"Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy." - George Carlin

***

My brother in law and I were walking out of Paragon after lunch at Ding Tai Feng (at which he ordered way too much because he was "hungry", though we didn't manage to beat the record of $80 at California Pizza Kitchen that we'd set in a previous week), when we were beset by a sombre-looking ponytailed Nanyang schoolgirl, one of a flock of ravenous birds of prey seeking donations.

As I am wont to do nowadays, I asked what the donations would be used for, and got a vague reply: "helping children with chronic diseases". I asked what sort of chronic diseases, and she said cancer. Sensing her dearth of knowledge regarding the charity, I failed her on my "flag day worthiness test", in which I ask the people accosting me some basic questions about the charity so I know my money won't be used to fund MILF efforts. So in the end my brother in law donated some coins to her.

I think that in the future, when ponytailed schoolgirls ask me for donations, I shall tell them that I'll give them a buck if they let me tug their hair!


Panelist 1: Schoolgirls will take you for some molester. I think you are developing into a psycho... It starts small, and by the time you know it, you're gone too far.
I thought I was already psycho.

Panelist 2: You'll be surprised at their desperation, You'll go broke in no time.

Panelist 3: You.. are evil to e core. Hey what if they ask to see yr moobs?
Then they'd have to pay *me*.

Panelist 4: Don't be accused of harassment!
It's a quid pro quo!

Panelist 5: u got sthg against schgirls w ponytails?:)

Panelist 6: Ha ha... A buck for a tug? That's trying to stretch your buck!

Panelist 7: That's prostitution dude, just on a smaller scale.

Panelist 8: I think that's perverse.
When have I not been perverse? Heh heh.