It was the most hilarious thing I'd seen all day (maybe all week, even). The experience was priceless and incapturable, but to catch a whiff of the moment, I took 2 videos.
Misc notes:
My knees, especially the left one, were hurting throughout the trip (and still now). Thank you SAF for injuring me for no bloody reason!
The English must eat Fish and Chips extremely often for the nation to be able to sustain so many Fish and Chips shops all throughout the country.
There was this packet of tropical fruit juice that we got which had 40 cals / litre. I smelt a rat, so I looked at the ingredients and lo and behold, it contained artificial sweetener. However, I still have my doubts - isn't there lots of natural sugar in the juice?
I bought a lot of rubbish in 2001 and almost nothing in 2002. This time it was something in between. Unfortunately for someone, I couldn't find anything chic because of my abyssal fashion sense and my not patronising some types of places.
Why do people like to have their gravestones put on the floors of cathedrals and abbeys? It's cheaper than having them on the wall but won't countless numbers tread on your remains, and isn't that humiliating in the extreme?
English school uniforms are much less restrictive than Singaporean ones. Instead of having to get their apparel from a designated school tailor, all they need to do is to get generic clothes that hew more or less to the prescribed dress code (eg white long sleeved shirt, half thigh length skirt [even for the lower secondary girls, most were in those]), and wear the school tie and coat. Also, it seems the plague of Hot Socks is universal. I saw only 1 schoolgirl (aged about 8 years old) wearing normal socks, but interestingly, also no schoolboys wearing Hot Socks (from what I could see under their pants).
My sister is obsessed with Blue Bear, and likes to draw an image of him, with the acronym "BB" in misted windows.
Hwa and Jie have a tendency to ask me the same questions over and over again, which is damn irritating (and picked up from my father, it seems).
YHA kitchen staff like to wear this hideous outfit consisting of black-and-white chequered pants, shirts and caps, making them look like jesters gone wrong.
Apparently, they used olive oil to oil armour in the 15th Century.
I want a tapestry. Except that it'd be too expensive.
Instead of trying to appeal to people's sense of patriotism (hogwash) and machismo, the Army ads in the UK are humourous.
During the 2 weeks, I got zapped by metal objects quite a few times. I think I'm becoming like my sister.
Oxford had so many people on bicycles, you'd think it was China. In fact, they even have priority boxes for bicycles to wait at traffic lights, in front of all other traffic.
I saw this billboard ad for SIA where the girl had her hair down. That's a first.
The fries at UK's Burger Kings are nicer than those here as they're more crunchy.
I should've bought the "Gay Times" for a certain homophobic friend, but he'd have killed me, so.
I kept standing left when on Tube escalators depite the rule of standing on the right. Guess it's been ingrained into me in Singapore, not least in Nanyang.
It seems all floors in the UK are creaky.
TO BE CONTINUED
Post ID: 106580793686002001
Sunday, October 05, 2003
Fools and Their Freedoms Are Soon Parted
One of the best-running comedies in Washington these days comes from the show the Republicans are forced to put on defending the various screw ups of George W. Bush and his increasingly error-prone administration.
Gross groupies gather to gab about gal-groping
Shigeru Oohori (a pseudonym) is a 35-year-old "elite salaryman" at a major corporation and loving father of a 10-year-old daughter. He's also a dedicated chikan (groper) who gets his thrills running his hands over the bodies of young women on commuter trains.
According to Oohori, there are two types of chikan. One is the "orthodox" type, who become excited by seeing the expression of disgust on a girl's face at the moment they begin running their hands over her body. The other type, the "technician," aims at subtly titillating the woman using practiced erotic techniques that succeed in getting her wet before she even realizes what's happening.
Members of Oohori's group become eligible for hands-on training sessions, aboard actual commuter trains.
"We all pool our money and employ several girls who let us grope them while actually on the train,"
Dolphin Stress Test
"Being born and having grown up in Singapore does not automatically entitle a person to Singapore citizenship."
LEE BOON HWEE, Head, Corporate Communications Branch, for Commissioner Immigration and Checkpoints Authority in the ST Forum 4 Oct 2003
******
Singapore's hopes for gold in the SEA Games were given a boost on Tuesday after Chinese shot putters Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were granted Singapore citizenship.
- The Star Online - 1 Oct 2003
_______________________________________
Reasons why Barnabas is not a citizen
I REFER to Mr Barnabas Lim Ah Huat's letter, 'Born and bred here but he is 'Stateless' ' (ST, Sept 27), and the letters by Ms Lydia Rahman and Mr Michael Loh Yik Ming ('Do the right thing by Barnabas' and 'Issue is one of legitimacy, not citizenship'; ST, Oct 1).
We would like to clarify why Mr Lim was not conferred Singapore citizenship at birth. He could not take on his father's Singapore citizenship because, as Mr Lim had noted, his parents were not legally married at the time of his birth.
