DR MAHATHIR MOHAMMED BLAMES MARTIANS FOR WORLD PROBLEMS
By J. Blair








SOME SOURCES THAT HAVE PROVIDED DR MAHATHIR WITH HIS INCONTROVERTIBLE EVIDENCE ON THE EVIL AND SEXUALLY WANTON NATURE OF MARTIANS

In his latest tirade one week after his scathing attack on Europeans, Malaysian Prime Minister Mahathir Mohammed has now targeted a "greater menace to mankind's future, more than the Europeans".

"Yes, it is the Martians." says Dr. Mahathir Mohammed.

"And they have a long history offering incontrovertible proof of their violent, evil and sexually wanton nature." He noted that the Martians have an "advanced civilization, that contained huge canals and cities to upstage earth's and craters that are actually huge missile silos." And he also complimented the Martians by saying that they're "very clever and brave, but also very greedy and have a history of attempting to conquer other planets, as their history will show."

According to Dr Mahathir, the martians have already been attempting to conquer earth by creating a string of natural disasters, including global warming, earthquakes, twisters and floods. "All these have been caused by Martians, who are now far more advanced in their weaponry than we can imagine. Their latest example has been the biological weapon known as SARS."

Dr Mahathir also says that the Martians are a "people of wanton and overt sexuality who have the exhibitionistic tendency of seeming to enjoy showing off their unusually well-proportioned bodies".

The documents that Dr Mahathir produced to reinforce his argument include a book by Edgar Rice Burroughs called "A Princess of Mars" ,a book by HG Wells called "The War of the Worlds", and some short films directed by a man who Dr Mahathir called a "superb Martian authority", Chuck Jones. He has recommended these sources for public patronizing.

"The Martians will not stop until they have taken away everything from us Malays." he concluded as he broke down in tears.

He also added that he is not a "speciesist" or a "planetist", adding that he has many "friends and acquaintances who are Martians."

But, he added, "he would tell the truth about the Martians as he sees fit."


Paradox is disrupting in 2 weeks!

On idealism and liberalism:

Rationally Speaking: A monthly e-column by Massimo Pigliucci
N. 28, September 2002: Why bother? Why being liberal is not a lost cause

Quote of the month:

"What used to be called liberal is now called radical, what used to be called radical is now called insane, what used to be called reactionary is now called moderate, and what used to be called insane is now called solid conservative thinking." - Tony Kushner


I am what most people in the United States would describe as an idealist, a progressive, a liberal, a social democrat, or worse. Consequently, the question that a few of my friends and I often ask ourselves is: why bother? Let me explain. The world some of us would like to see, and are fighting to help bring about with our actions and writings, is one in which more people will use reason to make their decisions; fundamentalist religion will be seen as silly at best, and profoundly misguided and dangerous at worst; the environment will be thought of a real priority; war will not be possible because of a truly civilized international system of police and tribunals (you know, just like modern societies are an improvement over the law of the jungle?); and human beings will engage not in the search for profit or shallow consumerism but in the pursuit of true happiness and fulfillment. Scary, eh?

Now, the world in which we actually live is apparently characterized by rampant superstition and nonsense; fundamentalist religion is seen as a respectable, even enviable, way of life; the environment keeps taking a beating notwithstanding international conferences and political pledges; wars are been fought all over the planet and more are in the planning; and many of our society’s role models are among the shallowest (movie and sports stars) and meanest (corporate executives) people one can think of.

I repeat: why bother? I mean: in order to be a liberal freethinker one has either to be a masochist or a hopeless optimist, completely out of touch with reality. We are bombarded with bad news every day and from every corner. Yes, we had eight years of Clinton, blessed be the memory of his presidency, but he wasn’t really a liberal or a progressive. Rather, he was a fairly moderate Republican (yes, you read correctly), and hardly slowed down the onslaught of corporate interests and environmental catastrophe that has been the hallmark of this country’s policy since Reagan. To make it even worse, now we have a president who was not elected democratically (hey, I thought that happened only in Third World countries!), who keeps showing a callous disrespect for the environment and an equally abominable close tie to big business, and of whom (for some reason) most people keep approving because he has “character” (by which they must mean that he is able to lie about his past better than Clinton did).

All of this sounds hopeless, and no matter what my friends and I write or do, it will likely not change perceptibly during our lifetime. Then again, before yielding to depression and committing suicide or, worse, going on annual pilgrimages to DisneyWorld, we should consider the idea of different temporal horizons of activism. You see, all that I have described so far happens at what I think of as the mid-time horizon, i.e., stretches of time that can be measured on the order of a human life. But there are at least two additional horizons to consider if you are as stubborn an optimist as I am.

First, there is the near-time horizon. This is the here and now, in which we can make a huge difference at the local level. Our doings and writings can touch people in countless ways. It’s true: I get testimonials via email every week. Our actions can make a difference between a school board adopting a textbook that teaches the nonsense of creationism and another based on the best science available. This will affect thousands of kids, immediately! True, a protest at the local nuclear plant may go completely unnoticed; but other causes, like the No-Global movement, have made themselves heard the world over (despite the obvious irony intrinsic in such success…). Furthermore, things do change in major ways, from time to time. Let’s not forget that the Soviet Union and the Berlin wall crumbled in front of our eyes after having been apparently unfaltering symbols of oppression for decades. Equally surprisingly, Nelson Mandela went from political prisoner to head of state in South Africa, and the Milosovic government in the former Yugoslavia disappeared. These things don’t happen if we leave the field entirely to conservative and regressive forces.

Then there is the long-time horizon. I know most people think history is boring, but that’s a pity, because they would find that things do change during the course of human history and, often enough, for the better. A few decades ago it would have been perfectly acceptable to enforce racist laws in the United States; today this is unthinkable. Not long before that, women were not allowed to vote, while now all political parties consistently court them. Slavery was sanctioned in Western countries until the 19th century, but it is now actively fought everywhere in the world. Religious fundamentalists may have a large influence on the cultural and political life of the United States and the Middle East, but that is a far cry from the absolute dominance of religious bigotry that characterized several centuries of Western history deservedly referred to as “the dark ages.” And the environment wasn’t even an issue until the second half of the 20th century. These long-term changes, like the short-term ones listed above, were made possible by the continuous action of people who kept protesting, marching and writing to further human flourishing in the broadest possible sense. Most of them saw no perceptible change for the better during their life times, but they believed it would eventually come if they kept up the struggle. They were right.

I am under no illusion that this column or anything I do will change the world, but I do know that people are positively affected by what is written and done in the here and now. And I know that it is because of my friends and colleagues who keep protesting against nonsense, greed and repression that we can conceive of a better future for humanity. Indeed, to some extent, that future has already happened.

The 6th Mono-Intake has come to the Cutting Edge (my unit)! It's time for all of us to practise uttering the sentence: "Never mind, whole lot knock it down!", or variants of the above. Some time before they came in, 2 posters went up on 2 facing walls. One says: "BMT. It's not what you leave behind. It's what you gain in the days ahead". Below, you see this forlorn guy and his sad-looking girl friend. So I suppose the message is you lose your girlfriend, and you get a bad haircut, courtesy of the 42SAR barber and friends. The other poster says "Welcome to 42SAR". I think a good subtext for that poster would be: "You die. All die." People say that BMT at a unit is more slack than at the Isle of Doom, and this seems to be borne out by the fact that the recruits aren't confined at the start of BMT!

We've gotten 10 new medics. This unexpected generosity has us overwhelmed. For once we will be at (sorta) full strength. Unfortunately, none of them are my juniors. All of them are privates, so the 2 1/2 year soldiers (most of them) will get to go through everything with the just-enlisted recruits, and ORD together with them. Joy! Meanwhile, people like me will get to skip ATEC :)

Now that the recruits have come, life has gotten worse for us. Perhaps it's to set the standards for the recruits, or so that they don't complain. For one, we can't sleep in bunk during lunch time anymore. So one of the few advantages of having a bunk is now gone, and we have even less reason to leave our work places.

I returned from NCC cover to discover that my Secret Garden had been desecrated! Argh. It took me all of a few minutes to re-sanctify it and re-consecrate it, so now it's back to normal.

The promising initiative whereby we could choose what meals to eat in order to save taxpayers' money has been killed in its prime. People will continue not to eat, regardless. More's the pity.

We've been made to purchase these "Free Singapore From SARS" combination lucky draw/scratch and win tickets issued by Singapore Pools at $3 each. The top prize is $1 million - maybe it's what they decided to do with the surfeit money is the Courage Fund. Now, how buying lucky draw tickets is supposed to kill SARS is a mystery. I don't think throwing yet more money at this particular problem is going to make it go away any faster. Anyhow, the tickets proclaim that all proceeds will go to "SARS-related community causes". This is a marvelously vague term. I suppose it could mean that the money is used to subsidise the purchase of floor disinfectant bought by Community Centres. Or maybe it goes to helping MOE and MINDEF pay for the thermometers that all pupils and soldiers got :) Now, all of this wouldn't bother me all that much, but for the fact that we've been -forced- to buy these tickets. Now, I remember that, a few weeks ago, some guy wrote in to the Straits Times forum asking why his son was forced to collect money for the Army Half Marathon. Colonel Bernard Toh, Director of Public Affairs at Mindef, naturally wrote in to assure everyone that no, servicemen are not forced to collect money for AHM. They're just given "targets". So now, with this dirty business made public, I assume that all servicemen are no longer forced to reach a target for AHM collections - hell, it came out on my unit's Routine Orders. The trouble is that, while AHM donations are no longer compulsory (unlike last year), the "Free Singapore From SARS" tickets are still being forced down our throats. Now, I could be a jolly chap and write in, like the father of that serviceman, and complain to Colonel Bernard Toh, and shame the SAF again. However, seeing my history of having letters rejected by the ST, and how, if they're feeling nasty, they'll invoke the Official Secrets Act and throw me into DB, I suppose that might not be such a wise course of action. Maybe I should just call the SAF Hotline :) 1800-6278-0022.

