Tuesday, February 21, 2023

Human Nature and Hollywood Marriage

From a newsletter, and no longer available online: 

 

Human nature book recommendations:
https://www.robkhenderson.com/favorite-books

I recently appeared on David Perell’s North Star Podcast, where we spoke about dating, evolutionary psychology, luxury beliefs, social status, and much more. Check it out here.
In his fascinating book “Story” — which The Last Psychiatrist has called "the textbook of psychoanalysis” — Robert McKee discusses what he terms “The Law of Conflict”: “When a protagonist steps out of the Inciting Incident, he enters a world governed by the Law of Conflict. To wit: Nothing moves forward in a story except through conflict. Put another way, conflict is to storytelling what sound is to music…The music of story is conflict…when stories lack conflict, the writer is forced into ‘table dusting.’” My memoir is the first 30 years of my life with all the boring parts taken out. What remains are the conflicts.
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Why are there so few happy families on TV? As I’ve written before, I’ve watched a lot of it. Spoilers ahead. The fourth season of The Sopranos portrays the collapse of Tony and Carmela’s marriage. The fight in the season finale between them showcases the immense talent of the actors. Many other prestige TV shows portray crumbling marriages. In The Shield (currently in the middle of watching), Vic and Corrine go through a separation in the second season. I suspect part of this is because the actress who plays Corrine is married in real life to the showrunner Shawn Ryan. Even in the first season, Vic and Corrine rarely show affection for one another. Perhaps Ryan didn’t want his wife to get too close to the star of the show. Interestingly, Vic is often shown hooking up with a female colleague. Part of this, of course, is to show that Vic is not a good guy, despite his claims to be a family man. Another reason is to indicate his interest in women. And other great shows, Curb Your Enthusiasm, The Affair, and Mad Men (next on my re-watch list) depict their stars divorcing. Sometimes more than once.
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Hollywood often portrays marriage as a trap. Stagnant and dull. But when you look at the upper class in my beloved home state of California, they are far more likely than average to be married. For example, marriage levels for college-educated parents is 20 percent higher than for non-college graduates. In the fancy zip codes in Los Angeles, between 50 and 70 percent of households are married. Many of the people living in these areas are Hollywood executives and creative types working in showbusiness. In contrast, in the poorest areas, less than 15 percent of households are married. 85 percent of Californians with a college degree say that family diversity, “where kids grow up in different kinds of families,” should be publicly celebrated. But 68 percent of Californians with a college degree say that it is personally important for them to have their own kids in marriage. My best friends in high school:

  • 1 raised by his grandmother because his mom was an addict and his father was in prison
  • 1 raised by a single mom who had a new boyfriend living in their apartment every other month
  • 1 raised by his dad who was married and divorced 5 times before we graduated high school
  • And me


The richest Californians say this is fine for my friends and me, but not for them.Luxury beliefs are ideas and opinions that confer status on the upper class, while inflicting costs on the lower classes.
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Does entertainment have to contain sex to appeal to audiences? McKee wrote that conflict is key to keep a story going. But do stories have to involve sexual conflict to sell? Unlikely. Research has found, for example, that there is no relationship between box-office receipts and sexual content.

But there is a correlation between sexual content and number of Oscar nominations and awards received. Sexual content appeals more to elites than to ordinary people. One of the most successful sitcoms from my childhood, The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, portrayed a happy family. Uncle Phil didn’t have a mistress. Aunt Viv wasn’t hooking up with her TA. Sitcoms, typically geared more toward regular people than elites, often depict happy marriages.Modern Family is one example. But why are such families represented only in situation comedies? Maybe the idea is that it’s only okay to present happy families in a humorous way. In Mad Men, Don Draper says the idea that “sex sells” is a way for uncreative people to fool themselves into thinking they understand the ad industry. Peggy Olson “Sex sells.” Don Draper “Says who? Just so you know, the people who talk that way think that monkeys can do this…You are the product. You—feeling something. That's what sells. Not them. Not sex. They can't do what we do, and they hate us for it.” This is true. But Mad Men contains lot of sex, which helped it sell. And it was almost exclusively watched by elites. Attractive people smoking and drinking and having sex with strangers appeals more to the upper classes than the lower classes. Conflict can take many forms. There are many ways to get an audience to “feel something.”
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Side note: In 1977, Michel Foucault, Jean-Paul Sartre, Jacques Derrida, Simone de Beauvoir, and Gilles Deleuze, among other well-known intellectuals, signed a petition to the French parliament calling for the decriminalization of sex between adults and children. Some say the idea that this movement would ever arrive in the U.S. is ridiculous. Others have invoked the Law of Merited Impossibility: “It will never happen, and when it does, you will deserve it.” The aim is to advance steadily toward the goal while appearing not to move at all: to show the blade only in the instant before one strikes.
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Recommended Podcasts:Geoffrey Miller - Mating in the 21st Century (Subversive w/Alex Kaschuta)Rob Henderson: An Internet Academic (North Star Podcast with David Perell)
Recommended Articles:Is bread healthy? A comprehensive guide by Steven ArenaWhy Does Sexual Repression Exist? by Randall Collins

 

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