He also could not be conferred Singapore citizenship through his mother as she was not a Singapore citizen then. These are provided for in the Singapore Constitution.
Mr Lim was called up for national service because he was granted Singapore permanent residency when he was 12 years old.
Every citizenship application is assessed carefully on its own merits.
The factors taken into consideration include the extent of family roots in Singapore, the legality of the parents' marriage at the time of birth, national service performance, the good-conduct records of the applicant and the sponsor, and other compassionate factors.
When Mr Lim applied again for Singapore citizenship last year, our officers explained to him why his past citizenship applications had not been successful. Being born and having grown up in Singapore does not automatically entitle a person to Singapore citizenship.
If Mr Lim needs further clarification, he may wish to contact us on 6391-6186.
LEE BOON HWEE
Head,
Corporate Communications Branch
for Commissioner Immigration and Checkpoints Authority
____________________________________
Wednesday October 1, 2003
Chinese shot putters for Singapore
SINGAPORE: Singapore's hopes for gold in the SEA Games were given a boost on Tuesday after Chinese shot putters Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were granted Singapore citizenship.
The two women, ranked among the best in Asia for the event, can now represent the city-state in the biennial 10-nation games held in Vietnam in December, the Singapore Amateur Athletics Association (SAAA) said in a statement.
Du's personal best of 18.67m and Zhang's 18.34m compare favourably with the top three athletes in last year's Asian Games in Busan, South Korea.
The pair also dominated this year's 2003 Asian GP circuit, and having surpassed the 2004 Olympic Games B qualifying standard of 17.20m set by the IAAF, they are eligible to represent Singapore in next year's Olympics in Athens. – AFP
This is ridiculous.
"OCT 4, 2003
Think you know what a condom's for? Think again
I REFER to Madam Cindy Tan Hui Cheng's letter, 'Why a condom?' (ST, Oct 1).
One of the most vital requirements for a jungle survival kit is something to help the soldier collect water. The condom in the kit is meant for this purpose.
It is hygienically packaged and more compact than a folded plastic bag, and it can hold a reasonable amount of water.
The condom can also be used to keep the other essential survival items such as matches and medical items dry after they have been opened.
COLONEL BERNARD TOH
Director,
Public Affairs
Ministry of Defence"
One of the best-running comedies in Washington these days comes from the show the Republicans are forced to put on defending the various screw ups of George W. Bush and his increasingly error-prone administration.
Gross groupies gather to gab about gal-groping
Shigeru Oohori (a pseudonym) is a 35-year-old "elite salaryman" at a major corporation and loving father of a 10-year-old daughter. He's also a dedicated chikan (groper) who gets his thrills running his hands over the bodies of young women on commuter trains.
According to Oohori, there are two types of chikan. One is the "orthodox" type, who become excited by seeing the expression of disgust on a girl's face at the moment they begin running their hands over her body. The other type, the "technician," aims at subtly titillating the woman using practiced erotic techniques that succeed in getting her wet before she even realizes what's happening.
Members of Oohori's group become eligible for hands-on training sessions, aboard actual commuter trains.
"We all pool our money and employ several girls who let us grope them while actually on the train,"
Dolphin Stress Test
"Being born and having grown up in Singapore does not automatically entitle a person to Singapore citizenship."
LEE BOON HWEE, Head, Corporate Communications Branch, for Commissioner Immigration and Checkpoints Authority in the ST Forum 4 Oct 2003
******
Singapore's hopes for gold in the SEA Games were given a boost on Tuesday after Chinese shot putters Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were granted Singapore citizenship.
- The Star Online - 1 Oct 2003
_______________________________________
Reasons why Barnabas is not a citizen
I REFER to Mr Barnabas Lim Ah Huat's letter, 'Born and bred here but he is 'Stateless' ' (ST, Sept 27), and the letters by Ms Lydia Rahman and Mr Michael Loh Yik Ming ('Do the right thing by Barnabas' and 'Issue is one of legitimacy, not citizenship'; ST, Oct 1).
We would like to clarify why Mr Lim was not conferred Singapore citizenship at birth. He could not take on his father's Singapore citizenship because, as Mr Lim had noted, his parents were not legally married at the time of his birth.
He also could not be conferred Singapore citizenship through his mother as she was not a Singapore citizen then. These are provided for in the Singapore Constitution.
Mr Lim was called up for national service because he was granted Singapore permanent residency when he was 12 years old.
Every citizenship application is assessed carefully on its own merits.
The factors taken into consideration include the extent of family roots in Singapore, the legality of the parents' marriage at the time of birth, national service performance, the good-conduct records of the applicant and the sponsor, and other compassionate factors.
When Mr Lim applied again for Singapore citizenship last year, our officers explained to him why his past citizenship applications had not been successful. Being born and having grown up in Singapore does not automatically entitle a person to Singapore citizenship.
