Thursday, December 09, 2004

"When a person can no longer laugh at himself, it is time for others to laugh at him." - Thomas Szasz

Random Playlist Song: Trevor Pinnock - The English Concert and Choir: Handel - Messiah - His yoke is easy, his burden is light (chorus)

His yoke is easy, his burden is light.

***

While doing a reverse search referral lookup, I found the following: School Of Military Medicine :. Medical Core Song ::

How many errors can you spot in the page? :0 So far I've spotted 2. Melvin asked if it was the arrangement of the BCS boxes. Hee hee.

Tut tut. What a disgrace to the Medical Corpse.

***

Singapore Ink » Straits Times is the General Paper

"A GP essay is an essay that has broad brushstrokes and sweeping assertions instead of in-depth and rigorous arguments that engage the issue directly and demonstrate knowledge of the subject (for real).

A GP essay is an attempted demonstration (even worse than the previous characterisation) that “I know everything and here’s what I know", i.e. a cistern for puking out facts.

A GP essay is an essay that hedges bets, fudges points, sits on fence, offers two hands (on the one, on the other …), ends up with neither (or even worse, both), and has nothing in the way of personal opinion, strong argument or value to add to the subject.

A GP essay is any ST Editorial, or for that matter any column that Janadas Devan and Andy Ho writes."

Comment left on this entry: "I think most ST editorials (the short unsigned pieces on the top left) are good examples of how not to write GP essays. It reads like they assigned themselves a topic, say “the APEC summit", & proceeded to rattle off 30 semi-intelligent points they could come up with. Even if there was an actual thesis in there somewhere it would invariably be smothered. In short you are left befuddled, wondering whether you are reading an editorial or extracts of somebody’s lecture notes in point form. IMHO all GP teachers should emphasise this to their students, that right there in our de-facto national daily is an example of what they should not be doing. Here stereotyping a piece of writing as a GP essay has its analytical advantages"

***

User Friendly Strip

A: Whatever did we do before digital cameras?

B: Probably only took sensible photos.

***

More engineer jokes:


An Engineering Student, a Physics Student, and a Mathematics student were each given $150 dollars and were told to use that money to find out exactly how tall a particular hotel was.

All three ran off, extremely keen on how to do this. The Physics student went out, purchased some stopwatches, a number of ball bearings, a calculator, and got some friends. He had them all time the drop of ball bearings from the roof, and he then figured out the height from the time it took for the bearings to accelerate from rest until they impacted with the sidewalk.

The Math student waited until the sun was going down, then she took out her protractor, plumb line, measuring tape,and scratch pad, measured the length of the shadow, found the angle the buildings roof made from the ground, and used trignometry to figure out the height of the building.

These two students bumped into the Engineering student the next day, who was nursing a really bad hangover. When asked what he did to find the height of the building he replied: "Well, I walked up to the bell hop, gave him 10 bucks, asked him how tall the hotel was, and hit the bar inside for happy hour!"


Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.

The first said, "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered."

The second said, "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order."

The third said, "I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded."

The fourth one said, "I like to operate on lawyers. They're heartless spineless, gutless, and their heads and their ass are interchangeable."

The fifth surgeon says "I like engineers . They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end."


In the high school gym, all the girls in the class were lined up against one wall, and all the boys against the opposite wall. Then, every ten seconds, they walked toward each other until they were half the previous distance apart. A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer were asked, "When will the girls and boys meet?"

The mathematician said: "Never."
The physicist said: "In an infinite amount of time."
The engineer said: "Well... in about two minutes, they'll be close enough for all practical purposes."


Three engineers were in the bathroom standing at the urinals. The first engineer finished and walked over to the sink to wash his hands. He then proceeded to dry his hands very carefully. He used paper towel after paper towel and ensured that every single spot of water on his hands was dried. Turning to the other two engineers, he said, "At Hewlett Packard, we are trained to be extremely thorough."

The second engineer finished his task at the urinal and he proceeded to wash his hands. He used a single paper towel and made sure that he dried his hands using every available portion of the paper towel. He turned and said, "At Lockheed-Martin, not only are we trained to be extremely thorough, but we are also trained to be extremely efficient."

The third engineer finished and walked straight for the door, shouting over his shoulder, "At Apple Computer, Inc. we don't pee on our hands."


Acoustic Engineering

In a minimum-phase system there is an inextricable link between frequency response, phase response and transient response, as they are all merely transforms of one another. This combined with minimalization of open-loop errors in output amplifiers and correct compensation for non-linear passive crossover network loading can lead to a significant decrease in system resolution lost. However, this all means jack shit when you listen to Pink Floyd.

***

"Fundamentalist Christians do not tend to be progressive. In fact, they tend to be quite regressive and reactionary Hence, the Southern Baptist Convention opposing Martin Luther King and the Civil Rights Movement. And the fact that many conservative/fundamentalist churches in the south fought abolition with every ounce of their being. It's no accident that these same conservative religious forces are coming out in opposition to stem cell research and civil unions for homosexuals. It's all part of a historical trend of opposing social change and progress. And, I won't even get into the history of Christian fundamentalism in its opposition to advances in science and medicine."

Not coincidentally, you could substitute the words "Moral Majority" and "believers in tradition and moral values" in the above paragraph and it'd still be cogent.


A good characterisation of the fundies' mentality on AIDS and condom use from Yawning Bread:

"The moralists attach so much weight to their pious goals, they'd rather have death and disease than countenance anything that permits sin. If there can't be heaven on earth, let there be no earth."

***

A source tells me that even in the Police, NSFs are more hardworking than regulars.

Which is why it's impractical to have a conscript-regular mix. So since all-conscript forces are impossible, we must settle for the mere unfeasible - all-regular forces.

***

Hardtack Biscuits - Make your own dog biscuits

The Flat-out Truth: Earth Orbits? Moon Landings? A Fraud! Says This Prophet - "The idea of a spinning globe is only a conspiracy of error that Moses, Columbus, and FDR all fought... Uncle Joe (Stalin), Churchill, and Roosevelt laid the master plan to bring in the New Age under the United Nations," Johnson discloses with confidence. "The world ruling power was to be right here in this country. After the war, the world would be declared flat and Roosevelt would be elected first president of the world. When the UN Charter was drafted in San Francisco, they took the flat-earth map as their symbol."
This is so bad, it's good.

Ghosthouse - You'll shit your pants. By Joel Veitch, James Craven, Stefan Hamilton, James Wood - Enming finds the weirdest shit. This was kinda funny, though it gave me a headache after a while.

Pokementos...THE FRESHMAKER - "Whatever you do...dont steal an asian kids pokemon cards!!!"
blog comments powered by Disqus