"The happiest place on earth"

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Friday, November 03, 2006

Quotes:

Philosophy is an enterprise which has been going on for how long. Mill... Thousands of years.

[Student: ***, can you go through quesitons 13, 14 and 15?] Sure, with pleasure. Not with pleasure, but I will.

[Me: Why is there a key around your neck?]... Someone said: "Key to a 'lose your chastity' belt"... [Me: Does that key fit a lock?] Can you find me a lock that this fits? [Me: I saw these earrings. One key and one lock] Did the key fit the lock? [Me: I don't know] Why're you so concerned? [Student 2: He needs closure]

[On carbonara] I asked him for lettuce. He was totally nonplussed... I didn't expect him to put it in. [Me: Why did you ask for lettuce with your carbonara?] I want vegetables.

[Me on a sparkly white crocodile hair clip: Do you know what this is? It's been here for a while.] I thought it was yours. [Me: What the hell?] It goes with the whole rebonding thing. [Me: Right.]

[On a programming test] How can it be wrong lah? Why should I give you a wrong hint?

[Me: I haven't seen taupok in NUS before. Have you?] I stay in hall. Of course got.

[On Asian Prince] I would say that your inclusive fitness is fucked... It's a good waste of sperm propagating you... This kind of diversity in the gene pool is not good... ** - this sort of people is not good for the gene pool. Wo-hen fans, fly shaggers

[On my Asian Prince sighting wallpaper] Don't look! Don't look! It fucks with the mind!

[On a horizontal railing the shape of a MRT track] After playing tomb raider for one month, everytime you see something like this you feel like climbing it.

He says things like 'I have no problem getting girls to give me blowjobs'. [Student 2: Of course lah! He borrows all the money from people to get blowjobs.]

[On herpes] Why is it called the clap? Woo hoo! Gonorrhea! *claps* (???)

If I come up with a burger I shall call it 'Sweet Bovine Death'.

[Me: My friend said there're always been Christian moving companies.] That's true. Every since Moses Christians have been moving here and there.

Actually options are very simple. It's more complicated if you want to make it more complicated. If you want to make it simple it's simple *cries from audience*

[On Aluba] That's why you should only celebrate your birthday with female friends.

You're not sure whether you'll be hell dee (healthy)

I decided to push back the deadline by a couple of days... Just incase some people want to celebrate Halloween.

Ben Ber'nang (Bernanke)

[On Barro-Ricardian equivalence] That makes a lot of people mad.

[On a perfect model of the economy] If anybody can come up with that, he will be a rich man, not an economist.

Brad DeLong, who nowadays is pretty well known as a blogger. He's also an economist on the side.

What about the whole economy as a whole? (economy)

You can't use the term 'blacks' in the USA, you have to use the word 'African-American', but we're here, so it's okay. You have to take note of these things. Yo ucan't use the term 'J-A-P' in the US because it's considered derogatory, but here it's just short for 'Japanese'. (phrase 'African-Americans').

Have a good holiday. Have a good Hari Raya Haji. (Puasa)

[On telling a joke during his time in Engineering] More than half the students started copying, so I put this up to make fun of them. *flashes a OHT with "Ha ha, I'm making fun of you" in Chinese and presumably the same sentence in Malay and Tamil*... Lucky you all didn't copy. USP students [are more discerning]

[On engineering design vs industrial design and subjectivity] In the case of the tissue paper, all of you got full marks. (toilet)

He was thinking differently. I gave him half [a] mark. I think it was *** [Student: I didn't answer the question]

[On morals and ethics] If you ask a philosopher he will tell you a lot of things and in the end you end up where you began.

[To a student] Can you come here and I go sit there? I think you know more about the subject than I do.

The pay'r'urnts (parents)

I'm not doing so good today, so I'll let you all go... Brain freeze. To save myself more embarrassment and save you more confusion, I'm letting you go now.

I can tell you in Singapore... either people have been conditioned or there are cultural elements that makes them amenable to either censorship or circumspection (sic) of freedoms

[Student: I don't really see a correlation between watching pornography and having a pornographic mind] I know. I watched a lot of pornography *laughter from audience* when I was young.

[On spam] Now the pornography is looking for you... Last time it was pull technology... Now it's push technology. [Someone: How come I never get any?]

What do we do? I would like to take some advice from you people so I can tell the Minister when I meet him tomorrow.

Now if I brought in some pornography on this screen and there is a policeman here, he cannot arrest me... This is what I call schizophrenia. These guys are all 50 and above. They cannot understand.

We have just completed our study on blogs during the election time... Most people say technology is liberating... In the Singapore case, the number of blogs... You would've thought that for a country that is considered tech savvy - in blogging we are one of the top countries... how many people had something sensible... to say? Not even three [Ed: ?] people... We tell the government: "You are unduly worried. These people are not interested".

We have this group PAGI - Parents Advisory Group for the Internet... all fuddy-duddies like me. They have no clue... we had this program... most of the parents didn't know how to install it... the kids know. They ask the child, 'Can you install this for me?'. The moment the father turns aside, the kid uninstalls me.

[On parenting difficulties] I've seen him do this so many times. The moment I walk into the room, he does this and it's another screen.
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