"It's time for molecular trans-mutation" - William Cranston

***

The saying goes, "Until you're 18, everything blame MOE, until you 21, everything blame SAF, when you go uni, blame NUS/NTU, when you marry, blame HDB, LTA, when you retire, blame CPF and when you die, blame HPB..." (Alwyn)

He forgot to add: blame the PAP for everything, as a substantial portion of the populace is wont to do, even if it isn't their fault.

***

The following job listing from Magnamund Studios http://www.magnamund.com/ seems like it would be a dream job for a qualified Lone Wolf fan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lead Game Designer
Company: Magnamund Studios
Type: Full-time
Location: Paris, France
Date posted: 10/2/2004
We are immediately looking for a Lead Game Designer for our Lone Wolf Online(LWO) game.

Job description
The LWO Lead Game Designer will be responsible for designing a variety of features for the LWO game targeted at America, Asia and Europe. The Lead Game Designer will be involved in the design of all major game systems and have responsibility for several. The ideal individual must demonstrate solid game and UI design instincts, expertise in computer games, pen and paper RPGs and knowledge of the game design process. The
Lead Game Designer will create original concepts, and through the use of prototyping or mock-ups, help prove out the fun factor of an original concept. The position also requires an understanding of the overall game development process and requires a close working relationship work with engineering and production staff.

Qualifications
. Expertise of the Lone Wolf universe
. Enthusiastic gamer - essential
. Excellent written and verbal communication skills, innovative thinking
. Knowledge of online games or RPG computer games
. Keen interest in online gaming
. A wide degree of creativity and latitude is expected
. Must be able to work in a team as well as independently with schedules and reliable milestone delivery.
. Willingness to work hard to meet deadlines.

Magnamund Studios is based in central Paris, France. Relocation to his area is a requirement. Applicants must submit résumé to: cont-@magnamund.com
All materials are considered confidential.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Project Aon Announcements)


The website looks splendid. There're some screenshots up, a message from Joe Dever and even a "first look" trailer!

***

Two of the most splendid paragraphs in Lone Wolf (and indeed) gamebook history.

"You unsheathe the Sommerswerd and the shadowy chamber is flooded with blinding golden light, as if a sun had flared into being beneath its black dome. The steel walls vibrate, then buckle beneath an onslaught of pure energy that is radiating from the sword's blade. Until now the power of the the sun-sword has been held in check, locked and subdued within its divinely crafted blade. Even the surge of power that destroyed Darklord Zagarna at the walls of Holmgard was but a candle flicker compared to the searing radiance that is now pouring from its tip.

For an instant you see panic blaze madly in Gnaag's fly-like eyes, before he is consumed by the power of the Sommerswerd and vapourized to sightless atoms. With a cry of victory, you sheathe the sun-sword and stare at the place where, only seconds before, your arch-enemy confronted you."

(The Masters of Darkness, Section 214)


">The Gates of Horn and Ivory are a reference to James Branch Cabell's
>Figures of Earth, unless there is an earlier source.

Oh, there are a couple of earlier sources. :) A brief web search suggests that the best-known use of the gates is in the _Aeneid_ of Virgil (15 B.C.), but apparently the metaphor dates back to use by Plato in his Charmides (380 B.C.), and from there to the ancient Egyptians (goodness knows how long ago). I suspect these all pre-date Cabell by a fair bit."


Ooh. Touche.

***

One of the weird 27/30 year old women who keep asking me for authorisation on ICQ has messaged me!

Aglafera: Hi, where you were gone? I your school girlfriend, you do not remember me?

kimberly: huh?

Aglafera: You remember as we were hidden from parents at night and drank whisky?

kimberly: not really, no

Aglafera: ;(((


No, I do not have a 27 year old girlfriend from "e1u6" city whose company is located on "b1p0m8" street.

Meanwhile, another one keeps telling me that she is "Santa Clause" and sending me a URL that doesn't work.

