Masculine faces appeal most to women in countries where disease is rife - "The research challenges the long-held belief that beauty is largely determined by culture. "When women are choosing a mate, they're weighing up two different things. On the one hand a really attractive, high genetic quality mate will give them very healthy offspring. On the other, there is getting "investment" from a mate – one who'll be a good dad," said Lisa DeBruine, who led the study at Aberdeen University in the UK. "Men who are really attractive tend to be able to pursue whatever mating strategy is best for them," she added. "They are more likely to prefer short-term relationships. More feminine men tend to be better providers.""
Damn patriarchy!
Meme - "ALPHA vs BETA
Alpha: has sex with men to assert his dominance as a straight alpha male
Beta: has sex with women because he's too weak to handle a real man"
BBC Radio 4 - Best of Today, Has modern man lost his way? - "‘There's a second main theme of your book, that we have for modern women in Liberal democracies, a very strong story about feminism which is about freedom and fulfillment, but you argue that we don't really have a story for what modern men should be, we don't uh talk about it enough, we don't articulate it enough culturally.’
‘Very often what young men feel… is a list of don'ts. You know, don't be like this, don't say that, don't do this, don't be toxic and that's not good enough. Of course there are things we have to learn not to do but we can't just assume that masculinity is a problem to be dealt away with. Instead what we need to do is reform and expand masculinity and really create a powerful and attractive vision of masculinity that is a real alternative in the eyes of a 12 or 14 year old boy to someone like Andrew Tate’"
Facebook - "So I am going to step up on my pedestal for a minute. Frodo and Sam are not gay and if you say that they are, you're a pervert who contributes to the mental health issues of young American men. You probably also never went through something hard with another human being. It is a rather disgusting thing that a friendship as wholesome as Frodo's and Sam's is one fo the major examples of people stating if two male characters show affection they are gay. I know a few of my friendships would be seen in the same way if portrayed in media because men cannot show affection without being gay and if you don't show emotion then you're toxic. There is nothing sexual about the love Frodo and Sam feel for each other. I will state that this is not about bashing gay people, you do you, I have no interest in what you want to do with another consenting adult. The issue is that men can't be portrayed in media as having affection towards another man without thousands of articles, posts, fanfic, and fanart of those characters being gay. Hugging your bro does not make you gay and stop saying that it does."
My wife is bisexual and nonbinary, and my daughter is transgender. My queer family helped me better understand myself and my masculinity. - "As the only nonqueer person in the family, I often feel left out by their shared experience. But my queer family has taught me a lot about myself and how masculinity can be less restrictive... I like my wife and I like my daughter, and it's pleasing to know they have common ground. They can gather to share experiences, see comedians, and/or mock me."
???
Why most men don't have enough close friends - "making and retaining deep, meaningful friendships as an adult is hard, especially for men, according to research. Less than half of men report being satisfied with their friendships, and only about 1 in 5 said they had received emotional support from a friend in the last week, compared with 4 in 10 women, according to a 2021 survey from the Survey Center on American Life. The falling off of friendships between men begins around middle and late adolescence and grows starker in adulthood, said Judy Yi-Chung Chu, who teaches a class on boys' psychological development at Stanford University in California. And those who do maintain friendships with other men say they tend to have lower levels of emotional intimacy than women report... Research has shown close friendships protect our mental and physical health, she added. And men who prioritize those relationships are fighting off one of the most harmful things to human health — loneliness... When Sileo first began conducting research on male friendships in 1995, many participants assumed his survey was about homosexuality, he said. Such stereotypes that male bonding would be, or become, sexual in nature are inaccurate, but revealed some of what may be holding some men back from deep friendships"
MODERN MAN on Twitter - "A boy becomes a man when he realises no one is coming to save him."
