"'Whom are you?' he asked, for he had attended business college." - George Ade

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This is hilarious:

Petros the Pelican

"Petros the pelican was a White Pelican, who was the official mascot of the Greek island of Mykonos.

In 1958 a wounded pelican was found off the coast of Paranga shore by a local fisherman. The pelican was nursed to health and remained on the island supported by locals. It soon adopted the name "Petros" after the Greek word petras or "semen" resulting from a crude joke by local fishermen. To great disappointment by locals and tourists alike, Petros was hit by a car on 2 December 1985 and failed to recover.

Subsequently, three new pelicans reside around the main town of Mykonos. One, honorifically, was given the name Petros."