If Mr Lim needs further clarification, he may wish to contact us on 6391-6186.
LEE BOON HWEE
Head,
Corporate Communications Branch
for Commissioner Immigration and Checkpoints Authority
____________________________________
Wednesday October 1, 2003
Chinese shot putters for Singapore
SINGAPORE: Singapore's hopes for gold in the SEA Games were given a boost on Tuesday after Chinese shot putters Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were granted Singapore citizenship.
The two women, ranked among the best in Asia for the event, can now represent the city-state in the biennial 10-nation games held in Vietnam in December, the Singapore Amateur Athletics Association (SAAA) said in a statement.
Du's personal best of 18.67m and Zhang's 18.34m compare favourably with the top three athletes in last year's Asian Games in Busan, South Korea.
The pair also dominated this year's 2003 Asian GP circuit, and having surpassed the 2004 Olympic Games B qualifying standard of 17.20m set by the IAAF, they are eligible to represent Singapore in next year's Olympics in Athens. – AFP
This is ridiculous.
"OCT 4, 2003
Think you know what a condom's for? Think again
I REFER to Madam Cindy Tan Hui Cheng's letter, 'Why a condom?' (ST, Oct 1).
One of the most vital requirements for a jungle survival kit is something to help the soldier collect water. The condom in the kit is meant for this purpose.
It is hygienically packaged and more compact than a folded plastic bag, and it can hold a reasonable amount of water.
The condom can also be used to keep the other essential survival items such as matches and medical items dry after they have been opened.
COLONEL BERNARD TOH
Director,
Public Affairs
Ministry of Defence"
Post ID: 106529516483262902
My Grand Tour of England and Wales - Part 3 of X
Day 6 - Lake District-Manchester-Imperial War Museum-Wales
Leaving the Lake District early, we drove down to Manchester, where Jie and Hwa took the Manchester United Old Trafford stadium tour. Not being interested in football, I trekked down to the Imperial War Museum North (newly opened in July 2002) which, though only including artefacts and exhibits from the Boer War onwards, was nonetheless interesting and informative.
The building was vast but had an empty feeling as there was much white space about not filled with exhibits. The reason for this was revealed later during 'The Big Picture', a light and sound show where images were projected on the many walls and empty spaces of the building. Visitors were warned that "The Big Picture" was something "some visitors may find distressing". If so, wth did they visit a WAR Museum? The Big Picture itself was chaotic and disorganised - perfectly in tune with modern sensibilities. One could say that this was to convey the chaos of war, but it was just annoying.
Interesting artefacts:
- A Harrier
- A Russian T-34 Tank
- A handbill recording the escape of the Transvaal President Paul Kreuger to Portugese East Africa which read:
"THE TRANSVAAL
TWO GUINEAS REWARD
Will be paid by any of our 'Gentlemen in Khaki'
to any person giving information that will lead
to the apprehension of
EX PRESIDENT
KRUGER
who on or about 21 May 1900
DESERTED
HIS LOVING WIFE AND FAMILY
and absconded with all the available money in the Transvaal, and left his wife and family on the parish relief of Lord Roberts and his army. Was last seen making another foolish speech from a cattle truck on his way to Machadodorp.
DESCRIPTION: Height about 5ft 6in: age 73 (or in his second childhood). Would be easily recognized by his lunacy actions. Iron grey hair, turned white since the relief of Ladysmith. Was last seen wearing a very shabby frock coat suit, a very old silk hat (one of the first that was made and was found after the flood) and always smoking a big badger's pipe. No underclothing, Union Jack socks and brown boots.
The above reward will be paid by any right-minded Englishman.
June 1900 By Order
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN"
- a bell from the Lusitania
- Argentine magazines from the time of the Falklands War which depicted Margaret Thatcher as the Devil and Hitler
- A little Red Book (I never knew it was so little)
- an Anti-War poster: "Fuck W*r [Footnote: US govt regulations prohibit the printing of obscene words]"
There was an interesting section on National Service. Apparently that deceptive euphemism came from the UK, where it was in effect from 1947 to 1963. Odd that Singapore implemented it, and stole the euphemism, after the enlightened British realised it should be abolished. At the same exhibit was an inspiring story: "William Harrison was a pacifist. His conscience told him killing was wrong. He joined the No Conscription Fellowship which was opposed to compulsory recruitment. In 1916 he refused to be called up and was arrested in March 1917. He was court-martialled in North Shields and sentenced to hard labour in Wormwood Socks and Newcastle prisons. He was finally released in April 1919."
[Additional material from elsewhere: Clifford Allen was the founder of the No-Conscription Fellowship. He was conscripted in 1916 but when he refused to serve he was sent to prison. While in prison Allen developed tuberculosis of the spine. Allen made the following statement at his Military Tribunal in 1916.
