From September 21 2003's edition of The Beacon Journal:
"Burglary
A 38-year-old Cole Avenue man reported that his home was invaded on Sept. 9. The man said he was sitting home alone masturbating and watching a pornographic movie when a man came down into the basement, holding a gun, and started to videotape him. The man said that before he left, the intruder fed his dog some mushrooms and the dog died."
MFTTW: i think of you instinctively when i read such things
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