"Basic research is what I am doing when I don't know what I am doing." - Wernher von Braun

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I think I'm coming down with something.

Uhh... And at the close of the week too.

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Ode to the Nice Guys

"The nice guys don't often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don't seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can't. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as "oh, he's too nice to date" or "he would be a good boyfriend but he's not for me" or "he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out!" or the most frustrating of all: "no, it would ruin our friendship." Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can't figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I'm going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn't last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single."

This reminds me of the Intellectual Whores theory.

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Azrael: Ya know, I'm kind of tempted to do the Steven Lim photo thingy, if only to edit the photos and send them back to him. Hell... He probably wanks off to a life size cutout of himself.

Heh heh.

***

The current poll on the Government Consultation Portal asks if people are "optimistic that Singapore will be a land of hope and opportunity". Last I checked, 40% (80 people) said yes, and 60% (119 people) said no. Heh heh.

***

Reading the essay: The Attractive Souvenir, I am reminded of the story of Yamasaki, which I shall repost forthwith:


In the spring of 1978, hundreds of art-lovers in Frankfurt, Germany visited an exhibition featuring the work of an "exciting" new artist: "Yamasaki - the Discovery of the Year."

The catalog drew particular attention to the "convincing luminosity of his colors" and "the excitement of his powerfully dynamic brushwork." Within three hours, all twenty-two pieces on offer had been purchased, some for more than $1000.

Excitement increased when the organizer, Behrend Feddersen, announced that Yamasaki would be making a surprise appearance to answer questions about his work. Excitement increased further when the artist was revealed to be... a chimpanzee. "I encouraged him to throw paint on 22 canvases," Feddersen explained, and announced that the proceeds would go "to the circus where he works."

I love modern art. Don't you?

One is also put in the mind of the Emperor's New Clothes.

***

Recently, besides their usual trick of leaving their promotional pamphlets lying around randomly throughout campus: in libraries, bus stops and such (maybe someone should report them for littering!), the fundies have been giving out pamphlets ostensibly about the Tsunami disaster, but which scarcely conceal their not-so-hidden agenda - to convert people.

I'm quite sure proselytisation is illegal under some NUS rule or other.

No matter: I and my little bird have something in the works *g* Muahaha.


Terms and Conditions of Display of Publicity Materials (e.g. helium balloons, banners and posters) on NUS Campus [Ed: All emphasis mine]

"6. Content, Aesthetics, Taste of Publicity Materials

6.1 All publicity materials displayed on NUS Campus shall not be defamatory, vulgar, distasteful, derogatory and prejudicial to National Policy and the good name of the University. Publicity materials on social or community themes are encouraged. Applicants are advised to check with Office of Corporate Relations for suggestions if NUS Corporate Identity is being applied in the publicity materials.

6.2 All publicity materials shall be without prejudice towards the race or religion of any member (faculty, staff, students and alumni), of the University. [Ed: Do the fundies cross the line? Hmm. And I suppose publicity material can be prejudiced towards the gender, sexual orientation and political beliefs of any member of the university] Publicity materials shall also be decent, in good taste and not cause offence to public sensitivities.

6.3 There are to be no publicity materials featuring models clad in lingerie. Intentionally shocking publicity materials (e.g. anti-smoking campaign Publicity materials showing a diseased brain) should be toned down so as not to arouse public sensitivities. [Ed: So something legal in the rest of Singapore and, indeed, promulgated by the Government itself is illegal in NUS. Splendid!]

6.4 The content of the publicity materials shall not encourage or promote consumerism or negative social values (e.g. alcoholic drinks) but should tie in with the Ministry of Education's efforts to inculcate wholesome habits and values in students."


Some names of NUS student events: Indulgence, Decadence, Ecstasy, Harem, Tease, Legal-disiac, Barely Legal, Bare, Naughty by Nature, E XXX othermic, Forplay, Tryst, Compulsion, Envy: Sin or Sense?, Temptations (All bashes except for the last, a bazaar)

What's next? Brothel and Sleaze? (As suggested by Ban Xiong)

I think the names of these activities are a revealing symptom of the sexual deprivation of NUS students. As are the posters advertising them, with people in suggestive poses and female silhouettes. Not that being sexually deprived is bad, I must hasten to add, lest those unfamiliar with my liberal instincts think that I'm imposing a value/moral judgment.

Someone: "why are they so intent on whoring the whole nus student population"

Reader submissions (of sleazy bash names) are welcome encouraged.


I was sitting in the USC club room, trying to polish my essay on Colin McGinn's The Mysterious Flame - Conscious Minds in a Material World, and the urge to check out Internet fads seemed to have gripped the many occupants of the room.

Earlier in the day, they were looking at the All Your Base Are Belong To Us site, and were now looking, in turn, at Badger Badger Badger, the Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me bunny song and the Llama Song (on my suggestion).

YC then decided to gross everyone out by inciting us to visit tubgirl.com and goatse.cx, neither of which really fazed me (especially since I'd seen the first before). However, the rest of the room (mostly females) looked on enraptured, probably for the same reason people slow down to look at car wrecks.

Deciding to return the favour, I loaded the Snopes Breast rash larvae picture, whereupon he freaked out, pulled his jacket hood over his head and ran out of the room screaming, closely followed by all the other erstwhile occupants.

I was finally free to work on my essay in peace!


Quotes:

[On the chin] A lot of scientists, if they can't explain something, will say: 'sexual selection, sexual selection'

Crocodiles, when they lay eggs, the gender depends on the temperature. So when the temperature fluctuates? [Me: You get a hermaphrodite]

[On her canines] Mine look very horrible... mine look like a chimp

[Foisting homo erectus skull cast] Say hi

[On the other group] Why are they taking so slow? Less developed. (long)

[On me and the Asian Prince badge] This fucker is damn weird. He has serious issues.

[On the badger song] I think I heard that being played at Zouk

[On some disgusting picture] This is something no man should be made to see [Someone: No woman either]

[On fair dice] We ignore all those Hong Kong dramas, where the die is loaded, and the outcome depends on the skill of the gambler

[On the symbol for a null set: Ø] By the way, that is not a 'no entry' sign, nor is it the sign for the London Underground

[On probability] Philosophers in the philosophy department here and elsewhere are still getting a big kick from arguing about this sort of thing.

[On probability] You can't conduct the experiment an infinite number of times. You have to stop somewhere, to go to the toilet, to eat, to sleep - whatever.

[On defining probability] Unless you decide to become a philosopher, you will never have to worry about any other definition.

Some people are para'nail optimists (perennial)

I promise you that I'll give you a lot of ana'dotes about famous statisticians to liven up the lecture. Thomas Bayes lived in the 18th Century. This sounds like a kindergarten story, doesn't it? (anecdotes)

After 5 lectures, your experience was so bad that your a priori probability of me being a good lecturer went down.

Those of you who come from engineering and science... I'm an economist. My views of probability and statistics may not be as politically correct as you expect. (?!)

[On x! being the number of ways to arrange x objects] If you can't [understand], then just stay back after this lecture and ask 10 of your friends to stay back.

[On the factorial sign] Not exclamation mark, please. I will shoot on sight anyone who says 'exclamation mark'

You don't have to remember this, because it is an open book exam.

[On conditional probability] If you think about it for seven days and seven nights without eating or sleeping, you might be able to understand it.

The a priori probability was that I was a very nice guy, until this mid-term question came out. Then the a priori probability changed.

[On the Monty Hall game show Let's Make a Deal Car and Goats problem] If you prefer the goat to the car, stop thinking about this problem.