Friday, March 10, 2006

Amsterdam, March 2006 (Part 1)

On Tuesday, I finally went to Amsterdam.

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Canal - Nieuwe Prinsen Gracht

I bought a McKroket for €1. That's cheaper than krokets themselves in some places. However, when I went to the toilet I got pissed off because there was someone stationed there who said I had to pay €0.30, despite my obviously being a paid customer. Wretched country. Hell, I wonder if the toilet fees even cover the costs of stationing someone there (in Maastricht the bugger was probably off partying at the Carnival). I was so pisssed, I was tempted to piss in the streets. Come to think of it, maybe that's what all those security cameras are for (later when I was wandering around, I saw this guy move suspiciously towards a stoop (A small staircase leading to the entrance of a house), crotch first, but when he saw me he beat a hasty retreat).
Someone: "the problem with [mid to northern] europe is that you keep paying for public toilets! dont they figure out that most ppl will resent paying and want to vandalise the loo instead?"

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Windmill plopped in the middle of nowhere - photo bait for stupid tourists

I spent 2 hours enjoying the bustle of the city and wandering the streets; taking in the "Real" Amsterdam, not bothering to do the cliched touristy thing and rushing for Madame Tussads or some other commercialised tourist attraction. In other words, due to a combination of sleepiness and hunger (I had only a bit of leftover spaghetti for breakfast), I couldn't find the VVV, went in a circle, bought a map in a shop, foolishly decided to head halfway across Amsterdam to the Rijksmuseum but ended up going in the opposite direction and emerging further from it than when I'd started.

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Canal near the Anne Frank house

After I fortified myself with lunch, I got my bearings and located the nearest attraction, which happened to be the Nederlands Scheepvaartmuseum (Maritime Museum, housed in a formal naval depot). On my housemate's advice, I bought a Museumkaart, valid for free entry to more than 400 museums in the country, for €17.45.

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Cannon in the Museum square

The naval depot was established in 1656, and is more than 30 years old. They were celebrating their anniversary, and there was an exhibition about the history of the museum. Just outside the exhibition room, the Dutch penchant for amusing phrasing was clearly visible: "After years of faithful service, major renovations are now in order. But first, it's time for the 350th Anniversary!"

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Royal Barge - Neptune and 2 Tritons on the bow

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Royal Barge - 2 female messengers of Jupiter on the stern

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View from the deck of the VOC Amsterdam (replica of the original built by 400 volunteers)

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VOC Amsterdam - Stitch.
I was afraid my stitching software wouldn't be up to the job, since there's a man who moves position in the first 2 source photos, but it didn't let me down:
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Once I went back indoors, most of the exhibits had a soporific effect on me. Either there was a lack of oxygen in the building, the English translations of the Dutch captions were too sparse to interest me much, or I've experiencing diminishing marginal utility of consumption from museum visits, specifically maritime ones.

There was this art exhibition featuring paintings inspired by the museum's exhibits. Amid all the kindergarten drawings of blocky figures, this was my favourite:

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Robert-Jan Blietz - Groot Rood (Big Red), on acrylic

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"Art involves more than an aesthetic perspective. Personal terms like 'beautiful' and 'ugly' should never be decisive when evaluating works of art... Their work is pure and original, not encumbered by an academic art education or elitist ideas."

And of course there was a Politically Correct blurb about how one should not - can not judge art. Those who actually bothered to read the blurb above would notice that the exhibition featured works by mentally disabled people. This does not change my evaluation of the works: I choose not to insult the artists by being condescending and applying a radically different standard from one I'd apply to works by normal people. [visceral: "I do not exclude my gay friends from the subject of my jokes, because they know I treat people of all sexual orientations equally and dont put any of them on pedestals"]

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"It is a little dark around the objects that tell the story. This is not meant to give you the creeps but because bright light may damage these valuable items."
More delightful Dutch phrasing

There was this exhibiton (aimed more at children) about how the Dutch discovered the world, and there were surprising artefacts such as a polar bear pelt (the fur was remarkably soft) and a beaver pelt (the polar bear's was nicer though); just wait till PETA hears of this. I also suspect something went wrong in the translation for some parts, namely where they were describing people's lives: the entry for this famous person who led a trapped crew on a trek across ice when their ship was stuck in ice went: "Career: *what the person did*, Danger: *some danger the person did*, Hard Decision: *to trek across the ice or something*, Action: *I forget*, Sad: *the person died*". Not quite Engrish, but not quite there either.

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Scheepvaartmuseum - Stitch

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After buying my Eurail pass (there goes €345), I went to the Anne Frank house. The mercenary bastards allow no student korting (discount), do not accept the Museumkaart and don't allow photos. They had a cute way of saying that they didn't accept Diners and American Express, though - they displayed the signs you usually see when those cards are accepted, but with a big red cross over them.

"In order to preserve the diary it is not allowed to take photos" - presumably idiots are making the world a worse place for everyone else. But still, this doesn't justify a video ban. The best solution to this problem I've yet seen is still the place in England which required you to sign an underaking saying you would not use your flash. Perhaps a more advanced version of this would be to have visitors who wish to take photos pay a deposit, refundable if you are not seen taking any photos with flash. And the ultimate statement these organizations could make about customer service and giving them what they paid for while protecting their attractions would be to offer pictures for download on their websites, perhaps restricted with a password available only to paid visitors. But then they all want to sell their postcards, catalogues and such, so visitors will never get what they paid for.

There was an interesting section in the exhibition where a point was made about Holocaust Denial, and how Neo-Nazis dispute the authenticity of the diary because it forms part of the documentation of the Holocaust.

At the end, there was a "Free2choose" interactive multimedia presentation, where various scenarios were presented to the audience and they'd vote on how they felt. For example, whether the NDP in Germany (a right-wing extremist party) should have the right to demonstrate in front of a synagogue (I voted 'Nee', for the same reason that someone has the right to get upset when two gays are having sex in his bedroom after he has told them not to do so and the khalwat squad is 2 minutes away); whether citizens' information should be stored in a nationwide database - 1/4 of the citizens of Yokohama, in accordance with their Asian Values, refused to supply their information to 'Yukinet', and one transvestite commented: "What my gender is is my own business. I don't see why anybody else should know"; and whether police officers should have to wear the standard headgear despite their religion (with a look at Sikhs in Britain). The results for the current session and the all-time summary of visitors' responses were then displayed. I think the system was buggy though, for when there were only 4 people in the hall and only 2 of us voted, the system claimed 33% had voted no to the proposition.

At the end of the exhibition was a quote from Otto Frank: "It is not only important for people to come to the Anne Frank House to see the Secret Annex... They must be inspired to realize that people are still persecuted because of race, religion and political ideas." I wonder if he ever considered what should be done if people are persecuted because of political ideas in the name of protecting race and/or religion.

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Front of Anne Frank House

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I saw a Church of Scientology in Amsterdam!

I saw a male mannikin without shorts. Ooh, no wonder the city has such a reputation for decadence.

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Swan

In the city centre of Amsterdam, every street has 2-3 coffeeshops - they must be getting rich fleecing all those tourists. Those in Utrecht are a lot more discreet.

There are quite a lot of people living in boats moored in the canals. I saw (lit.) how they get power and water, but I wonder about sanitation.

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There are cruises through the red light district. Wth.

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Believe it or not - this is a conference centre (along Singel).

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Zool cafe - Cheap marketing tricks
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