"我开鲍鱼的工具 *鲍鱼刀*
别人开鲍鱼的工具 *奔驰车*"
(not rejected by iFunny but the OCR would've been messed up anyway)
"Lauren, 24
Stop looking at the boobs, I'm the other one."
*Woman in cowgirl suit with multiple teats sticking out*