Meme - elena @Elena_PLMx: "On en parle du niveau de patriarcat et de conservatisme dans Avatar 2 ? Le héros principal :grrr, grrr moi homme, moi protéger famille. Grrrr, grrrr famille unie c'est le plus important dans la vie grrr"
Il vaut mieux laisser mourir ces ingrats
James Cameron,‘Avatar’ Director, Calls Testosterone A ‘Toxin,’ Here’s The Response - "he had described himself as previously “a wild, testosterone-poisoned young man,” and labeled testosterone as “a toxin that you have to slowly work out of your system.” Those statements seemed to rile up the testosterone of those who are apparently hard-core fans of the hormone, leading to some “I’m an alpha manly-man” and this is “a war on men” responses that may have been a bit over the top. Regardless, Cameron’s statements did seem to display a fundamental misunderstanding of the biology of the hormone and what it does... testosterone is not toxin. It’s not something you simply drink out of a bottle and can eventually quit cold turkey or even warn turkey. You need testosterone, whether you are a man or a woman. It is not something you can just “slowly work out of your system.”... If you have ovaries rather than balls, remember ovaries and adrenal glands can also produce testosterone. Men can’t tell women, “You don’t know what it is like to have testosterone,” because women need testosterone too... Ultimately, casting testosterone as some kind of toxin is just the wrong story line, it’s wrong to a T"
Weird. We are told that criticising toxic masculinity doesn't mean masculinity is toxic (of course the author tries to do damage control)
Meme - "Why do you workout so much?"
">that guy that wasted his youth on videogames and anime, had no or very few friends in school, never had the balls to ask that girl that he liked out and now tries to fix his life through putting heavy things up and down, even though having a better physique will neither fix his psychological issues caused by his lack of social experience in his teenage years nor will it fix his constant regret of not having lived his earlier life to its fullest."
"Ya know I just like to stay healthy."
Of course, the cope will be to demand that people "post physique"
Arnaz Hathiram on Twitter - "One of my friends has 3 Daughters (6-year-old & 2-year-old twins) He said, "I am ok with whatever they want to become...musician, artist, any other creative field...(pauses)...I'm not sure if I'd have same thoughts if I had a Son..." Men are Born with Burden of being Provider"
The devotion of the human dad separates us from other apes - "When I began researching fathers 10 years ago, the belief was that they contributed little to the lives of their children and even less to our society, and that any parenting behaviour a man might display was the result of learning rather than any innate fathering skill. Stories of fathers in the media centred on their absence and the consequences of this for our society in terms of antisocial behaviour and drug addiction, particularly among sons. There was little recognition that the majority of men, co-resident or not, were invested in their children’s lives. It was a given that fathers did not develop the profound bonds with their children that mothers did, because their role was confined to that of a secondary parent who existed, as a consequence of work, at a slight distance from the family. The lack of breadth in the literature and its sweeping generalisations and stereotypes was truly shocking. As an anthropologist, I struggled to accept this portrayal for two reasons. In the first instance, as someone who began her graduate career as a primatologist, I knew that fathers who stick around, rather than hot-footing it as soon as copulation is complete, are vanishingly rare in the primate world, limited to a few South American monkey species and completely absent from the apes, with the exception of ourselves. Indeed, we are among the only 5 per cent of mammals who have investing fathers. I knew that, given the parsimonious nature of evolution, human fatherhood – with its complex anatomical, neural, physiological and behavioural changes – would not have emerged unless the investment that fathers make in their children is vital for the survival of our species. Secondly, as an anthropologist whose training encompassed the societal structures and practices that are so fundamental to an understanding of our species, I was surprised to learn how little time we had spent placing this key figure under the microscope of our analysis. Ethnography after ethnography focused on the family and the role of the mother, and duly acknowledged the cooperative nature of childrearing, but very rarely was dad the particular subject of observation. How could we truly call ourselves human scientists when there was such a glaring gap in our knowledge of our own species?... In all cultures, regardless of their economic model, fathers teach their children the vital skills to survive in their particular environment... Fathers are so critical to the survival of our children and our species that evolution has not left their suitability for the role to chance. Like mothers, fathers have been shaped by evolution to be biologically, psychologically and behaviourally primed to parent. We can no longer say that mothering is instinctive yet fathering is learned... crucially, dad has not evolved to be the mirror to mum, a male mother, so to speak. Evolution hates redundancy and will not select for roles that duplicate each other if one type of individual can fulfil the role alone. Rather, dad’s role has evolved to complement mum’s. This is no more clear than in the neural structure of the brain itself... how do we know that dads and kids prefer rough-and-tumble play with each other rather than, say, having a good cuddle? Because hormonal analysis has shown that, when it comes to interacting with each other, fathers and children get their peaks in oxytocin, indicating increased reward, from playing together. The corresponding peak for mothers and babies is when they are being affectionate... Likewise, a father’s attachment to his child has evolved to be crucially different than a mother’s"
Feminists and liberals are going to be very upset that the two-sex, two-parent family has been selected for by evolution
Meme - "What's something that sucks about being a man?