"We are all young men, and life is a precious thing to such men. We cherish life because of the opportunities for adventure and achievement which it offers to a man who is young. They say our country is in danger. Of course it is, but whose fault is that? It will be in danger in fifty years time, if our rulers know they can always win our support by hoisting danger signals. They will never heed our condemnation of their foreign policy if they can always depend upon our support in time of war. There is one interference with individual judgement that no state in the world has any sanction to enforce - that is, to tamper with the unfettered free right of everyman to decide for himself the issue of life and death."]
They also had an interesting item on propaganda - in the UK, a Ministry of Information was set up to co-ordinate UK propaganda (what about our Ministry of Information -and the Arts- then?), and the full name of the Nazi Ministry of Propaganda (one thing about fascist governments - at least they were honest about it) was the Ministry of Propaganda and Public Enlightenment. There was also some grotesque TV footage from the Vietnam War. At the part about World War II, they debunked the widely propagated myth that Britain fought alone after France had fallen to Hitler, as it had its Commonwealth. And then to display the effects of rationing and other post-war restrictions, they had a grotesque home-made teddy bear.
As I was walking back from the museum to join Jie and Hwa, I discovered that my sister had made a call to Singapore the night before without telling me. She *had* asked me if I could use my phone, but she had refused to tell me who she was calling, so I was extremely annoyed due to the sheer waste involved (using M1's SmartRoam, one can save a substantial amount compared to making calls the normal way), all because of her pathological secrecy, inherited from and decried in my parents.
Our next stop was Lyme Park, used for filming in the BBC's production of Pride and Prejudice. I really don't understand the British obsession with houses and gardens. They're nice enough, but I don't know how they can stand seeing so many of them.
Then we crossed into Wales, where suddenly all the road signs became bilingual (with English placed below Welsh, confirming the latter's status as the region's principal language), the number of hospitals with signs pointing to them skyrocketed (maybe Wales is a dangerous or sickly country) and every other place and person's name started with "LL".
Contrary to what their names might imply, the Youth Hostels didn't have many youths staying in them - we most often saw old people and families with young children. The only one where there were a lot of youths was Conwy, our stop for our first night in Wales, because the St Helens Youth Brass Band (National Champions 1997-2003) was there for their retreat. Of course, this had its disadvantages - I was sitting beside the pay phone waiting for Jie and Hwa to finish watching TV and the phone kept ringing, only for the line to be cut off when I answered it (since the number of the payphone was pasted there for all to see), and looking up the stairwell, I often saw faces peering down at me briefly. Also, they made a lot of noise and were hyperactive, but I was generally okay with it, especially seeing as I would've done the same if I were with a group of friends. Hwa told me that there was one guy using the Internet terminal (provided by the same cartel) who kept putting in money while cursing loudly all the way, "this computer sucks!" and banging the table.
Day 7 - Castle Sighting in Wales
The next day, we went castle sighting. Now, Wales is home to no less than 4 Castles (Conwy, Caernarfon, Harlech and Beaumaris)which have been designated World Heritage Sites under the collective label of "Castles and Town Walls of King Edward in Gwynedd", and that really makes you wonder. First, we looked at the one in the town we spent the night in - Conwy Castle. Unfortunately, it was too early in the day so it wasn't open. After that, me and Hwa walked along part of the top of Conwy's town walls - preserved in excellent condition, yet not restored so much that you know it's restored (ala York). We then drove to Beaumaris, home of Beaumaris Castle - the "most technically perfect medieval castle" - except that it was never completed. The inner curtain walls being higher than the outer ones, thus allowing 2 fields of fire and fire from the inner ones when the outer ones were overrun, were a nice feature. But I wonder what use half a moat was.
Later, we moved on to Caernarfon. The toilet there was too high tech for me - instead of a normal sink, there was a metal hole in the wall. So I stuck my hand in, hoping to get some water to wash my calf, and wondered why so little water came out, and why it was so cold. It was soap. By the time I made this shocking discovery, the water had been flowing for a while, so I had to get more water to wash off the soap. So I stuck my hand in briefly and withdrew it as quickly as possible, but the nozzle was so well positioned that some soap still got onto my hand.
In the Eagle Tower, there was a theatrette screening a video that gave an overview of Wales' history, and of the castles of Edward I. It was good, except for this annoying chap who kept popping up in various garb, presumably to give the video a more personalised touch. Later, I climbed to the top of one of the turrets in the Eagle Tower (the highest point in the castle, I think) and ended up winded. All in all, I really liked Caernarfon (though my all-time favourite is still Krak des Chevaliers, the enduring image of which will always bring a tear to my eye) - it had a good exhibition, was well restored without giving the feeling of reconstruction (I like reconstruction too, but each has its place). Too bad I couldn't take a delicious aerial shot to encompass the totality of the castle.
