***
An ode someone composed to the Asian Prince:
A picture speaks a thousand words,
disgusting though it may be,
His face looks like it was his rear,
his features make us hurl.
A bag he should wear, o'er his head,
his eyes should be poked out.
Facial features now on par,
with the ex king of pop.
***
ránathalion, a butterfly dreaming he is a fifteen-year-old boy, is amused by my last batch of search referrals.
Unfortunately, the latest batch is still in the oven baking. And by quoting my odd search referrals, he has sealed her doom, for now the guy/girl/entity who keeps searching for ways to masterbate with household items will get his page too!
***
Game Over Feint
You can type as your enemy is destroying your old town something like "Ok, you won, I'll just let you destroy my town." This trick often works but not against experienced players unless you catch them on a bad game. Often once someone thinks they have won, they stop building units and begin messing around. If you are building up a force of units in secret while they have pretty much stopped production and are using what they have already to hunt you down, you can build up a large enough force to launch a surprise attack on the enemy. In some games, such a force has turned the tide of the game and allowed the defeated player to win.
Typing "has left the game" puts a message such as "Yourname: has left the game." Most people don't notice the ":" or the color of the message which gives it away and actually believe you have left the game. It works on experienced players or whoever has not heard about this ancient trick. The official response to someone who has tried this on you is "nice try."
Ooh. Sneaky.
***
Despite efforts by the school admin to shut it down, it seems the Raffles Model United Nations Conference (RMUNC) is still alive and kicking. As usual, conspiracies abound:
Wired (the usual conspiracies in nation allocation)
RedM-i-x (some other irrelevant lines about Rmun)
***
Things You Would Never Know Without Indian Movies:
A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beatings but will wince when a woman tries to cleanse his wounds.
The hero cannot fall in love with the heroine (vice versa) unless they first perform a dance number in the rain.
Once applied, make-up is permanent, in rain or in any other situation.
Two lovers can be dancing in the field and suddenly, 100 people will appear from God-knows-where and join them in the dance.
In the final scene, the hero will discover that the bad guy whom he was up against was actually his brother and the maid who looked
after him was his mother and the chief inspector was his father and the Judge was his uncle and so forth.
Key English words used in the movie (usually said out loud between sentences) are "No Problem!", "My God!", "Get Out!", "Shut-up!",
"Impossible!", "Please forgive me!"
They drop down to the ground and roll and roll while singing and leap to their feet in different clothings.
They can run around the coconut trees, singing, battling eyelids and throwing glances at each other and change clothes all at the same
time without getting out of breath.
Things You Would Never Know Without Chinese Sword-Fighting Movies:
Being the hero's parents is always unlucky and will usually be killed by enemies when the hero is young and the hero will become an
orphan.
When a man is wounded and dying, he always manages to catch his breath and speak a few sentences to reveal the killer before
dropping his head and being declared dead.
Skilled people are able to fly over roof tops, up trees and across distances without any sweat. But when travelling to towns and
villages, they still have to walk or ride horses.
The heroes need not have to work for money, but will always have gold and silver with them to pay for their food dishes.
The heroes and villains will meet each other very often no matter how big the country is and no matter where they are.
Healing internal wounds in the body is as easy as sitting down cross-legged, palms on the knees and smoke coming out from the head.
They can keep alot of stuff in their sleeves and waistbands and never drop them. Especially a lot of gold & silver ingots.
***
Communist paranoia and hyperbole is so delusional, it is as amusing as it is sad:
'Beijing Froths at the Mouth
In the latest Time magazine (Asia), offers a generally balanced critique by Hong Kong's former Chief Secretary and most popular political figure, Anson Chan, of Beijing's response to the SAR's democratic aspiriations. An excerpt:
For the greater part of the past seven years, China's central government has largely left Hong Kong to govern itself. If we have not done a very good job of it, the blame cannot be laid at Beijing's door. Indeed, until recently, the standing and popularity of mainland leaders in the local community had steadily risen. But since the unexpectedly large turnout of demonstrators for democracy last July 1, Beijing's stance toward Hong Kong appears to have hardened. The central government has moved swiftly to lay down the law as far as the elections of the territory's Chief Executive and members of the Legislative Council are concerned. While Beijing has a constitutional right to do so, the manner in which the central government has handled this whole issue, coupled with its public rhetoric and posturing reminiscent of the Cultural Revolution, have left most Hong Kong people puzzled, hurt and frustrated.
If Chan expected mainland authorities to reflect upon her words, she must be disappointed. Beijing's response has instead been rabid.
China's Central Government Liaison Office immediately branded Chan's remarks "unfounded and irresponsible" and declared her comments a -- big surprise here -- threat to Hong Kong's "stability and prosperity."
