Day 4 - Paris (3/4) - Louvre, Night train
supplemented with some of Jiekai's pictures in lieu of mine, which have been lost for eternity due to his cockitude. Many of the Louvre pictures can be googled.
Statue
One of the Louvre's policies that I strongly disagree with is how photography and videography are forbidden in the Apollo Wing and where the large format French/Italian paintings (maybe the largest paintings I've ever seen - I see what they mean by "large format") are kept (among others, the Mona Lisa). They claim that this is because this is the museum's busiest area, and that this is for the comfort of visitors. At least they have the decency to say that 35,000 works are on display on their website with photographs (I've a feeling they've a larger collection than that, but only have pictures of the more famous ones). Seeing idiots flashing away at a Botticelli fresco, I can't say that I didn't have sympathy for their policy, yet the proper thing to do would be to chide the idiots instead of depriving others of the enjoyment they'd paid so much for.
Assuming that the reason for the no-photography rule is that flash photography annoys people, what they (and all museums seeking to prevent flash photography) should do is to give each visitor (for a €10 deposit) 3 photography tokens which must be prominently displayed. Everytime a flash is seen, one token will be taken away by security personnel, but as long as at least 1 token is returned, the deposit can be claimed (let's not say that chances are not given). The threat of monetary sanctions should enforce photographic discipline on idiots. Of course, the fear of flash photography is not the only reason - Museums also want to sell more postcards. I understand then why photography is prohibited, but then although I understand why a cuckolded man might want to kill his erstwhile lover and her paramour, I do not necessarily agree with him.
There was a large crowd in front of the Mona Lisa, and I saw some people secretly videotaping the thing. Actually despite the mass of security personnel, it's possible to take a photo (even without doing it by brute force and snapping away until the fella comes to block your camera with his body) - there're just too many people in the crowd. Idiots, of course, flashed away and spoiled the market for the rest.
There were curiously few guards in the area where photography was disallowed - they only really strictly enforced the rule around the Mona Lisa. I was too tired and in too much pain to play hide and seek with the guards, though, and at first did not take any photographs despite what others around me did. However, seeing Jacques-Louis David's "The Sabines" revitalised me, making me forget my pain as it was too breathtaking and shiver-raising not to record for posterity.
*Jacques-Louis David - Les Sabines*
I can't see how taking a picture of this while sitting on a couch disturbed other museum visitors.
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Jacques-Louis David - Leonidas at Thermopylae*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Delacroix - Liberty leading the people*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Gentileschi - Le repos de la Sainte Famille en Egypte*
This is the first time I've seen the Virgin Mary breastfeeding.
Mine was better but it has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
Winged Victory at Samothrace
Mine was better but it has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Coloured Greek vases*
You don't usually see these.
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Face masks - maine-et-loire*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
There was an Islamic art exhibition in the Louvre. There, I found my first banner in English (the other signs in English just point to the toilet and such - nothing introduces collections in English). Why? Because the collection was on loan from the Met in New York. Hah!
*Armoure dite "Quatre Miroirs"*
17th-18th Century from Iran
This is quite splendid Islamic armour
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
I scoured the Islamic Art collection for depictions of the Prophet. Unfortunately, I couldn't find any. The closest I could find was a portrait of Fath Ali Shah from 1805.
*Portrait of Fath Ali Shah from 1805*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
However, since depictions of any living thing are strictly forbidden in Islam (that's why the Bamiyan Buddhas were blown up), fundamentalist terrorists do not need any excuse to blow up their Islamic art collection. Hell, the whole of the Louvre can be levelled. [Someone: what i had heard (but dont remember exactly) was that the prohibition on the depiction of the Prophet and his companions came quite a few years after his death. also re depictions of living creatures, the prohibition created quite a bit of confusion when western scholars accessed islamic treatises on botany and zoology. the islamic scholars understood the depictions to be fantasy, the ang mohs thought those were real plants, etc]
*15th century pirated statue*
How novel! [Ed: If I had the picture I'd know what my comment meant]
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Donatello - La Vierge et l'enfants*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
There was a "tactile gallery" where reproductions of some works were located for the blind to touch. There was also a book there - both in French and in Braille (but not in English). The Louvre caters to the blind more than English-speakers, hah!
I've never seen so many painted Medieval and Renaissance sculptures, I think, as in the Louvre.
*Souabe - Martyrdom of St Catherine*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Gregor Erhart - St Mary Magdalene*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
Walking through the pre-classical gallery, I started walking as fast as possible to avoid the Greece Cycladic figures. I stopped briefly at some 'pithos'es, but I'd already seen what Schliemann claimed was Nestor's drinking cup, so.
