"A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic." - George Bernard Shaw
***
Someone: "當你對一個女人說你愛她的時候，她就是你的責任了。"
Me: "如果她不爱你，惨了"
To remember: OKT : Orh Kui Tao (Tortoise Head)
If your surname is Foo you shouldn't call yourself Sam
"男人不长女 人不 爽" - This is a new one
Annoyed by people who claim that Singapore Fried Noodles doesn't exist in Singapore.
We've had Fanta Orange in Singapore for a while, but when is Lemon coming? But I think F&N Orange [Crush] got canned...
"nasi padang aunties have awesome mathematics leh. you can order the same thing on different days and pay different amts."
NB: People from different demographic groups pay differently, too
Amused that so many SG girls like ramen. Making up for Yong Tau Fu and fish soup?
RT @nommmsta Def not ladyironchef. Word of mouth is best RT @IS_magazine: Besides I-S, who or what do you turn to for reliable restaurant reviews? Pls RT
Amused at typical Singaporean female wedding shots as profile photos. Is it not customary for Singaporean women to change their profile photos to a wedding shot, typically of them looking demurely downwards with an enigmatic smile on their faces?
"Watched 30 seconds of the 9pm Ch 8 drama and already saw more state propaganda on it than a WWII film
Joanne Peh: OMGOMGOMG SO HAPPY WE FINALLY GOT A FLAT, WE ARE GOING TO BE MARRIED
Pierre Png: DAD AND MOM, DUN WORRY, YOU'RE GOING TO COME LIVE WITH US UNDER ONE ROOF LIKE A HAPPY FAMILY
Joanne Peh: CAN'T BELIEVE WE ARE SO LUCKY WE BALLOTED A GOOD FLAT"
Amused that there used to be Tampenis Roads in Singapore.
Amused that the Asia Paranormal Investigators is involved in Bukit Brown preservation.
In Singapore religions are protected from everything. Except the state.
A vice-chairman is not the same as a vice chairman (punctuation is important!)
A Compelling Preposition must really turn grammar nazis on
Wondering how many British English snobs pick on the "American" pronunciation of "mass" (basically "mahs" is a variant UK pronunciation but "mehs" is an acceptible UK pronunciation too. Also mass (as in kg) cannot be pronounced "mahs")
"If you really need my attention, please send me a mobile text and I may get back to you. Have a nice day"
Someone: best one i've seen reads "i am sick. i am not in the office."
Is it so hard to check your email before calling me for an update about something I've already finished?
Malaysia tourism slogan: "revisit the glory of a different time". So now the country's shit.
""looking for a real man" or "gentleman". This simply means she wants you to pay for everything and take care of her"
RT @jennyteo: Problem with paying ministers millions of dollars: they'll never understand how "average" Singaporeans struggle to deal with inflation.
RT: @BB_See: In Singapore, you have to be 16 to have sex, be 18 to get paid for it, and 21 to watch someone else do it. Tell me that makes sense.
RT @VeryRudeTweets: I don't understand why Christians are against gay marriage. Jesus had two dads, he turned out alright.
RT @VeryRudeTweets Twilight - the story of a young woman's choice to practice either bestiality or necrophilia.
"The main idea of "Inception": if you run a VM inside a VM inside a VM inside a VM, everything will be very slow"