I felt a sudden urge to opine on Singapore's own Day of Infamy (a la Pearl Harbor, December 7th, 1941), while my feet were collapsing during the SAF Day parade rehearsal, but I find that it isn't really suitable.


The SAR-vivor rap is so bad that it will forever be seared into my mind, causing my untold horrific nightmares for all eternity.

I really should be careful when deleting CLSIDs from my Registry. I've had to re-install Windows twice already because I cocked something up.


Travelling on the new North East line gives me a feeling of deja vu. The stations are massive, multi-levelled and cavernous and you have to walk a lot to get to and from it from the old MRT lines. In the trains, you have signs reading "Mind The Gap". The air in the trains and stations isn't very cold, and smells slightly stale, with a little of the tunnel about it. And to complete it all, you have the Circle Line coming up in a few years.

One of the stated aims of the Circle Line is to let commuters bypass the crowded city. Somehow, I don't think building a new line will have much effect. For one, the stations bypassed by the new line aren't very many. Also, looking at the North East line and how much you have to walk to transfer to it, it is likely that any time saved by bypassing the City stations will be lost both to walking and waiting for the connecting trains.

I saw this device to give you a flashing belly button. It was advertised as being "for girls of all ages". Wth.

I finally saw a Scarlet Ibis (after which a short story I did in Sec 1 for Lit was named after) at the Zoo/Bird Park exhibit in Orchard.

In Korea, getting a tattoo gets you out of their conscription. People also try other ways of getting downgraded. Looks like Singaporeans aren't the only ones who detest being slaves.

Patriotism is, among other things, an urge to do what is best for one's country. However, in Singapore, the country is inextricably bound up with the government. To criticise or distrust the government is almost to be unpatriotic. In fact, the paper that people are forced to sign upon enlistment, and the oath that they swear (invalid, of course, under duress), contain copious references to the Government. So the question is: what happens when the Government is not acting in the interests of the country, and true patriots will be obliged to defy it?


I look into a crystal ball, and I see nothing. That's bad.


Quotes:

[On my observation that his hair had gained in volume during his ORD leave] You know why you're so fat? It's because you're so full of shit.

Only Ah Bengs like to go to Pasar Malams. Then they can buy their "No Fear" shirts.

4 days at NCC:

I finally prevailed upon Ban Xiong to send me to Amoy Quee to cover NCC courses over 4 days the past week, so I got to stay out for 4 days and have fun slacking over there. I and Bob were assigned to cover the Specialists' Course for Boys for the Central district, so we didn't get to shake our heads much at how girls' NCC is much slacker (for one, on the occasions you are in No 3, you can't get knocked down!), though what little I saw from the other contingents already confirmed my suspicions. Meanwhile, I was entertained and enlightened by Bob's many profound observations on life, the universe and everything.

After observing NCC training, I am more perplexed than ever about why young schoolchildren would want to spend a day or two each week, and more during the holidays, being tortured. Especially the boys. Aren't 2 to 2 1/2 years of full time bondage more than enough? Maybe it's all the masochists who join NCC, so they can perversely rejoice in their suffering. Or maybe they're just channeling their innate and hormonal urges to play at being soldiers, the same way children play with toy soldiers, tanks, planes and what not.

In some ways, NCC is even more regimental than the SAF. When the cadets sit on the floor, they adopt a posture reminiscent of the lotus position, sitting cross-legged with straight backs and stretching both arms out to rest on their knees. They then have to ask their ICs permission to relax and adjust themselves or to drink water. Why the ICs don't give this permission every now and then as a matter of course, or just ask the superiors for carte blanche permission for the cadets to rest, is beyond me. Hell, even their eating is regimental! The ICs are also very fierce, even though they are the same rank as their men. Maybe it's all the vying for recognition so they can get promoted faster, or get the title of Best Trainee. Anyhow, everything can probably be summed up in one word: "discipline" (read: stupidity). Of course, they have their home, their parents, their siblings, a soft, fluffy bed and lots of soft toys waiting for them at the end of the day (or the week, at most), and if worse comes to worst, they can always quit.

In some ways, too, it seems the NCC cadets learn more than we did during BMT. For example they learn how to search people at rifle point. But then they have even less practice than us, so.

I've always wondered why the SAF needs medics to cover all sorts of trivial things. In fact, in the past, I have even had to cover a *reception*. I don't know, maybe they feared some General would choke on a fishball, or something. In the first two days of my NCC cover, people managed to cut themselves while loading magazines into and stripping rifles, so I suppose we were there to stop parental complaints. Anyway, the Police and just about everyone else (schools, organisations holding outdoor activities and more) manage to get by without medical cover, so I suspect maybe they're just finding work for SAF medics to do so we don't become too slack.

I saw what should be all of the Army Recruitment Posters in the "who has the ~" series! I tried to think of spoofs of each, but I didn't succeed. Results of my brainstorming below:
- "Who has the spirit?" -> "Who has flagging spirits?". Picture will show soldiers after a 40km route march - shagged, demoralised and close to exhuastion.
- "Who has the firepower?" -> "Who has insufficient firepower?". Picture will show a M1A2 Abrams beside an SM-1.
- "Who will keep us safe?" -> The lack of tenacity, will, patriotism and determination of many SAFs (and not a few regulars) is well known. Nonetheless, I could not come up with a counterpart to this poster.
- "Who has the motivation?" -> "Who has no motivation?". Picture will show the miserly pay that NSFs get every month. "You pay me peanuts, you get a monkey". What else can be added to show why NSFs lack motivation?
- "Who has the vigilance?" -> "Who has no vigilance?". Picture will show people slacking and sleeping during guard duty, or sleeping at various other places, like in a tonner.
- "Who has the courage?" -> "Who has no courage?". Picture will show someone (me?) hesitating at the high ramp.


Quickies:

Shit rolls downhill. Officers get specialists or officer cadets to do their dirty work, specialists get enlistees or recruits, and enlistees get NCC cadets (if available) :)

There was this short SCGS girl who put her bag near ours, flashed a shy smile and walked away. Gah. I actually felt tempted to throw her bag at her. There should be a law to regulate people's acting cute.

As some NCC specialists were marching past Bob, who was eating Ikan Perdas, I was looking for the guy who was chanting the traditional "loop, loop, loop right loop". To my great shock, it was the person mentioned in the above paragraph! Looks like Raffles Guys is not the only institution which provides this sort of training.

Somehow, this quote from BMT came to mind while watching the NCC ICs count strength: "[Recruit to sergeant while counting strength: X and X blank files, IC!] Fuck. I go to SISPEC for 5 months, come out and become IC. Knock it down!"

In the NCC office, there was this Army recruitment poster claiming that girls got turned on by guys in uniform. Hmmph. Even if there are people whose heads are so easily turned, you won't get to meet many of them in uniform!

It was relatively easy to tell the NCC Cadets from KC apart from the other female cadets (ahem). Oddly, though, some wore a T-shirt which said, at the back, "KC NCC Land Girls". I didn't know there was a boys' contingent in that school.

You always hear people talking about when the weather status "Cat 1" (lightning), but you never get to hear of the other categories - kind of like Hongkong movies, in fact. You always hear about Cat III movies, but never about Cat I, Cat II, Cat IV and Cat V movies. Anyway I found that Cat 2 means that it is raining, and Cat 3 indicates sunny weather.

Some of the older NCC females were wearing green boots with a splash of black. They don't use these anymore nowadays. Interesting. I wonder what the rationale for green boots last time was anyway. Guess SAF wanted to save money.

Amoy Quee seems like a nice, empty, relaxed, slack camp to be in. And it's near civilisation too.

Amoy Quee provides lockers for you to put prohibited items in, but you are "advised" not to put valuables in there. Right. So what could be prohibited without being valuable? Diskettes? CDs? Pirated/pornographic VCDs?

Bob likes to walk so fast. He walked so fast, in fact, that I got abrasions on my left toes, and became all sweaty. Bah.

Sign seen at 20th Singapore Artillery: "Safety habits need to be grilled". Wth?!

I think 20SA's cookhouse can clinch the coveted prize of "Worst Cookhouse In The SAF".

Since it's their lull period, people from 2SIR get to book out daily after their Company Runs. Looks like we in 42SAR really got shortchanged. Hell even 46SAR company line people are stayout during lull.

Strangely (or otherwise) enough, it was rather nice to be addressed as "Sir". I never knew I took even a smidgen of delight in such shallow and trivial things.

It's nice to be able to change your uniform daily.

The NCC song in its full horror! You can (naturally) listen to the mp3 too.

There's actually a further incident that I would put here, but someone accused me of being sick, so I won't talk about it :)

[continued below]

[continued from above post]

Quotes from and about NCC:

Just hang yourself around here (around)

[On adolescence] It's natural for a girl to act cute, c'mon, especially at that age.

Ask her to take a seat and have an interview with us. [Me: What interview?] Medical checkup. [Me: ...]

[On items in the Medical Orderly Pouch being useless during peace time] The girl comes to you. "Sir, can you spare me one FAD?" [Me: For what? Padding ah?] Yah.