Meanwhile, the official central government newspaper, China Daily, published a column by Xu Simin, a former standing member of the Chinese People's Political Consultative Conference, which unleashed a blistering attack upon Chan, accusing her of "distorting the truth to vilify Beijing". The newspaper further accused Chan of "smearing and attacking the central government" and of being a "pet of the British", "vehemently ambitious" the invisable leader of "a campaign to topple Mr. Tung" of having a "craven desire for power."
Still not finished, Xu declared that:
Chan's attack on and vilification of the central government are in violation of the facts as well as her own conscience. She is not qualified to represent Hong Kong people whom she was trying to mislead.
Chan's total disregard of facts when she tried to discredit Beijing has once again proven that she is only trying to gain fame for herself with her self-proclaimed title of "Hong Kong's conscience". She is not worthy of this reputation and it is now necessary to remove this pretence of hers.
The deeds of this so-called "Hong Kong conscience", who disregards facts and violates conscience, are like the classic story of Hua Pi in "Strange Tales from a Lonely Studio" - full of evil tricks.
The way she attacked and smeared the central government in its handling of the SARS outbreak was similar to what was practised in the "cultural revolution". The way she attempted to seize power was identical to that of the "Gang of Four".
Evil? Identical to the Gang of Four? Jesus, has someone hidden Xu's medication?
Finally, Xu suggested that, since Chan was receiving a retirement pension from the Hong Kong government, she was obligated to support
Beijing's policies and -- displaying the delightful sense of irony for which mainland official are famous -- accused her of having "no tolerance for different opinions."' (Source)
It's no wonder that the use of quotation marks is essential when quoting Communists: If I didn't know better, I'd attribute the overblown language to journalistic bias or translation errors.
This beats the time they called Annette Lu a "lunatic" and the "scum of the nation". But then, as she remarked, "It's quite an honour to be singled out in such an extensive propaganda".
***
What a girl doesn't want - "...hip-hugging jeans and skimpy tops, that's what, says one US teen who's pushing for 'modest fashion'... The US teenager doesn't want low-cut hip-huggers or skintight tops in her wardrobe. Yes, you are reading this right. Some teens DON'T want to bare it all, it seems, and Ella's taken the lead in protesting against what appears to be standard teen fashion these days. The shy, bespectacled teenager is making a stand for modest clothes instead of the saucy looks popularised by the likes of Britney Spears."
How refreshingly rare :)
Official Daniel Radcliffe Hatelisting: Young, rich, talentless and overrated - "Welcome to Talentless: the official hatelisting for Daniel Radcliffe, the most overrated talentless actor ever... Note: to all you Dan fans out there I really don't care how much you love him. So go join his fanlisting and get out. This is a listing for people who dislike him =P"
ROFL
Internet Porn Costs Irish Banker His Job: but was Mike Soden merely trying to cut stress? - "Instead of forcing executives to resign, and spending millions limiting and monitoring internet access and tightening firewalls, companies should think about allowing online access to hardcore pornography on a carefully-restricted basis: perhaps 20 minutes a day (10 in the morning, 10 in the afternoon). Employees would be able to pick their porn slots to suit their working day, and employers would be able to choose which websites were made accessible (perhaps by commissioning pornography for their company intranet). Productivity goes up, heart attacks go down, and no one gets fired for a silly indiscretion. Everyone's a winner."
I love British writing.
Top doc backs picking your nose and eating it - "Picking your nose and eating it is one of the best ways to stay healthy, according to a top Austrian doctor. Innsbruck-based lung specialist Prof Dr Friedrich Bischinger said people who pick their noses with their fingers were healthy, happier and probably better in tune with their bodies."
Wanking your way to weight loss - " A tubby 55-year-old writer named Koyamamyama, who tips the scales at 100 kilograms, had an even better idea. Deciding he might as well have some fun in the process, he headed for red-light districts around he capital... These efforts during a total of four hours of sexual activities came to 43,800 yen, consumption tax included. Did they help? Slightly. Koyamamyama's weight declined from 104.2 kilograms to 102.6. His muscle-to-fat ratio improved from 31.2 percent to 31.8; and his overall body fat ratio fell 0.8 percent."
... Manichi Daily News has really weird articles.
The Forge - Information on Medieval Arms and Armour
Costume-ConNections - Jap Cosplay sucks. Jap Cosplay all cannot make it. Singaporean Cosplay is worse - the costumes look like they are made of cardboard and tracing paper. Western Cosplay is *good*. Just look at what they've come up with (and in various categories - not just Anime characters)
Cows immune to BSE near reality
Really scary Friendster profile
Countdown to Legality - "Wanna know when you can touch them legally?"
There's a countdown timer to legality for each of the 5 people on the page. Not like anyone who tracks the page will ever be able to touch them - legally or not. As a related page remarks: "since they're so far out of your league that you'd have a better chance at getting struck by lightning while scoring the winning touchdown at the Superbowl, most of you are just hoping that they'll do some sort of spread in Playboy. ...which also, will not happen. Oh well, at least you can watch Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen in New York Minute, opening this Friday. ...if you're an idiot, that is."
