Wednesday, May 30, 2007

USP-Stanford Multiculturalism Forum
Day 1 (4/5-6/5) - Singapore-Tokyo-Palo Alto


This was my first time flying Japan Airlines, and they have some interesting features: an in-flight safety video and safety cards that use blocky cartoon characters and threats to fine you if you don't obey the captain's instructions even once.

The famous cloisteredness of the Japs is also evident flying JAL. The English of the stewardesses was the most atrocious of all the airlines I've been on - even Royal Brunei, with the Trouble Prayer, does better; the announcement in Chinese made by one of their Singaporean crew was more fluent than the one in English made by one of the Japs (even though it sounded artificial and unfluent), which makes you wonder why they don't let the Singaporean crew make the English announcements too. We had no non-Japanese newspapers for our flight there and the in-flight magazine was all in Japanese.

I don't know why Japanese squat toilets are horizontal. Normal squat toilets are vertically oriented: you walk in, do a 180 degree turn and squat. Jap squat toilets are horizontally oriented: you walk in, do a 90 or 270 degree turn and squat. This seems counter-intuitive.

[MFTTW: it's probably so that the cheekopeks cannot stuck their camera phone under the toilet door and snap photos of your exposed genitals.]

We'd been advised not to leave the airport, but a 11/12 hour transit was too much for most of us to bear, so 8 of us went through immigration as a group and 7 of us took the train to Tokyo (one changed her mind; 2 others went separately) and hit Shibuya at 9:45, after almost 2 hours of travel.

I wanted to use an ATM to get a better rate but couldn't find any (they were tucked deeply into alcoves) so I had to get fleeced by a money changer at the airport. Grr.







Sign seen: 'Les deux magots'. Talk about false friends (it presumably means 'two nest eggs').

[Tim the Great: Les deux magots is famous
plus japs like french food
cafés, pastries etc]

For some reason there were a non-negligible number of schoolgirls walking around in uniform. It must be those doing it for fashion.


The place we'd chosen to visit (Shibuya) wasn't very photogenic, but as someone said, we could take pictures of beautiful people. Hurr hurr.


The principle behind camwhoring: when you're alone it's sad/stupid, but in a group it's okay. It's the same principle behind Orientation Mass Dances.


I was speculating that after the day we were there, the Loft would ban photos.

Shopping was quite blah due to globalisation which has homogenised the variety of products on offer worldwide through an insidious process of cultural imperialism. I should've lobbied to see the bizarre/perverted/disturbing/funky stuff that Japan is famous for.



For some reason many parts of Shibuya smelled of trash. Wth.



Transparent top umbrellas seemed to be in fashion - many many people were carrying them (I remember one of the group saying that one Korean/Jap guy doesn't like to go home after a month because it takes forever to learn what's in fashion). Or maybe it was because they were cheap at 300 yen (the next cheapest umbrellas we saw were 500 yen).


'The peaceful oasis in the centre of Shibuya'
I love Engrish. [Ed: For some reason this picture takes a long time to load, but it's worth it]

We got a recommendation from some roadside vendor for a lunch place. Unfortunately the waiter couldn't speak English (though some of the girls were gushing that he was cute) so Jabir half-translated the Japanese menu and we pointed. Ironic, given that there was a sign reading: "Please order and pay before sitting down".



Someone said that her friend claimed that she saw on Japan hour that miso soup was made from fish sperm. Bah.


My rather strange lunch. Clear broth in a kettle, and tonkatsu and cabbage on a hot plate. It came with an instructions sheet which I naturally could not read.

[Addendum: A reader:

I believe that was "ochazuke" with tonkatsu set.

ochazuke is basically broth with rice, comes in many variations such as salmon ochazuke, plum ochazuke, etc.

you were most probably supposed to put the ingredients from the smaller bowls into the rice and then pour the broth into it.
it is very tasty. try it again if you can :D]

After almost 4 hours and lunch we headed back for the airport, splitting into 2 and losing each other along the way; my group got on the wrong (more expensive) train and ended up paying at least 1000 yen more for a time saving of all of 20 minutes (50 mins vs 70 mins on the cheaper train, but at least we got comfortable seats). When we got back I found that even one of the cafes at the airport didn't have an English menu. Japan is even more English-unfriendly than France - there they pretend not to understand you, but here they don't even understand you (even the conductor on the Airport Express didn't speak it).

At an airport duty-free shop I bought a headband with a rising sun and reading: "Kamikaze". I must remember to wear that into my exams next semester.

The pair which went off separately went to the Imperial Palace though they didn't go in. Oh well. Perhaps another time.

The JAL breakfast included bacon (!) and pancakes. I was wondering why they gave us pancakes with savory stuff, and after finishing everything discovered that what I thought was dairy creamer was actually maple syrup (not even maple-flavoured!) Damn!

When we reached our hotel, Comfort Inn, everyone went to sleep. I tried to resist, but when you're in a room with 3 sleeping people it's very hard not to sleep too, so in the end I slept 2 hours (versus 3-4 for the rest).


A pizza from "Pizz'a Chicago" which sadly *did not* sell Chicago Pizza (wth) and oddly had a huge range of vegetarian pizzas (7/16 of their offerings). This pizza here has cilantro on it. Wah.


Quotes:

It is rude to use handphones on the train in Japan [Me: Is it rude to chikan?] You must say 'excuse me' first.

[Girl on the Tokyo subway] Why are all the girls here so good looking?

[Female student in convenience store:] I'm looking for condoms.

[On the temperature when it was raining at Nipponi station] I feel like I'm in a foreign country... Sometimes you go Malaysia and you feel like...

[On our chaperone who wasn't a chaperone] What does his room look like?... Is he lonely at night?... No. I am not implying that.