Sunday, November 07, 2004



If there's somethin' strange in the neighbourhood, who ya gonna call?
If there's somethin' weird and it don't look good, who ya gonna call?

THE EXORCIST
Master Chew
H/P: 92729559
Np. 865 Mountbatten Road, #B1-28
Katong Shopping Centre S'pore 437844

www.ghostbuster99.com
Email: master@ghostbuster99.com (These 2 lines are printed in black ink on the reverse of the namecard)


As for the chinese, there's something about the "Ju4 Huang2" Jade King (not Emperor!), "Ming4 Li3" ("'principles of life' literally, some sort of predestination thingy...") and Feng Shui (maybe he offers those services also).


I picked this namecard up on a bus seat a while back. Apologies for the unclear image and the unprofessional cropping, but this was the best that I could do with the state my desktop is in; it won't read my Paint Shop Pro installation disc so all I could do was tweak brightness and contrast on the Canon Scangear CS-U panel and adjust the scan area as precisely as I could. Perhaps, when my computer troubles end, I shall come back and repair the image.

The website is great. Not only does it have pictures, video clips and testimonies, you can also start an online consultation with Master Chew. His marketing is great - this is the future of exorcism services. He can give those televangelists a run for their money.

"I have studied, trained and practiced for more than 15 years. I have even meditated in an unhabited island in Indonesia and Thailand. My spiritual teachers include the Jade Emperor, the Thousand-Arm Goddess of Mercy, and Chairman Mao" - The Jade Emperor and the Goddess of Mercy I understand, but I didn't know Chairman Mao had any skills in this department. Hell, I thought Traditional Chinese Religion was antithetical to communism.

Maybe I should call Master Chew in to exorcise the ghosts that keep causing my desktop to BSOD! But what I'd really like to see is him showing the fundies that they aren't the only ones with a monopoly on exorcism services.

***

Latest Dilbert Strip

"A well-dressed engineer has no credibility. I'll call my reverse makeover consultant"
"I'm Bob, the Straight eye for the Queer-looking guy."

Maybe I should become an engineer.

***

Random IRC logs:


[Pat] snoopus is a balding 52 year old man who encodes kiddie shows for children in attempt to lure him to his house for candy
[Snoopus] Pat - I don't watch pedophile shows like all the Japanese ones! (e.g. Sailor Moon, etc.)
[Snoopus] that is all you guys
[Pat] the japanese are just sick
[Snoopus] oh hi little girl, would you like to watch this Sailor Moon with me so I can see scantily dressed 13 year-old girls who show their panties?
[Cy-Chan] ...
[Cy-Chan] 13 year olds...
[Cy-Chan] That's just wrong
[Cy-Chan] ...Weren't they 14?
[Snoopus] now, how did I know that was coming?
[Snoopus] you're too predictible Chan
[MorphinZeo] in which case in Japan they're legal arent they?
* MorphinZeo remembers reading somewhere that is the age of consent in that country
[Cy-Chan] Pink Ranger: Oh no, I'm going to hit you! Pink Ranger: Oh no, you cut my suit! Pink Ranger: Oh no, my breast is conviently hanging out for all to cop a feel.
[Cy-Chan] And there we have Sentai
[Snoopus] that would be a wardrobe malfunction


[timeforce24] so ur a Biggot aswell Pat yes im Gay there i told the channel so what it doesnt effect me beining a fan of Power Rangers
[Pat] o.o
[Pat] but i was only kidding
[Snoopus] you know, it's not that big a deal timeforce24. If one is a Power Rangers fan, at least judging from this channel and its occupancy, one has a 50/50 shot of being gay.
[timeforce24] Pat i didnt find it that funny mate
* Pat goes to snoopus' side of the room
[MorphinZeo] oh please, have the people in here are either gay, lesbian, bi, animal lovers or do disturbing things to plants. Of the other half, some are "normal" and the rest just have decided what perversion to specialise in
[Snoopus] MorphinZeo - you just described the human race, congratulations
[MorphinZeo] Snoopus - true
[Pat] excuse me but who in here does disturbing things to plant?
[Pat] just for future reference
[Snoopus] although, the plant thing? I dind't get it
[Snoopus] aww NAP!
[Snoopus] SNAP
* MorphinZeo won't tell. JUst know I have the photographs for blackmail purposes
[Pat] i cant help but think nadja

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