Email forward I got:


email from a student doing corporate finance summer subject:

excuse me, can we shift our exam time one day earlier on Feburary 13th? it is valentine's day on Feburary 14th.

thanks for regard!

happy new year and best wishes!

And response from the lecturer...


Dear XXX,

This is such an important question that I felt that it would be important to answer to all students who may be affected by the very serious predicament of an exam being held on the morning of Valentines Day.

Hence:

Dear all students (and especially those who may be romantically involved with another),

In setting the exam date for corporate finance I thought long and hard about the impact of it coinciding with Valentines Day. Would exam preparation be affected by shopping for perfume, flowers or the latest Anthony Callea cd? What about young lovers who planned on meeting for an early morning latte, a sugar-coated biscotti and a sharing of the Age's Epicure section at Brunetti's? Isn't life hard enough without having all the joy of the international day of lovers taken away by some cold-hearted academic eager to finish the exam period off and get to his summer chalet in Dromana? For who was I to stand in the way of young love, for wasn't I also young once?

With grim resolve, steely determination, a stiff upper lip, a hand of fate, a nose for trouble, a tennis elbow and an eye for detail I put forward my claim on behalf of the lovestruck to the Grand Poobah of exam timetabling:

"He-who-must-not-be-named-but-who-enjoys-setting-exams-for-large-classes-late-in-the-exam-period-so-as-to-frustrate-lecturers-in-charge".

In his infinite wisdom he replied:

"But XXX, what of our students of Italian, Chinese or Brazilian origin? For surely you know that in ancient Rome it was the festival of Lupercus,the god of fertility that was celebrated by young lovers on the 15th (not the 14th) of February. In China, Valentines day is superceded by "The Night of Sevens" (being the 7th day of the 7th month of the lunar calender) and in Brazil, June 12th marks the date of celebrating "Dia dos Namorados" (lit. "Day of the enamored", or "Boyfriend's/Girlfriend's Day"). Surely my friend, you are not suggesting that we alienate young lovers from each of these other important members of the university community?" [Reference: >http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valentine's_Day]

So, with head bowed and with great contrition I apologised to "He-who-must-not etc" for interrupting his musings on whether to set the next lot of the exams under the clocks at Flinders Street Station, in the Great Southern Stand at the MCG or in the roundabout on the corner of Elizabeth street and Royal Parade and returned to my office.

Students, and (specifically XXX) know this: I fought law and the law won, you have to know when to hold and know when to fold them, love is a battlefield. Now it is up to you to put it behind you, to show that true love can't be beaten by a three hour exam, even with an additional 15 minutes reading time.

Study hard friends.

Dr XXX "No-problem-too-small-(apparently)" XXX