We then drove through the expanses of Snowdonia. The sheer slopes of the mountains of slate, their tops shrouded in clouds, the rocky crags and outcrops sheathed in heather and sparse scrub or the plunging, verdant valleys - the general grandeur of it all was most impressive. Best of all, it wasn't raining like in the Lake District, so I actually preferred it to there. But again, as with the Lake District, there were no laybys for much of the way so we couldn't stop and take photos at some of the spots with the more spectacular views. Worse, at one point, when I was sitting on a rock in the middle of a river with Hwa, who had expended much more effort, with a great deal more fuss than me in getting there, posing for a shot to be taken by Jie, she couldn't figure out how to take a shot (women!) and by the time I went back to adjust the settings, my camera was low on batteries only 4 days after the last full charge. Amazingly, my backup batteries chose that moment to go flat too, and jiggling with 2 of Hwa's spare batteries to replace 2 of my 4 expended ones did not work, and I hadn't figured out that I could still take pictures by turning off the LCD. So that shot of us in the river was only taken with Hwa's 2 1/2 year old digital camera, with less than spectacular results.
As we drove through Snowdonia, we noticed not a few people had parked by the road and gone hiking in the mountains. Ugh. Apparently mountain hiking is really popular in those parts, as at one point there was even a spot with a car park, a cafe and - get this - a youth hostel (which I bought 4 AA batteries from at the princely price of 4 pounds 99 pence, which even scarier was not far from their price in more civilised areas - I think I could get rich smuggling film and batteries into Europe from Hong Kong).
At one part of Snowdonia, near a rather large town, we found what appeared to be the cheapest petrol in Britain - 70.9 pence/litre. On closer inspection, we found this to be a charade - the petrol kiosk had long since closed, but there was still a Little Chef there. I bet the price was deliberately set at that rate by Little Chef, so drivers would be conned into stopping and eating after they found out petrol wasn't actually being sold!
Our Youth Hostel for the night was Llangollen. There they sold "glowsticks, necklaces and bracelets - useful in an emergency, ideal for clubbing!", had an amusing poster on how to and not to use the shroud, and had internet access provided by another company, which was cheaper, faster and better. Oddly though, the door to our room could only be locked from outside, and not from inside. There was also an irritating pussy which kept brushing against my leg in a vain attempt to get me to feed it.
Misc notes:
Throughout the 2 weeks, Jie and Hwa kept claiming I was chopping consonants off the ends of my words. Partly this is because they are very niao, but I suppose my tongue has become lazy in Singapore, especially during my slavery. Incidentally though, even at my most pedantic, I never corrected people many times a day.
My camera seems to deliver overly-bright images.
The UK must be the only country in the world without Oreo McFlurrys. More's the pity.
There's something about these suspicious Youth Hostel descriptions. York, for exampled, was described as a "soothing stroll" from the City Centre, but we found it to be at least 40 mins walk from there. Many places were described as "ideal bases" to explore certain locations or attractions, but were extremely far from them. And there was deceptive advertising - the picture for Wooler showed a cyclist resting on the ground, with his bike thrown willy-nilly, looking out at the island of Lindisfarne. In the end, it was like half an hour by car from Wooler to Lindisfarne. I guess he was so upset at being tricked by the description that he threw the bike down in frustration and rage.
One of the girls in the St Helens Youth Band had this funky hairband with 2 devil's horns on them.
Hwa and Jie confess they are deprived - they get excited whenever they see a superstore.
I have serious doubts about the power of symbolism. The Eagle Tower in Caernarfon Castle is named such because it has sculpted eagles on top of it, and Edward I supposedly included this to gain the respect of the Welsh, who still remembered the Romans, if not fondly, then with respect. I think that the influence, strength and memory of the "collective consciousness" is very much overrated (Edward constructed his castles a century after the Romans left Britain).
In the 8 days, I kept seeing signs warning of speed cameras, but rarely saw one. I bet it's just a ploy to get motorists to slow down on the cheap.
Youth hostels should allow the truly destitute the sleep on the couch in the lounge for half the price.
The National Trust is really paranoid by not allowing indoor photography. Luckily, that doesn't affect me that much as I'm not that fond of houses.
TO BE CONTINUED
Day 6 - Lake District-Manchester-Imperial War Museum-Wales
Leaving the Lake District early, we drove down to Manchester, where Jie and Hwa took the Manchester United Old Trafford stadium tour. Not being interested in football, I trekked down to the Imperial War Museum North (newly opened in July 2002) which, though only including artefacts and exhibits from the Boer War onwards, was nonetheless interesting and informative.
The building was vast but had an empty feeling as there was much white space about not filled with exhibits. The reason for this was revealed later during 'The Big Picture', a light and sound show where images were projected on the many walls and empty spaces of the building. Visitors were warned that "The Big Picture" was something "some visitors may find distressing". If so, wth did they visit a WAR Museum? The Big Picture itself was chaotic and disorganised - perfectly in tune with modern sensibilities. One could say that this was to convey the chaos of war, but it was just annoying.