[Me on NS breakups: A lot, especially during BMT. That's if the girls are fickle.] Girls are all fickle, come on.

Platoon 3, on your berets - up! (put on)

[On screwing NCC cadets] Look at it this way. They enjoy being tortured, otherwise they won't be here... Those who don't like to be tortured would have quit after the first week.

All so ugly... How come I don't have luck this time?... No nice bodies, no nice faces, no nice features.

[Me on why the gender ratio is not demoralising: Because Singaporean men are shit] Yes, just like you and me... Those who are not shit are bastards.

I conclude that girls who join NCC aren't very feminine.

Wah kao, I saw a girl with muscular legs. *walks off* I like girls with well-toned legs. I don't like girls with masculine legs.

Gee.

Now I've 14 pages of minutes to type.


I think that, as a quasi-nick, "N!ôrlãn" ceased to resonate with me long ago. As such, I have removed it from my Blogger profile.

The outside world seems to be more forbidding these days.

The Secret Garden - I Heard Someone Crying

[LILY]
Oooooooooooh

[MARY]
I heard someone crying
Who tho' could it be
Maybe it was Mother
Calling out, come see.
Maybe it was father
All alone and lost and cold
I heard someone crying
Maybe it was me

[LILY]
Ooooooooh

[ARCHIBALD]
I heard someone singing
Who tho' could it be
Maybe it was Lily,
Calling out to me
Maybe she's not gone
So far away as I've been told
I heard someone singing
Maybe it was she

[MARY]
Maybe it was someone I could
Find and have a cup of tea
Maybe it was someone who
Could bring the tea and come find me

[LILY]
Ooh
I heard someone crying
Tho' I can't say who
Someone in this house
With nothing left to do
Sounded like a father
left alone his love grown cold
I heard someone crying
Maybe it was you

[MARY AND ARCHIBALD]
Maybe I was dreaming of a garden growing far below
Maybe I was dreaming of a life
That I will never know

[MARY (LILY)]
I heard someone crying
Who tho' could it be

Someone in this house (Ooo...)
Whom no one seems to see (Ooo...)
Someone no one seemed to (Ooo...)
Hear except for me(Ooo...)

I heard someone calling
Maybe it was he

(Ooo...)
(Ooo...)

[ARCHIBALD]
Lily, where are you, I'm lost without you
I can't walk these halls without you

Lily, where are you, I'm lost wihtout you
I have searched the world but you're not there
Come and tell me why you
Brought me home if you're not here

My Lily, where are you, I'm lost without you
Lily, I am lost

Without you

[MAJOR HOLMES]
I heard someone crying
Who else could it be
Surley it was Mary
Why can no one see

[ROSE, CLAIRE, ALICE]
Crying for her mother
For the life she's never known

[ALBERT]
So lost
See her lying
In her room alone

[LILY]
Ooo...

Whee.

Hotmail Popper has been updated to version 2. It finally supports SMTP, and it's still free. It seems faster than what seems to be its only competitor, Izymail, and the company coding the latter has recently been making its standalone application more and more expensive and crippled so people take out a subscription to its online service, thus ensuring the company a continuous cash flow. Cunning.

Other POP3/SMTP gateway clients (only the AOL one is not free) for Yahoo and AOL available on the same page I found out about Hotmail Popper 2.


Remote Operating System Build in Netscape (Robin) is
"a window manager using DHTML, Javascript, XUL and some crazy hacks". With it, you can play, among other things, XulMine, Mozteroids, Pagman, Snake, Xultris and MozInvaders.


A new twist on an old concept. I first heard the WAV many years ago, in Lower Secondary if my memory serves me right. All thanks to Tim, of course.

Oh, and apparently the artist is this guy called Dennis Leary. I always knew it wasn't Monty Python (just like many of those "Weird Al Yankovic" mp3s aren't by him), but I never got down to finding out who that guy with the sonorous voice was.


The Straight Dope on 2B, B, HB and other types of pencils.

Harry Potter and the Meaning of Life - Gah. It's just a book. Just like The Matrix is just a movie.

I can't believe there is anyone who can read this (An Interview With Ann Coulter) without cringing or feeling sick. Many forms of conservatism are just sick.

A virtual glass ceiling in 'EverQuest'?

More Search Referrals

8 year old singaporean kid makes porn site - That's a big young, isn't it?

"raffles girls" "lesbian" - I thought it was the franchise school that was famous for this sort of thing.

"Muslims want to take over the world"

muhammad satanic paedophile

pictures of young girl drinking one liters of cum - Won't she choke?

"ong chiau jin"
"rosie smith" ri - :)

zaogeng
what does zaogeng mean - Interestingly, this is no longer the only coherent site you get when you search for "zaogeng". Guess everyone likes to talk about it nowadays. Maybe they got inspired after searching for zaogeng and finding little of relevance. Also, some psycho set up a poll about which HCJC girl zaogengs the most - "We all know jc gals like to zaogeng a lot! Dun be selfish! Let's share with us all your peeping experiences from your 2 yrs in hjc!!!". Right.

bestiality and sars - That's a really sick thought.

pretty rgs girl

Seven Habits of Ah Beng - Erm. 1. Scratching their ears with their little fingers 2. Wearing gold chains 3. Perming their hair 4. Speaking bad english 5. Squatting 6. Perpetually walking around on the handphone, or with the hands free set draped around their necks 7. Beating people up

sweaty scgs uniform
uniform fetish scgs - I'm not surprised

HPFterror.mov - It's spread so quickly.

tomoko fuck - Interestingly, a new version of Hentai Simgirl is out. They've completed one of the girls and added 2 more. Anyhow, I gave up after a while. I couldn't find a way to talk to the girl they'd finished.

naked sundal - I believe "sundal" means "prostitute" in malay or some Indian language.

serbee rjc culottes - See! I'm not the only one who noticed!!!


Argh, somehow the Ho Poh Fun video played at the same time as "Mountain Battle II" from Baldur's Gate II. Strangely appropriate. Or maybe not :0

I've finally been moved to Dano. It's looking good. Yeh!





On those ridiculous OB markers (though I wonder why there's a need to refer to the economic aspect of stifling free thought and speech in the headline):

TO PROMOTE ENTREPRENEURIAL DRIVE AND CREATIVITY...
Why have OB markers?

I REFER to the Insight articles on OB markers revisited (ST, June 21). What concerns me are the consequences of having out-of-bounds, or OB, markers.

In such an environment, is it any surprise that there is a stifling of entrepreneurial drive? The idea that some things cannot be challenged is surely not the mentality of a risk-taker.

Sterility and a lack of creativity are surely tied to the decision to tell people what they can and can't think about. Not to mention a feeling of being an alien in one's place of abode.

Are apathy and lack of awareness among the public not clearly linked to being told what one can or cannot think about? After all, if you are not interested in what I have to say about the most important of issues, why should I bother saying anything at all?

Shall I limit my comments to bus-fare hikes and the new train line? Indeed, these are the sort of discussions which engage the nation presently.

Is a lack of social cohesion a surprise? Avoiding public discussion of what are considered explosive issues only means that the society never gets a chance to grow in understanding. How long are people supposed to be protected from their own supposed irrationality?

The idea that one should not think about some things because otherwise there will be trouble stems from a patronising view of the mass of society. Maybe it is valid. I really can't say I know.

But again, not discussing things openly does not mean that people don't have opinions. It does not mean that issues will go away. All it means is that there is an artificial environment of people living beside each other but not with each other.

Strange ideas grow in strength because they are not challenged in open discussion. For what is not aired in open discussion will be whispered among like-thinking people in corridors. Woeful it will be when somehow these ideas gain momentum despite attempts to control the ideas that can be circulated.

When I think about the basis for a belief in the need for OB markers, what comes to mind is a father with a brood of children who aren't really able to think straight and make the right choices. So the father draws lines and says, thus far but no farther.

Whether this is a true portrayal of Singapore society, I cannot say. I do know that I am not a child and have little interest in discussing things when treated like one.

As for the rest of the society, as long as the father goes on treating them as children, he can only expect that they will behave like children. To treat them as children and then expect them to be creative, entrepreneurial individuals with passionate opinions on issues seems misguided to me.

THOMAS KOSHY

It seems no one is able to watch the video of Ho Poh Fun soundly screwing the poor student. After some poking, I have divined that it is because only bo liao people like me (and He Who Must Not Be Named, and presumably Mr Brown) have the latest Quicktime Codecs.

And so industrious me went to download the excellent RAD Video Tools to convert the arcane quicktime file into something else. And then when I tried to save it as a DivX Fast-Motion file, it ballooned from the original 4mb to 9mb. Looks like the guys at Apple have been working hard at their codecs! Kudos are due.

Anyhow, you can download it here - http://gssq.web1000.com/HPFterror.avi. Enjoy.


Rough transcript:

"The correct way [...] review articles, and you chose to define, and you wrote:

'These articles are taken from this book.' You expect me to go and buy the book because I mark your work?

[student weakly mumbles]

[dismissively] Whatever it is. Up to now, you still have not - where are the articles. If you are as innocent as you [student mumbles again] stop talking. If you are as innocent as you sound, where are the articles? [...]

It would show the sincerity, of yourself as a mid-year[?] student, where are your articles?

[Student mumbles]

Please don't say that. You explain to me, where are the articles? What have you been doing 1 1/2 weeks. So stop trying to be innocent, stop giving excuses for yourself *with emphasis*. I don't want to take it.

