20/4 - Malia, Panagia Kera, Lato, Spinalonga, Moni Toplou
This day we visited Malia. Considering that it was the third biggest Minoan palace in Crete, the lack of information was glaring - all we got were panels naming each location, and maps at each of the two magazine areas.
Malia crypt
Malia
My guide - he guided me through the ruins, often loping ahead of me to tell me where to go to next
Silos
After Malia we went to Panagia Kera - the church with the best-preserved Byzantine frescoes in Crete. There was a fresco of a nude Christ with hidden/missing genitals. Uhh. I guessed correctly that the frescoes were from the late Byzantine period (13th century) - they weren't as rigid as the early ones.
Photography was forbidden inside, and naturally postcards were on sale for €0,50 in the shop outside. I never expected the Ministry of Culture to stoop so low.
Stuff
I love the way it brazenly proclaims "Tourist Kiosk", that it has a "Free Toilet", that they sell "Traditional Stuff" and how they advertise their wares so graphically.
Donkey postcard - United Colours of Donkeys
Olive oil book
"The secret of good health. Olive Oil; Advice on its correct use, Under the Auspices of the Greek Academy of Taste"
No, my palette has not changed.
Next, we went to Lato. There was a grand total of one sign here - a map in the centre of the place. As such I have no idea what I was taking photos of and have given the pictures uninformative captions.
Blue bear in a field of flowers
Flower field
Flowers
View from Lato
View from the top, which I'd scaled (stupidly in sandals)
View of centre
Other side
Room
Other room
Path
Steps
View from Lato carpark
The next stop was Spinalonga - formerly a Venetian and Ottoman fortress, and then the last leper colony in Europe. We took the exorbitant ferry from Elounda (€10 return for a ~30 min boat ride).
Spinalonga
View of the clear sea
Buildings
Main gate
Buildings past the Venetian cistern
Path around the island
The sea
Scaramella Semibastion, 15th-17th century
Mezzaluna Mocenisa or Barbariga
Inside the Barbariga
Spinalonga
The butcher was amused that we wanted to take pictures of this, but the furry boots that the rabbit retains are cute.
Next we visited the Moni Toplou monastery.
Moni Toplou courtyard. The black stone in the second picture is a Roman dedication stone, IIRC.
Warrior monks - they really hate the Turks
This was hilarious (and I can't attribute it just to translational artefacts). They're great at turning the other cheek - the room where this was located ("Room of historical precious souvenirs of struggles for freedom") had weapons in it, as well as "the banner of Holy Monastery of Toplou used in liberating armed struggles against Turks" (aka "Standard of the Cretan Rebellion, uprising carried out by ignorant and ungrateful cretins" - as the Turks would have it).
Photography was forbidden in this room, but I broke the letter of the law while adhering to its spirit, which after all is what matters.
"The holy monastery of Kyria Akrotiriani-Toplou... was the center of national wars and a place where spiritual guidance was given. The monks were not frightened and did not submit to the many conquerors. They remained strong amidst the struggles and the sacrifices. They kept vigil and prayed waiting patiently day and night for freedom. The monastery took its name "Toplou" during the Turkish-occupation because it had in its possession a small machine gun [Ed: Sure beats a mace!] to protect itself from the enemies of the faith and the country... the national struggle started and, at this brave corner of the Cretan space, the soldiers of Christ became the soldiers of the country. The monks took on their weapons again, and the scented breeze of the Cretan land along with the Cross caressed softly the "gyataphani" (sword) and the "karyophili" (gun)... Finally, in 1898, 1912 and 1940, the monastery of Toplou fought and offered many services to the national cause. Today, the monastery contributes to acts of peace [Ed: Emphasis mine]"
Moni Toplou was quite nice (even aside from the hilarity of the scented breeze of the Cretan land), so naturally enough it was disparaged by the guidebook. I don't see the authors' problem - basically they disparage the good and popular sites, while hyping up shit in the middle of nowhere. Perhaps they'd say of the Acropolis, "horribly overrated".
The first Chinese restaurant I saw in Greece outside of Athens was in a town on the south coast of Crete where we stayed the night. Interestingly, it had no sign in Greek. Someone says that Greeks, like Italians, only know how to eat their own country's food. This is probably why almost all restaurants are Greek restaurants, and it is hard to find non-Greek food (though there are a few pizzerias, and some joints serve English breakfasts, pizza, pasta and schnitzel, and someone found 3 Chinese restaurants in Chania).
Crete receives a lot of French and German tourists - you hear those languages being spoken and menus and signs are often in those languages as well as Greek and English. You don't get this on the mainland, for some reason. It must be the beaches, though somehow I don't find them impressive - East Coast park with its (probably) Indonesian sand has spoiled me for others.
Crete and Greece in general are more english friendly than Paris (France is the #1 tourist destination in the world). Hah! Not only are almost all road signs in English as well as Greek, most people can speak at least some English and when you dial a wrong number you're told in English as well as Greek that this has happened. It's partially because of the Olympics but definitely that's not the only reason (not least because Crete is English-friendly as well). The fact that English movies and TV shows are not dubbed here can't hurt (but then, even in Germany where they are dubbed, more people can speak English than in Paris). My brother-in-law says the way to get the French to speak English is to talk to them in bad French (eg From the guidebook).
My brother-in-law wondered what would happen if the 3 of us went on the Amazing Race. I said we'd definitely lose since someone wouldn't pull her weight (besides sleeping in the front and not getting out to ask for directions [despite being the best person to do so, knowing the most languages and me the least] or check signs [even when she was the only one in the car besides the driver], she also refused to ask people questions she wanted asked, or even to answer the question of why she was so lazy), adding that it's lucky we weren't on Survivor, since she'd be the first one voted off the island.
