On Polytheism

Some people offered the opinion that all monotheistic religions were acceptable, as they were all worshipping the same god. This logic is rather suspect, as I could start my own religion which would worship one God, but it wouldn't necessarily be a real God. This logic also smacks of discrimination against polytheists - who's to say there isn't more than one God, or that he has only one aspect? To the uninitiated, in fact, Christianity appears to be a religion with 3 Gods - or 3 1/2 in the case of Catholicism.

Besides, I can't think of a monotheistic religion which isn't exclusive - John 14:6: "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me". No fervent adherent of a major monotheistic religion worth his salt would tolerate the blasphemous suggestion that he was actually worshipping the same god as those of another faith. So if all of them are worshipping a true God, yet all of the religions are exclusive, then we must assume that there has been a major breakdown in communication between God and his creations. More likely is the fact that, societal development wise, the Primary tier consists mainly of Animistic religions, the Secondary tier of Polytheistic and the Tertiary tier of Monotheistic religions (perhaps the post-Tertiary tier holds but Atheism?).


Luohan Lee

The priest conducting the retreat, whom I have referred to many times, likes to refer to Luohan in his sermons, so some of us called him �Luohan Lee� affectionately.

He bashed some topics merrily, but evaded others. One of countless examples: if murder is bad and we should love our fellow men, what about conscription? As an aside, I really admire the Jehovah�s Witnesses for standing up for their faith even though they have to go to DB for 5 years.

He kept impressing on us that he had a lot of experience and had seen a lot of things, but does that mean he has a monopoly on the truth, as he led us to believe? According to him, this god is rigid and inflexible, and he justified his preaching by taking certain passages from Scripture and then interpreting them as he liked. The ossified beliefs and fundamentalist stances alienated people like me who were not mindless sponges for senseless rhetoric, a pity really.

A roommate and I decided to corner him one night to ask him pertinent questions. Unfortunately, we came away disappointed due to his non-committal, non-intellectual, politically correct answers. Apparently he didn�t look at other religions more than cursorily, yet he was convinced of the superiority of his own, dissembling about how the others were somehow lacking. He claimed that one must search to find the truth, and gave his 2 criteria for a true religion - holiness and love. Which hat he pulled these 2 subjective and contentious rabbits out of he didn�t say, naturally. He said that you must believe - but then belief presupposes God�s existence, so you�re proving something by assuming it - a circular argument. He said what mattered was not doctrine but sanctification - but then the criteria for sanctification seems to be whether someone or something conforms to the doctrine he practices (to him, everything is a sin!). He also revealed that he desired women and wealth too, but he held out for eternal life, something which rather disappointed me and a few others. And in the end, for all his evasive answers, he was still able to preach fierily.

Other priests were a lot more helpful. Most appeared open minded, and the consensus seemed to be - God finds everyone in his own way and in his own time. Well, good for him. If he ever needs me, I�ll be where I always have been. If he doesn�t want me, then I�ll just mind my own business. If he�s so merciful and loving, then why torment people looking for him?

At the end of the retreat. Luohan Lee was asking for testimonies. I was thinking of offering mine, but I didn�t want to be a wet blanket, get stoned or get shouted off by him for being �off point�, so I refrained. Bien Kiat, however, managed to give a testimony while deftly avoiding the issue of religion or �god� so praise be to him :)


Picayune Details

It seems that most people who went were middle aged Chinese - from Singapore, KL, Hong Kong, Miri and Labuan. Before and during the flight there, I was thinking that me and 2 others (one a Raffles Guy GEP) who were born in 1982 were the only Singaporean participants under the age of 40! While flying, it occurred to me that I've been on Ma-laysia Airlines flights so often that I recognised 1-2 of the Air Stewardesses on either trip.

F&N apparently does not wish to unleash its full Alliteration line of Drinks (e.g. Freaky Fruitade) on Singapore - Smashing Strawberry (which tastes like Cough Syrup) and Lucky Lychee are only available in Malaysia. They are all advertised as containing �Real Juice� but most only have Grape Juice. Bah.

Adrian pointed out that from our vantage point on the fourth floor of the Retreat Centre, Mount Kinabalu looked like Mount Doom, sans the Eye of Sauron and the brimstone. And being in the middle of a cloud (when the weather conditions are right) is just magical!

Most of the people who were on the bus I was assigned to send us to the Retreat Centre and back to the Airport were very religious. So religious, that they prayed for even the simplest of things - namely, a bus ride. "We pray that you may keep us safe on our journey to the retreat centre..." This left me speechless. To pray for such a simple thing would be insulting, to say the least. I wonder if any of these people pray before going to the toilet in case a snake comes up the sewage system and nips them while they are sitting on their throne. I would imagine that God isn't a babysitter and we do not need to go to him for every trivial matter, or he wouldn't have put us on this earth.