I told you already, one week ago at remedial. You ah, said, 'Oh Ms Ho, I'm going to be a good GP student. I change and all that.' I said, 'Actions speaks louder than words,', so you are a sly crafty old rat. *pause* Aren't you? (That is using the literary language from my training as a literature student.)

I mean, this is what it means! You're trying to cover up - your insolence, your defiance, your laziness, your apathy, your lethargy and your bad attitude.

You'll do it again. [rips essay into two] And by the way, your articles, ah, are all about weirdos, all about all sorts of, you know, anti-establishment [...], I would say, unhealthy topics. [student mumbles a weak 'No,'] Your work is supposed to be upbeat, on current affairs. I do not want to read backdated essays, alright, of weirdos and eccentrics.

[Reads from the essay] 'Welcome to the global village.'... And it's all about, you know something about politics, whatever it is.

[continues reading] 'Do you feel the deaths of strangers? The joy of men. Of the poor man's(?) revenge. The need for new gifts.' Fair enough, but I do not want this crap. I want, up to date, current affairs articles. All the good PRC students have never disappointed me from Day One. You are the first student I've met who'll do this sort of thing to me.

Firstly you're tardy about handing in your work. Secondly, you ignore the teachers' instructions, you do as you like. You do your work on your own terms. If you want to do your work on your own terms, you get out of this college. You don't have to come to school, to listen for teachers to give instructions. And why is it teachers giving instructions? To help you, so you can get on with your work well. [shreds homework]

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He Who Must Not Be Named is really insufferable.

Not content with the various little niggly ways in which he spreads Death, Famine, Plague and Prestilence throughout the world, he has this annoying habit of seeking to ruin people's enjoyment of various things that they have not yet seen. Case in point: Star Wars 2, Harry Potter 5.

Now, I am by no measure a rabid fan of either of these over hyped series, but at the time at which he spoilt them for me, I was planning to getting down to watching/reading them.

I am sorely tempted, at this juncture, to block him, to prevent further aggravation as well as pictures of nude sumo wrestlers, but he does provide some small measure of amusement on lonely winter nights when the coals in the fireplace have gone out. I was also tempted to reveal - horror - his name, so his adoring fans can go adore, stalk and lynch him, but I decided, at this juncture, that it wasn't quite the time to do so.

Anyhow, the castigation and ostracism that he has enjoyed, is enjoying and will be enjoying in the Past, Present and Future, are sufficient punishment for him - though I suspect that, like a true-blue masochist, he revels in flagellation, and especially in griping about his sad tales of how he is despised.


For those who are eager to find out how lucky they are not to be bothered by said person, a transcript (of sort) follows below (highlight the text to read it):

mindgame: have you read order of the phoenix?

kimberly: no
should I?

mindgame: i have

kimberly: how?
no don't spoil

mindgame: during my sojourn in singapore, i had some spare time

kimberly: in that 'spare' time you finished all of it?

mindgame: so i guess you don't want me to tell you that ron weasley dies:)
i read fast.
and borders has comfortable seats

kimberly: i hate you
anyway that's a rumour that was quenched by a friend
her friends flipped to the end and found that he was still talking

mindgame: oh fine, fine.
it was mcgonagall.

kimberly: whatever
for all I know it could have been draco
aww. no more slash stories

kimberly: anyway I'm not a rabid fan
and anyhow, you wonder why people dislike you?
hmmph

mindgame: hahah
okay. seriously it was sirius black. he got nailed by the Death Eaters at the climax when the prophecy about Voldemort being Harry Potter's uncle was revealed.
bwahahahaaha
i have been enjoying myself telling rabid fans at my office who died

kimberly: I should put you on ignore or something
anyhow I won't let you spoil what's left of my day
hmmph

mindgame: bwahhahaha
once again, darkness has prevailed over light

kimberly: I know what I will do
I will shame you publicly

mindgame: *shrugs*
slander me on your website, if you will
it doesn't change the fact that aunt petunia is actually a witch in denial

Woah. Word spreads fast.

No less than Mr Brown has now highlighted the Ho Poh Fun video.

Methinks the subject of the video has heard of this by now! Good luck to the camera man. Maybe he can film part 2 :0

I'm a bright!

Since my 6 months' excuse (given thanks to a certain MO) has ended, I have run SOC twice - once in clean fatigues and the second with everything on, under test conditions. My regression since last October or so is clear - my balance, confidence and fitness are all much worse now, resulting in greatly magnified agony, and greatly decreased performance when throwing myself against this figurative brick wall. Hell hath no fury like my Ops Sergeant when confronted with a definite IPPT/SOC failure with no way to exclude him from the rankings. I trust that fate will lead me to the prophesied Final Solution. As do the Powers That Be - for some reason, they scheduled me for the SOC test -before- I'd passed IPPT, even though it is definitely harder to pass the former.

Being a cheapskate in some areas and not really caring about how my hair looks, I risked the 42 SAR barber again. Only this time, I caught him napping. Now, I wouldn't have wanted to wake him, but a drill lesson was scheduled later in the week, and I had no care to trudge up to his shop again, so I woke him up as gently as I could. He shaved around my ears and trimmed a little slope at the back of my head, then proclaimed the job finished. Feedback from someone: "A bit wai1... Here a bit short, here a bit flat". Now, even for my wretchedly low standards, this sort of haircut is unacceptable, so in my disgust, I did not tip him $2 as I was about to do, more out of pity than anything else.

I am surprised that MINDEF came clean to the public about 1st Commandos being disqualified for this year's Best Unit Competition (one of the worst ideas to sprout in the SAF ever). Actually, on a closer reading of the tell-all article, one can intuit why - the Defence Correspondent heard the rumour on an internet chat room and then queried MINDEF, which didn't have the heart or the wherewithal to stonewall. I wonder how many more open "secrets" are going to leak out next! Considering that everything is given a security classification one level above what is sensible, it probably wouldn't be much of a loss. As a reservist told me, "Restricted stuff will embarass the SAF if it is leaked". Or as I put it, "Restricted stuff is just classified for the heck of it".

Ever since moving bunk, we've had the same number of people in fewer bunks, with fewer toilets and corridors. Infuriatingly, however, our area cleaning chores have multiplied like the heads of a Hydra. We now have to clean all sorts of odd, faraway areas. For example, I (and I alone) got saddled with the canteen and the corridor above the squash courts which is shrouded in darkness in the morning, so nowadays I might as well go for breakfast.

It seems there are 2 Inet terminals in my canteen and 1 in my cookhouse, but they're never open. Tut tut. In other news, the food stall at my canteen - All Ranks Canteen - has opened again, in anticipation of the new recruits. I wonder how long it'll be before the recruits realise that the 42SAR canteen definitely isn't the best canteen to spend your canteen breaks in.

My cookhouse served "Spanish Omelette" one day. Intrigued, I tried to make enquiries, but no one had anything useful to tell me, the most I got out of the SFI staff being, "The Spanish Omelette was cooked by Spanish people". (...)

I bought, for $1, an artificial potted plant to brighten up my Docu Table. Now we know how $1 shops make money. Meanwhile, I came to work one day only to find that my trusty fly swatter was broken! I assume people were hitting each other with it too often. Oh well, it's only $1. At the same time, the pin of my fragile and lousy Number 3 "Agagooga" nametag fell out, so I can't pin it to my black slingbag anymore. Gah.

Our ceiling fans were spirited away one day, leaving us with only 2 standing fans that our CSM kindly acquired for us. As such, the bunk was a furnace at night. Yet, someone could still sleep with a blanket on. Argh. Thank god for my Secret Garden.

Some time ago, I meditated and got a revelation about the Holy Trinity, the Holy Trinity that keeps all of us safe, protected and out of trouble. Simply, no one Knows, no one Checks and no one Cares. May it always be that way :)


Irritating quotes seen inside a toilet in my unit:

"The significance of a man lies in not what he attains but rather what he longs to attain" : In that case, madmen and megalomaniacs would be very significant. Or how about if I aspire to be a god? Ahh, then I would have lots of significance, wouldn't I?

"The thoughtless are rarely wordless" - Howard W Newton : So by implication, those who speak the most are the most daft. How about those who have a "meaningful" or "inspirational" quote for every situation, and then some?


Melvin and I finally saw one of Ban Xiong's unspecified friends! He went off with her for half an hour, then came back looking pleased - a "quickie", according to the former. At least one of them is now specified. Unfortunately, he will continue to shroud his actions in an impenetrable cloak of secrecy, meeting unspecified friends in unspecified locations at unspecified times for unspecified periods of time doing unspecified things (Ooh, delicious line).

It seems RI has changed their PE T-Shirt again. Not satisfied with giving all the boys left nipple abrasions with the ironed on crest (as opposed to the former printed one), it seems that the Powers That Be have now decreed that the word "Raffles" on the back of the T-shirt, with the black bars be moved higher to be near the neck of the wearer. Eech!

I was killing time in Choa Chu Kang Community Library and I noticed that it was awfully noisy. I think the former RJ librarians should be sent there - they'll go nuts.

I was playing Dungeons and Dragons, Shadow Over Mystara for the first time since I completed it with Marc at Segaworld Sydney (free play is the -only- way to go for this sort of game unless you're filthy rich!), and I realised that it's more complex than I thought. For example, you can whack enemies who are prone on the floor. And I found out how to Turn Undead! Only problem is that there's some key jamming problem - sometimes when one player presses his magic/use item button, the other player's magic is activated. Oh, and Synn has this cheapskate move where, in dragon form, she can deplete your full health bar, and she does it 2-3 times.