*Figure of man from the late Archaic period, 540bc*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
A few sections of the Louvre were closed (I wanted to see Coptic Egypt, damnit) but it was nowhere as bad as the Met. Again, the British Museum is the best.
*Canova - Psyche and Cupid*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
I was surprised to find Neo-Classical Egyptian sculptures. I thought they only confined themselves to Greek/Roman styles.
*Anneau dit "De Saint Denis"*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Grand Salon - Napoleon III's apartments*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
Napoleon III State Apartments
Napoleon III State Apartments
It takes virtually no skill to be a guard in a museum. This could be the solution to French unemployment, especially the 50% unemployment among Muslim youths! The only thing is that it's extremely boring, so it may not stop more riots when new labour laws are implemented.
*Le mois de mai - Les chasses de Maximilien*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
Breasts in painting and sculpture are almost always perfect. They never droop, sag or have funny shapes. At the very most they're too small.
Cock
I saw someone wearing very weird stockings - with silver lines running down them.
After the Louvre I went to try the famous Berthillon ice cream with Jiekai. It was mentioned in both our guidebooks as being excellent. He had honey nougat and I caramel, but for €2 (I paid €2.50 for a waffle cone) we were extremely disappointed. If nothing else, the scoops were tiny - even tinier than anything you'd get in Singapore. Also, the flavouring was not integrated with the ice cream itself but instead stood on its own; there was no creaminess at all. The ice cream also made us thirsty because it was too intense, delivering a big punch to our palettes instead of gently sliding in. Jiekai clams his most gorgeous and memorable dessert is George and Denvers' Cold apple crumble with ice cream opposite Christchurch College, Oxford.
Dinner. I had rabbit (background), he had lamb.
We then took the night train from Paris to Munich, from where we would transit to Vienna. I'd booked a bed in a 6-couchette - it turned out to be on the middle level, and it was an interesting experience (one might recall that "May you lead an interesting life" is a curse in some parts). A normal 6-seat compartment was converted into a sleeping area, with 3 bunks on either side of the door. A ladder afforded access to the middle and top levels, but since space was limited it was a bit like Tarzan maneuvering inside of a chimney. As you can imagine, there wasn't space on the couchette to do much more than wiggle my digits without hitting the couchette above. At least there was a little webbed pocket to my right for me to place my personal artefacts. The bunk wasn't even long enough for me - let alone for tall European men. I now know how our coolie forefathers used to live.
*Picture of me in the couchette*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
*Picture showing how squeezy all the couchettes are*
This picture has been lost for eternity due to Jiekai's cockitude
On the Eurail menu: "Time for a snack", "Wine for sweet dreams", "At the end of a long day" (drinks with 30-40% alcohol by volume)
Jiekai said that when he was on holiday he could talk freely, not needing to repress himself and shut up. I said that that was why it was not a holiday for me. I suggested he talk to the toilet bowl. He replied that the bowl wouldn't reply and insult him. I then resolved to ignore him but he said the best way to get him to shut up was to give him the blank, pissed, cold stare which girls give him when he annoys them. He then said in normal life he had to concentrate very hard to not be a cock. His lack of concentration on holiday, presumably, is what caused my memory card to disappear due to his cockitude.
Further to the point about quasi-private property - the Basilica of the Sacred Heart was built with public donations, so not allowing the public to take pictures when a service is not in progress is akin to collecting public donations to build the National Library in the 60s and then selling its bricks back to the public in the 00s (they can't say that photography is disrespectful, because they themselves sell postcards of the place in the shop).
The traffic lights in Paris are very weird. At many of them, when you press the button indicating a pedestrian has arrived and wants to cross the street, a French women starts repeating some line in French.
It seems in Europe taxes are always included in the menu prices. This is so much more convenient than trying to add 16% to the bill mentally.
French bread is generally so good you can even eat it on its own. Gardenia can go to hell.
Cock files:
- In the middle of a crowded Paris Metro train car he wanted to come up with derogatory names for people around the world. As I told him, "When I was younger people used to ignore me, and say, 'Do I know you?'"
- He kept charging ahead without making sure I was following
- When talking to people he often faces the opposite direction (like when charging ahead)
- He walked past Metro entrances on multiple occasions
- He didn't get off at the right Metro stop on multiple occasions
- "I know where I'm going". He then charged off for 13 minutes at a fast walk, and then claimed the restaurant had disappeared.
- "I know where I'm going" (multiple times)
- Not waiting for me to ask the conductor which day to write on the Eurail pass for the night train, he wrote the date he got on it (you have to write the next day's date)
- He almost cancelled his wrongly written date, but luckily I told him in time that this was considered fraud, and that he had to write a new date on the pass