Interesting artefacts:
- A Harrier
- A Russian T-34 Tank
- A handbill recording the escape of the Transvaal President Paul Kreuger to Portugese East Africa which read:
"THE TRANSVAAL
TWO GUINEAS REWARD
Will be paid by any of our 'Gentlemen in Khaki'
to any person giving information that will lead
to the apprehension of
EX PRESIDENT
KRUGER
who on or about 21 May 1900
DESERTED
HIS LOVING WIFE AND FAMILY
and absconded with all the available money in the Transvaal, and left his wife and family on the parish relief of Lord Roberts and his army. Was last seen making another foolish speech from a cattle truck on his way to Machadodorp.
DESCRIPTION: Height about 5ft 6in: age 73 (or in his second childhood). Would be easily recognized by his lunacy actions. Iron grey hair, turned white since the relief of Ladysmith. Was last seen wearing a very shabby frock coat suit, a very old silk hat (one of the first that was made and was found after the flood) and always smoking a big badger's pipe. No underclothing, Union Jack socks and brown boots.
The above reward will be paid by any right-minded Englishman.
June 1900 By Order
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN"
- a bell from the Lusitania
- Argentine magazines from the time of the Falklands War which depicted Margaret Thatcher as the Devil and Hitler
- A little Red Book (I never knew it was so little)
- an Anti-War poster: "Fuck W*r [Footnote: US govt regulations prohibit the printing of obscene words]"
There was an interesting section on National Service. Apparently that deceptive euphemism came from the UK, where it was in effect from 1947 to 1963. Odd that Singapore implemented it, and stole the euphemism, after the enlightened British realised it should be abolished. At the same exhibit was an inspiring story: "William Harrison was a pacifist. His conscience told him killing was wrong. He joined the No Conscription Fellowship which was opposed to compulsory recruitment. In 1916 he refused to be called up and was arrested in March 1917. He was court-martialled in North Shields and sentenced to hard labour in Wormwood Socks and Newcastle prisons. He was finally released in April 1919."
[Additional material from elsewhere: Clifford Allen was the founder of the No-Conscription Fellowship. He was conscripted in 1916 but when he refused to serve he was sent to prison. While in prison Allen developed tuberculosis of the spine. Allen made the following statement at his Military Tribunal in 1916.
"We are all young men, and life is a precious thing to such men. We cherish life because of the opportunities for adventure and achievement which it offers to a man who is young. They say our country is in danger. Of course it is, but whose fault is that? It will be in danger in fifty years time, if our rulers know they can always win our support by hoisting danger signals. They will never heed our condemnation of their foreign policy if they can always depend upon our support in time of war. There is one interference with individual judgement that no state in the world has any sanction to enforce - that is, to tamper with the unfettered free right of everyman to decide for himself the issue of life and death."]
They also had an interesting item on propaganda - in the UK, a Ministry of Information was set up to co-ordinate UK propaganda (what about our Ministry of Information -and the Arts- then?), and the full name of the Nazi Ministry of Propaganda (one thing about fascist governments - at least they were honest about it) was the Ministry of Propaganda and Public Enlightenment. There was also some grotesque TV footage from the Vietnam War. At the part about World War II, they debunked the widely propagated myth that Britain fought alone after France had fallen to Hitler, as it had its Commonwealth. And then to display the effects of rationing and other post-war restrictions, they had a grotesque home-made teddy bear.
As I was walking back from the museum to join Jie and Hwa, I discovered that my sister had made a call to Singapore the night before without telling me. She *had* asked me if I could use my phone, but she had refused to tell me who she was calling, so I was extremely annoyed due to the sheer waste involved (using M1's SmartRoam, one can save a substantial amount compared to making calls the normal way), all because of her pathological secrecy, inherited from and decried in my parents.
Our next stop was Lyme Park, used for filming in the BBC's production of Pride and Prejudice. I really don't understand the British obsession with houses and gardens. They're nice enough, but I don't know how they can stand seeing so many of them.
Then we crossed into Wales, where suddenly all the road signs became bilingual (with English placed below Welsh, confirming the latter's status as the region's principal language), the number of hospitals with signs pointing to them skyrocketed (maybe Wales is a dangerous or sickly country) and every other place and person's name started with "LL".
Contrary to what their names might imply, the Youth Hostels didn't have many youths staying in them - we most often saw old people and families with young children. The only one where there were a lot of youths was Conwy, our stop for our first night in Wales, because the St Helens Youth Brass Band (National Champions 1997-2003) was there for their retreat. Of course, this had its disadvantages - I was sitting beside the pay phone waiting for Jie and Hwa to finish watching TV and the phone kept ringing, only for the line to be cut off when I answered it (since the number of the payphone was pasted there for all to see), and looking up the stairwell, I often saw faces peering down at me briefly. Also, they made a lot of noise and were hyperactive, but I was generally okay with it, especially seeing as I would've done the same if I were with a group of friends. Hwa told me that there was one guy using the Internet terminal (provided by the same cartel) who kept putting in money while cursing loudly all the way, "this computer sucks!" and banging the table.