Bob Jones
About 10 years ago now, our at the time 9 year old son died of cancer. Hundreds of people asked my wife how she was doing, offered her support, etc. Lots of people asked me how she was doing, how the kids were doing, and how I had to be strong for her and our 2 remaining kids. Only a few close male friends asked me how I was doing. Not one of my female friends did. Not even my mother. Never occurred to them. That really sucked. Not because I didn't think my wife deserved support - of course she did - but so did I."
BBC Radio 4 - Moral Maze, The Morality of Masculinity - "‘The intention is very noble, to encourage in boys, what is productive, socially productive, to be encouraged their gentleness, sensitivity and so on. I happen to believe that many men actually have that sensitivity and gentleness anyway. But I think that the false assumption is that boys and men feel better for having their so call feminine side brought out. I believe very strongly that one of the peculiarities of this whole sexual relationship situation is that men feel very differently from women in this, in this respect, in that women are much more secure in what they are in their sexual identity, because they basically, their biology tells them all the time what they are. Men, I think, feel very much more vulnerable and have to define themselves. And I have great sympathy with this idea that masculinity is therefore to a large extent, constructed. I think they are psychologically fragile, and they actually need to differentiate themselves from women. What terrifies them is the belief that there is nothing different between men and women. That makes them panic because then they don't know what they are. And so I think what Tom Ross Williams is doing with the best of intentions is possibly making the situation even worse.’...
‘We definitely have certainly mentioned to my sons, if you're out and about, and it's at night, and you don't walk too close to behind a woman, you don't put fear into her mind that needn't be there. In the sense, be mindful of your space. Now, you could say, well, that's just an application of chivalry, I think in this case, it's something that has a reason it is gendered behavior as it is gendered behavior, simply because the risk of violence against women is so much higher than the risk of violence against men. So I think, you know, there is an element sometimes of wanting to have our cake and eat it on the chivalry point.’"
Women are born. Men are made. So getting rid of gender norms will hurt most men
Cal of Thulcandra on Twitter - "Men play video-games as a manifestation of the frustrated urge to build, fight, & create. Women have cats & dogs to satisfy the maternal instinct. The truth is manifest, no matter how ruined reality becomes."
Meme - Liberal Woman: "Straight men need to stop being repressed and start honestly expressing their emotions"
Men: "We're deeply frustrated by a society that constantly seems to be emasculating and undermining us while delegitimising any complaints we have because of "privileges" that do nothing to reduce the frustration of living in an isolating, sedentary and self-destructive culture increasingly devoid of age-old sources of happiness like community, religion, national identity, and family"
Liberal Woman: "No not like that
fragile bigots smh
I bet you all have small dicks"
ZUBY: on Twitter - "I've noticed that every man who encourages men to embrace their masculinity and improve themselves gets attacked by the internet. The hivemind wants you to be fat, broke, lonely, sad, confused, and low T. And to feel guilty about stuff you haven't even done. You must reject it."