***

ねとらん者トレカ　　第３弾　　Wo-Hen Nankan オークション[ビッダーズ] ("Netrunner characters, 3rd edition" (Trading Cards of Popular Net Personalities))

Name: Wo-hen Nankan!
Class: Virtual Idol

- the cards are protected by card sleeves
- the card itself costs 380Y, delivery is as that table
- it says nothing about overseas delivery

"Hi! I'm currently taking applications for people who want to be my girlfriend. I'm a really cool singer, people call me Asian Prince! be sure to send me mail!"

Note from Xephyris: "it loses a lot in translation"

***

Hilarious article from Funkygrad:

‘Wonders’ of Hall Life

"What is the primary motivating factor drawing young boys and girls out of their comfy homes and relocating themselves in 'Kent Ridge Hill' or 'Boon Lay Island'? The answer is plain simple - horniness.

If you are/have been a fellow hostelite, I can picture you nodding your head away. You have uprooted yourself to live in a miserable room, sometimes even having to share with a stranger, just because you have done the cost-benefit analysis of having barely-legal young girls fresh out of JC or young hot men fresh out of the military as your neighbours. Stop deluding yourself and agree with me.

I come from an infamous hall from NXX. To protect the 'innocent' as well as not to land my editors into any lawsuits, let me refer to my hall as Horny Hall. This hall was my first choice because according to my reliable sources, Horny Hall has a reputation -

'The girls are damn horny. Everyone sleeps around. Very happening!'.

Everyone knows that not just Horny Hall, but many other halls as well, have some sort of 'reputation'. I am sure you have come across news reports of students being evicted out of hostels due to 'undesirable behaviour' before. Sex among students in hostels is 'illegal' and if caught, be prepared to pack up and move back to your hometown. However, it is a well-known fact that despite these written rules, many students still commit their irrepressible deeds, albeit 'hush-hush' behind locked doors.

With the current pressure from our government to push up our falling birth rates and campaigns like 'Romancing Singapore', I believe these acts of passion would not only be business as usual but get even more vibrant. It is a pity that I got evicted. No, wait, I did not get to stay on simply because I did not have enough CCA points. Let me recount some of my observations of hostelites (not sexual) in Horny Hall. Here are the typical profiles with a 'horny index'. The 'horny index' is to given to measure how frequent they have sex during their stay in hostels:

1. The Jock (a.k.a soccer/rugby/basketball/swimming captain)
Horny Index: 8/10

He is an ex-commando with a keen sense of agility and exudes physical prowess. He is tall, tanned, muscular (need not always be) and good looking. You seldom see him in his room, but he can be located easily either at the football field or basketball court. Even if he is in his room, it will be locked, with a sign saying 'Do Not Disturb'. Chances are when you get to talk to him, he has another babe in his arms

2. The Netball Captain
Horny Index: 8/10

She is tall, lithe and tanned. No one ever fails to comment on her beautiful legs. She is too well-liked by everyone. Her fans are made up of both boys and girls who claim that they admire her superb netball techniques. Yeah right. When you do not see her around, she is probably in the jock's room.

3. The 'Exchange Student'
Horny Index: 8/10

Hailing from either Europe or the Americas, (s)he is so good-looking but you can only visit him/her in your dreams. If (s)he is not out partying, then (s)he will be travelling, probably in Koh Samui or Hong Kong. When you do see him/her around, (s)he will be with someone of the opposite sex, introducing him/her as 'hi, this is my friend'. And then off they disappear behind their locked doors.

4. The ASEAN Scholar
Horny Index: 7/10

Having worked so hard all their lives in India, China, Vietnam etc, these scholars lock themselves in their rooms all day long and most locals think they must be rushing next term's tutorials. However, it would not be uncommon to see a fellow scholar of the opposite sex knocking on his/her door with a laptop and humongous files at the most unearthly hours. Perhaps they have to discuss a project. But for the whole night? Hmmm.

5. The Village Bicycle (a.k.a the Slut)
Horny Index: 10/10

She can be pretty or otherwise. She is infamous famous. She has a large network of friends, and is found in every other guy's rooms, every day. Enough said.

6. The Casanova (a.k.a the Heart Breaker)
Horny Index: 9/10

He sings, dances and is active in sports. He has been involved in all committees, and all the girls love him because he is so eloquent and charismatic. Really?

