Fools and Their Freedoms Are Soon Parted

One of the best-running comedies in Washington these days comes from the show the Republicans are forced to put on defending the various screw ups of George W. Bush and his increasingly error-prone administration.

Gross groupies gather to gab about gal-groping

Shigeru Oohori (a pseudonym) is a 35-year-old "elite salaryman" at a major corporation and loving father of a 10-year-old daughter. He's also a dedicated chikan (groper) who gets his thrills running his hands over the bodies of young women on commuter trains.

According to Oohori, there are two types of chikan. One is the "orthodox" type, who become excited by seeing the expression of disgust on a girl's face at the moment they begin running their hands over her body. The other type, the "technician," aims at subtly titillating the woman using practiced erotic techniques that succeed in getting her wet before she even realizes what's happening.

Members of Oohori's group become eligible for hands-on training sessions, aboard actual commuter trains.

"We all pool our money and employ several girls who let us grope them while actually on the train,"

Dolphin Stress Test


"Being born and having grown up in Singapore does not automatically entitle a person to Singapore citizenship."

LEE BOON HWEE, Head, Corporate Communications Branch, for Commissioner Immigration and Checkpoints Authority in the ST Forum 4 Oct 2003

******

Singapore's hopes for gold in the SEA Games were given a boost on Tuesday after Chinese shot putters Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were granted Singapore citizenship.

- The Star Online - 1 Oct 2003

_______________________________________

Reasons why Barnabas is not a citizen

I REFER to Mr Barnabas Lim Ah Huat's letter, 'Born and bred here but he is 'Stateless' ' (ST, Sept 27), and the letters by Ms Lydia Rahman and Mr Michael Loh Yik Ming ('Do the right thing by Barnabas' and 'Issue is one of legitimacy, not citizenship'; ST, Oct 1).

We would like to clarify why Mr Lim was not conferred Singapore citizenship at birth. He could not take on his father's Singapore citizenship because, as Mr Lim had noted, his parents were not legally married at the time of his birth.

He also could not be conferred Singapore citizenship through his mother as she was not a Singapore citizen then. These are provided for in the Singapore Constitution.

Mr Lim was called up for national service because he was granted Singapore permanent residency when he was 12 years old.

Every citizenship application is assessed carefully on its own merits.

The factors taken into consideration include the extent of family roots in Singapore, the legality of the parents' marriage at the time of birth, national service performance, the good-conduct records of the applicant and the sponsor, and other compassionate factors.

When Mr Lim applied again for Singapore citizenship last year, our officers explained to him why his past citizenship applications had not been successful. Being born and having grown up in Singapore does not automatically entitle a person to Singapore citizenship.

If Mr Lim needs further clarification, he may wish to contact us on 6391-6186.

LEE BOON HWEE
Head,
Corporate Communications Branch
for Commissioner Immigration and Checkpoints Authority

____________________________________

Wednesday October 1, 2003

Chinese shot putters for Singapore

SINGAPORE: Singapore's hopes for gold in the SEA Games were given a boost on Tuesday after Chinese shot putters Du Xianhui and Zhang Guirong were granted Singapore citizenship.

The two women, ranked among the best in Asia for the event, can now represent the city-state in the biennial 10-nation games held in Vietnam in December, the Singapore Amateur Athletics Association (SAAA) said in a statement.

Du's personal best of 18.67m and Zhang's 18.34m compare favourably with the top three athletes in last year's Asian Games in Busan, South Korea.

The pair also dominated this year's 2003 Asian GP circuit, and having surpassed the 2004 Olympic Games B qualifying standard of 17.20m set by the IAAF, they are eligible to represent Singapore in next year's Olympics in Athens. – AFP


This is ridiculous.

"OCT 4, 2003

Think you know what a condom's for? Think again

I REFER to Madam Cindy Tan Hui Cheng's letter, 'Why a condom?' (ST, Oct 1).

One of the most vital requirements for a jungle survival kit is something to help the soldier collect water. The condom in the kit is meant for this purpose.

It is hygienically packaged and more compact than a folded plastic bag, and it can hold a reasonable amount of water.

The condom can also be used to keep the other essential survival items such as matches and medical items dry after they have been opened.

COLONEL BERNARD TOH
Director,
Public Affairs
Ministry of Defence"