Day 7 - Castle Sighting in Wales
The next day, we went castle sighting. Now, Wales is home to no less than 4 Castles (Conwy, Caernarfon, Harlech and Beaumaris)which have been designated World Heritage Sites under the collective label of "Castles and Town Walls of King Edward in Gwynedd", and that really makes you wonder. First, we looked at the one in the town we spent the night in - Conwy Castle. Unfortunately, it was too early in the day so it wasn't open. After that, me and Hwa walked along part of the top of Conwy's town walls - preserved in excellent condition, yet not restored so much that you know it's restored (ala York). We then drove to Beaumaris, home of Beaumaris Castle - the "most technically perfect medieval castle" - except that it was never completed. The inner curtain walls being higher than the outer ones, thus allowing 2 fields of fire and fire from the inner ones when the outer ones were overrun, were a nice feature. But I wonder what use half a moat was.
Later, we moved on to Caernarfon. The toilet there was too high tech for me - instead of a normal sink, there was a metal hole in the wall. So I stuck my hand in, hoping to get some water to wash my calf, and wondered why so little water came out, and why it was so cold. It was soap. By the time I made this shocking discovery, the water had been flowing for a while, so I had to get more water to wash off the soap. So I stuck my hand in briefly and withdrew it as quickly as possible, but the nozzle was so well positioned that some soap still got onto my hand.
In the Eagle Tower, there was a theatrette screening a video that gave an overview of Wales' history, and of the castles of Edward I. It was good, except for this annoying chap who kept popping up in various garb, presumably to give the video a more personalised touch. Later, I climbed to the top of one of the turrets in the Eagle Tower (the highest point in the castle, I think) and ended up winded. All in all, I really liked Caernarfon (though my all-time favourite is still Krak des Chevaliers, the enduring image of which will always bring a tear to my eye) - it had a good exhibition, was well restored without giving the feeling of reconstruction (I like reconstruction too, but each has its place). Too bad I couldn't take a delicious aerial shot to encompass the totality of the castle.
We then drove through the expanses of Snowdonia. The sheer slopes of the mountains of slate, their tops shrouded in clouds, the rocky crags and outcrops sheathed in heather and sparse scrub or the plunging, verdant valleys - the general grandeur of it all was most impressive. Best of all, it wasn't raining like in the Lake District, so I actually preferred it to there. But again, as with the Lake District, there were no laybys for much of the way so we couldn't stop and take photos at some of the spots with the more spectacular views. Worse, at one point, when I was sitting on a rock in the middle of a river with Hwa, who had expended much more effort, with a great deal more fuss than me in getting there, posing for a shot to be taken by Jie, she couldn't figure out how to take a shot (women!) and by the time I went back to adjust the settings, my camera was low on batteries only 4 days after the last full charge. Amazingly, my backup batteries chose that moment to go flat too, and jiggling with 2 of Hwa's spare batteries to replace 2 of my 4 expended ones did not work, and I hadn't figured out that I could still take pictures by turning off the LCD. So that shot of us in the river was only taken with Hwa's 2 1/2 year old digital camera, with less than spectacular results.
As we drove through Snowdonia, we noticed not a few people had parked by the road and gone hiking in the mountains. Ugh. Apparently mountain hiking is really popular in those parts, as at one point there was even a spot with a car park, a cafe and - get this - a youth hostel (which I bought 4 AA batteries from at the princely price of 4 pounds 99 pence, which even scarier was not far from their price in more civilised areas - I think I could get rich smuggling film and batteries into Europe from Hong Kong).
At one part of Snowdonia, near a rather large town, we found what appeared to be the cheapest petrol in Britain - 70.9 pence/litre. On closer inspection, we found this to be a charade - the petrol kiosk had long since closed, but there was still a Little Chef there. I bet the price was deliberately set at that rate by Little Chef, so drivers would be conned into stopping and eating after they found out petrol wasn't actually being sold!
Our Youth Hostel for the night was Llangollen. There they sold "glowsticks, necklaces and bracelets - useful in an emergency, ideal for clubbing!", had an amusing poster on how to and not to use the shroud, and had internet access provided by another company, which was cheaper, faster and better. Oddly though, the door to our room could only be locked from outside, and not from inside. There was also an irritating pussy which kept brushing against my leg in a vain attempt to get me to feed it.
Misc notes:
Throughout the 2 weeks, Jie and Hwa kept claiming I was chopping consonants off the ends of my words. Partly this is because they are very niao, but I suppose my tongue has become lazy in Singapore, especially during my slavery. Incidentally though, even at my most pedantic, I never corrected people many times a day.