7. The Xiaomei (a.k.a Innocent girl)
Horny Index: 9/10

Buy her sweets, biscuits or simply pack an extra take-away for her when she is rushing her assignment deadline. Tread softly into her room which is filled with Hello Kitties and Piyo Piyo soft toys. Approach her from behind and surprise her with the hot char kway teow you have got for her. She will swoon all over you, and you might want to start worrying about your girlfriend finding out.

8. The Invisible (a.k.a the Pervert)
Horny Index: 10/10

He is so mysterious and will never ever look into your eye. He only appears when you are either doing your laundry or having a bath. Now we know where all our undergarments have disappeared to.

The above are typical profiles of students across all halls in Singapore based on my personal observations, but this list is not exhaustive. Having spent 2 semesters in Horny Hall, I have experienced the 'wonders' of hall life and I am hungry for more. What are you waiting for then? Go apply for a hostel room too! (You can tell your parents that you get motion sickness travelling to school everyday, I am sure they would think it is better for your own good.)

Editor's note: We last heard from this writer that he has made it to the 346th person on Horny Hall's waiting list."

Someone in THMC: "girls arent horny. people dun sleep around
this article not very accurate lah. its doesnt mention lesbians"

Someone else: "e eviction is real. my neighnour got evicted..haha. a guy stayed in her room overnight...i dunno wad they did la...but was fined n evicted.."


The pictures of the Pimps at the SMU Sports Bash also induce guffaws.

***

Someone asked me to explain to her why I call NUS the Premier Institution of Social Engineering. Admittedly it's partially a cute term, coined to bring forth mirth, but I also get the feeling they're trying to socially engineer us. Some reasons:

- Rules which continuously change for no good reason, keeping us on our toes and adaptable, as well as helpless and resigned to whatever the government may decree from above
- Compulsory propaganda modules
- Ridiculous rules (eg dress code, no alcohol and dorm rules, especially the one abt the other gender) which, though mostly ignored, are still there. So people get accustomed to them, and people get evicted from dorms
- Grouping all the USP people together in PGP in the same few blocks (eugenics, of a sort)
- See the current blog picture for a poster put up somewhere in NUS
- The syllabus, system and cohort sizes are adjusted in accordance with societal (or rather governmental) needs and desires, rather than academic ones. ie University graduates are being turned out to suit the needs of society and the economy.

[Addendum on 30/04/2005: There's also loads of enforced interaction in the hostels, which acts as a form of matchmaking, which is why so many hostelites are attached to each other.]

[Ed: The last point was the reason why I originally called NUS "The Premier Institution of Social Engineering", but for a while I was debating whether to include it under "Economic Engineering" because this aspect doesn't engineer students socially but for society. But if we take a broad view of the term 'social engineering', this definitely counts.]

More points from those who have been in the Premier Institution of Social Engineering for a longer time than I are welcome.

***

Someone was so irked by the "True believers or moral absolutists?" Op-Ed in the ST by A/Prof Tan Seow Hon that she composed a 5 page reply, sent it in to the ST and PDF-ed it: Liberals need not be relativists

Her letters page is also interesting (and more comprehensible), with a prior letter responding to a column on Natural Law Theory (ie something is good because it is natural, something is bad because it is unnatural) by (surprise surprise) Associate Professor Tan Seow Hon.

***

Free will : the compatibilist solution

"Anti-compatibilism commits the fallacy of composition. The fallacy of composition occurs when one assumes that an attribute of a part is necessarily an attribute of the whole. In this case, we all agree that atoms do not have free will. This is to be expected since they do not have minds.

However, that atoms behave in a deterministic manner does not logically entail that brains do. In this case, behaviour is not the kind of attribute that we can expect to be transferred to the whole. Therefore, anti-compatibilism is logically flawed as well.

This solution may seem to reduce free will to an illusion. But this is a misunderstanding of evolution. Like any other function of the brain, free will has evolved to fulfill a function - in this case, mental flexibility.

[...]

The problem which leads to the misunderstanding about compatibilism hinges around the diaphanous model of perception (DMP)...

