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Europe CNY 2012
Day 2 - 20th January - Tate Britain (Part 6)
Next was a JMW Turner gallery. The struck me was that there were explanations for all the works. Amazing.
The opening of the Walhalla
"German artists, used to a more literal style, found the picture laughable"
I agree with the Germans
Decline of the Carthaginian Empire
The Painting of Hero and Leander
On the late Turner: "During the artist's lifetime his late oil paintings were frequently criticised and ridiculed. Described by one contemporary as 'pictures of nothing and very like', they were often derided for their loose, unfinished appearance and chromatic intensity. Undeterred by public opinion, Turner followed his own path... he can therefore be seen to fit the role of the Romantic artists, a misunderstood genius heroically following his own impulses, rather than the expectations of society"
"pictures of nothing and very like" is a good description.
Ancient Rome: Agrippina Landing with the Ashes of Germanicus
"His passing symbolised a significant moment in the inexorable decline of Imperial Rome"
This was a rubbish description. Germanicus died in AD 19 - barely after Imperial Rome had started.
A Wreck, with Fishing Boats
"A Wreck" would've sufficed as a descriptor. My camera failed to focus on this twice.
Sunrise with Sea Monsters
This is an unfinished canvas. Could you tell? Me neither. My camera could - it failed to focus five times, until I directed it to the "monster"'s head.
Fishing upon the Blythe-Sand
"In later years, Turner apparently used the canvas as a cat flap". Uhh.
Jason
This was very dark
King Lear weeping over the dead body of Cordelia
Scene from 'Twelfth Night' ('Malvolio and the Countess')
The Field of Waterloo
The Last In
Late at School
Lord Byron's dream
The Reconciliation of Helen and Paris after his Defeat by Menelaus
The Temptation of St Anthony
Unfortunately not everything had explanations. For example most of the modern art was not. Maybe because it was ???
Flaga (1972-2000). A Fiat 126 Produced in Turin, Italy, in 1974 and Customized Using Parts Manufactured and Fitted in Poland, Following a Journey of 1290 km from Turin to Cieszyn.
The Orientalist
I'm guessing this was mocking the idea of Orientalism
Portrait of the Artist as a shadow of his former self
The Restless Image - A Discrepancy Between the Felt Position and the Seen Position. Self Portrait
Pseudo-upskirt??? This actually has a description on the website.
A Hundred Mile Walk
Like this also can???
???
The only blonde in the world
Huh?
The Fine Art Bit
Inverse Reverse Perverse
I then left for my show for the evening.
This was the most realistic Wicked ad I'd ever seen - usually Galinda and Elphaba are a lot more abstract:
You will also notice that this map for theatres marks "restaurants" (numbering 22) and "spaghetti houses" (numbering 3) separately. Maybe it's lobbying.
I came across a homeless guy and gave him 2 Krispy Kremes. I'd made the mistake of carrying them around. And in my bag (not in my hand). So they got smashed up. But he was happy anyway.
"Jane Juska placed an ad which said "Before I turn 67 – next March – I would like to have a lot of sex with a man I like. If you want to talk first, Trollope works for me". She received 63 replies and A Round-Heeled Woman tells the real-life adventures of some of the encounters which resulted. The playdeals with the universally engaging themes of love, loss, personal empowerment, and the wisdom which comes with the passing years. And yes... sex."
From elsewhere: "Jane's courageous journey takes her through falling in love, some heartbreak, rejection and humiliation, a lot of laughs, and her first orgasm with a man after 30 years."
I might've watched this, but the run was over.
"Please use this site responsibly"
I never expected to see this at a dump
"London sperm bank: Be special, give sperm"
Erm.
It seemed all the vending machines, bins and vendors had disappeared from the Tube network. Must've been security measures. Poor Cardinal Woolsey.
My show for the evening was in the Savoy. Being an old theatre, it was bad for my leg. Bah.
My show for the evening was Legally Blonde. My sister said she didn't know I was into either Bartok or Blondes, but as everyone knows Gentlemen prefer Blondes.
Stage
Binoculars for hire. HAH.
"Elle, do you know the number one reason behind all bad hair decisions? Love!"
I knew they brought in ice cream to the hall during the interval, but I also noticed beer and wine. Presumably the margins cover cleaning costs.
During the prison skipping scene ("Whipped into Shape") some of the 'girls' were guys with wigs.
After the show I got to eat and decided to try the fad; I saw more Pret a Mangers than Starbucks and McDonald's combined.
Falafel and Halloumi Hot Wrap
This was quite good actually
"Vitamin Volcano" smoothie
"nice teeth lol!!!
omg! Mind the gap lol!!
Don't be mean, it's not gummy, I mean funny!!!
I thought Austin Powers had bad teeth roflmao!!!
need to quit chewin rocks for breakfast!! :D"
Fun ad
"Your perfect girl could be sitting right under this ad
We're here just in case she isn't
She's in London somewhere. All you have to do is find her. Hence Lovestruck, the dating site for single professionals
There's nothing like falling in love. And there's no one like Lovestruck for making it happen."
Another fun ad
"We'll help you find the right mobile plan"
Yet another fun ad: Yoda's choice
On Euston Station and street names around
Sugar free Red Bull: "No sugar. Just energy"
How ironic
Display of dollars on your Oyster card is inconsistent. Sometimes it shows when you tap out but not in, and sometimes it's the reverse. And sometimes it doesn't show at all.
Now that I looked carefully, it seemed many blondes were bottle blondes. How disappointing. Supposedly the way to tell if they're bottle blondes is to look at their eyebrows, since most of them forget. Yet, I looked at a group of pre-pubescent (lower primary) girls - who presumably did not (yet) have dyed hair, and realised the eyebrows might not be an accurate measure, because blonde is really a whole spectrum.
The standard in the tube is to keep right. In one station corridor the directions were to keep left. How peculiar.