"It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating." - Oscar Wilde

***

From May:


"ASEAN-Republic of Korea Commemorative Summit. Partnership for Real, Friendship for Good"
What is probably a translation issue makes it sound like they're really on very bad terms.


"T[ender] r[aw] a[musing] n[aughty] n[ostalgic] y[es, ah kua show!]... Ah Kua Show... 10% discount for transgender audience"
Maybe I should've tried my luck. Presumably this would be called bigotry if it wasn't by a real Ah Kua (and thus qualify as "reclamation")


Cat in drain


Chinese wine in faux gourd


"If your dog poops please scoop. Action will be taken if caught (sic)"
I love how they have to mention "if caught"


"Happy [Dead] Crab. Freshness Guaranteed"


"Look, Ma. No pants!"


"Mahjulah Singapura" crest. I can't remember where this was.


"Hokkaido milk is... almost organic"
Almost don't cut it, kids!


Apparently you can exchange cooked food bought at the food court in Liang Court's basement... within 7 days.


NYDC: "Our meatballs now contain pork for extra flavour!"


This cartoon depiction of upskirting was in my French textbook. I assume this was illustrating: "Je fais des photos pour un journal". Le journal sexe?


National Museum signage FAIL


Pigeon drinking from a container


"Positive Result? Keep the Test!
Result remains positive over time.
One click and handle comes off for compact storage.
Conveniently keep it in your baby's album or show it to your doctor or loved ones at a later time."
This is quite screwed up.


This was sold in the shop which sells notebooks in Citylink. You can get the same for free from any office shredder.


"Bad News: Our lease has ended
Good News: We are still in the neighbourhood"


A rare sight: a woman in office attire sitting on the MRT floor (previously I'd only seen schoolgirls doing this)


"Increases calmth (sic), stamina, flexibility, balance & poise. Helps manage PMS, menstrual cramps, backache, water retention, stress.
Beauty blossoms from within. I am calm and filled with peace. I nurture me (sic) and my family. I look & feel beautful & I AM empowered and peaceful"
Yoga mumbo-jumbo to con women. I'll take my chances with Acai Berries, thanks.



"Japanese Daily. Air Flown Weekly Fresh from Japan"

And on the shelves:


"Back Bacon. Product of Denmark; Smoked Spicy Pork Sausage... Manufactured by Pan Pacific Singapore"


Alleged health benefits of Karaoke:


"唱卡拉OK可养生。
增强胸，肺，腹功能。防止声线老化
- 消除疲劳，增强脑力记忆，增加喉咙声亮。
- 唱前别紧张，唱时放松，并暂时忘掉工作的压力"

Translation:

"Singing Karaoke keeps you healthy. It strengthens the function of your chest, lungs and stomach, and prevents your vocal chords from atrophying.

It dissipates stress, boosts brain power and memory and makes your voice sound brighter.

Before you sing, don't be nervous. When you sing, relax and temporarily forget your work stress"

Right.