My camera seems to deliver overly-bright images.
The UK must be the only country in the world without Oreo McFlurrys. More's the pity.
There's something about these suspicious Youth Hostel descriptions. York, for exampled, was described as a "soothing stroll" from the City Centre, but we found it to be at least 40 mins walk from there. Many places were described as "ideal bases" to explore certain locations or attractions, but were extremely far from them. And there was deceptive advertising - the picture for Wooler showed a cyclist resting on the ground, with his bike thrown willy-nilly, looking out at the island of Lindisfarne. In the end, it was like half an hour by car from Wooler to Lindisfarne. I guess he was so upset at being tricked by the description that he threw the bike down in frustration and rage.
One of the girls in the St Helens Youth Band had this funky hairband with 2 devil's horns on them.
Hwa and Jie confess they are deprived - they get excited whenever they see a superstore.
I have serious doubts about the power of symbolism. The Eagle Tower in Caernarfon Castle is named such because it has sculpted eagles on top of it, and Edward I supposedly included this to gain the respect of the Welsh, who still remembered the Romans, if not fondly, then with respect. I think that the influence, strength and memory of the "collective consciousness" is very much overrated (Edward constructed his castles a century after the Romans left Britain).
In the 8 days, I kept seeing signs warning of speed cameras, but rarely saw one. I bet it's just a ploy to get motorists to slow down on the cheap.
Youth hostels should allow the truly destitute the sleep on the couch in the lounge for half the price.
The National Trust is really paranoid by not allowing indoor photography. Luckily, that doesn't affect me that much as I'm not that fond of houses.
TO BE CONTINUED
Post ID: 106529436971329276
Saturday, October 04, 2003
Ghostzilla - the invisible browser
The Romance Reader
MC Hawking's Crib - your ultimate resource for information about Stephen Hawking the gangsta rapper
QUIZ FOR PEOPLE WHO KNOW EVERYTHING:
1. There's one "sport" in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends. What is it?
2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?
3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?
4. Name the only sport in which the ball is always in possession of the team on defense, and the offensive team can score without touching the ball?
5. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?
6. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?
7. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters "dw." They are all common. Name two of them.
8. There are fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name half of them?
9. Where are the lakes that are referred to in the "Los Angeles Lakers?"
10. There are seven ways a baseball player can legally reach first base without getting a hit. Taking a base on balls--- a walk--- is one way. Name the other six.
11. It's the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh. What is it?
12. Name six or more things that you can wear on your feet that begin with the letter "S."
Answers:
1. Boxing.
2. Niagara Falls. The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute.
3. Asparagus and rhubarb.
4. Baseball.
5. Strawberry.
6. The pear grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the whole growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.
7. Dwarf, dwell, and dwindle.
8. Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation marks, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.
9. In Minnesota. The team was originally known as the Minneapolis Lakers and kept the name when they moved west.
10. Batter hit by a pitch; passed ball; catcher interference; catcher drops third strike; fielder's choice; and being designated as a pinch runner.
11. Lettuce.
12. Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, snowshoes, stockings.
The Romance Reader
MC Hawking's Crib - your ultimate resource for information about Stephen Hawking the gangsta rapper
QUIZ FOR PEOPLE WHO KNOW EVERYTHING:
1. There's one "sport" in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends. What is it?
2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?
3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?
4. Name the only sport in which the ball is always in possession of the team on defense, and the offensive team can score without touching the ball?
5. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?
6. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?
7. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters "dw." They are all common. Name two of them.
8. There are fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name half of them?
9. Where are the lakes that are referred to in the "Los Angeles Lakers?"
10. There are seven ways a baseball player can legally reach first base without getting a hit. Taking a base on balls--- a walk--- is one way. Name the other six.
11. It's the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh. What is it?
12. Name six or more things that you can wear on your feet that begin with the letter "S."
Answers:
1. Boxing.
2. Niagara Falls. The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute.
3. Asparagus and rhubarb.
4. Baseball.
5. Strawberry.
6. The pear grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the whole growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.
7. Dwarf, dwell, and dwindle.
8. Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation marks, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.
9. In Minnesota. The team was originally known as the Minneapolis Lakers and kept the name when they moved west.
10. Batter hit by a pitch; passed ball; catcher interference; catcher drops third strike; fielder's choice; and being designated as a pinch runner.
11. Lettuce.
12. Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, snowshoes, stockings.
Post ID: 106520453846502568
Friday, October 03, 2003
Latest discovery: store-bought chee cheong fun! It's not bad, and good for a quick lunch. AUD$2 for a plastic lunch box with 4 rolls with spring onion and shrimp stuffing (and the soya sauce) - just empty the soya sauce over it, pop straight into the microwave for 4-5 minutes and eat with the fork provided. Lasts in the fridge for 2-3 weeks: i should have bought more from asian groceries!
Post ID: 106515310216445528
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