Quotes:

[Me to an RP: Do you want to see my camp pass?] No, I want to eat your Long John's

[Fellow medic to me: Where is the coastal margin?] Let me see... Costal margin. 'Coastal' is by the sea

[Someone on the Documentation Room: All the other tables, don't have zhar bor {pinned underneath the glass}] Wang cannot. Wang put there, jialat. Everyday sit there and wank. Grab the table.

Completed Age of Mythology. Very fun. Of course, now I've had enough of Real Time Strategy Games for at least 3 months.

I think one reason they've moved to 3D engines is to save money on cut scenes - you can just manipulate the game engine and add narration for your 'cutscenes'. Bah.

I've also taken a fancy to "A Cat Named Mittens" (the main theme).




I bought action figures of the Black, Pink and Yellow Space Rangers on impulse in times of yore. Sadly, Cassie lost her face piece some time back. On the up side, the toy makers endowed her and Ashley with unnatural bosoms.


Become Smarter by Bombarding your Brain with Electro-Magnetic Waves (New York Times, registration required)

I daily get traumatised by ever more horrific sights.

Somehow, following links on a survey MIW sent me to try to entice me into letting them spam me, I came across this:

Our Army Songs Website

The music has been updated and beats can be heard in the background, but most of the lyrics are still sickeningly jingoistic and deceiving. I *am* surprised that they have a song called "Knock It Down", though:

"Hello, I am your Sergeant. And you are all my men.
You will listen to exactly what I say, understand?

When I ask you to eat, you eat...
When I say sleep, you sleep!
Do you know what I will do for you
If you screw up my plan?

Knock it down Knock it down
Get your hands on the ground and
Knock it down Knock it down
Just take it like a man and Knock it down"

*shudder*

I've seen 2 of the music videos (yes, all the songs there are available in MUSIC VIDEO format, with karaoke style higlighting of lyrics too), and it seems that almost all of the footage was taken during Obedience School on the Island of Doom.

More typing. This time on grammar tests.

Joyful jovial jubilation!


Britain's heart is broken

HUNDREDS of tearful David Beckham fans swamped The Sun's grief helpline yesterday after news of his move to Spain. Some readers were so upset by his departure from Man Utd to Real Madrid that they said they were considering SUICIDE. Others claimed they would have trouble performing in BED with the England skipper playing abroad. And many gay men rang in saying they were devastated by the departure of one of their most popular icons...

Worried Steve, 26, from Sheffield, said: "My wife fancied Becks so much. The heat is now on me to perform in bed and I'm worried about getting aroused."

Another caller, who didn't want to be named, said: "Beckham defined my sexuality. Now he's gone I don't feel I'll be able to perform in bed."

Colin Stuart, 25, from Mill Hill, North London, said: "Becks has helped me realise I am gay. I think I will have problems with my partner now as we both liked him."

Dan, 35, from London, said: "I'm terribly upset. He was a gay icon and I loved him. I can't concentrate on my work."

Student Rob, 21, also from London, said: "He was a gay icon. I feel abandoned now he has gone. I feel empty - I thought he would always be there."

Chef Lee Brown, 23, of Preston, said: "My wife is Beckham nuts and is moving to Spain to be near him. If I don't go our relationship's over."

Another caller who didn't want to be named said: "My friend has Beckham tattoos on his arm and has threatened to cut it off."

Dad Frank Wilson, 33, from London, said: "I've never been so upset. My whole family are crying.

I cried myself to sleep after hearing the awful news.
Grandmother Mary Richards, 85

"I'm going to burn my Manchester United kit and give up my season ticket."

Telesales worker David Phillips, 27, had similar problems.

He said: "My whole family are in tears. What am I supposed to tell the kids?"

Daniel Payne, 21, from Bromley, Kent, said: "I'm so upset. I can't believe he's gone."

And 24-year-old salesman Akhmed, of Oxford, said: "He was like a god to me. I have a tattoo of him on my chest. I feel powerless that he's gone."

Hannah, 17, said: "I've followed Becks all my life. I don't know how I'll get through my A-levels now."

Gran Mary Richards, 85, said: "I cried myself to sleep after hearing the news."

London cabbie Colin Bennett said: "The world's gone mad � he's only a bloody footballer."

Counsellor Dai Lloyd-Hughes: "The most important thing to do if they're upset is talk about it. If their feelings persist they should talk to the Samaritans or visit their GP."

Psychotherapist Mick Walsh: "Because we see Becks so often, many feel they know him personally. Now he's gone it's like someone they know has died."

Hahaha oh dear.

Someone sent me a video, taken surreptitiously on a Clie, of Ho Poh Fun scolding a student. This is probably the modern day equivalent of what I was doing with my Palm IIIc in J2 :)

I was never taught by her, but this is what I always imagined her lessons were like :)

http://synthesis.port5.com/stuff/HPFterror.mov [Not hosted by me, btw]

Enjoy.

Gah. I take a day off, then when I come back my mother makes me type schoolwork for her again.


Learning English for Japs - Home English Home

Liquid Nitrogen Ice Cream

Mao Zedong communist posters! God, they even have some against Falungong, the "Evil Cult" - "To combat Falun Gong, the Party has sought recourse to propaganda techniques not seen since the Cultural Revolution. These include character assassination (of Li Hongzhi and others), cartoons reminiscent of the lampooning of class enemies, endless essays depicting the deleterious effect of the doctrine, documentaries exposing movement leaders as frauds and followers as dupes, etc. The "struggle" against Falun Gong has even resulted in a revival of the use of propaganda posters beyond merely educational or congratulary purposes."

M'sia: Don't buy original CDs and DVDs. A rare insight from Ma-laysia: "The refusal of recording companies to lower prices despite repeated calls by the government was helping fuel the trade in pirated movies, music and software, alleged Deputy Domestic Trade and Consumer Affairs Minister S. Subramaniam. The minister pointed out that some genuine movie video CDs (VCD)--a popular format in Asia--cost as little as US$2.60, indicating that some profit is possible even at that price. These cheaper discs also do not get pirated, he said. 'Those priced at RM$30 (US$7.90) and above are normally the ones that get pirated. This proves that the price factor is the main reason consumers buy pirated CDs and VCDs,' he told the news daily the New Straits Times."

'In Malaysia, prices are fixed individually by the respective recording company. If one company fixes a price too high, it will find itself priced out of the market.' - Recording Industry Association of Malaysia's General Manager. Right. Not heard of oligopolies, monopoly profits and collusion, has he?

Tailors for cats


Haha.

SNE 86

22. That a father wrote in to complain that the his son's unit wanted donations for the Annual Army Half-Marathon donation card to be at least a certain amount.

The official reply from Mindef was that no minimum amounts were asked for, just guidelines given.

In other words,

-the CO tell the S4 he wants the men to fall in at 0800h

-the S4 tells the OC that the CO wants the men to fall in at 0700h in Smart 4 uniform

-the OC tells the PC that the CO wants the men to fall in at 0600h in Smart 4, SBO, Helmet, and Rifle

-the PC tells the Platoon Sgt the CO wants the men to fall in at 0500h in Full Battle Order

-so the Platoon Sgt tells the men to fall in at 0300h in Full Battle Order and go for 24km Forced march

23. That Pte Teo will now go back to camp and enjoy the blanket party from his Platoon mates because all of them will be enjoying weekend guard duty for the next 20 years (there is no minimum number of guard duties, it is just a guide).

All because "one of you buggers go and complain your fardder mardder over a stoopid donation card".

Next time your enemy come to your foxhole, remember to complain to your fardder marder too.

24. That Pte Teo will now get to enjoy many "coffee sessions" and heart-to heart talks with his CO about the personal problems he seems to be having with his Army Half-Marathon donation card.


"Thought control is a copyright of totalitarianism, and we have no claim to it. It is not the function of government to keep the citizen from falling into error, it is the function of the citizen to keep the government from falling into error." - Robert H Jackson

"What is freedom of expression? Without the freedom to offend, it ceases to exist." - Salman Rushdie

Hi everyone; i know this is short notice- i will be coming back to singapore on 8 july to 20 july. Would love to catch up with u guys (if you're a stranger who stumbled onto gabriel's blog ... i'm sure you're a wonderful person whom i would treasure if i got to know you); unsure if i will have a handphone in singapore so contact me by icq or call me at home. Even better if u can suggest a time/tell me when you're free. For those in JC- school starts already rite? In any case, appointments are more feasible esp if

a) they do not clash with dinner (have to be at home at that time)
b) they are near my house (i.e. places in the west, holland v etc)

My brother will be coming back as well so i'm really looking forward to spending this time with him and my parents.
Will try my best to contact u once i reach singapore, but no promises.
Do u want anything from melbourne? Kai, i'll try to get u fudge ... i'm trying to find a recipe for it now my exams are over actually so if mine turns out okay.... Gabriel kettle chips i suppose... they came up with new flavours u know! called "sensations". Anyone anything else?

I'm going to take over documentation work soon - argh. The day of reckoning had been postponed, but the Fates have finally caught up with me. Argh. Come, Clotho and Lachesis, I fear you not, for Cheong will be to my left, Gollum opposite me, and Boon Wei (my upper study) halfway across the Island in Temasek Poly, but just a phone call away!

Apparently, my sleep is disturbed in more ways than one - the drivers claimed I screamed in my sleep at 2 am one morning while on duty. Also, someone else also thinks that it's impossible to rest well in the medical centre, so it's not just me. Maybe it's the Sudol/Printol that interferes with the body's systems.