We keep being told "toxic masculinity" doesn't mean masculinity is toxic. But given the reaction towards those who promote masculinity...
Kelli Tennant on the uproar over the photo of Kiké Hernandez and a bucket - "The photo was taken in April of 2017, and those who follow the Dodgers and the club’s telecasts on Spectrum SportsNet LA understood it was all in fun: Kiké Hernandez, all 5-foot-10 of him, standing on a bucket to conduct a postgame interview with Kelli Tennant, 6-2 and wearing heels, the continuation of a long-running gag. And then, almost 15 months later, someone who didn’t know the context or didn’t care decided to weigh in on Twitter... “I had a lot of responses to that emotionally,” Tennant says now. “I think the world of Kiké. He is such an incredible human. … There is no toxic masculinity in any fiber of his being. “I spoke to him and Mariana, his fiance, over and over, over a period of a couple of weeks because it turned from something that seemed kind of funny into a very, very negative post. And I started posting on his behalf, in defense of him, because I was not OK with the way people were treating him, speaking about him. And I ended up starting to get attacked saying that I was not supportive of women because I allowed him to do that, which if you know anything about me you know that that’s the exact opposite. “The thing that I tried to really help people understand is that this was a long-standing, over two-year joke between us that happened in the clubhouse. And many other players did it as well. It wasn’t just Kiké. Chase Utley used to jump on a couch and say ‘I’m ready,’ and I thought it was so funny. None of them are ever degrading or said, ‘Oh, don’t wear your heels. What’s wrong with you?’ It was always, they treated me like their sister. Everything was in jest. And I appreciated that. “And I am really tall. I’m 6-4 in heels. I know that. So if someone wants to make fun of me, I actually think it’s hilarious. I know what I’m doing. I’m aware. And it’s an inside joke that was taken out of context and unfortunately that’s the world of social media. And I’m just so sorry that he had to bear the brunt of that because he didn’t deserve it.” Tennant dropped away from social media for a period earlier in the year. Was she tempted to say, ‘I’m out’ again after that? “No, no,” she said. “You know, it’s actually good because I realized that I can’t worry about what people think of me or what they say because at the end of the day everyone’s going to have an opinion and most of these people don’t know me. They don’t know Kiké. And so you have to take everything with a grain of salt. “And if there was any validity to it then maybe I would have taken an internal look at myself and said, ‘Oh, maybe I shouldn’t do that.’ But there wasn’t any. And you have to be able to have fun. We can’t be so sensitive that we can’t have fun and pull jokes like that (or) what’s the point? You know, life is too short.”"
The fact that so many people were bashing "fragile masculinity" over an out-of-context photo - and worse, attacked the people involved even after knowing the context - suggests something about their psychological makeup
Stirling Cooper on Twitter - "Man expresses enthusiasm = creep Man expresses frustration = incel Man expresses anger = toxic Man expresses sadness = weak Man shares emotions other than happiness = emotional labor Man shares no emotions at all = emotionally distant What did I miss?"
