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Wednesday, June 23, 2010

老婆, 情人和红颜知己 (Wives, lovers and beautiful soulmates)

"Because we don't think about future generations, they will never forget us." - Henrik Tikkanen


From an article someone sent me (translation below):













What is a wife? One to whom you entrust the management of your savings and the upbringing of your children; what is a lover? One with whom you have secret rendezvous, terrified that your wife will bump into her; what is a beautiful soulmate? One with whom you will share secrets that are not for your wife or lover.

The wife is a form of bind on you, bounding you to not randomly ogle other women; the lover is a form of compensation, giving you what you want but cannot get from your wife; the beautiful soulmate is a form of instruction, rousing you from your stupor and plucking your heartstrings [Ed: There seems to be a form of wordplay here, as "点拨" means something different from "点" and "拨"].

The wife is the woman keeps you company in everyday life, the lover is the woman who eats, drinks and makes merry with you; the beautiful soulmate is the woman who chats with you and talks of matters close to your heart; very often the wife cannot replace the lover, because she doesn't have the lover's romance and soft warmth; at the same time, the lover cannot replace the wife, as she doesn't have the wife's affection and determination; neither the wife or the lover can replace the beautiful soulmate, because that is the most genuine desire of the soul.

The wife has no blood relationship with you, but will worry for your safety and health; the lover has no blood or family relationship with you, but will allow you to get the respect of being a man as well as letting you embody the charm of being a man; the beautiful soulmate has no other relationship with you yet, yet you will show her your most honest aspect and let her share both your joy and sorrow.

The wife is a cozy castle; the lover is a fruit of happiness [Ed: Alternatively, "pistachio"], who very often is cumbersome, but whom you will not jettison unless in extremis; the beautiful soulmate is the foundation of your vigour - losing her, you will not have the passion that you had in the past, you will feel lonely and lose your joie de vivre.

Some wives' care is like a glass of tap water, bland and tasteless; the lover's care is like strong liquor, easy to get drunk on; the beautiful soulmate's care is like coffee - both bitter and sweet, and invigorating.

When the wife leaves on a work trip for a week, you won't think of her; if you do not see your lover for 3 days you will be flustered. Your utmost desire will be to find your beautiful soulmate and pour out your feelings to her, telling her of your dismay with your wife, and your lover's shamelessness.

What enervates men most of all is their wife's nagging, their lover's tears, and their beautiful soulmate's misunderstanding. The wife's nagging makes the frustrated man even more frustrated; the lover's tears make a man's heart surge, rendering him incapable of making a decision. The beautiful soumate's misunderstanding sends a man's heart off the cliff, plummeting into the abyss.

The best wife is one in whom you find the lover and the beautiful soulmate, but this sort of woman is very hard to find. The best lover is the one who disappears with no other requests when your wife discovers your affair, but most lovers cannot do this. The best beautiful soulmate is one who can become a lover, or even a wife, one day, but this mindset rarely manifests.

If it's possible, everyone thinks of turning the beautiful soulmate into the lover; if even more is possible, turning her into the wife. Only - the beautiful soulmate who has turned into a wife will no longer be a soulmate, because very few men treat wives as soulmates.

One marries a wife because one is afraid of others' idle gossip; one finds a lover to spice up the blandness of everday life; one consorts with a beautiful soulmate to find some comfort for the emptiness of one's soul. What men are looking for all their lives is not a wife, nor even a lover, but a beautiful soulmate who is even more.

Ed: Some of the translation has been improved, and the final 2 paragraphs that were missing from the version that the person sent me have been added back.
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