I'm being put on a training regimen again. Only, this time it seems that it will be followed up upon by my own Platoon Commander. So maybe it will work this time. Maybe. So maybe pigs will fly (I may pass IPPT), but the Palestinians will never bomb the Kabaa (I'll never pass SOC). On the bright side, I might finally grasp at The Final Solution this time, what with the daily training. Hopefully, it will be enough for my goals, yet not so strong as to incapacitate me seriously.

Sathiesh and Ban Xiong were laughing at Chemistry with me. It's such a joy to find people who appreciate bad TV, and who make snide remarks with you. Anyhow in our attempts to give credit where it is due, we noticed that the male in the female body left his/her legs open, while the female in the male body closed her/his legs. It's the little things like these that make of break a show!

The reservist cookhouse has Wireless Internet Surfing. Wah. But I thought laptops were illegal... Oh well, reservists can do anything, I suppose.

Apparently it is useless to wash any clothes in camp, due to the lack of sunlight, so I will stop doing so.

Jason is keeping track of the number of times I flip the bird. It stands at 4 now. Wah.

Boon Wei and I were at the bus stop when a convoy of trucks rolled past us, and some black sludge spilled out the back onto the road. This sludge smelled like shit - only worse, and we were over the moon when the bus finally came. Meanwhile, the trucks continued speeding on. I think by the time they reached their destination, most of the sludge was gone.


We've just shifted into new bunks, so we're now at the opposite end of the level. During the shifting day, I was on duty, so I didn't have to lug cupboards, but the flip side was that everyone "choped" all the good beds. No matter, the Workshop people will be leaving for good in about a month, and meanwhile I have my Personal Bunk in a Top Secret location. Either that or I can sleep on the floor like I used to do in SMM.

Pros of new bunk:
- More people
- Nearer to water cooler
- Showers are more powerful
- Mobile shoe cabinets
- New pillow!

Cons of new bunk:
- More people
- Hotter and more stuffy if you're not on the top beds just beside the fan
- If you take the top beds, climbing the ladder hurts your feet and transaction costs are high to either mount or dismount the bed
- Smaller cupboard
- Larger lock required for cupboards

To reduce the pain involved in mounting or dismounting the bed, I hit upon the idea of padding the ladder's steps. This was pronounced as being "very you" by Melvin, and is the latest in a line of things I have done against his advice of "Don't do stupid things".


I'm so touched!

Xephyris and Chinx took this picture for me while in Japan ^_^' <-- teardrop




Quotes:

Don't send me porn. I only have 10MB left on my hard disk.

[On screaming in my sleep] You must have been having a good dream. You sounded like you were making love.

[Review of Ju-On] When the show degenerates into Night of The Living Dead mode with a superfluous bunch of zombie schoolgirls, it is bye-bye time.

[On padding the steps of the ladder used for mounting the bed] You provide more entertainment than the TV

[On Lu Rui En] She sounds like she's from RJ... [Me: Do I sound like I'm from RJ?] Yes.

[On Lu Rui En] She can speak properly in this ad, why can't she speak properly in the show?

[Sees me brandishing a fly swatter] What are you doing? [Me: Trying to kill the fly] It's on your hear, dude, it's on your head. [Someone else: What's he doing?] He's trying to kill the fly [Someone else: These people are mad man, these people are mad]

[Geraldine] I don't look that good what

Someone who wants to remain anonymous sent me this labour of love, which should be familiar to some RJ alumni. This person is very endearing and his/her lessons were always very memorable... Needless to say, names have been removed to protect the innocent:

jc1revision5thjune[1].doc


market failure:
goodness gracious me!
when the government wants to do a cost benefit analysis it must know which are private and external costs and benefits, HELLO hello.

Do you understand or not? And then for the other on - eh *** you got it wrong i worked out the answer for you if they give you 2 variables; if they give you mpc and mpm then you still have foreign trade mulitiplier. GO AND READ the notes. i prepared you very well.

YOU BETTER do your work or else I will send you to see the vp. Wah he's very fierce, you think he's very young but wah. i saw him scold ****** (*** ***) so don't play a fool with the big guns here.

If you play the fool - and i know that maths teachers are taking up a lot of your time. I think there is an inefficient allocation of resources like market failure in economics - you are spending too little time on your econs!

Ok question 49, remember the one i did for you change in consumption must be mpc x change in disposable income must cut taxes by a larger amount because indirect measures will save some of the additional income. These are very important concepts which i have explained very very clearly. You must know how to calculate inflation rate... see DRQ/case study in CT 1. you definitely must know this. and if there is inflation, the general price level is rising. the cost of living goes up. even though your inflation rate goes down. Still an increase in the price level. cost of living is living expenses.

(*****: Mrs *** do we need to study the multiplier?)
Of course multiplier need to know if you don't know you die flat ok... money banking prices in - you know the production poossibiltiy slope is the same no international trade. Determination of exchange rate. demand for a countries currencies is a derived demand. Singapore off the Sars list, tourism increases, demand S$ thus appreciation of sing dollar.

Know what is meant by visible and invisible trade. Know measures to correct deficits. you see ah when you devalue your currency and in this case your goods are cheaper. therefore demand must be elastic. Supply must also be elastic. Need excess capacity to meet the increased demand. if don't have, then the price rises again and nullifies the effects of inflation. AND i will reccommend you strongly to do current papers. you can do it ok.

so are there any questions to ask me? let me ask you a question, how many of you have done your mcq until BOP? you CHAM ah. you better do for your a level exams. Don't play the fool ok... mcq is VERY important. Also ah, please relate your case studies to the given preamble. If you give bikini clad answers you will get bikini clad marks. i'm telling you... you go and write all the learn by heart lecture notes cannot pass you you understand or not? you understand or not? and you got to read carefully. I believe you will do well. Henry you have any quesitons to ask me?

(*****: Ya, you know the national income, what is the value added approach?)
--

The markets becoming bullish because the sars virus is being killed by the heat but it will come again in autumn. and if it really comes it will wipe away a lot of people to death.

The capital gains is the gains you receive from the sale of all this. its not included right... i just set to test your understanding... you understand or not... that's why you must be very careful. it will be applied to government departments. definitely... pls ah... government expenditure for national income... the G ah, the G ah, it excludes transfer payments don't anyhow write ah... pls ah... pls be very careful. i expct you to learn very well mr ******'s topic. if you spot ah... you are going to be in big hot soup.

*** ah... i will tie your hands if you don't stop... DING DING... are you scared or not? I think econs you should not be scared... you should be scared of your further maths... they always want to kill you know... me ah, i don't want to kill you, but some people... they just want to CHALLENGE you (referring to mr ******)... to death, no... to the highest of the mountain. You will see stars... and when stars come out of your head ah... you cannot think. Those questions i set... can come out one ah... those questions that we do ah... these are the questions that are likely to come out in the A LEVEL exams.
That's why that time i ask **** **** **** ah,... why you set this question they never lecture that question you know... how can you set a question like this and never inform us...at least you are smart and never do. but there are still some weirdos who go and try... Really weirdos. NEVER try a question that is not to your advantage.

this ** *****... pls ah... don't do things that require too many things inside. that's why i teach you ah... i will only do questions that don't require too much concepts. you're playing TOTO with the teachers if you want to try... you shouldn't play toto.

(***: Mrs ***, what is toto?)
you don't know toto? Aiyah gambling lah... the five numbers, six numbers.... that time i bought you know... the other time i bought i won one thousand dollars. that time i bought ah i went to Bulgaria. i'm very lucky. then i transited at... aiyah dunno where lah... then that place ah the number came out first prize. i bought one dress 480 dollars. the number came out. don't know why i so lucky i can touch. so all these things i bought free. my diamond brooch free. my dress also free. i issue that check to that company, wed or thursday... on Saturday my number came out exactly. Wah that stupid number first prize. my husband ask me why i so STUPID. even when i was young my savings box ah...my sister in law touch ah that number... then she win. the house i buy... true indeed, when i step in ah, came out second prize. sometimes i avail myself of the opportunity, but other times i just cannot lah.

The fortune teller sees my face and told me (Me: Mrs ***, why did you see a fortune teller?) Oh, I never go and see her. You see, because the manager that time I was working not here lah, we go out for lunch then I met her. When she sees my face she says january and may i will strike 4D. just happens this manager of IT, he very pantang, he always ask her. She says his office cannot have pillar, so there's no load on his head. i don't believe in all this ah. She says I'm very lucky. i don't believe in all this... but its still happening to me. i have this luck to touch all this kind of money. only i can touch this kind of money. if other people buy my number, cannot come out.

When i first came as HOD in rjc, first year suay ah never come out that handphones question. second year came out exactly. tell you ah, i can't believe it my tutorial question came out. 1999 also, that's why ******'s brother that year all very happy. i think the ah-curls (UCLES) examiners saw my question. You know why, because my friend she works in ministry, she came to my house and then she said, this question **** *****, very good ah, how come you can set this kind of question so good ah?? then i say i give you one copy, its ok. Then you see, that year, came out that question. (triumphant grin)

(***: Mrs *** they copied your question.)
No. UCLES examiners they cannot copy exactly, how can they copy? they MODIFY. only my students damn lucky ah, they all do damn well. the prelim questions came out. three questions out of four came out exactly in the A levels exams like in my dreams.