The only emotions men are allowed to express are disgust and shame about being male
Addendum: "Man expresses loneliness = incel"
Where are the men of courage? They're gone thanks to 'toxic masculinity' - "We vilify action men, brand chivalry and valor “toxic masculinity,” stamp on the manly virtues that made civilization possible. Then we are shocked when armed cops stand around outside a classroom while children are slaughtered, or when straphangers watch passively as a woman is assaulted on the subway... We used to venerate men like the entire shift of 15 firefighters from Midtown’s Engine 54/Ladder 4/Battalion 9, whose fading photographs still face the heedless crowds on Eighth Avenue. Men with families to live for, who rushed to their deaths on 9/11, because they believed in a system of honor and duty, in which they were destined to be guardians of the community... Now their inheritors show up at emergencies and the public throws bottles of urine at them. Social-justice warriors and their eager media accomplices smear cops every day as racists and murderers. #ACAB (“All cops are bastards”) is their favorite hashtag. We pathologize manly virtues and bow to the tyranny of identity politics that seeks power by overthrowing a make-believe patriarchy. We raise boys in a soup of reproach and negativity that tells them their intrinsic nature is diseased... The only acceptable man now is a man who wants to be a woman. We celebrate “pregnant men” and “chestfeeding” men. You see, in the drive to destroy masculinity, we’ve had to erase women as well. We ignore the crisis that sees men commit suicide at ever increasing rates or succumb to drug abuse and porn addiction while savvy young women graduate from college in disproportionate numbers. Trained from childhood to be entitled and unrealistic about relationships, their fertility and the sacrifices and joys of motherhood, many become bitter and blame men for their confusion. Along the way, we emasculate the institutions that were necessarily masculine for our protection, notably the military. As an example, on Wednesday, the US Marines celebrated Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer and Intersex Pride Month by tweeting a picture of a combat helmet adorned with rainbow-colored bullets. So, what do men do? They recoil and retreat. They leave the stage for hysterical epsilon men like Beto O’Rourke who whine and posture but can’t protect a thing. Then when we need a strong, quick-thinking Gary Cooper to save us from outlaws, he’s nowhere to be found. He has been rendered extinct, leaving 19 kids to be slaughtered inside a classroom while men and women wearing the legacy costume of toxic masculinity stand around waiting for orders. “We make men without chests and expect from them virtue and enterprise,” C.S. Lewis foretold in his dystopian 1943 book “The Abolition of Man.” “We laugh at honor and are shocked to find traitors in our midst. We castrate and bid the geldings be fruitful.”"
The Myth of Toxic Masculinity - "The lead article in APA’s flagship journal this month (Di Bianca & Mahalik, 2022) calls for a redefining of masculinity from what it calls “hegemonic masculinity” (meaning toxic masculinity) to something more, well, feminine. Oppression and violence are blamed on toxic masculinity, and boys, according to the article, should be raised in “relationships of empathy, mutuality, and empowerment.” No, they don’t mean sports teams, dojos, or the military, although it’s unclear why not, since those organizations certainly provide relationships of that sort. What they mean is that boys should be less, you know, boyish. The desirability of masculinity, like anything else, depends on how you define it. If you think it means beating up defenseless victims (and I get the distinct impression that this is exactly how APA sees masculinity), then it seems like a bad thing. If you mean standing up for what’s right, it’s a little harder to see how there can be too much of that. Here’s one description of masculinity (from my detective novel, Little Things): “I like providing for my family. I like being right, and I like sex. I’m proud of my success and I don’t feel guilty about other people’s suffering unless I caused it. I think it’s more important to be funny than to be tender. I don’t think ‘you-hurt-my-feelings’ is a valid argument.” When people talk about toxic masculinity, they don’t mean masculinity at all. Usually, they mean paranoia, sociopathy, malignant narcissism, or some form of self-righteous vindictiveness. These are as common in women as in men, although in men, these ills are more likely to be expressed as physical violence (though still at a low rate). But to blame the violence on the maleness rather than, say, the paranoia of the perpetrator is like blaming robbery and murder on the race of the perpetrator. When faced with the image of a school shooter, if you hate men, you see a man. If you like men, you see a paranoid person. If you hate Black people and look at violent crime data (a disproportionate number of robberies and murders are committed by Black people), you see race when you look at perpetrators rather than rage. Masculinity is a good thing in both men and women but is not well-suited to every situation. But that is not the fault of masculinity any more than it is the fault of negotiation, rationality, or democracy that they are not well-suited to every situation. You wouldn’t call it “toxic democracy” when majority rule insufficiently protects the rights of the minority. Instead, you might call it a problem with humanity, a species that tends to abuse and exploit power in any group or individual that has it... Currently, in psychology, it seems to be culturally allowed and even expected to hate men and therefore to blame all ills perpetrated by men on masculinity and to attribute the capacity to perpetrate similar ills to all men. Or, intersectionally speaking, organized psychology blames straight, White, cis-gendered, able-bodied men for what’s wrong with the world. And yet, here’s an interesting fact hidden among all the memes about men making rules about women’s bodies: A court composed of nine men (eight of them White and, as far as we know, straight, cis-gendered, and able-bodied) created or discovered a right to privacy for women over their own bodies by a 7-2 vote in the case of Roe v. Wade... stop telling kids how special they are and emphasize instead how special they are to you. The more kids feel good about being ordinary, the less likely they will be to aggrandize themselves, villainize others, or exploit others to compensate for the ubiquitous sense that they are not as special as they think they are supposed to be."