The vegetables we ate were not bad, the meat less so. The fruit, especially the Sabah Pineapple, was excellent though! Many priests (especially the Indian ones) ate bread at every meal though, so maybe they didn�t like the food (or else we now know why they mostly are quite plump).

I was discussing with one roommate how very religious and devout people can be the most horrible of people - hypocritical, mean and backstabbing. I guess it's Real Life, causing them to rationalise and ignore their actions.

Tim had remarked before that Priests have bad senses of humour, and from the few times I'd heard priests or pastors joke, I got that impression too. Perhaps the reason why they make lame jokes is that they are not supposed to make crude or vulgar jokes - it's sinful to do so!

It seems bass guitarists like genuflecting. And female ones like humping their guitars too :)

�I�m always right� � Elaine. She sounds like my sister!

The Music Ministry people played a song during the Last Dinner, and it was the song that Auntie Mary at Monty�s always listened to! I�ve finally found out that it�s called Jambalaya. And they also played the song used for the Singapore Kindness Movement � I should have known the government would never have composed a new song for the Campaign. Later, one group at another table (rather, floor mat) started singing the Zurangeni (I�ve no idea how to spell it) song that they Malays and Indians in my BMT platoon liked so sing so much. I noticed that they did omit the English lyrics though � �Once the papa met the mama under the mango tree. Then the papa asked the mama, �Will you marry me?�. Then the mama said, �I don�t want�. Then the papa rape the mama under the mango tree.� I related the lyrics to one of the middle aged Chinese aunties, and she was quite scandalised :0

Paul, Timothy�s Uncle, was among those most helpful to me. His efforts seemed to have failed, but I appreciate them, and at least he introduced me to Super Milo � Milo where more than half the cup is filled with Milo powder. Oh, this stuff is potent.

I and some others were at one of the shops near the retreat centre when we saw a male dog nuzzling a female dog, and a drop of liquid fell from its member. Ooh.

Clarence told us that he�s actually featured in the Total Defence commercial that has people in a large group making an arcane symbol near the end. Heh heh.

There were adoration sessions held nightly, but on the first night, my whole room didn�t go due to miscommunication, on the second I fell asleep for most of the adoration, on the third I slept through my alarm, on the fourth I felt like shit for most of the session and on the fifth I was apparently woken up but sat up and went back to sleep, though I have no memory of this at all. I suppose it must be, ah, �God�s Will�.

The priest recalled this email he got, about the importance of not being consumed by work. BUSY - Bound Under Satan's Yoke. How kind of him to offer such a cute acronym. In return, I have a proverb for him - "The Devil finds work for idle hands".


At the airport, I saw the Millennial Edition of the Malaysia Book of Records being sold. I�d always wanted to get this so I can have a picture of the guy who walked backwards, the woman who lived in a room with snakes and the Oldest Man In The World (older, in fact, than the Oldest Person In The World according to the Guinness Book of World Records, but whose claim is recognised only in Malaysia). It was 99 Ringitt but I didn�t mind spending that sum as I was in an impulsive mood. Too bad the book was damaged when I opened it to have a look. At least I saw that there is a record for the first Palm Oil Based Cosmetics (and many other Palm Oil related records too). Malaysia Boleh!

At the airport, too, there was this bookstore with an Islamic section. None of the books had informative blurbs on the back, telling the browser what they were about � especially important since the books were all wrapped up. Instead, the back covers listed the authors� credentials. Bah. There was also a book savaging Evolution, and called Evolutionary Theories �prverted�. Bah x2. Actually I was thinking of getting �Islamic rules on Menstruation and Post-natal Bleeding� but it was 18 Ringitt, so.


The Sabah Song

This was actually supposed to be performed by the Singapore group, but we withdrew at the last minute to avoid offending sensibilities.

To the tune of �Jesus Saves�:
Lyrics by Clarence :)

Father Lee said My People
Come to Sabah
Leave �Sex� Centre
When we come here, find no water
Aiyoyo! should have brought Newater

We thought we were sharing Queen-sized beds
Instead we shared toilets
Although we had a clear, cool wide view
The cow dung stuck to shoes

Chorus:
Monkey see, monkey do
That�s how sin ensnares you
We are healed, blessed and renewed
Jesus saves our people, God bless you

We waited for 72 positions
But we were taught only one *singer kneels*
We stirred and moved when we felt the spirit
Till he said �Hello�

Chorus x2