(***: what are your dreams like this year, Mrs ***?)
(cackles happily). Aiyah i don't know about this year yet. i never pray hard enough, never dream. aiyar. the ri people go and tell the teachers, there is one HOD in the school very good at spotting question. then the academic head come back and tell me, i very sheepish cos i know they are referring to me. this last year.. the question very tough. they are going to set the same. same question but they are going to rephrase it with a very long preamble. even case study minimum wage i told mr ****** to set, and lo and behold it came out ah.

in 1999, they set questions on low rates of inflation. you better take my advice you better read. i've done for you already. things i do ah, you all think i... i... i ... i don't want to see ah... i haven't taken my temperature. those from the heartland jcs ah they won't do well. you will do well... i got a good record ah.. you have to study to tango with me,. the lowest grade you will get is a C. ok so you need any help or not? Ok you can go now.

David contacted me yesterday, asking me if I wanted to go watch "Revelations" by The Necessary Stage, since someone wasn't able to go and they had an extra ticket.

"It can't be that bad, they've a reputation to uphold" - my favourite bard

I would have gone, just for the heck of it, since I get to stay out tonight (medical appointment) and I'd nothing better to do, but my former maths tuition teacher Mr Seow, uncle and auntie are over today for a Fish Head-Popiah dinner (party).

Besides which, I've long lost my faith in modern theatre being comprehensible and unpretentious, and the ticket was $20 (or was it $30?). And lucky for me too, for I just stumbled across this review by someone whom I had, for some reason, acted rather strangely towards in J2 and thus doesn't like me:

"revelations by the necessary stage was quite a letdown, horrid script. disjointed incomprehensible out-of-point ["on 28th january 1819 sir stamford raffles landed on st john's island.. constellations are starbursts of.. in 1992 singapore launched its courtesy campaign" one after another, all this while the actors had gay sex] after the first 20mins i caught no ball. at least the acting was superb. such a pity. until the end tkx and i just thought we weren't smart or artsy fartsy enough haha but that kinda changed when we were walking out and realised that
NO ONE understood the damn play. sheesh.

still at a loss at what local theatre is trying to prove. everything has to do with sex, deviant sex, homosexuality, abuse, violence, beauty=pain kinda thing.. at the expense of a solid storyline. which is a big fat pity cos the actors have talent.

but the worst part of the show has got to be the post-show feedback form:

if you could spread SARS to any of the characters, which would you choose? and if you were forced to rape one of your siblings at gunpoint, would you rape your brother, sister, or would you rather die?

so damn sick. like honestly, what the eff. that's not art. that's just in complete bad taste."

Somehow, I expected that :)

Dah!

Just finished Dragons of a Lost Star, book 2 in the War of Souls trilogy which Mr Ban Xiong lent me, while I lent him Magician and Silverthorn.

I come all this way, grimacing at the disturbing monotheistic undertones, and I find out that the "One God" is Takhisis!

Gah. I feel so cheated. Couldn't they have come up with something better?

He Who Must Not Be Named: "what do youwant, Morgion?"

Got a hit from this url: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/RJC22nd/message/1009. Don't tell me that they're still after me!


Less than a year to ORD!

10-minute non-study period (1839hrs - 1849 hrs)

I know what i want to do after exams! Watch arthouse flicks!
Nowhere in africa
Whale Rider
Balzac and the little chinese seamstress (i'm sure the title in mandarin isn't as icky as the translation)
the 25th hour
The crime of padre amaro
Mrs. Caldicot's Cabbage War
Russian Ark (G - 96m) ( Russian History/Fantasy)
gabriel you might like this one if it ever comes to singapore (film fest?) it's a fantasy-documentary on 300 yrs of russian history

Habla Con Ella (Talk to Her) (MA - 113m)(Spanish Drama)


The Quiet American (M - 101m) (Drama )

He Who Must Not Be Named:

"i have praised your merits as the owner of the largest private gamebook collection in SE Asia to a lot of people"

HAHAHA


Seems Kairen's intel is wrong. Lu Rui En was actually from Commerce. Oh well.


Gah! My third letter to the forum (on the ridiculousness of current copyright laws) didn't get published. I think I shall desist from further exercises in futility.


Shawn Ban quoting someone else (whom I'm not sure wants to be linked):

Something that struck me quite a while ago, but which I've never really gotten around to recording. Anyone who's read 1984 (the novel of the last century, if BBC is to be believed) may recall that one of the propaganda techniques used by the regime in the book was the perpetual state of war. Constant mobilisation against threat fuels nationalism, encourages people to rally behind the leadership, and makes the general population more receptive to restrictions on their liberties.

While actual military campaigns are obviously effective for this purpose, their financial and political expense (those are our boys out there, after all) do place limits on their use. What you really need is something that will bubble merrily just under the surface of the national consciousness for a protracted period of time. What you want is a sustained sense of urgency, an enemy no one can take issue with fighting, a danger that manages to consistently distort society's sense of normality.

War on terrorism, anyone? Or SARS?

Our Senior Medic isn't going for a course after all, so poor Ban Xiong's promotion to Local/3rd Sergeant was all in vain. All the runs at 5:45 am. Being favoured by the CSM. The arrows and saikang. The grumbles of the enlistees. The good mannered jibes. And no extra pay too. At least he hasn't had to pay for the using the facilities of the "wonderful" Midlink Mess, can conduct warmups and doesn't need to march.

I was sent outfield again this week, and we had only Muslim field rations (even though we've no Muslims!), but this time I was more prepared than the previous times. The day before I left, I went on a little shopping expedition to stock up, so in the end I ended up bringing outfield: an insulator of ice (for safety reasons, naturally), a jumbo loaf of bread, a small tin of Pork and Goose Pate (I'm probably one of a handful who have brought such food outfield), a can of luncheon meat, a can of tuna, a can of pork sausages (unconsumed), 2 chocolate bars (1 unconsumed), 4 cans of soft drinks (assorted) and assorted sweets. Bob suggested having chilled wine outfield, but I'm a teetotaller, so :) One officer's verdict: "Si beh well prepared". I still found it hard to summon up the mood to read when I was being bathed in dust, dying of the heat and assailed by hordes of mosquitoes, though.

I bought a $1 fly swatter (Made In China, naturally) in the shape of a frog for use in the Documentation Room. Apparently they've killed 2 flies so far.

I brought some Earl Gray teabags to camp. Mmm. I like Early Gray tea. Its flavour is so exotic, a level above ordinary teas'.

I put some popsicles in the pantry freezer and just under half got stolen. Bah! :(


We were looking at pets in Jurong Point one day, and I got the chance to examine luohan closely. The splotches on their scales are more detailed than I thought they were, but I still can't figure out what (if any) chinese words are supposed to be spelt out on the Luohans' bodies. I suppose it's like the Rorschach test, where you see what you -want- to see. Later, we went to look at pussies. All were lazy (most were sleeping) and arrogant, though, as cats are wont to be, but since the ones we saw were probably pedigree, they were much nicer to look at, with their soft, silky fur, than the strays my sister and brother in law customarily flirt with. Now -these- pussies you want to stroke, not those which scamper around rubbish dumps at night. I still prefer the doggies though. They were mostl lively and glad to see all of us.

I finished my second reading of Raymond E Feist's Silverthorn (joy!) recently, and am on Darkness at Sethanon now. It is sweet intoxication to tread upon familiar, intimate, well loved ground. At the same time, I get the nagging feeling that I should be looking at new material as well. Oh well, one can never finish reading everything, and what is the value of reading things that everyone else has read? As the anecdote one of those Chinese sages related went (and as I read in an AsiaPac Chinese Wisdom comic series), this scholar was walking around with one of those backpack book holder contraptions, and he was berated by an old man, who pointed out that what had been published was already known, so he should instead go out into the world and discover new ideas, whereupon he dumped his books and ran into the forest screaming in enlightenment. Or something like that.

Fabled Lands 6 - Lords of the Rising Sun was on auction at ebay, but the price was ridiculous (21 pounds or so 3 days before it ended). I'd have bid for it if one of the following were true: FL 5 was on offer too, it wasn't eventually going to be offered free online, the price wasn't so darn high and I hadn't lost much of my interest in gamebooks. At least I still have 1-4, bought at Popular Orchard MRT. I doubt they ever shipped 5 and 6 to Singapore. Pity 7-12 were never published.

There won't be Pork satay at the new Satay Club. Pity. Pork satay's the most succulent, fragrant and enticing of the lot.


Professor James Aho, Professor of Sociology at Idaho State University: "Every major world religion has people who have appropriated the label of their religion in order to legitimize their violence". That's not really true. How about Buddhism and Chinese traditional religions?

At this year's PUS (Pre-University Seminar), the students were instructed not to talk to the press "to allow organisers to balance the need to ensure that the activities at the event and interviewees' schedule are not unduly disrupted with the need to facilitate the media in covering the event and interviewing participants". Right. For some reason, though, getting a press officer to be around when the students are interviewed does not "disrupt" the schedule or activities, so their lie rings hollow. I am not very surprised, but I don't think they've ever been this compulsive about white washing their image before - they want to manage the event even down to that level, even though students, when interviewed at this manner of events, usually offer the usual boring platitudes. At least it's not as bad as Aceh, where you can't even quote GAM spokesman, so their "lies" won't cause confusion (as if spreading TNI's lies are any better).

Of the $15 billion that Dubya recently budgeted for the prevention of AIDS worldwide, a third of the money scheduled for prevention is to be channeled into promoting abstinence. What a wonderful way to prevent AIDS. In the same vein, I suggest that America combat Islamic Terrorism by shuttling money to Islamic Charities of dubitable repute to appease them. While they're at it, they might as well slash the defence budget drastically - unilaterally - to proclaim America's peaceful intentions so people won't feel threatened by the USA and will slash their own defence budgets. I am hard pressed to think of a more naive idea. Then again, these are the people who wanted to drill in the Artic National Wildlife Reserve.