Liberals blame crimes committed by white people on race (actually, crimes committed by non-white people are also the fault of "white supremacy" now), so it fits
Meme - Purp @_herbeautyxo: "I don't want my man to wear glasses , I feel like that’s a lil gay"
logic luther king: @jaboukie - "fellas is it gay to see"
NicelyOffensive @TreyCrll: "Oh no! My fragile masculinity must be saved! Welp, guess I gotta throw out my glasses now. Fuck it, might as well pluck my eyes out with a spoon too."
Weird how a woman being sexist is somehow the fault of "fragile masculinity". But feminism is basically blaming men for everything
I wanted my son to reject masculine stereotypes. Then he fell in love with tractors - "After turning 2 years old, my son, Avishai, started demanding that he only wear tractor shirts, and my mind spiraled into darkness. I catastrophized worst-case scenarios, imagining a world where he fell for everything stereotypically manly. I envisioned him on a football field, barreling through mega-muscled opponents. Imagined him waxing a sports car on a warm summer day. I have always judged other guys who seemed boxed in by masculinity, but 3 ½ years ago, when I became a stay-at-home dad, my bias skyrocketed... To me, femininity was connected to empathy and kindness while masculinity equated to being frigid. Men didn’t hug. Men didn’t say I love you. Men were angry. Aggressive. Inept as parents. I became determined. I was going to create a bond stronger than any parent had ever achieved, but I told myself that to do so I needed to distance myself from anything deemed masculine... I grimaced at anyone driving a Ford car, the John Wayne of automobiles. I hated men who wore plaid. Felt ill if someone mentioned a wrench or another tool. When my mom-in-law bought Avishai a coverall with footballs on it, I shoved it into the depths of his closet, never to be found. It wasn’t as if I’d grown up with a negative example of fatherhood. My dad was an interior decorator, working 60 hours a week at the family business: Deitcher’s Wallpaper and Design Center. Outwardly, my father filled the role of man of the house, but inside, my mom made most of the family decisions. My father was never afraid to blur boundaries. I was hugged frequently and told I love you. He, too, despised sports, but loved watching Hallmark movies with my mom. After his employees started selling home-manicure sets as a side hustle, my father spent nights sitting at the kitchen counter beautifying his nails... I pride myself on blurring gender lines. I wanted him to, also."
Rejecting "stereotypes" just means adhering to a different set
It's clear that despite the spiel about "toxic masculinity" not being the same as masculinity, a lot of liberals really do hate masculinity, and there is slippage
All Masculinity Is Toxic - "Feminist writer and activist John Stoltenberg believes we need to give up manhood for good if we want to live morally sound and love-filled lives... the prominent feminist scholar has openly equated the idea of “healthy masculinity” with the oxymoron of “healthy cancer.” This is because he sees manhood as an identity built entirely out of oppression. He contends that the parts of manhood that we view as non-toxic don’t actually have a designated gender—and describing these actions or qualities as masculine just reflects our disdain for women... Stoltenberg was married to Andrea Dworkin, the deceased radical feminist"
Weird. We keep being told that feminists aren't saying that all masculinity is toxic, even as they condemn everything masculine