The facts of reality that lead to the DMP can be expressed thusly :

* From the first-person perspective, all we perceive of the perceptual process is our awareness of the object. We do not perceive the mechanical processes which lead to that awareness.
* From the third-person perspective, all we perceive of the perceptual process in the other fellow, is the mechanical processes which lead to his awareness. We do not (and cannot) directly perceive his awareness of the object.

The DMP itself is a disconnected, two-tiered view of the perceptual process. On the one hand, we are aware that this process has an identity : but on the other hand, our awareness of objects seems automatic. This leads to most false theories of perception, including representationalism.

How does this apply to the MD/free will paradox ? The application lies in the fact that the DMP applies to all objects, including our volition. Following the distinction above mutatis mutandis, we obtain :

* From the first-person perspective, all we perceive of the process of volition is our volition itself. We do not perceive the mechanical processes which lead to volition.
* From the third-person perspective, all we perceive of the process of volition in the other fellow, is the mechanical process which leads to his volition. We do not directly perceive his own volition.

And this is why the compatibility of MD and free will seems paradoxal. But this is only illusion."

I don't *quite* agree.


The immorality of theodicies

"Formalization of [the] argument:

1. There is evil/suffering.
2. A god is morally righteous/omnibenevolent. 3. Either :
(a) A god can create a universe without evil/suffering.
(b) There is an explanation for all evil/suffering. (with a theodicy)
(c) There is no explanation for some evil/suffering.
4. If (a) or (c) is true, then there is no god. This point represents the usual Problems of Evil.
5. If (b) is true, then all evil/suffering is justified.
6. If (b) is true, then all human evil is justified. (from 5)
7. If all our actions can be justified, then there is no more morality. We can rationalize the worst crimes.
8. If (b) is true, then there is no morality. (from 6 and 7)

If this is true, then any action, including mass murder and torture, can be justified by the believer. Furthermore, his own moral system is revealed to be a farce. Whether the believer has a theodicy or not, his belief is contradicted."

***

FunTrivia's Most Esoteric Quizzes

Some fun ones to try:

- Plants in the Family Ancardiaceae!
Poison ivy and other plants in the family Ancardiaceae.

- Synergetics- The Geometry of Buckminster Fuller
Prepare to be dazzled!

- Things Found In and About Belly Buttons
Everyone, at some time or another, has found something in their button. If you are one of these intriguing individuals, then take this quiz so you will not be alone!

- The Bowels of History
Here is a quiz on some notably gruesome and often scatalogical Historical facts. Test your knowledge on a few items not often mentioned in History class.

- Tardigrades: The Living Gummy Bears
Tardigrades are microscopic creatures believed to be halfway between nematodes and arthropods. Also known as "waterbears" or "moss piglets", I find them absolutely intriguing! I hope this quiz sparks an interest in tardigrades for you.

***

Origins of cursing

Swearing often reflects specific beliefs and experiences of a society

As long as there are Chinese people, tamade will exist, as it is used as frequently as the most popular greetings in the language.

By Lu Chang, Shanghai Star. 2002-06-20


THE most respected author in 20th century China, Lu Xun, once titled one of his articles with a term of abuse tamade (Fxxx his mother's ...), a very popular Chinese curse.

He humorously said that as long as there are Chinese people, tamade will exist, as it is used as frequently as the most popular greetings in the language.

Sexism and curse words

Chinese people choose a person's mother as a target for assault more often than the person they want to curse.

"The origin of this phenomenon reflects the sexism of a male-dominant society," said Hao Mingjian, a professor and editor-in-chief at Shanghai Culture Publishing House. "The person who first invented this abuse must have been a man who vented his wrath on women of a lower grade in the community."

The phrase tamade has a long history, and there is no reliable record of its origin.

Ancient books have the earliest records of ancient Chinese insults such as "you are a slave or dog", and the most serious one was "your mother is a servant".

It is estimated that the custom of attacking people's ancestors as an insult began during the Jin Dynasty (265-420) when the hereditary system prevailed.

Social stratification

Common people could never rise to a higher social strata even if they had excellent talent.

On the other hand, aristocrats led a luxurious life even if they were totally fools.

This unfair phenomenon irritated civilians, so they began to vent on their foes, that is, insult the forefathers of the noble class.

