When you can't live without bananas

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Saturday, February 21, 2009

"There are three rules for writing the novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are." - W. Somerset Maugham

***

Me: Starhub's so broken in accessing Hotmail, I'm reading my mail through the office network (using remote access)

Someone: its not broken for jus hotmail
gmail is disgusting to use too

Me: well starhub's fine with facebook and twitter
and whatever else I'm accessing now

Someone: its ok for normal surfing

but bec gmail and hotmail use really innovative coding that require certain ports to be open for them to work properly

starhub closes these ports on the impression of limiting bit torrent users
and throttling bandwidth

Me: ironically my torrents usually run alright
well even my webdav hotmail downloading sucks

Someone: wierd


Me: UD #6 got screwed in paris

Frigid Girl: by whom

Me: BNP
the landlord
everyone

Frigid Girl: really?
wth?

Me: yah

Frigid Girl: WHAT?
WHAT?

Me: but that was paris

Frigid Girl: whyt
that's fucking ridiculous

Me: why
cos they're assholes

Frigid Girl: next she'll be fucking you

Me: hurr. hurr.

Frigid Girl: that's like... whoring around
whatever for

Me: err
do you know what BNP Is

Frigid Girl: no

i only saw 'landlord'
and i was like WTH

Me: BNP Paribas est un leader européen des services bancaires et financiers, avec une présence significative et en croissance aux Etats-Unis et des positions fortes en Asie. Le groupe possède l’un des plus grands réseaux internationaux, avec une présence dans plus de 85 pays et 173 200 collaborateurs : 132 700 en Europe, dont 19 400 en Italie et 64 200 en France et Dom Tom ; 15 200 en Amérique du Nord et 9 500 en Asie.

Frigid Girl: okay

i took 'fuck' to mean sex
cos it's you, gabriel
face it

Me: hello
I said 'screwed'

you're blind

Frigid Girl: oh yea
i used 'fuck'

sorry

hAhAHHA

Me: .........
honi soit qui mal y pense


Someone: '放して! 止めて! いたい!... そこ...?目... あたしの奥に... いく! いく!'

u could have parsed it in a text-to-speech translation tool....but then of coz it lacks e effect

u ask a gal to pronounce u'll get a slap haha

they should make a text-to-speech translation tool that enables users to choose "seiyu" mode...meaning high pitched anime-like voice


Cunning Linguist on the Real Doll torso:

now its all moldy and holey and disgusting cos i think too many people had the same idea as you (i.e squeezing it). we now know the muse of your breast implant project came from.


Someone: omg foucault..

i tell you
foucault is so repetitive

he taught in berkeley
HAHAHA

shit i want to kill
my readings

let me tell you my reading list
damn european

kant
derrida
descartes
rousseau
mill
marx
habermas
latour
adorno
spivak
zamyatin
hayles
the end

oh
nietzsche
heidegger
hooray

nietzsche was surprisingly easier

Me: nietzsche is ok. just depressing

Someone: marx is...

ya i like him eh
neitzsche i mean
like he makes sense

marx is full of shit
i mean the way he uses his words
very nice to hear
but sometimes doesnt make sense

oh we also read comte
french dude also

i should stop taking philo-like courses

***

Comments on my latest fantasy:

A: yes u r so ssssick haha
watched too much stuff from chikanland?


B: i'm beginning to feel very happily normal compared to you

Me: you very abnormal meh

B: at times when I feel self-consciously deviant (given my rather conservative nature), now I shall think of you and say, I'm more normal


C: you know those people hwo wears the kind of earrings that makes your ear lobes larger?
the ones with big holes

i always have an urge to poke my finger through and pull

D: and there I was thinking you were a gentle giant

my fantasy was to rip those large-hooped earrings out of the lobes


E: what's your problem lol

Me: do you even need to ask

E: yeah you're right
until you get laid
you will continue having the problem :P
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