ASEAN's response to the latest stunts of Burma's State "Peace" and "Development" Council is characteristically disappointing. "Internally we have to talk to our Myanmar colleague and find out what is going on" - Asean Secretary-General Ong Keng Yong (PM's former Press Secretary). A wonderful line, one that can be used in almost any situation. If the price of Black Market Burmese diamonds suddenly spikes, we'd also "have to talk to our Myanmar colleague and find out what is going on". So, as usual, we must "Bear in mind Myanmar is our member... you cannot go in and tell your family member you cannot do this, you cannot do that." I suppose we should keep mum if our family member rapes her (Ed: not a typo) six year old son, or if our family member beats her husband to a pulp daily, or if our family member murders someone. After all, it's his business, and we have no business interfering in his internal affairs. Perhaps people don't like exposing other's flaws because they fear that their own will come out into view as well.

Engagement is often trumpeted, but too often, it is but a cover for collusion. Even if engagement is tried, it seldom works and the target reaps all the benefits without having to keep up his side of the deal - just look how Kim Jong Il finagled everyone into providing him financial and food aid, while continuing work on his nuclear bombs. For more than a decade, ASEAN has tried "engaging" Myanmar, all to no avail. Because of "engagement" by China and ASEAN, EU and US trade sanctions aren't having much effect, and Than Shwe and friends can enjoy all their luxury goods.


Quotes:

[On fantasy books] My tastes are simple. [Me: Then you'll probably like David Eddings.] No, that one is too simple. The story has no depth at all. They just fight, fight, fight.

I can go outfield. 3 days, 2 nights. No problem. As long as it's not [with the] SAF.

Where are the officers? They're upstairs watching Miss Universe.

[On if I stand in as Senior Medic 2i/c] Then you [can] plan duty for both of us. One weekday [each].

[Me loudly: Ooi!] Why don't you just say "kannina"?

We have no First Sergeants in QM branch because they all either AWOL or go to DB before they become First Sergeants.

Frivolous thoughts on 'How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days':

This is a very good show to watch for girls to learn how to be screwed up. Geraldine should go and watch it, then she can drive Yechao mad. Love fern!

Unlike her mother, Kate Hudson doesn't seem to have a penchant for plastic surgery, since she obviously hasn't undergone the second most popular form of cosmetic surgery in America, which would be the most obvious sort that she would go for. Then again, she's half her mother's age, so. Despite not having undergone that form of surgery, though, it was very obvious she wasn't wearing nipple stickers for the grand ball. Sometimes I wonder why I notice these things.

Usually, in romantic comedies, the guy is the one who professes his stupidity at the end. Refreshingly, the girl did it this time. The guy still had to do the grand end-of-movie-chase, though. How tiresome and sexist.


Is the trailer for Ju On very funny? It's supposed to be a horror show, so how come everyone in the cinema laughed at the start of, and just after the trailer? I guess Singaporeans are inured to horror shows by now.

Is there this one guy in the USA whose job is to provide voiceovers for movie trailers? He seems to have a monopoly of the market.


Ooh. Very... unexpected flash.

What a dumb pussy cat

Asian Prince might not be looking for a princess anymore, but he still keeps a diary!


Ooo I remember this!

Title: Michael Jackson's Moonwalker
Author: Sega

"Magic: Go Figure. Well it�s his game, let him do what he wants. As long as you hold down the �Magic� button, Michael will spin, and knock back enemies near him. When you release the button, he will throw his hat, which will go out a certain distance, and come back like a boomerang. If his hat hits an enemy, they blow up (WTF!? It�s just a hat). The only enemy I�ve encountered that didn�t blow up is the zombie (Yeah, there are zombies). If you hold the �Magic� button long enough, Michael will break into dance, along with all the enemies on screen (Now I know why I found this game enjoyable). At the end of the dance, Michael strikes a pose, and yells out �OWWW!� and all the enemies die. He must be a damn good dancer. I know that doesn�t happen when I dance."

Ahh, the joy of all those (few) console games I played in Primary School at other's houses. Modern console games just don't have this kind of quaint charm, and have fallen prey to the same tendencies that have ensnared PC game developers.

Blogger seemed to have recovered from its outage and locking me out while I was watching the DVD rip of Bridget Jones's Diary.


Stuff from Thursday in Reverse Chronological Order:

Acne Be Gone - a gross and funny zit popping web game

I've been migrated to Dano. And it seems all my old posts have been deleted. Wth?!



I was pissed off with Blogger, so I went to support an RJ alumna by watching a certain Channel 5 drama.

Following in the grand tradition of Channel 5 dramas, it is bad. Only it's so bad, it's funny. There is a campy feel to much of the show, which feels deliberate (as does its bad quality). The extras have wooden acting. Actually, so do the 2 leads, but it's forgivable - indeed to be encouraged, even, since the characters have supposedly switched bodies. I suspect this is all an attempt to capitalise on the traditional 'strengths' of Channel 5 dramas!

I'm rather pissed off that I missed the first two episodes - the first because of my screwy VCR, and the second as Channel 5 inexplicably switched the time slot, so I know neither the premise of the show, nor how they ended up switching bodies (which is a pretty interesting concept for a local drama, actually).

After 3 night shifts at the Shangri-la in a room that smelled of fried onions in the morning, my system was at an all time low. My hands were shaking, my head spinning, my stomach churning and my speech slurred. Even now I still have a residual headache.

The piped music in Shangri-la is tuneful without being muzak-ish (I even heard a harpsichord one day), but there's only a certain amount of times you can stand hearing "The Blue Danube" in 3 nights.

The first night, they'd kept the tea by the time my shift started, but after some not-so-subtle hints to the manager, I was able to give myself a caffeine high the next two nights.

I saw a lot of MID license plates in the day, and contrary to many's assertions, most seemed to be White Mercedes and not White Audis. There were also a few silver and black ones. Bucking the trend, though, I saw 177 MID today, and it is concrete evidence that Singapore is trying to boost cross-strait ties - it's a Proton Wira!


Someone discovered that I didn't like my sides being touched or worse, poked. He then proceeded to tell more than a few people about my vulnerability, so now I am daily assaulted on all sides, putting me in mind of the Nanyang days when some person tried his "gu3 ji2 xin1 fa" (New Tickling Pattern/Skill) on me. Thus, I have been compelled - not wholly with regret - to dust off my dreaded obedience collar, after all the years since it has seen action, when I thought I'd never have to use it again.

It seems that, instead of letting the 46 SAR cookhouse do all the cooking, the 3 cookhouses in camp are alternating between themselves. This past week, it's been the 42 SAR cookhouse that's been doing the cooking and if anything, the food is worse than ever while one meat dish has been sneakily removed from the menu, so obscenities have been hurled all throughout Sungei Gedong, and the canteens have seen their already brisk trade boom.


I've been constantly irked by the ads that PrettiSlim has been taking out in the Straits Times, but those are not the worst of the lot. I was reading Her World's June Issue (which somehow had appeared in the Treatment Room) and PrettiSlim's ad was just... appaling. In no uncertain terms, it told all readers that men care only about your breasts, so you must enhance your breasts to continue to attract your man so he won't hit on your sister. Much has been made of ads which 'degrade' women and most of it is hot air, but this simply takes the cake.

Also seen in Her World - A bikini feature: "Be a Baywatch babe without burning a hole in your pocket". The most expensive set in there was $181.10, and most were at least $80. I guess some people have warped perceptions of relative prices.

Swensen's doesn't have Rum and Raisin Ice Cream anymore, to Ban Xiong's disappointment. I know why they don't serve pork, and even alcohol, but this abandonmnt of culinary principles in the quest for a questionable boost to the bottom line is ridiculous.

The culling of stray cats has raised a big hoohah among cat lovers. Why can't they simply take all the strays home? That would solve many of the problems that stray cats bring, wouldn't it? Then people wouldn't dirty the place by leaving food for them everywhere and not clearing up (unlike my sister), and the cats wouldn't trek the food everywhere.

Someone wrote in to the ST Forum complaining that people weren't respecting each other's religions, and were trying to convert others. He then urged them to 'respect' others' religions and not to try to convert others. However, isn't the very soul of many religions about proselytisation? If you truly believe in your religion, and believe that it is true, then you will try to let others see what you believe to be the light. Not to try to do so would in fact be immoral (looking at it from the point of view of the proselytisers). It's not as if anyone is trying to force anyone else to convert, at least in Singapore. In fact, it's been quite a while since someone ambushed me at an MRT station. But I am prepared! The next time anyone tries, I will be ready! Or maybe I should go on the offensive myself.


Quotes:

[On his days in a hotel] Then all the China girls don't wear [a] bra. In the female locker room. Wah. [mimes taking shirt off]

[Me: Someone said if he doesn't sign on, he'll become a toilet cleaner or road sweeper] He'll go and sell durians. (didn't, he'd have)

[On a regular if he didn't sign on] He'll suffer from low self-esteem. No one to shout at.

[On his SATS] 1600... 1601... I applied to a lot of universities. They didn't take me seriously.

[On using my belt loops to tie a trash bag to] This role suits you perfectly. The walking dustbin.

[On Saikang] That's why. Fuck, I'm an admin supervisor, not a saikang supervisor. [Throws broom to ground]

[On if Change Parade timings are including in the BUC rankings, and why they were cancelled] The CSMs will say - my unit can change parade in record time

I wonder why doctors aren't Halal

[Sign on bread] Please do not use your hand! Use the thongs provided (tongs)