Insulting someone's forefathers was the biggest outrage to an aristocrat.

Among a person's ancestors, a person's mother was the first considered for attack.

At the very beginning, this idea was invented by learned people who used elegant words, but as the custom spread to civilians, the phrases took on graceless dirty words similar to the English "fxxx your mother's ...".

"To avoid too direct an assault on a person, people changed 'your mother' to 'his mother', and left out 'fxxx' and the rest of the dirty words to show his own grace," Hao said.

Thus, tamade took its final shape used since the early 20th century.

Men invented the abuse and they were the ones who used it the most. With a tamade, a man offended the mother of a person he hated and meanwhile seemed to become one generation older than the person.

"It's a wise tactic," Hao said.

This popular abuse has taken on different purposes, expressing surprise and even happiness.

Social contradictions

Hao believes that abuses actually reflect social contradictions. The proliferation of the term tamade may be attributed to the chaotic "culture revolution" (1966-76) when people were quick to hurl abuse at each other.

During those 10 years, trust and other niceness were destroyed. Hostility among people was accelerated and swearing became a kind of weapon.

"Everything went to extremes and people chose the worst words to attack others," Hao said.

Tamade was the most popular one.

Till the 1990s, swearing was widely advocated in literary works. People at that time thought writers should remove their masks to expose the original aspects of human beings.

"Restrictions of morality has loosen and description of human's original desire and dirty words could easily be found in literary works, which was a social tragedy," Hao said.

Tamade, of course, were used most frequently. Now, people used it on Internet with the abbreviation TMD.

***

Someone: is the video safe to watch with the door open?

Me: yes it is

Friend: i was kinda hoping it'd be the unsafe kind

Me: you want porn ah?
there's so much to download out there

Friend: yeah
but porn that friends recommend, that's different - that's QUALITY porn

***

Friendly Email Address - "Welcome to the world of Friendly Email Address (FEA). FEA provides you an alternative email address to your existing email address (e.g. eng12345@nus.edu.sg or u0412345@nus.edu.sg). The FEA allows easy association with yourself rather than the current numbers. It will be derived from your name. E.g. johnlim@nus.edu.sg or khtan@nus.edu.sg."
I can't get gssq@nus.edu.sg, only gss@nus.edu.sg. Bah. I shall remain behind the cloak of anonymity that my matriculation number affords me. Muahaha.

Hollywood Studios Costumes - They have togas and "pimp daddies and hoochie mamas" costumes!

Singapore Cosplay Club - OMG. [Ed: This is a "OMG I want to dig out my eyes and run away screaming", not a "OMG tis r0ckz".]

DustinDiamond.com - "YOU MAY HAVE SEEN ME IN HIT TV SHOWS SUCHS AS "SAVED BY THE BELl" WHERE HE PLAYED THE CRAZY CHARACHTER "SCHREECH". YOU MAY BE ASKING YOURSELF HOW YOU CAN GET INTO ACTING, WELL COMING THIS FALL I WILL TELL YOU ALL HOW YOU TOO CAN BECAME A FAMOUS SUPERSTAR AND SEX SYMBOL LIKE ME!"
Gotta love the cheesy midi.

Hostettler mounting campaign to change the name of Interstate 69 - Honi soit qui mal y pense.

The shocking truth about the FCC: Censorship by the tyranny of the few - "The latest big fine by the FCC against a TV network -- a record $1.2 million against Fox for its "sexually suggestive" Married by America -- was brought about by a mere three people who actually composed letters of complaint. Yes, just three people."

Why Religious Voters May Be More Inclusive than Seculars - "The religious voter, who is by moral training well accustomed to separating his own personal valuations and priorities from those of God, and is thus habitually "double" already, may be a better voter and citizen than the purely "single" secular voter who has no theoretical basis for dividing his view of the world from that of the larger community."
Unfortunately for his argument, the religious voter is *supposed* to pattern his personal valuations and priorities on those of his god. Secular voters, on the other hand, are cognizant of the fact that there is no god-given truth to force everyone else to accept.

Xeno Boy is back. Whee. It would indeed have been a pity to see "Singapore's first political blog" sink into the ocean after a mere 6 days.